My Dad Came Back Home Just To Sit In The Table I Was Studyng At, While He Was In A Videocall Talking

I want blood running thru my arms

Relapsing be like:

"we went out just your dad and i, and your brother because he just came from work" ok??? Wake me up then ???

Never forgetting how i once said i wanted to take my organs out to stop feeling psychological pain and then stopped and said "ok i think im over reacting"

*screaming crying almost having a panic attack* i think im over reacting

Psiquiatra cabrón "most patients have symptoms since they're young" okay then ASK ME ask me how i was as a child and you'll see I've been sick since. I don't think it's normal the way I've been living since i was a teenager. Meds have helped me, but i keep feeling this emptiness and paranoia. I'm getting crazier by the minute.

Yall gon think i'm crazy but i'm madly in love, enough to learn the language of a country ive never been to, enough to plan to get out of my own country. Just because i'm in love ajsidjskdj

If I binge is a sin to god, but not for my mom

If I fast is a sin to my mom, but not for god

Ana's hell is waiting for me):

Goodnight

I ate way too much today.. Easter weekend… oh man…

While kids still do those weird trends, and I'm still around, you'll never miss them

I love you a lot

I've realized that i am indeed, falling for her. With everything: pain, fear and terror, I'm falling in love again.

I keep repeating the same memory «here's your sweater and... Look what i got». Her holding yellow flowers. She looked so pretty, the way she smiles at me. It's so amazing i can't even describe it.

I just can't get myself together, how is this happening to me again? How did i not notice? I did see the signs. Me staring and smiling like an idiot, i always want to see her and kiss her and... Oh god, i am falling.

She's so special, it feels like she's the voice of calm and reason every time i lose my senses. I love how she's always around, i adore and crave her touch.

I need to write a letter.

My blog is for:

Coping with my mental stuff

Getting my disordered thoughts out of me and not letting them eat me up inside

Seeing other ppl with similar issues to not feel so alone, possibly making friends with them so they don’t feel so alone

Making me not feel so crappy

My blog isn’t for:

× For promoting mental disorders

× Promoting self harm

× Putting others down

× Telling others to do what I do