Same Bestie

shoutout to stede bonnet for meeting a guy who was the exact same as him six months prior and going 'man this guy is the most annoying little shit ever.' iconic of him tbh

superbat coparenting robin!dick grayson is so important to me

the demons in hell must be having a riot there's all these rumors about crowley and aziraphale dating and allegedly theres a picture of them together and then 90 years later you hear that a demon and angel ran off to alpha centauri and you're like oh must be crowley and aziraphale they've been a thing for ages but NO its your boss beelzebub (ex boss now, apparently) and heaven's supreme archangel fucking gabriel. like how do you go back to work after hearing this

DONT WATCH GOMENS 2 IT RUINED MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ha ha been there Brucie

Dick: *showing off a cute childhood picture to the family* Oh this one is my favorite! Bruce looks so surprised here, haha! I busted into the bathroom and he almost screamed! It was so funny.

Damian: I can’t imagine Baba getting scared from something so… menial

Jason: Shit was a lot different back then kid. I once scared the old man when. I once scared him in the Batcave when he was examining a gun from a case. Weirdly enough he didn’t get mad at me. I’m pretty sure there’s a picture of that too, it’s in here somewhere. *starts flipping through a photo album*

Tim: *grabbing his own photo album* I noticed that! Sometimes Bruce gets pretty weird and startled easily. Still haven’t figured it out… I bet Steph also had a bunch of stories of the same thing

Bruce: *walk in to the living room* What are you all doing? Hopefully not causing any trouble.

Dick: *grinning widely and pulling Bruce to sit down near him* Nah, not this time. We’ve just been going through a lot of old pictures! See! *shows Bruce the picture*

Bruce: *squints at picture before frowning* Oh, I remember that. I was in the middle of a suicide attempt and you caught me

Dick: WHAT! *coughing and sputtering*

Bruce: Yes, see the knife by the bathtub? And the bottle of pills near the toilet? Dropped them when you busted in. I thought you knew?

Jason: *absolutely shocked* Pops… what the hell???

Bruce: *glances over at the picture Jason found* That one too. I was going to turn the gun on myself.

Jason: *looks down at picture in horror*

Bruce: *grabs the photo album from Tim’s hand and flips through it* About half of these are interrupted attempts lol. The other albums probably have more. *shrugs*

Damian: *teary eyed* Baba…

Bruce: *already moving Damian onto his lap and hugging him tightly* Oh no sweetie, it’s okay. I’m… I’m trying to get better. I’m sorry I really thought you all knew…

Tim: *hides his face in Bruce’s shoulder while hugging him* I should’ve noticed. I’m sorry…

Bruce: No Tim, this is never and will never be your fault. It’s not your job to take care of me, even if I did push it on you when we first met. None of you have done anything wrong.

Jason: *voice breaking* B-but…

Dick: W-we could’ve… *tearing up*

Bruce: Done absolutely nothing. I was in a dark place long before I met any of you, even being with Alfred didn’t help.

Dick: I still can’t believe I never noticed… w-what happened to you after I left? After Jason died?

Bruce: Let’s not talk about that, it’ll only make us all upset.

Jason: *flipping through photo album and scrutinizing every photo* Y-you look so gaunt in these… I’ve never noticed…

Bruce: *chuckles awkwardly and slowly pulls album out of Jason’s hands* Yeah, that’s what an eating disorder will do to you. And coke…*mutters*

Tim: Fuck…

Dick: What was that last part?

Bruce: Nothing, anyways… let’s stop talking about this, okay? I made brownies.

Damian: *still sniffling* Okay Baba… can we have ice cream too?

Bruce: *chuckles softly, smiling fondly at all his sons* Of course, cmon, before Alfred finds out.

couldn’t have said it better myself.

good omens 2 is genuinely so funny. it's like a good omens/crossover fandom fic got turned into a whole 6 hours of television. crowley and aziraphale kissed and then immediately broke up. the main plot of the show revolves around trying to get two lesbians together jane austen style. half the runtime is dedicated to random historical flashbacks of crowley and aziraphale homosexually interacting. they got rid of every single one of the straight couples. it's canon compliant to the bible

jason and that damn motorcycle

yk one of these days he's going to get hurt on that damn thing and it's not like he can come back to life!!! .....oh wait-