I Have Like 7 Different Laughs And They’re All Ugly

Kryoz: Why do I feel terrible?

Smii7y: Maybe because coffee is not a meal? Eat a vegetable. Sleep.

Kryoz: Guess we'll never know.

Smii7y: Oh my god.

How to tell if fruits and veggies are ripe

Some clips of Kryoz’s laugh cause it’s amazing

me: [vibrating slightly because I had too much caffeine] everything in the world is my fault

Funny Morning Commute Story:

A portly petite lady gets on the train. There’s an empty seat, but the dude next to it has man-spread so there’s little space to actually sit. The lady is undaunted, she says loudly “I think I will have a sit” as a warning and then squeezes herself in. The man does not attempt to reign in his man-spread.

The guy gets off on a next stop, and I’m not really paying attention to them anymore, except I hear the word “man-spread” so I instantly perk-up and look over. And then she says loudly:

“I’m sorry, but if you have such a great need to air out your balls, you need to be checked out for venereal diseases.” 

At some point during that sentence we make eye-contact and I must have a look on my face like I’m five and excited that I just heard a parent swear. Because she laughs, while I grin, because she knows I know what she’s talking about.

And that just made my morning like 10x better.

Daithi: I’m going to the store, you guys want anything?

Terroriser: to never do the Arnold voice again

Mini: the will to live back

Vanoss: Some peace and quiet

Daithi:

Daithi: Yeah, I’ve got like $12

That’s how people live.

Fuckboy Deadpool stans: *identify with Deadpool as some sort of outlet of their insecure masculinity/heterosexuality and rebellion against “PC” culture*

Ryan Reynolds: *reaffirms Deadpool as pansexual literally every chance he gets, wants Deadpool to have a boyfriend in the film franchise, makes Deadpool act campy and effeminate as fuck in the movies, does a charity campaign for cancer where Deadpool dresses in pink and sits next to a pillow that literally says “feminist” on it, goes out of his way to hire a woman of color to portray the female lead in Deadpool 2, literally hires Celine Dion to write a Titanic-esque power ballad for the Deadpool 2 soundtrack and makes a music video where Deadpool prances around in high heels feeling his fantasy like the gayest gay that ever gayed*

Fuckboi Deadpool stans: 

if you dissociate hard enough you can eavesdrop on conversations you’re a part of

Pros of writing gay relationships: 

- gay

Cons of writing gay relationships:

- they both have THE SAME FCKIN PRONOUNS SO I CONSTANTLY HAVE TO NAME BOTH CHARACTERS BECAUSE OTHERWISE IT’S IMPOSSIBLE TO TELL WHO’S DOING WHAT OR WHO’S SPEAKING WHO WILL SAVE ME FROM THIS HELL