Look At My Little Guy

just thinking about bilbo thinking about how in love with thorin he is and how grateful hes alive and of their lives together in the shire and how theyre both just so happy and at peace and O;IRGAO;HIERGO;ALEIGHO;AIERG

he was waiting for his goth bf to pick him up

When you got plushies on your bed and you’re abt to fuck

Gaz: is turning them around so they don’t see

Soap: is lining them up so they ALL see

Ghost: is shoving one under your hips so he can raise up your ass and fuck it

Price: is putting one in your arms so you can hold it and squeeze it when you’re overstimulated and squirming

Nik: putting it in your arms and involving it in the dirty talk tbh (“Carrotcake and I are so proud of you, milaya— taking papochka’s cock to the base like this. Did you fuck yourself in this bed while thinking of me, makýshka? Did your silly rabbit know what a slut you are for me before I did?”)

The absolute whiplash

I love the whole concept that all the mortals by the late third age have this idea of elves as these serene, calm, wise and peaceful beings. Like at the council of Elrond and the like they all see the elves as inherently great givers of advice with the bigger picture at heart. Imagine if someone from then read a book on the first age. Like Faramir being exposed to Elrond’s records after he leaves for Valinor and thinking are these really the same species? Why are they setting everything on fire? Was the founder of Numenor really raised by these people? Did the calm lord Elrond really hold a knife to that guys throat? They are all completely feral and bloodthirsty and possess no basic judgement skills. Frodo getting to Valinor and being invited to a party at Finrod’s house. Expecting a deep cryptic discussion on lore and feeling out of place among all these dignified ethereal legends. And like ten minutes in people are playing drinking games with knives and fire. Frodo expects Lord Elrond to be shocked at his relatives behaviour but finds him in a knife throwing competition with the former high king. He seems to be winning. He also sees what seems to be two high kings making out in the stairwell. His last hope is Galadriel whose now in an intense bar fight with three of her cousins. Her husband is cheering her on from the corner.

The elves are not actually inherently wise. They just made all the mistakes and learnt from them after about the fifth attempt.

okay, so i know ppl are talking abt wraiths and implications but im just here like-

aragorn just doesn’t want his new friend to even think abt dying?? he wants frodo, sam, merry and pippin to be healthy, please and thank you, and aragorn will ensure that, for better or worse!

like- he just cares! and i think this is a sweet moment. v “dont u even joke abt that!”

me and my friends high as fuck at taco bell trying to figure out which one of us is coherent enough to order

The canon carrock scene dont @ me

Someone sedate me. I finally got around to making art of these two.

peristalsis

In a bid to escape your own life, you run away to the Scottish Hebrides, seeking utter solitude. Instead, you meet a man who won't leave you alone.

He's handsome, and charming, and unfailingly persistent—and he wears an odd pelt around his waist.

read on ao3

selkie soap x reader. strangers to "lovers." dubcon. breeding kink. suicidal ideation. self loathing. depression. hurt/comfort. angst. smut. afab reader. post-canon. came back wrong.

one . two . three . four . five . six . seven . eight

selkie. noun. sel·​kie ˈsel-kē  : a mythical being with the ability to shape-shift between human and seal forms.

plural : selkies also Selkies or selchies.

commentary track:

original concept what kind of seal is soap? what's up with the pelt in chapter 4?

bonus material:

pinterest board spotify playlist

Eowyn, in a high voice, holding Barbie: Hey Ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!

Merry, in a deep voice, holding Ken: Nonsense, Barbie. you’re staying home and having my kids.

Eomer: What the fuck are you guys doing?

Eowyn, giving him a deathly stare: Playing systemic oppression.

I did not need to be reminded of this*

Rewatched LOTR for the millionth time and took even more psychic damage than usual, have a scene repaint of Faramir suffering