I Hate Food And I Hate Myself, Lord Have Mercy On Me And Let My Binge Run Through Me By Morning So That

The guilt is eating me alive, knowing that it was my decision to binge, to keep eating despite knowing I shouldn’t, I didn’t have too, no one would have even truly batted an eye if I hadn’t of.

Now it feels like I can’t stop eating, I’m not even hungry my brain just won’t stop thinking about it.

I hate myself so much.

GUYS IVE MADE IT INTO 51KG TERRITORY IM ONLY LESS THAN HALF A KILO FROM BEING UNDERWEIGHT (I’m still considering myself 170cm until I get it properly checked at the doctors) !!

I’ve gotta be so careful at the sleepover tonight though, I’m not gonna restrict as much I don’t think because the last time I did they clocked that shit immediately but I’m gonna try stay under my BMR and then when I get back I’m gonna fast.

Wish me luck y’all !!

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I’ve done almost everything to debloat today if I don’t wake up at least a kilo lighter i genuinely may go jump in front of a bus

My tight pants feel a little looser than the last time I wore them, even though my fatass binged last night and now I’m all bloated.

Had a little binge last night so I’m sadly out of the BMI 17 range and back up to 52.1kg, to be honest though it could be worse and I’m fairly confident in the fact that if I just restrict/exercise today and take a shit ton of laxatives I’ll be back into the 51kg range by tomorrow.

I think my scales broken or something cause I weighed myself this morning and it said I’m 51.8kg but istg I look fatter than I did a couple days ago when I weighed the same amount before I binged.

Honestly so excited for school starting tomorrow, I love the routine and it gives me something to do and think about besides my disordered eating :)

Why the fuck didn’t I just go to sleep I had a mini binge on fucking noodles and mini Easter eggs now I’m at roughly 800 cals for the day and I just want more

Yall update on the hot cross bun situation, it was so disappointing I should’ve gotten a different one because this one tasted like ass it literally just tasted like a regular brioche bun and I regret OMAD’ing it 😔💔