Alternatives To “i Want To Die”:

more dating advice:

often times the thing a shy person needs to extend themselves a little and show you more of themselves is for you to extend yourself first, show yourself first, and make a safe staging ground for the shy person to emerge— which requires a certain amount of vulnerability and bravery on your part

that vulnerability can be repulsive to people who find vulnerability triggering, but that repulsion isn’t a reflection of you or anything to do with you and encountering that repulsion shouldn’t be taken as discouragement or negative judgement

most people who date don’t want to actually partner up with another human being and create a loving connected relationship with that person, they want to float in a sea of mostly positive feelings that make them feel better about their image of themselves

being vulnerable and brave and real has the power to jerk those people out of the fantasy. it forces them to identify themselves (and to bail) and to stop wasting your time.

other people experience great relief and warmth and increased connection upon encountering someone who can be real and can treat the relationship like it’s real

those people provide a very good baseline to start an actual romantic relationship with.

Remember kids

Pro tip for adulting: being late isn’t a death sentence for 95% of things. All you gotta do is call the moment you realize you’re gonna be late, apologize, and then give another small apology when you get there. The thing people really don’t like about lateness is that it seems like the other person doesn’t value their time, and since calling shows that you value their time, that leaves only the mild inconvenience of waiting a bit for them to deal with

[Drawing of a pink and green dog saying “It’s okay if you aren’t great at something on your first try. Improvement often takes time and effort, and you’re capable of putting in that time and effort. You can do this.” in a green speech bubble.]

i’m so tired of people around being being tiktokified and instagrammable and aggressively beauty and anti-ageing focussed “i need glass skin” “i need to purge my cortisol” “i have toxic estrogen levels” “i need a 16 step shower routine” “i need a 2k face light mask” “i need to only eat grass fed organic pure octopus from the slopes of the Andes” you NEED to be hobbymaxxing actually.

AroAce Database

Just wanted to share this resource in case anyone hasn’t heard of it. Website created by author Claudie Arsenault that has a huge collection of books with characters on the aromantic and/or asexual spectrum. Should be noted that the list is not in alphabetical order - it used to be, but the website is being updated and so things are working differently https://www.aroacedatabase.com/

hello google chrome refugees

don't use any of these browsers, they're also chrome

Here are my favorite firefox plugins for security/anti-tracking/anti-ad that I recommend you get

please get off chrome google is currently being investigated for being an Illegal Monopoly so get outta there okay love you bye

“I don’t want to be a burden” you’re more like a relief, a gift, a blessing actually

it can be hard to leave a toxic environment, but you deserve to be safe.

Digital illustration of a young Asian woman sitting on a staircase in a green tank top and pants. Text reads, 'you deserve to be in an environment that brings out the softness in you -- not he survival in you.'