p-main

Latest Posts by p-main

This is going to be my excuse after spending 30% of my work hours in meetings

They're called World's FINEST because look at them!

sending love to those fighting the job market

it's just me and my gay fanfics against the world

283,000 likes………giant meteor strike the earth rn holy shit. oh my god.

favorite Bruce Wayne hc of the week: you’re allowed to follow him into the Cave to continue your argument, but he’s going to start undressing and pulling off armor while heading for the showers and if you get an eyeful, that’s on you.

It’s an effective tactic and stops a good 60% of those arguments in their tracks. The remaining 40% are usually intense enough to follow Bruce into the showers and yell at him while he’s casually showering off grime and blood.

I love how when this Superman was revealed to the public, everyone decided

Ah yes, he shall IMPREGNATE Battison.

Like damn, at least let the guy take him out on a date first.

They're called World's FINEST because look at them!

Dick, tired after another session of being bullied by his own siblings: God, do we even have someone in this family who is accepting?

Tim: Well, not me and Steph, obviously

Damian: I am not in this particular competition. Perhaps Cain?

Stephanie, scoffing: Absolutely not my beautiful Cass. She judges you hard every day in my dms.

Dick, hopeful: Duke?

Damian, who had been shit-talking about others with Duke for a year now: You have a wrong idea in mind, Grayson.

Cassandra, appearing out of nowhere: Jason.

Tim, instantly protesting: No! He is like, professional hater.

Cassandra, shrugging: Does he hate things? Yes. Does he judge? No. Try admitting the most different things to him — you will see.

Everyone: ...

Everyone: On it.

Tim, eying at Jason, who sits in the Batcave during one of the missions: Jason?

Jason: Mhm?

Tim: Urgh... I fucked up. Forgot about Bart's birthday.

Jason: Okay? Just aplogise and gift him stuff.

Tim: ...Okay, wtf, since when you are so understanding?

Jason: Wtf?

Duke: Urgh, Jason?

Jason: What?

Duke: I got in the fight in school.

Jason: Well, you clearly won?

Duke: Yeah, sure.

Jason: Cool. Have fun dealing with the aftermath.

Duke: ...

Duke: ...Thanks?

Stephanie: I eat pineapple pizza and coat my watermelon with Nutella.

Jason:

Jason: ...Okay? Bon appetite?

Stephanie: !!!

Damian: I probably killed someone by the accident.

Jason: Aha. Is that a request for my cleaning services or just an information to keep in mind?

Damian: ...Second one.

Jason: Ok. Have fun.

Dick, a week after: Man, okay, you are clearly not high, I checked. What is the secret of such an angelic level of acceptance while being a hater????

Jason: I follow the Idk+Idc rule. I don't know and I don't care.

Dick: But don't you feel outrageous? At least sometimes? LIKE, MAN, WATERMELON AND NUTELLA?

Jason: I don't know. I don't care.

Jason, after a beat of silence: Unless it is Bruce. Him, I judge.

Dick: ...Of course.

I can see this happening to Bruce #batman is a tired dad

ohhh I recognise a brucie wayne when I see one🙂‍↕️🦇❗

my honest reaction:

*taps microphone* is this thing on? Okay…

🎤 THIS IS A REMINDER THAT ALL OF THE ROBINS ARE SMART, GENIUSES IN FACT. THEY ARE IN A FAMILY OF DETECTIVES. THATS LIKE THEIR WHOLE THING. ALL OF THE ROBINS (AND THE REST OF THE BATFAM TOO) ARE CLEVER, STRATEGIC, AND CAPABLE, NOT JUST TIM. (No hate to my boy Tim, though. I love Tim.) YES, EVEN THAT ONE. Thank you. 🎤

when talking about AI remember the different versions:

Analytical AI, is the one that can detect cancer and save lives

Generative AI is the one that steals art to make it worse, and gives you a wrong answer every time you google something

Weird Al is the one who got his ponysona to canonically have children with a pony from my little pony

i am nooooot locked the fuck in. im locked the fuck out. call the locksmith

okay but the trinity all representing hope in complimentary ways

batman is the hope of healing. of being better. the hope of, "this is terrible but i can make it better." the hope of "i am in the dark place, but there is a light in the darkness." the city is broken, some would say irreparably so, but that story isn't over.

superman is the hope of goodness. there ARE good people and they WILL do the right thing. clark is superman because that is the natural extension of who he is as a person. holding helping the old lady across the street is the right thing to do. saving the person trapped in a burning building it the right thing to do. its the same, if you have the means to do good, do it.

wonder woman is the hope of change. the second opinion on the state of humanity going "i can work with this." she works with the UN, she acts as a peacekeeper and she tries to make the world better for people because she, completely, honestly, believes they can change

this website is full of some of the greatest writers ever to use their talents for evil and chaos with no payoff whatsoever

couldn’t have said it better myself.

Most of DC writers be like:

By far the funniest reaction I’ve seen to the new Superman trailer is, ‘yeah, Luthor does look like he’d create Superboy.’

Interviewer, catching Damian in costume: Robin! Can you explain the process of picking up Robin or passing on the mantle?

Damian, mildly annoyed at Bruce at the moment: It's quite simple. Batmam steals young children from their bed, usually nine or ten or so. Then he takes you to his lair and give you a deal.

Damian: If you can beat him in a game of your choosing, he will train you to be Robin. If you lose, you are eaten. I beat him in a classic fencing game. He's quite good with swords, but he wasn't very good with the sport itself.

Tim, standing next to him: Yeah, I beat him at a memory card game. I like totally cheated, but I'm too old for him to eat now, so ot doesn't matter.

Damian, nodding: Yes. The worst part of the job is disposing of failed Robins bones. He usually sucks them clean and leaves them all over the floor.

Tim: Yeah, its messy. But after you hit, like 15 he stops trying to eat you, so that's cool.

Damian: I have not yet reached 15. I'm still in danger. If you have more questions, ask Nightwing, as he was the first to avoid being eaten.

-

Same interviewer, at a different date: Mr. Nightwing. Is it true Batman tries to eat potential Robins?

Dick, who has no idea what she's taking about: Yeah, it's really scary. His jaw unhinges like a snake.

It's so funny to me that Mary Shelley, her husband, John Polidori, and Lord Byron had a competition to see who could write the best horror story and she wrote fucking Frankenstein. Imagine losing a competition that badly. Imagine just doing a silly little competition with your friend and she basically invents a new genre and creates one of the most famous characters in fiction. Imagine being proud of your little story and then she shares one that people will still read every day in 200 years. Imagine doing a writing competition with your wife and she becomes so recognizable that you'll always be known as Mary Shelley's husband

Fingers crossed

I can totally see James Gunn’s Superman being all deep voiced around the public and the Moment Batman goes “come on we have to go…” a voice crack and a shrill “coming!”

Me, 5 minutes after starting my shift and seeing all the shit I have to deal with.

i know what this situation needs…explicit fanfiction

“People think that Clark is Bruce's sugar baby” WRONG. People think that Clark is his personal assistant because Clark spends every minute of his existence next to Bruce in a clerk's suit. He never wears a badge for a newspaper representative because he has a personal pass to every building owned by WE. He constantly takes notes while Bruce whispers in his ear. He brings Bruce coffee at charity events because Bruce doesn't maintain any human-like sleep schedule. He spends most of his spare time in Bruce's office. Half of the staff knows him by name and discusses work gossip with him. When they go public, the board of directors asks Clark to sign papers confirming that Bruce didn't abuse his power to start dating him. Clark just laughs at them.

"came back wrong" but it's from work

"came back wrong" but it's from work