hey here's a website for downloading any video or image from any website.
works w/ youtube, soundcloud, twitch, twitter (gifs and videos), tumblr (video and audio), and most other websites you're probably lookin to download stuff off of.
people are saying do it scared, but you also gotta do it alone. you'll miss out on so much you want to do if you wait til someone will do it with you. do it scared and do it alone.
in case you haven't thought about switching to firefox yet, here's an extension that will...
Notify you if a website you're on has employees that are on strike
Bypass paywalls for major news outlets like the New York Times
Change the browser theme based on the time of day
Directly install third party non-extension scripts
Save individual browser sessions to be reopened at any time
Use the TV format of YouTube in-browser
Make all chrome extensions compatible with Firefox
Turn YouTube dislikes back on
Fix Twitter and make it way less fucked up
Automatically remove trackers from URLs
And many more!
Feel free to add any other firefox extensions you think are slept on.
I'd like to ask for some help from any intersex followers I have (or any intersex folks who come across this post!)
I've been struggling a lot to find proper terminology for intersex issues in my research because Google is all gunked up and Tumblr is just as hard to parse through.
So, if anyone could point me in the direction of any good literature by intersex authors or any good online resources (especially that define terminology) that would be incredibly helpful!! I'm still doing work myself but any sort of direction would be wonderful!
(tl;dr I want to be a better ally to intersex folks in trans feminist conversations about sex/gender and approach my own theory with intersex experiences in mind better! So, any and all resources would be appreciated!)
An informational post on what it is, and advice on how to leave
CW: Incest, paedophilia, childhood sexual abuse, rape, manipulation, gaslighting,
Being a parental incest survivor is incredibly isolating, so I wrote this.
I wrote this with the intention that people currently experiencing this abuse will be able to read it. I took pains to keep the material factual to the ways we are/were manipulated and controlled. I don't discuss specific acts of sexual abuse because these are immaterial to this discussion and individual to the survivor.
Intrafamilial Sexual Assault is the most common form of CSA, Parents are the most common perpetrators of intrafamilial sexual abuse and also the most common perpetrators of childhood sexual abuse, and the next most common being an older sibling. Discretion advised in reading linked criminology paper.
Educational material below the cut.... Please reblog, lack of discussion/knowledge is both isolating and dangerous.
I can't believe I have to say this but I didn't write this for your fandom discourse, I'm not interested in being involved
Cases of parental incest are far more common than people generally believe. At least 15% of people have experienced a sexual contact of some kind by a parent during their life time, with a significant portion of us being subjected to sexual penetration or attempted penetration. This isn't something you need to feel isolated in as a survivor, don't be silent.
Preferably the person you disclose to first is someone who is not connected to your parent/abuser, and is also a person who can help you to leave the abusive situation permanently. If you are a minor you can also make contact with child services (which I encourage if you are below the legal age of independence or there are other children in the house).
Abusers groom their character witnesses as deeply as they groom you. Whatever chips in the wall led you to question your parent/abuser, the people close to them haven't experienced and they have likely groomed the people around you to see you as a "story teller", "attention seeking", or "trouble".
You are likely to be accused of many things, and called many unpleasant names by members of your family and people close to you that you expected to treat you better or protect you, it will hurt.... But you are likely not the only person your parent/abuser has hurt/is hurting.
The reason for telling a person outside of your abusers influence first is that they can reassure you that you are right to act against your abuser if the people you love try to convince you that you're doing the wrong thing.
Adult perpetrators of Incest act with predictable and repeated behaviours to instill a sense of complicity in their victims/children.
Introducing sexual ideas and behaviours through play.
"Love bombing" making the child feel especially important above other relationships in the parents life.
The parent makes great pains to reinforce to the child how "mature" and "trustworthy" they are.
The parent initiates sexual behaviours, typically followed by emotional reinforcement and statements of the child's responsibility for secrecy.
The narrative of the story is often changed to say that the child initiated the sexual relationship, "you were precocious" or "this was never meant to happen, but I'm glad it did".
If the child questions the relationship the parent explains it away, saying that the world doesn't understand relationships like theirs.
The experience doesn't need to match exactly, but it is likely to follow this closely.
We also feel conflict because beyond the grooming, the experience is paradoxical. You still experience sexual responses, arousal, pleasure and orgasm being subjected to intrafamilial sexual assault. It's traumatic and deeply confusing all on its own.
The continuing abuse isn't necessarily sexual, though it often is, exiting any association with the parent/abuser is important because Incest is a particularly insidious vector of control.
The parent/abuser can leverage both the years of grooming, and also the embarrassment of an adult victim with their associated anxiety (with their generally undiagnosed c-PTSD) to exert control over the survivor/victim. Maintaining their silence, subservience and obedience. Allowing the parent/abuser to extract labour, financial support, and near anything else.
There are no excuses, and you should not give any credence to anybody's argument in defence of them... You should not protect them but also you are not required to pursue prosecution of your parent/abuser. We survivors often struggle with significant trauma and have limited support networks. Your safety is paramount and always comes first.
When confronted perpetrators and those close to them will often obfuscate the abuses and their severity.
"it was a lapse in judgement", "I made a mistake", "it won't happen again"...
Or reasons why they can't be reported, such as they are too important to the family's finances, or if they go to prison they will be in danger....
This is the hardest part of it all.
If you have records (text messages, emails, letters, photos) keep them. You may not want to pursue prosecution now, but you may one day.
If you have soiled fabrics, put them in a PAPER bag somewhere dry and later seal them in zip lock bags with those silica gel packets if you can. DRY IS GOOD.
If you have not yet been able to leave your situation, diarise events (date/time, brief description). If it is safe to do so.
This will aid any future legal proceedings... Whether you are seeking prosecution or not.
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(Note: statistically intrafamilial sexual abusers are exclusively intrafamilial abusers, and generally do not have an inclination to abuse children that share no familial ties and may not clinically be paedophiles despite engaging in sexual abuse of children).
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This post does not discuss sibling incest perpetrators and survivors for these reasons.
Primarily my reason is that Intrafamilial Sexual Assault by a Sibling isn't within my experience
My second reason is that perpetrators behave differently at different ages and if I am going to write about Intrafamilial Sexual Assault by Siblings I will dedicate a post to it.
Third, parents are more common as perpetrators than siblings, while siblings are more likely to be prosecuted and less likely to successfully appeal (despite the overall rate of prosecution being low across the board) discussion bridging the two would need to address the failures in justice and the complexity of this is beyond the scope of this post.
One of the most healing things I’ve strove (striven?) to do in my life is viewing sex as just another thing people do, among a host of other things like eating and pooping and playing with cats.
Our entire society, feminists and puritans alike, pushes the idea that sex is uniquely powerful and dangerous, capable of inflicting The Worst Trauma or the Highest Fulfillment, and that’s…just flat out untrue. Other experiences can cause similar trauma: violence, disasters, war, instability. Other experiences can result in transcendent pleasure: trance states, live music, non-sexual intimacy, tattoos.
I think this is where the disconnect in perception about sex positivity comes from, because the phrase itself makes people who already view sex as being uniquely powerful think sex positivity means viewing sex as uniquely good, when actually…it’s mostly about taking sex off that pedestal. Normalizing sex. Making it into just another thing people do. Because that’s the first step in making sure people can engage with sex on their own terms in a healthy way.
Taking sex off its cultural pedestal was the thing that allowed me to overcome the deeply-instilled shame I developed from being raised within Christian purity culture, and from being queer, and from existing as a woman. I think a failure to do that, in feminist circles, often leads to an overblowing of the (very real) harm that sex has the potential to do at the exclusion of other problems facing women and other marginalized groups, which often leads to more shaming rhetoric - just rhetoric that shames different people for different reasons.
Sex is not the enemy and it’s not our savior. It’s just one more thing people can do with their bodies.
kill the imposter syndrome in your head because not only is there someone out there doing it worse than you, they’re also using chat gpt to do it
i know we joke about cis artists having the weirdest sense of anatomy, but also even when the anatomy is fine, no one seems to want to draw women doing normal things
My chronic pain doctor suggested I exercise more
I asked him “how?”
He looked confused. Said I should try a bit every day
I said “not when, how?” I asked what exercises I should do
He suggested half a dozen options that had all been explicitly banned by other doctors. I’m not allowed to run. I’m not allowed to bike. I’m not allowed to use my rowing machine or my punching bag.
I walk my dog whenever I have the energy and when it doesn’t hurt too much
What else can I do?
He told me I should exercise more
And then he changed the subject.
An artist : Aw man! I saw my arts were reposted on Instagram. I’ve asked them to take my arts down but they ignored me.
Me : Say no more! Click this link, then click ‘fill out this form’. Fill the form and wait for about 1-2 days, the staffs will remove the image you were reporting from the reposter’s account :^)
tumblr wisdom, refs, advice, guides this blog exists for me to refer back to |main @kit-kat-kake
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