The Age-old Discussion As To Whether Or Not Ben Barnes Was Poor Casting For Dorian Gray Is Incredibly

Sometimes it is the people no one imagines anything of who do the things that no one can imagine

Joan Clarke

‘Demian’ by Hermann Hesse - Book Review

Genre: Psychological/Spiritual

Rating: 4/5

Summary: When Sinclair, as a child, first experiences the dark side of the world apart from the bright side he grew up in, he realizes there must exist a balance between the two worlds in his life.

My Opinion: This book literally got me hooked since the first chapter. The writing style is so breathtaking that I had to stop reading from time to time. The first chapter called us all out. How can we call ourselves the people of light when we sleep peacefully at night knowing that our neighbors are out there, suffering in the dark? Throughout the whole book, the aspects of the world and humans are all divided into the two worlds; that is the ‘bright world’ and the ‘dark world’. But of course, one cannot exist without the other. With this mindset, the writer had presented a beautiful coming-of-age story. Another point I noticed worth mentioning is that the learning process from one’s inner self other than what the world has to offer. This way, we can grow as a person with full freedom. Even though there were things which were a little obscure to me, I still enjoyed most of the book. It had taught me things about myself which I was too afraid to admit. Somehow, I found this book to be a life-saver. I still think it is not for everyone though. Some people might find it a little disturbing while others might fail to connect to the moral concepts of it.

Confession Time: I would have probably never read this if I didn’t know that the ‘Wings’ album of BTS was based off this book. And I’m glad that I did because it is one of my favorite albums by them. Being a person who likes to interpret double meanings and metaphors in arts, I found the references of this book throughout their music videos, short films and songs really amusing.

Characterization: I loved the characterization of Sinclair. But about Max Demian, I’m not a hundred percent sure. Sinclair is a relatable character. I, too, can relate to him in terms of his way of distinguishing the good and evil. Another thing about Sinclair I also find in myself is that he’s a bit pathetic. One way or the other, he is always clinging onto someone, be it his parents from the ‘bright world’ or his friends from the ‘dark one’. I loved the fact that when he found himself surrounded by complete despair and evil, it was love that had drawn him back into the world. I loved the author’s way of describing Max Demian, His appearance was so appealing and haunting at the same time. It totally suited the character that he represented.

Quote: “If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us.”

I’m Back...

I am attending my last exam tomorrow. Soon, I’ll be posting regularly again. At least, I hope so...

These are what you’re gonna get before long:

The last part of ‘My Guardian Angel’

Fast updates on the series ‘Noona! Please! Help!’

Slow updates on the series ‘The Other Side’

Personal review on Jin’s single ‘The Astronaut’

Short drabbles, if I have the time and mood

I wuv U 💜

Fandom: BTS

Pairing: Jungkook x Female Reader

💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖

I woke up in the middle of the night by the sound coming from my living room. The culprit was no other than Jungkook, who had been singing karaoke with much pleasure as I could sense from his voice. I checked my phone and found that it was 3 o'clock.

I have a habit of not being able to go back to sleep once I'm awake in the middle of the night. And I'm pretty sure Jungkook was aware of it. Thinking of giving him a good scolding, I walked to the living room only to find the mess he had created.

At least four cans of beer lay all around the floor. He was drinking from his glass very excitedly, his hair completely disheveled. Hearing me enter the room, he looked up and flashed a bunny smile.

Of course, I couldn't bring myself to say anything mean.

"Come here!" he mumbled like a baby.

I dragged myself forward and sat down beside him. Immediately, he hugged me by my neck and placed a soft kiss on my cheek. I could smell beer from his breath.

"What are you doing this late?" I asked.

Jungkook blinked at me innocently, "Did I wake you up, sweetheart?" I pouted and nodded my head sorrowfully to let him know what he did. To which, Jungkook gasped dramatically and clapped his hands to his mouth.

He spoke with remorse, "I'm so sorry, baby. I swear I didn't mean to. I only wanted to have some drinks. And suddenly I felt like singing. I forgot that you were already asleep. What time is it?"

"It's 3 in the morning!" I informed.

"Okay, baby! I'll stop now." He tried to get up but I pulled him back into the couch.

"No. Stay. And sing!" I requested, "for me."

He smiled mischievously and said, "I wuv U." He then turned on the music to sing, while I rested my head on his shoulder and ran my hand through his sexy messy hair.

💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖💜💖

Note: I had to write something down since I watched his late night live. Jungkook has no idea what he does to me...

My Masterlist

If you receive this, you make somebody happy! Go on anon and send this to ten of your followers who make you happy or somebody you think needs cheering up. If you get one back, even better! 💕💕

Good to know I am making someone happy, even if it's only by a fraction. It means a lot. Thanks anon...💜

List of Fandoms

I love to write. Feel free to ask me anything: imagines, one shots, shipping, fan fiction etc. The fandoms I write about are:

Harry Potter

Marvel

DC

The Maze Runner

The Riot Club

Stephen King’s IT

Riverdale

I’ll add more to my list later, maybe.

Almost

Fandom: BTS Pairing: Jungkook x OC (Jessie) Genre: Angst and a little bit of fluff Warning: Possessive behavior, underage drinking, heartbreak etc. Word Count: 1.8k words

‘Almost’, the most depressing word in my dictionary. If you want to know the reason behind it, we’ll have to go back in time.

Our grade 1 teacher had suggested to fix our seats alphabetically. That didn’t sound bad to me. Because Jungkook and I were the only students with the initial J for our names. Or at least that was what I thought.

“Jessie” my teacher called me to seat at the very back of the first row. I smiled at Jungkook and went over to take my seat.

“John” the teacher called next.

“Who the hell is John?” I thought while the new boy in our class came to sit beside me.

“Now Jungkook would sit at the very front of the second row” the teacher announced.

Jungkook went to his assigned seat and looked back for a moment to catch my eyes. It was a signal for me to persuade the teacher to let us sit together.

I knew I had to do it. Because Jungkook would rather die than argue with the teacher on any matter. I, on the other hand, searched for every single chance to contradict my teachers. It was something I found really amusing.

As soon as I put forward my request, our teacher replied with, “Who would complain on such a peaceful organization of the seats other than you?”

The other students started to laugh. As much as I can recall, we had some minutes of argument when finally the teacher said, “Alright! Let’s ask Jungkook on what he has to say about it.”

Then he turned to Jungkook and asked, “Do you want to go over to the back to sit with her? Or are you happy with my decision?”

Jungkook nodded his head and said, “I’m fine, here” like a complete idiot.

I remembered how his reply had hurt my pride and since then I had never sat beside him in any class, not even when we had gone to the high school. We were almost going to sit together for a whole year and more to come. But no!

None of us would introduce the other as the best friend. Nonetheless we had the closest bond than any best friends’ duo of our class. In fact, we were more than friends. We knew it and so did everyone else.

Some people couldn’t understand how we ended up together while others would say, “opposite attracts.”

We were totally opposite in terms of our personalities. I was wild, adventurous and free-spirited while Jungkook was shy, introverted and conserved. But these were merely what appeared on the outside. I believed him to be more like me spiritually. He just had been taming the animal within himself.

Perhaps I was the only one who could see that. Whatever it was, nobody would deny the fact that we were surely an unusual couple.

The next incident also happened at the farewell party of our Elementary School. I was talking with a bunch of boys and joking around.

I knew Jungkook would not join us since he didn't like the crowds. So I didn't bother calling him either.

The party was over and we were walking home together. Suddenly he said, "I didn't like seeing you there." he paused for a moment and added, "With THEM."

I laughed, "What are you talking about?"

"You know exactly what I am talking about"

"Okay, I understand." I said. "You were probably lonely in there. But hey! We are going to the same High School. But some of the boys are leaving the town. I will get to meet you anytime I want. But not them."

"Whatever!" Jungkook sighed in exasperation.

"Why are you making such a huge deal out of it?"

"Because, I don't want to share you with anyone."

"Why?" I asked, rather shocked.

"Because you're my..." Then he abruptly stopped.

I stopped walking. "What?" I urged him to continue.

Jungkook went red on the face but didn't say anything further.

"For God's sake, Jungkook, just say it." I wished to myself.

"Let's hurry!" He said, "We’re already late."

And that was it. Jungkook almost called me his girlfriend. If only he really did, I would have gladly accepted that. Perhaps then, our relationship could have gotten a tag.

We were only 13 back then. I had sneaked a bottle of whiskey from the kitchen cabinet where my father usually kept them. I was always curious about adult drinking that I wanted to try it myself. But doing something this big alone didn’t sound exciting at all.

Of course, I had told Jungkook earlier to sneak out of his house at midnight to meet me at the little junkyard. Reluctantly he had agreed. He actually showed up even though I doubted that he would.

“Guess what I have with me?” I asked him.

“Umm…” he went on to his usual loading mood.

I didn’t have any patience left so I showed him the bottle right away. Jungkook gasped as soon as he saw it. His reaction made me feel more proud of myself for accomplishing the task.

Jungkook tried to persuade me not to drink it. But it was hopeless as I was too determined. As soon as I sipped directly from the bottle I spited it out.

“Yuck!” I shouted, “How can people enjoy drinking this thing?”

Jungkook started to giggle at my reaction. I wasn’t feeling confident anymore. I had to try something else to prove that I was braver than him.

“Stop laughing!” I said boldly, “as if you’ve ever done anything fun in your life before.”

“You didn’t do anything to boast about either.” He said as a matter of fact. "You’re all talk.”

“Who said that? I’ve done quite a lot of things.”

“Like?” he was mocking me at that point.

I quickly tried to make up a lie to get away from the embarrassing situation, “Like I already had my first kiss?”

“What?”

The shock on his face was satisfying. So, I continued, “Yeah, of course, dummy.”

Jungkook frowned and asked, “Who was it?”

“Why would I tell YOU?” I started to tease him now, “I bet you have no idea about these stuffs anyway.”

“I don’t believe you.” He said.

I walked closer to him and said, “Why? Do you want me to prove it?” Jungkook took a step back and I started to laugh.

“I know about these stuffs as much as you do, okay?” he tried to argue.

“Then prove it.” I said in a very serious voice.

Jungkook remained quiet. I slowly walked toward him. He took two steps back causing him to be pinned to the nearby broken car. I rested one of my hand on the car to his left.

Through the moonlight, in the otherwise dark night, I could see Jungkook’s face clearly now. He had shut his eyes closed. I leaned to close the distance between our faces. Our chests were already touching and I could feel his heart beating fast. His trembling lips were parted a little.

I was almost within the reach to feel his breath on my lips, when I realized, he might be frightened. And I moved away. Jungkook opened his eyes and looked at me in confusion.

“I lied,” I said, “I never kissed anyone before.”

I’d had enough. I wanted to get rid of this unestablished relationship I was in with Jungkook. I finally decided I would ask him to be my boyfriend. I had even saved enough money to buy him a nice watch once we were official.

“I have something to tell you.” I said as soon as we met.

“Me too.” Jungkook replied.

“Okay, I'll let you go first.” I was shocked at his calm voice, “Mine can wait.”

Jungkook bent his head down and he said, “I've got accepted.”

“What?”

“You remember about the audition, right?”

“Oh yeah, right!” I said, remembering, “The audition. So, what now?”

“They had called me to sign the contract and go stay in Seoul.”

I didn't know what to say. I never really thought about what was going to happen if he got accepted by the company.

I asked hopefully, “But you'll come back again right?”

Jungkook was too quiet. Something felt wrong. That time, I knew it was the end. He was never coming back to me. A new life awaited him. How could I stop him now?

I smiled, "I knew you would do well."

“But I don't want to go away.”

I could see tears were forming in his eyes. My own tears threatened me to burst out at any time. I still managed to hold it back and said, “What are you talking about? It's a life changing opportunity.”

Jungkook wiped away the tear that just fell from one of his eyes. He slowly nodded his head. He understood.

“Jessie!” he called.

“Hmm?”

“Didn't you want to say something earlier?” he asked.

“Yeah.” I said, “I want to buy you a watch. Consider it as a goodbye gift.”

That’s how our story ended with yet another almost. It could have gone differently. If only I could bring myself to ask him to be mine, could he refuse? Didn't he loved me enough to leave behind everything to be with me? Apparently I never found out.

It had been ten long years. By the time, I had witnessed Jungkook growing up little by little on screen. I had been his number one fan since day one. He along with his group had gone so far now.

I was really grateful to all of his hyungs, who had been there for Jungkook all these years. They had made him who he was today. They had helped him to grow and come out of his shell. I was more than just proud of him.

My life had been different than what I had imagined it would be like. Nonetheless I was doing okay. However, one day, something really unexpected occur.

I saw Jungkook for the first time in ten years. He had come to the store I work in to buy his all-time favorite banana milkshake. He was wearing a cap to hide his face, so that no one could recognize him at a first glance. But how could I not? He was my first, if not last, love.

I was a little shocked when he put the milkshake in front of the counter. Our eyes met for a split second. Jungkook quickly looked away and handed me the cash and said, “Keep the change.” Then, he was gone.

He didn’t recognize me. I doubted he would have. I had shorter hair than him, too many piercings on my ears and nose, tattoos on my arms, neck and even face.

Life almost gave me a chance to be reunited with my Jungkook, only to snatch that hope away in the end.

My Masterlist

‘Great Expectations’ by Charles Dickens Book Review

Rating: 5/5

Genre: Romance/Mystery

Summary: Narrated fully in first person, the story follows a young orphan boy called Pip, who lives with his sister and her blacksmith husband, Joe. Pip has no expectation for his future but to become a blacksmith and live a common life. But when he is asked to visit a wealthy woman, Miss Havisham, to play with her daughter, Estella, Pip’s life turns upside down. By the day, Estella makes Pip feel more course and common. The only thing Pip wants now is to become a gentleman and be worthy of Estella.

My opinion: If you are a classic lover this book is a must read for you. Even if you are not, you still need to try reading this epic story. One of my favourite classics ever, ‘Great Expectation’ is Dickens’s one of the bests. The story is very intense. There are places where you cannot help but laugh, as well as places where your heart will break.

I can relate myself in a lot of way with Pip as he finds truth about himself along the story. What makes a man wants more? What is the reward in being content? These questions are beautifully answered.

More than one and a half century old, this story depicts the social situation of that time perfectly. Class discrimination is a vital part of this novel. Charles Dickens is famous for his presentation of human behaviour in an authentic way. As a result, each character is well developed and real.

Favourite character: Miss Havisham, one of the most gothic characters in literature, is my favourite person from the novel. Her appearance was very interesting. Her house were decorated like a wedding which took place a long time ago and she wore the same dress literally all the time. Not a single object was moved in her house and it looked like as if it was stuck in time forever.

Miss Havisham was a very complicated character and not without flaws, which made her more real. She was cold on the outside but I feel like there was still some warmth left in her heart somewhere.

Quote: “Throughout life, our worst weaknesses and meannesses are usually committed for the sake of the people whom we most despise.”

jimin and taehyung are only two months apart but jimin sounds like hes 12 and taehyung sounds like he’s gone through puberty twice and this is why i have trust issues 

TV series I've watched in March 2022

The End of the F***ing World - Season 1 & 2 (2017-19)

- Check my previous review of season 1 here

- The season 2 will always be memorable to me because I've binge watched it with my cousin. We talked about it the whole day. I know, whenever I'll watch it again, I'll miss those moments.

- Season 2 also had some serious issues dealt with just like season 1. Bonnie's character hit close to home. I want to hug her. I also want to hug Alyssa and James. They've been through a lot.

Sweet Tooth (2021)

- A world slipped into chaos as a contagious virus breaks through and babies are born as part animals.

- This is the perfect time to watch this show with your family. It is quite emotional.

Our Planet (2019)

- From the grassland to the forest, from the ice covered world to the hot desert, from the fresh water to the high sea, this series shows varieties of habitats of the living beings of our beloved earth.

- This nature documentary is quite different than any other I've ever seen. It discusses the climate change in a way to make people actually worry about the situation. I highly recommend it to all of my followers.

- You may feel like to cry if you're an animal lover.

Strangers From Hell (2018)

- A small town boy moves to a residence of the city where he encounters many creepy strangers.

- I've never imagined this series would be that much deep. It is very detailed and the work is a piece of art. One of the best kdramas out there.

- It's very gruesome and violent. Definitely not going to recommend it to the faint hearted people.

- To be honest it gave me nightmares. I couldn't sleep properly at night for a whole week and only slept at daytime. My mind was totally wrecked.

The Tale of the Nine Tailed (2020)

- A nine tailed fox leaves his position as a forest deity to search for his reincarnated love.

- Though it is a fantasy and romance series, I mostly enjoyed the interaction between the gumiho brothers. And to be honest, I love Lee Rang <3

- Another best part of the series is the mentions of all the different sorts of mythical creatures. I love to know about mythologies of different countries.

Persona (2019)

- An anthology of short films with metaphorical meanings.

- Apart from the fact that each episode was directed by different directors with the same lead actress I don't want to say much about it. Watch it to find out. It's great BTW.