Lilly: Jake Isn’t Answering Their Phone

Lilly: Jake isn’t answering their phone

MC: I’ll call

Lilly: Cleo and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-

Jake: Hello?

More Posts from Imconfusingmyself and Others

2 years ago

Dr. Crow: Where's our patients ?

J.K. Night: We're playing hide and seek.

Dr. Crow: Where?

J.K. Night: I don't think you get how this game works.


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3 years ago

MC: On a scale from “damn Daniel” to “fre sha vaca do”, how are you feeling?

Richy: In between “it’s an avocado, thanks” and “how did you defeat Captain America”, but as a solid answer I would say “I don’t need a degree to be a clothing hanger”. How about you, Dan?

Dan: Probably “road work ahead”.

Cleo: I speak many languages, and this is none of them.


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2 years ago

MC: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?

Cleo: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.

MC: Three of us saw it, Cleo. How do you explain that?

Cleo: *points at Jake* Sleep deprivation. *points at Jessy* Paranoia. *points at Thomas* Delusional personality disorder.


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3 years ago

MC: Please, I'm begging you to stay at the hospital.

Dan: I'm sorry, are these OUR broken legs? Stay out of it.


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3 years ago

Jake: You really put away everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?

Thomas: Several traffic violations.

Dan: Three counts of resisting arrest.

Jessy: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.

MC: Also, that's not our car.


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2 years ago

Jake: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I’ll wait.

MC: You and me!

Jake, tearing up: Okay.

2 years ago

Hannah: Why are Jake and MC sitting with their backs to each other?

Jessy: They had a fight.

Hannah: Then why are they holding hands?

Jessy: They get sad when they fight.


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3 years ago

Julius: You fuckers don’t know about my knife stick. It’s a knife taped to a stick and it’s the ultimate weapon.

Bernd, not looking up from his book: Spear.

Julius: BLOCKED.


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2 years ago

Jake: Not trying to brag or anything, but I can wake up without an alarm clock now simply due to my crippling and overwhelming anxiety, so...


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2 years ago

Julius: I CAN'T DO IT!

MC, having a crisis: I CAN'T EITHER!

Julius: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE

Tim: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US.

Julius:

Julius: I appreciate it,

Julius: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH-

Bernd: Julius-

Julius: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE!

Lucy: Julius we gotta-

Julius: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT.

Julius: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?'

Julius, motioning to Mr. Crow and J.K. Night: NOT FUCKING THIS


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