I'm Late But Good Evening! 👋🏻👋🏻👋🏻

Lmfao I'm so sorry they got you involved with that they swore we were being mean ☠️

Just had some kid message me about being allegedly bullied by some of my followers, I blocked him.

Here's why: Number one: I'm not sure what happened. Number two: I'll never understand why some people think that just because they're having drama with followers of another person, that the person they're following is automatically involved or responsible for the others' behavior. I am not a parent. I am not part of the tumblr team. Half of my followers are obviously adults and I don't have any more authority than the next person to stop or encourage other people's behavior. I am busy running a factory - not a daycare, I don't get involved with petty online drama that doesn't concern me, even if the people involved are friends or followers. There's no point in messaging me about matters that have nothing to do with my factory or me personally. There are block and report options for a reason. Use them.

I hate having to post this, I'm terribly sorry. That just annoyed the living daylights out of me. Just as I was enjoying a nice glass of wine and-ugh. I digress.

Now back to your regularly scheduled program. Good evening.

- Willy Wonka 🍫

I just wanna see your bedroom pweaseee mister wonka 😔😢

I normally wouldn't allow my privacy to be intruded on, but since you said please and my room is in order today, I will this once.

Before you ask, the walls are not made of chocolate, they are designed to LOOK like chocolate. Otherwise it would melt and collapse and that would be terrible to wake up to. Haha!

Hi Mr. Wonka. If I in any way made you or your oompa loompas uncomfortable at the last barbeque, I sincerely apologize. I did not think I would get drunk ~

That's just the problem, Alice. You don't think. You spilled heavens knows what on my new tailored coat, vomited on poor Edward, kicked an Oompa Loompa while trying to, as you said, "tear up the dance floor", and tripped and fell into the dessert table. You made a fool of yourself and ruined the party for everyone at the same time. Next time please be more considerate of your guests before popping out a big bottle of the some ol' trippy chug-a-lug.

Oh, I almost forgot. You're banned from the factory as well, by the way. I can't have you endangering my Oompa Loompas or destroying everything, now can I? And I will be billing you my Oompa Loompa's hospital bill. Yeah. Use this as a lesson to be more responsible. Hmph.

Are you and that cocoa bean girl dating?

My Cocoa Bean? Uh, no, we're just um...whatever you call it when two people enjoy each other's company. That.

What made you think we were-nevermind.

It's slave labor cause the oompa loompas were taken out of their country and now working for you, you know that right??

Of course not! Don't be ridiculous. It's only slave labor when you're taken forcefully and forced to work against your will for no wages. That goes against my code. The Oompa Loompas agreed to come work in the factory because they would be living in better conditions and would have their precious cocoa beans in trade for their work. It was a business agreement, which is the same as a verbal contract. How you could imply such a nonsensical accusation with so much confidence and very little knowledge is entirely beyond me.

😆😆😆😆

The shade you be throwing at Alice, Mike, and Augustus on here and the way you be responding to your dad in the comments be KILLING MEEEE LMFAO YALL FUNNY AF 😭😭😭😭

And when mad hatter was yelling at you and Edward through your asks and you were like "oh..." I died. And Some girl said you get her wet and your dad said he hope they ain't a minor, please come get your dad. It's the chaos for me 💀💀💀

You know what they say, if you don't like my shade then step out of my shadow. That Alice is something, though. A drunk. Hmph.

As for my dad, unfortunately there isn't much I can do to deter his behavior.

Knew it lol

Aaaaaaand she does like you

So I've heard.

But grandpa joe said he worked for you 20 yrs ago

Yes, and 20 years ago I would've been 22, when he was working at my store on Cherry Street.

Y'all DEAD wrong for clowning @wonkasseur like that 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Well, maybe they shouldn't have responded if they have sensitive feelings because no one was talking to them. They don't even know what gender they are and they're 30 years old reblogging children's posts. Sometimes a few good jabs to the gut can be enough to shut people up. Don't act like a clown and nobody will clown you.

Lmfao

I used a app that changes your face and when I used your face it changed my face to a girl. The app thinks you're a woman and put lipstick on my face because your lips are really pink it had me laughing so fucking hard. This is proof you're a pretty ass sexy delicious but feminine man. That's all I had to say love u bye sugar 😂😂😂😂😂😂

That-....

Well maybe your app is just crappy and it confuses features and gender often, more than you think. ....S'not my fault you got a two star crappy app. 😒