Also Can We Discuss That Remus Had A Legit Paddle Like How Was That Bought As A Prop Was It Borrowed

Remus, proud of knowing something: Logan. I have a fact.

Logan, not looking up from his book: Proceed.

Remus: Male reindeers lose their antlers in the winter, while female reindeers don't. All of Santa's reindeers have antlers, meaning they're all female, but the media says they're men because they don't want a team of strong females depicted.

Logan: Or they aren't cis. Ever think about that?

Remus: Wait wha—

Logan: Maybe they're transgender. Don't be a bigot, Remus.

Remus: I'M NOT—

Remus: Wait—

Remus: Am I being a bigot???

Logan: I don't know, are you? You're assuming their gender aligns with their sex.

Remus: *now having a crisis*

Janus, walking past, unable to help it: So you could say they're... Transgendeer.

Logan, hopping up, beating Janus with a pillow: I'm trying to escape Patton's constant puns, goddamnit!

The twins have been beaned! Virgil is half-beaned and I am now out of beans, I must get more to complete my quest

Patterns: cut

Colors: matched

Bois: pinned together

Reference boi: ready

Special eyes for the special boi: Ready

Remus: When you pet a cat real good and it leans into your touch so hard it flops over? That's the shit.

Logan: Or when a cat kneads you with its little paws? Absolute heaven.

Janus: When a cat pushes away your book and flops down where it was so you pay attention to it instead of the book.

Patton, who just appeared to tell them it's dinnertime, eyes full of tears: Yeah that's the best haha anyway dinner is ready

Logan, fluffing Patton's hair: When you play with Pat's hair and he turns pink because he's adorable.

Patton, blushing: *incoherent stammers*

Janus, sliding his arms around Patton's waist from behind: Or when you hug Pat because he's so soft and cuddly.

Patton, blushing deeper: *more incoherent stammers*

Remus: When your boyfriend's holding Pat so you can do this:

Remus: *kisses Patton on the cheek*

Patton, bright red:

̷̨̨̡̛̙̠̳͇̘͙̩͓͔̗͙͓̘̖̗̪̱̯͓̩̖̭̞̠͖̞̫̹͎̖͎̪͖̦̰͓̞̜̖̭̝̪͊͌͐͗͛̎̔͋̇̓̒̽̉̓̅̓̅́̀̍̅̐̐͑̌̇̾͐̚̚̚͜͠Ą̵̛̪͚̲̫̲̱̫̤̗̰̬̗͑̾̈́̌̐͆̋̅̀̄̂̂̇̿͂̽̀͗͌̆͗̂̓̽̔̑̔͑͠ͅḤ̶̡̡͔͍̟̠̣̱͍̱̖͎̪̝̟͇͖̙̠̬̩̳͇͙͇̦̃́̒͋͛͌̉̈́̊̌̋̀̔͆̈̇͌͒̿̔̎͜͝ͅH̵̢̧̡̧͓͎͙̣̜̺͚̩̼̼̯̟̤̝͕̩͉̯̮̼̪̳̪͇̺̰̆̽̎̀̿́̒̄̃͋̅͛̑͗̇͠͝Ḩ̵̛̘̣̖̝͆̅̆̔͌͋͐͗̆̃͊̏͛̐̄́͂̂͒͂̒̈͊̂̉͌̐̂̊̎̐͒̋́͘͘͝͝͝͝H̶̢̰̳͕̰̲̲̲̬̳̫̪͚͕͔̝̘̹̭͇͇̙̩̜̯͇̣͓̙̺̲̘͎̠͔̫͉̙̞̼̺͓̹͍̰̗͎̊̌̀͗͊ͅͅH̶̨̲͎̰̯͙̹̯̾̓͛͋̍͗̊̕H̷̡̢̢͖̻̭͍͉̠͉͉̦̗͕̩̥̭̜͇͈̳̦̫͓̞̼̹̪̦͚̃͊͊̇̀̄͗͒̓̈͐̆̏͒́̑́̅̊̓̍̑͊̈͛̍̈́̍͗̆̈̅͐̋̉̽̃̽̍̾̾̈́̇̕͘͜͜͠H̶̗̫̬̘̊͌̒̉̀͌͘͝ ̶̢̨̻͕͙̼̘̱̮̖̭̥̠̤͔̲͔̼̥͖̘̙͉̠̹͙̮̙̜̻͕̞̜̫͙͕̾̓̐̏̈́̽́̈́͛̐̀̅̐͂̏͛̀́̄̀́̓̎̄̑̀̿͛̋̔͒́͜ͅͅͅ

Logan: Let me get this straight—

Patton: Good luck with that!

Logan: You made a two-layer lemon cake.

Patton: Yes.

Logan: It is not vegan or gluten-free, only dairy-free. It has eggs and wheat.

Patton: Yes.

Logan: Your mother is allergic to gluten, your brother is vegan and doesn't like lemon, your father isn't a huge fan of desserts.

Patton: Yes.

Logan: So you made an entire two-layer cake that only you can eat.

Patton: Yes.

Logan: And you made it how long ago?

Patton: Yesterday.

Logan: And you've eaten how much?

Patton: Half.

Logan: ...How.

Patton:

̴̢͈̘̫̟͍̠̙̻̹͑̿l̴̛͎̪͚̺͚̪͂̊̅̅̈̌̈́̌̕͠e̵̡̱̦͎̹͍͉̭̗͙͇͍̖̹̩̾̌̔͛̑̽̄͋̚͠ ̵̧̢̗̑̔͐̈́̓̑͊̈́̓̈́͗͌̓̇͒̑̉͘͜m̸̰̖̲̪̋̅̍̈́́̈̓̈̂͒̓̓͘͜͝ȏ̵͔̞̘̹̤͈̈́̈́̎̉́̔̉̈́̂͊̚͘͠͝͝ǹ̸̝̞͇̣̪̻́̂̂̂̏̅̌͌̽̂͒̀́͘͝ ̴̡̙͉͎͈̦͙̖͍͉͖̝̺̀́̈́̑́̄͘͠ ̴̢̧̱̝̫̝͇͍͉͈̙̱͕̣̙͖̲̹͋̿́͐͗̀̈́̅̇̓͜c̷̨̳̩̳̮͈̞̪͖͎͎͉̏͆́̃̚͠á̶̢̝̩̽͂̌͛͆̀̐̂̃̇͂̊̈́͒̇̑̕͝ ̸̢̟̮͚̫͔͈̖̟̥̗̣̰̮̓̈́̈́̏͐̅̎̿̋̚̚k̸͓̗̲͍̯͈̯͆̌̈́̿̒͛̾͊̒͗̒͋̚͝ ̵̡̡̨̧̛̮͙̯͕̤̮͇̥̽̒̐̈́͑̂͌̔̈͑̓̽̚ḝ̷̢̦̮̣̺̭̭͉̈́̄́̿̆̂͘͝ͅ ̸̫̥̗̳͎̮͕̬̼̬̥̘̑͑̑̀̈̓͛̔̈́̊́̌͘͜͠ ̷̢̡͈̝͚̖̙̩̺̼͔̭̻͚̝̹̀ ̴̨̩̣̳̜͓̠̘̗̟̦͇̪̳̗̈́̅͛̄͊͜͝͝

- Finds out my nemesis has a peanut allergy

- Puts peanut oil in my water bottle

- Goes to meet nemesis

- Confesses love

- Drinks peanut oil

- Kisses them

- I've think I've won

- Plot twist

- They planned this

- They aren't allergic to peanuts

- And now we're dating

- Oh shit

And now, a new one

Heart broke: Good Omens isn't a romance because while Crowley has been in love with Aziraphale for 6000 years, Aziraphale is either too oblivious or scared to see what's right in front of him and pushes Crowley away

Broke: Good Omens isn't a gay love story because Crowley and Aziraphale aren't in love

Woke: Good Omens is a gay love story because Crowley and Aziraphale are in love

Bespoke: Whether Good Omens is a gay love story or not is debatable; it is, however, undeniably a story of the love between Crowley and Aziraphale (whatever type of love that may be)

Neil Gaiman: Good Omens isn't a gay love story because while Crowley and Aziraphale are in love, they are not human males, they are an angel and a demon

Breaking News: World-Class Soft Pretzel Maker Invents New Solution To Dip Pretzels In Before Baking

The baker is quoted as saying the usual baking-soda-and-water method was "too basic for [their] taste"

C!Thomas: *cleaning a litterbox while catsitting for a friend*

Remus: Huh, that kinda looks like a salted nut roll.

C!Thomas:

C!Thomas: *deep sigh* And now I'm never eating one of those again.

"Femboy" is a wonderful term. But I was thinking, what happens when you get older, and you're too old to be a 'boy' but too young to be an "Old Queen"? Are you just a "feminine-presenting adult male"?

So, allow me to propose a new term:

Fem&Men.

Remus and Logan: *playing Hell Chess*

Patton and Janus: *teleport in*

Janus: LOGAN! Tell Patton he does not have birds in his head!

Patton: Logan!! Tell Janus he doesn't know everything!

Logan, raising an eyebrow: What?

Patton: So, whenever my doctor examines my ears, these little birds tweet! He says I have a little family of birds living in my head!

Janus: Correction, to make Patton sit still during checkups, his doctor makes bird noises and pretends to check on birds in his head instead of his ears.

Patton: Hey, I'm perfectly still! I don't want him to poke a bird!

Janus: *gestures wildly at him*

Logan, completely serious: Oh, no, I'm afraid you're wrong here, Janus. I've seen Patton's medical records, he has a small family of birds living in his head and has for years. It's a harmless condition.

Janus: *stares at him in WTF manner*

Patton: Ha! I told you! Devon and his family ARE in my head!

Remus: What's in my head?

Logan, no hesitation: A single rat on a wheel. His name is Maurice.

Remus: Is he a space cowboy?

Logan: And a gangster of love.

Remus, grinning: Cool.

Patton: Ooh! What's in Roman's head?

Logan, also no hesitation: A frog named Roberto.

Patton: Awesome! I'm going to tell him.

Patton: *sinks out*

Janus: WHY.

Logan, smiling mischievously: You've got a transgendeer in yours.

Janus: MOTHERF—