Okay I Know The Bible Is Basically A Shared Google Doc Turned Into A Tumblr Shitpost, But Can We Start

1 note = 1 pixel for your fandom’s symbol (shown above) in an art piece I'm making

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Them!

Ukraine: How are you ever going to marry someone nice like America?

Russia: Which one is it? Marry someone nice or someone like America?

America: If you were my husband, I would put poison in your coffee.

Russia: If you were my husband, I’d drink it.

Resolution Progress

France: This year, I promise to be less of a slut.

Russia: That’s the same thing you said last year.

France: No, but I have progress! Last year, I can fit seven fireworks in my ass, but now, I can only fit four!

England, shaking: How the bloody fuck did you measure that?

Choose your fighter

from gay semiotics (1977) by hal fischer

Ayyy just an ace girl I drew

My mom: If you ever get a boyfriend, and need birth control, or get pregnant or anything, let me know. It'll take me a while to accept it, but I love you and will support you through anything

Me: *maniacal gay laughter* I have deceived you all

This life is a monotonous cycle of suffering. I arise each morning exhausted to spend the day with unpleasant company doing unpleasant work. I return home only to suffer through more numbing work, and it matters not whether I have the time to enjoy myself, for I am too tired to do much more. It repeats day after day, week after week, with only a small pause, a brief reprieve, to give me a taste of what I cannot have. A taunting, teasing, reprieve. Not long enough to offer me the salvation I long for, only just enough to keep me going. Keeping me trapped in the cycle, keeping me conscious through the punishment.

Note to vacationing non-Americans: while it’s true that America doesn’t always have the best food culture, the food in our restaurants is really not representative of what most of us eat at home.  The portions at Cheesecake Factory or IHOP are meant to be indulgent, not just “what Americans are used to.”

If you eat at a regular American household, during a regular meal where they’re not going out of their way to impress guests, you probably will not be served twelve pounds of chocolate-covered cream cheese.  Please bear this in mind before writing yet another “omg I can’t believe American food” post.

Okay I drew a quick sketch of Nyo Molossia bc honestly what a babey