The Hybrid Fossils

Humanity’s Place in Pokemon

Ok, hear me out.

Humans are weak as hell.  Compared to Pokemon, they’ve got no semblance of a chance in a fair, one-on-one fight. Pokemon can breathe fire, or control nature, or shift the earth with merely a thought. Humans? We can... punch, I guess. Kick. And it’s far weaker than any fighting type.

When humans evolved in a world of Pokemon, they needed to find other ways to even the odds. Tools, first. Then makeshift weapons. Then machines. Civilizations sprung up out of necessity, specifically in places where humans could have a chance of surviving: breeding grounds. Fertile areas, full of resources, food, and great places to nest made these little areas less prone to extremely strong Pokemon, places like the Indigo Regions, or Hoenn, Unova, Kalos, etc etc.

And that’s probably it. These little places on the coasts of great continents, carved out of the wilderness with back-breaking effort and so so much time are the only bastions humanity has against the terrifying, powerful depths of whatever lies outside the borders. Crossing the wilds is unthinkable, it’s suicide. The only option for travelling between regions is by sea, or by air (excluding Kanto-Johto). So these regions are all that humanity has. Little islands of safety in a world of unimaginable power and strength.

TL;DR: Humans are survivors, and had to MAKE their place in the Pokemon World, because otherwise they would have gone extinct a LONG time ago. 

Alright, so, uh, hi! Intro post time.

I'm Ophion, he/him, and I am a gargantuan fucking nerd. I love good worldbuilding or interesting concepts, and because of that I have often found myself obsessing over tv shows, games or movies with awful fandoms. I liked their ideas, don't judge me.

My main hyperobsession is Pokemon, though (yes, I'm neurodivergent. ADHD diagnosed, high probability of having autism as well). Probably because I'm a biology nerd, and I'm studying Bio in college right now. I play a shit ton of video games, and read a LOT of fanfictions. Mostly the ones trying to tell a good, cohesive story, though. You could hold me at gunpoint and you could not force me to read anything unsavory.

I'm mostly planning on posting my worldbuilding ideas for either those media bits or personal worldbuilding projects. Or just inane ramblings somewhat related to those things.

You've been warned.

sometimes i think about the fact that the name i chose a couple years ago to be the name i'd be known online as (ophion) happens to be shared with a giant, hypermuscular, dad-bod, scaly-ass dragon from some japanese mobile card game and it haunts me at night

Poorly drawn Pokemon of Myth

So I've been playing Deep Rock Galactic a lot lately (for those unaware, it's a horde shooter game about space dwarves in an alien planet) and it's got me thinking.

Space dwarves, in this universe, exist. Obviously. So do elves, because the dwarves constantly mention "leaf-lovers." Space elves. The voice over at Mission control is likely a human, owing to the lack of a beard and very different accent/tone. Goblins are also implied to exist via voicelines, though it's only like one or two mentions (via insults in case of friendly fire).

Now, of course, this is just one game. There have been other cases of elves or dwarves or similar-looking creatures in sci-fi, such as Warhammer 40k, with the Eldar, and the Orks.

But it's the first instance (that I am aware of) where true fantasy races, with no augmentations, reached technological advancement high enough not only reach space, but develop their own intergalactic or at least interstellar civilization.

If all the classic fantasy races went to space, what would they all be doing?

The dwarves would be miners, obviously. Like in DRG, they'd like their weapons, have an eye for precious metals and gemstones, and love mining and underground locales. It's in their blood.

On the other hand, the elves might be more nature-centric. They might be more dedicated to protecting planets that are full of life from expansion and industrialization, mostly by humans, as humans do what humans do: expand, conquer, wage war, all that jazz. They showed this to a certain degree in DRG's seasons 1 and 2, with a gargantuan rival incursion. While it's not stated who runs the rival company, it's likely humans, due to how advanced the tech is, and the fact that they only use tech. No living organisms are sent down into the planet's caverns.

Orcs? They'd probably continue to wage war. Question is, would they be like the Orks of Warhammer 40k, with eyes only to destroy and conquer other peoples, or could they be hired? Say, "we'll give you a shit ton of gold and riches and in exchange you go kill off anything bad on this planet, ok?"

That's just my ideas, though. Who knows, maybe DRG will expand upon this lore in later seasons (I sincerely hope they do).

ok hear me out

if regigigas moved all the continents of the pokemon world into place, it probably fucked up a few times

like maybe he was just tugging on this world’s version of the horn of africa and then woops it tugged just a little too hard and now the nile river’s a chasm that runs well into sudan

or maybe it was just trying to shape the curve of south america and uh oh, now the entirety of brazil is just an island and the entire amazon basin is flooded

Mood for today and every single week that will follow

Plant Pokemon are somewhat of a contentious subject among scientific communities. Are they a Pokemon, or something else entirely? How does their (and many other grass types) chlorokinesis work? This is still a subject being heavily researched by many top professors and scientists around the globe, though some common theories remain.

1. Plant Pokemon are not sentient flora, but instead are fauna who take on the appearance and attributes of flora. The theory states that sometime in a certain lineage’s ancestry, a line of fauna developed a kind of natural symbiosis with a plant. Over time, the two grew more intertwined, until the two were simply one organism. This theory has incredible merit, as we have multiple cases of flora-fauna symbiosis in nature. The most notable example is the Bulbasaur line, with each new member of the species being given a seed bulb which takes root in the Bulbasaur’s back. The two will then provide energy, minerals, protection, and a variety of other things symbiotically to one another. Thus, Pokemon such as Lilligant are simply Pokemon that have grown to become one Pokemon with their chosen symbiotic partner. It’s been observed in several different autopsies of plant Pokemon that their makeup is a strange mixture of both plant cells and animal cells. Plant cells typically comprise the exteriors of plant Pokemon as well as key appendages such as leaves or vines, while having a few key features of fauna such as nervous systems and digestive systems. 

2. Chlorokinesis is an advanced form of kinesis. It’s been proven that almost all typings have some form of psychic ability. However, more often than not, it is specialized towards a certain element. For example, Fire Pokemon generate heat and fire naturally (more often than not, in some specialized organ), but can manipulate and control it outside of the body using pyrokinesis. However, chlorokinesis does not work the way that other psychic abilities work. Instead of manipulating the already pre-existing substance, which is produced naturally, chlorokinetics instigate extreme, controlled growth in plants, even to the extent of making specific plants grow for specific purposes (ex: leech seed). This could be in their own plant appendages, or naturally existing plants. How this works is unknown, as the energy and minerals have to come from somewhere to instigate such insane rates of cell division and movement, but there are no current explanations for this.

3. All plant Pokemon are both autotrophs and heterotrophs. This theory has the most evidence for it out of all the theories listed, as studies and experiments have been conducted thousands of times across the centuries on Bellsprout in particular (being an ideal test subject for exhibiting both). Bellsprout was observed eating and digesting various meat samples, and later using the highly corrosive acids within the cup to break down the meat samples for protein content. Later, within an hour, it was observed taking large amounts of time to stand in the sun, conducting photosynthesis. Due to this dual nature, most plant Pokemon completely lack respiratory systems, as the oxygen produced as a by-product of photosynthesis can directly be used in cellular respiration, which produces carbon dioxide, and the cycle continues. Plant Pokemon do have stomata in case of an imbalance, but most of the time this is unneeded.

We may not fully understand plant types, or grass-type Pokemon as a whole, but at the very least, it provides plenty of interesting theories and experiments for years to come.

homestuck tumblr please tell me im right about this

Poison types already had a bad rap before the Rocket Age, despite what many seem to claim. Poison types are widely considered to be an “evil” type, among Dark and Ghost types, for the reason that many species of poison types naturally have “toxic” personalities. These species are considered reclusive, territorial, and in some cases, sadistic, taking enjoyment out of the suffering of their prey or enemies under the influence of poisons, toxins, or venoms.

However, this is a stereotype that has been unfortunately applied to all poison types, regardless of demeanor, especially after the infamous Rocket Age, where the grunts primarily used specific normal and poison type Pokemon, which were known for reproducing easily, or were extremely common at that point in time (Grimer and Muk being prime examples, as many cities at this point in time were struggling with pollution and litter). As a result of this, and several other terrorist organizations to sprout up in the following years, such as Galactic and Flare, poison types gained a horridly bad rap that the public could not shake off.

Despite this, poison types, while often considered difficult and mostly suited for highly skilled trainers, are mostly comprised of loyal Pokemon, if not completely average Pokemon, that simply use poisons, toxins or venoms in their arsenal. For example, one of the most loyal and incredibly beginner-friendly Pokemon is the Nidoran lines. If you bond well to a Nidoran, it will often carry young trainers through at least their first few badges, if not well into the League (there have been quite a few documentations of Indigo Conference participants having Nidokings or Nidoqueens on their rosters).

Another incredibly beginner friendly Pokemon is Gulpin and Swalot. These Pokemon have gelatinous bodies, which are not actually poisonous at all. Instead, their poison comes from their incredibly potent stomach acids, which is one of the highest grade acids on the globe, with a pH of 0.04. Despite this, all you need to win a Gulpin’s loyalty and affection is a steady diet of basically any kind of food or organic substance that tastes remotely good (most of the time, they’re not picky, though they do appreciate better tasting foods). As many have described them, they are a budget Snorlax. Be warned though, while Gulpin are mostly safe, Swalot does upgrade its poisonous capabilities by sweating out excess stomach acid it generates, which can be weaponized.

But the point stands, poison types are incredibly versatile, and do not deserve the reputation they have garnered by human factors.