Me, Before Posting A Chapter On AO3: Wow. This Is Really Good. The Syntax, The Inner Turmoil, The Grammar.

@chanty-loves-turtles sorry this took so long I’ve been job hunting and have summer extracurriculars!! but o h b o y this one hurt

thank you for sending it in anyhow :)

nobody really talks about the song three seconds from in trousers but it’s my favorite song and I just wanted to commemorate it by throwing fanart at people

also, go listen to this production if you haven’t from 2019

YouTube

In Trousers (1985 version)

:)

IT'S FALSETTOS DAY IT'S MAY 27th IT'S MENDEL AND TRINA'S WEDDING IT'S THEIR 45th ANNIVERSARY I JUST DID THE MATH ON MY LEG IT'S OK THOUGH AHHHH I HATE MENDEL BUT ALSO I'VE BEEN EXCITED FOR HTIS FOR SO LONG IWUEHTKLSDBJGFG

Incorrect Total Drama

Cody: I've done a lot of dumb stuff.

Gwen: I witnessed the dumb stuff.

Noah: I recorded the dumb stuff.

Harold: I joined in on the dumb stuff.

Courtney: I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF!!!

-

Beth: What if the person who made Walkie Talkies named everything?

Lindsay: Pregnancy tests are Maybe Babies

Cody: Socks are Feetie Heaties

Harold: Forks are Stabby Grabbies

Duncan: Defibrillators are Heartie Starties

Gwen: Nightmares are Dreamy Screamies

Justin: Stamps are Lickie Stickies

Noah, annoyed: You are all disappointments.

-

Chef: Nothing in life is free.

Sierra: Love is free!!

Owen: Adventure is free!

Noah: Knowledge is free.

Duncan: Anything is free if you take it without paying.

-

Courtney: Are we really going to let Sierra keep Cody?

Gwen: We kept Duncan.

-

Sierra: Bye, Courtney! Bye, Gwen! Bye Cody! Bye Duncan! Bye Noah! Bye Cody!

Gwen: You said bye to Cody twice.

Sierra: I like Cody.

-

Gwen: Goodmorning.

Cody: Goodmorning.

Justin: Goodmorning.

Izzy: You all sound like robots! Try spicing it up a little bit!

Noah: Morning motherfuckers.

-

Eva: So my question is, my girlfriend keeps going into the pantry and grabbing handfuls of uncooked fettuccine-

DJ: I would hope that their not grabbing handfuls of cooked fettuccine!

Courtney: In the pantry!

Eva: She keeps eating them raw and calling them chips, how do I make her stop.

DJ: Is your girlfriend here?

Eva, motioning to Izzy: Yeah.

Courtney: You're a MONSTER! Words MEAN things! >:(

Cody: Does anybody remember- I haven't been to Olive Garden in many moons- but they do have, like, a fettuccine bottle that you can just grab out of- and chew-

Cody: NO, WAIT WAS THIS A PRANK YOU GUYS PULLED ON ME WHEN WE USED TO GO TO OLIVE GARDEN AS KIDS??

Cody: NO, STOP, EVERYBODY SHUT UP. DO THEY GIVE YOU RAW FETTUCCINE IN THE LOBBY AT OLIVE GARDEN-

Noah, walking past this insanity: No.

Cody, turning to DJ and Courtney: YOU FUCKIN' BASTARDS

DJ, trying to ignore that: YAYYYYY

Courtney, about Olive Garden: THE ~PRESTIGE~

-

Gwen: Favourite horror movie?

Duncan: IT.

Izzy: Saw!

Courtney: Annabelle.

Noah: High school Musical. After I watched it, I spent the rest of my middle school years thinking everyone would break out in song, and I'd be the only one who didn't know the lyrics.

-

Courtney: You really came all this way to see me? How did you even get here so fast?

Duncan: Several traffic violations.

Cody: Three counts of resisting arrest.

Noah: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.

Gwen: Also, that isn't our car.

-

Harold: What's something you guys are better than Cody at?

Noah: Mario Kart.

Cody: Yeah. He beats me at video games a lot.

Owen: Emotional vulnerability.

-

We need more dark Noah moments.

Sierra: What does 'take out' mean?

Owen: Food.

Cody: Dating.

Noah: Murder.

Duncan: IT CAN MEAN ALL THREE IF YOUR NOT A COWARD.

-

Cody: Why isn't that statue smirking at me?

Noah: It isn't smirking at anyone, their all just imagining it.

Cody: Three of them saw it, Noah, how do you explain that?

Noah: *Points at Gwen* Sleep deprivation. *Points at Trent* Paranoia. *Points at Duncan* Delusional personality disorder.

-

Courtney: Where are Trent and Gwen?

Duncan: Their off playing hide and seek.

Courtney: Where?

Duncan: I don't think you understand how this game works.

-

Chris: I am an idiot.

Lindsay:

Heather:

Courtney:

Duncan:

Cody:

Chef:

Beth:

Noah: If your waiting for us to disagree, it's going to be a long day.

somebody please talk to me about why the fuck william finn decided to make whizzer good at karate

every single fucking time i see reddie all i can think is that

that their a younger version of jared and evan

kill me

i need to draw this as kleinsen now plsplspls

guys I'll be better I swear (I will not)

DEH Incorrect Quotes Pt. 8 I Think??

-

Jared: If I'm extra sarcastic with you it probably means I'm flirting with you or you really annoy me and I can't handle your crap... have fun figuring out which one.

Evan:

-

Jared: I feel like doing something stupid.

Evan: I'm stupid.

Jared: ...?

Evan: Do me?

Jared: oH-

-

Miguel: As the top of this relationship, I think we should-

Connor: I can't believe your pulling rank on me.

-

Evan: I still have no idea how I'm attracted to you...

Jared: Too bad. You're stuck with me now, honey.

-

Evan: My life is a mess.

Jared: Relax. Go get a beer.

Evan: I don't want a beer?

Jared: Who said it was for you?

-

Evan: We vegetarians love the environment. Carnivores are sick freaks.

Connor: How can vegetarians possibly love the environment.. you keep eating all the fucking plants.

-

Jared: I'm bored, any suggestions?

Alana, trying to get him to have a decent sleep schedule: Sleeping is nice.

Jared: I acknowledge your suggestion, and I’m deciding to ignore it.

-

Connor: When life gives you lemons, what do you do?

Alana: Make lemonade! :)

Connor: No! You throw the lemons back up into the sky and make life deal with it's own shit!

-

Evan: That's illegal, right?

Jared: Why do you care, are you fucking a cop or something?

Evan: No-

Jared: Then shut the fuck up.

-

7 year old Zoe: I lost my fish, can you help me find it?

9 year old Connor, cooking the fish: What? Speak up, I can't hear you.

-

Alana: Just be yourself, say something nice!

Jared: Which one? I can't do both.

-

Zoe: Are you drinking enough water?

Evan: Sometimes my tears get in my mouth.

-

Evan: I wanna die.

Jared: We all do, you're not special.

-

Evan: Pick a card, any card.

Connor: Fine.

Evan: Wait, that's my credit card-

Connor: You said any card.

-

Miguel: So, what would you do if you were in bed with me?

Connor: Depends. Is your bed comfortable?

Miguel: Uh yeah, I guess-

Connor: Then I'd sleep.

-

Evan: Where are you going??

Jared: Hell, eventually.

-

Zoe: Hey besties-

Jared: Die.

Zoe: What did I ever do to you-

-

Evan: Jared, I sense hostility.

Jared: Good, because I fucking hate you.

-

Miguel: Happy October 32nd! Second Halloween!

Connor: That doesn't exist-

Miguel: Not with that attitude.

-

Miguel: I wanna be called cute 21/7.

Connor: Why not 24/7?

Miguel: Snack breaks.

-

Connor, annoyed af: Why can't trees give off something fucking useful... like wifi.

Jared:

Jared: So then just fuck oxygen I guess.

-

Alana: *Sharpens knife* We have ways of making people talk.

Alana: *Cuts piece of cake*

Evan: ....Can I have some?

Alana: Cake is for talkers.

-

Evan: What are you drinking?

Jared: Vodka.

Evan: Straight???

Jared: No, gay. Why?

-

Jared: GET BACK HERE YOU DUMBFUCK!

Evan: LET ME RUN AWAY FROM THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY ACTIONS!!

-

Connor: I need you to come meet me, and I need you to come alone.

Zoe: And I need you to be less vague and weird-

-

Alana, texting: Answer your phone

Jared, texting: Wait a minute, I can't find my phone.

Alana: Understood.

Alana, five minutes later: You're a terrible person. You know you're killing me. You're killing me, Jared.

-

Evan: A mosquito tried to bite me and I slapped it and killed it.

Evan: And I started thinking.

Evan: Like, it was just trying to get food.

Evan: What if I went to the fridge and it just slammed the door shut and snapped my neck?

Alana: Are you ok?

-

Miguel: What is the one thing I told you not to do?

Connor: Burn the house down.

Miguel: And what did you do?!

Connor: I made dinner.

Miguel:

Connor:

Miguel:

Connor: Okay fine. And burnt the house down.

-

Evan: Hello, Jared. Made anyone cry today?

Jared: Sadly, no. But it's only 4:30.

-

Alana: When's the last time you slept?!

Jared: Uh.. a few days ago, I think??

Alana: How many days?

Jared: *Starts counting on his fingers*

Jared: I need more fingers.

Alana: What yOU NEED IS S L E E P!

-

Zoe: HELP! I'M DROWNING!!

Connor: Calm down, we're only in six feet of water.

Zoe: NOT ALL OF US ARE TALL!

-

Jared: What'cha doing?

Connor: Stealing my neighbours cat.

Jared: Scandalous.

Jared: Can I help?

-

Jared: Standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak like ‘look at this fucking flower. This flower is taller than I am. This flower is winning and I’m losing.’

Evan: Wow, you are not ready to hear about trees.

-

Connor: *makes Miguel a cup of tea but puts salt in it*

Miguel: *sips tea*

Connor:

Miguel: *finishes tea*

Connor: Didn't it taste bad?

Miguel: Yeah, but I didn't want to hurt your feelings so I drank it all.

Connor, tearing up: Oh, okay.

-

Alana: So I have made the decision to trust you.

Evan: A horrible decision, really.

-

Evan: Hopefully, Jared has learned a lesson about respecting other people's feelings.

Jared: Oh shut up and die, Evan.

-

Connor: Alright, listen up you little shits-

Connor: Except you, Alana. You're an angel, and we're thrilled you're here.

-

Zoe: Can you pass the salt?

Jared: Can you pass away?

Zoe: Too much salt.

DEH Incorrect Quotes Part 17!

-

Connor: Sure, you're verified on twitter, but are you verified in the eyes of god?

-

Jared: Hey random, what are your favorite flowers?

Evan: Peonies, why?

Jared:

Evan: Were you going to get me flowers?

Jared:

Evan:

Jared: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ

-

Evan: I know this isn’t going to end well and I don’t care. So don’t you try and stop me, Jared!

Jared: I wasn’t stopping you. I was asking if you had a spare camera so I can record this.

-

Alana: We've got to find a way to cut down our expenses. What can we live without?

Connor: Jared, probably.

-

Jared, talking to Alana: Well Alana, whenever I’m about to do something, I think ‘would Evan do that?’ and if he would, I do not do that thing.

Alana: …

Evan, from the distance: He's not wrong though!

-

Jared: Die.

Evan: Please don't die!

Jared: FUCKING DIE.

Evan: PLEASE DON'T DIE-

Alana: What..what are they doing?

Zoe, annoyed and tired: Evan bought a plant and now he wants Jared to accept it as their kid.

-

Alana: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?

Jared: If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.

-

Zoe: New year, same me. Because I'm perfect.

-

Alana: Can we go to a haunted house?

Connor: What's wrong with the one we live in?

Alana: W- what?

Connor: Goodnight, Alana.

-

Evan: If I punch myself and it hurts am I strong or weak?

Alana: Strong!

Connor: Weak.

Jared: An idiot. That's what you are.

-

Jared: I have been tricked, I have been backstabbed, and I have quite possibly been bamboozled.

-

Connor: If I can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, I think my body will shut down.

-

Jared: I hate taking off my glasses, because without them, my vision goes from Full HD all the way down to buffering at 240p and I just can't handle that.

-

Evan: Hey, I got a pet snake, what should I name him?

Alana: a pET WHAT?

Connor: William Snakespear.

-

Zoe: Guys, I have a question.

Connor: kys

Zoe: I love you too,

Evan: Ah, yes. Siblings.

-

Jared: Look at the buns on that guy!

Evan: *laying on the floor, covered in hamburger buns*

Alana: This is the comedy police! That jokes too funny!

Jared: I'm not going back to jail!

-

Evan: Guys, my friend here is bilingual.

Jared: Yes.

Evan: Which means he likes both guys and girls-

Jared: Ye- wait, what?

Jared: That's not what bilingual means.

Evan: Shh, it's okay Jared, I still love you, man.

Both:

Evan: juST NOT LIKE THAT-

-

Zoe: Do you think different paints have different tastes?

Connor: They do.

Zoe:

Zoe: Why did you say that so confidently??

-

Evan: What's the signal for when something goes wrong?

Jared: We yell 'oh shit!'

Connor: ..That works.

-

I wish everyone who celebrates Trina Thursday a very good day filled with singing I'm Breaking Down and Holding to The Ground 🫶

happy trina tuesday we love you trin. a