It’s A Lovely Feeling When It All Comes Together In Your Favour. There Is Light At The End Of The Tunnel,

2/5/19

I get a fizzing feeling all over when I solve a puzzle :)

Or it may be a heart attack brought on by the fact that’s it’s flipping May already!

We all forget things.

So today I was meant to give a presentation in front of my chemistry class, but I completely forgot and didn’t prepare anything. I was mortified when my name was called and I told her, “But I can’t - I’ve literally not prepared for this at all!” The room went silent and I felt so awful in that moment.

My chemistry teacher said, “I will see you outside.” And I thought I would get a bollocking. As soon as I got outside, I broke down crying, annoyed at myself because I never do things like that. I wanted to show her how on it I am and how well I can rise to challenges like public speaking, but instead I failed to follow a simple instruction and humiliated myself in front of the class.

So I went outside, ready to go on the defensive about why I should not be made to present. My teacher gave me the biggest hug and told me that I am only human - which is why she would let me do my presentation next week and just in front of her. She reminded me not to be so cruel and hard on myself, because I do that. I beat myself up over little things.

She told me that I have so much on my plate right now with university stuff as well as upcoming mocks that I should allow myself to be forgetful once in a while.

She told me that she is usually the most organised person ever but she forgets to bring stuff to the right lessons all the time.

She told me she doesn’t hate me, isn’t disappointed in me and all she wants is for me to stop stressing. And then she told me to go to the toilets and wash my face while she told the rest of the class not to talk about it.

My point is, it’s okay to skip a beat and forget something. It’s okay to admit you are only human.

And I am blessed to have a teacher who genuinely cares. How many people can say the same nowadays?

Good morning, sunshine!

My eyes snapped open at 7:30am so I figured I’d have a wash, stretch out my aching muscles and do some maths. After this I’ll go and grab some breakfast :)

It’s finally half term so the pressure is momentarily off and I can catch up on all my outstanding tasks.

I feel like I’ve achieved a lot in the past couple of hours I’ve been up!

Have an amazing day!

30/09/2020 Year 2 commences!

Rant incoming! I’m so tired. It’s been half a week and I’ve had so much work thrown at me. I’ve just moved into my second year house and am still finding my feet; I’ve got work from 5 modules on the go at the same time; there’s Zoom calls left, right and centre; and a ton of short deadlines. I’m trying to keep my chin up because the content is actually very interesting - it’s just very intense!

Anyway, have some proton NMR notes and remember to drink some water :)

Say it louder for the people at the back!

Just a reminder, but you do not need to “earn” being tired.

You’re allowed to be tired, even if you haven’t “done” anything and you’re allowed to be tired even if you did less than someone else.

Being tired is a normal thing your body does for a whole plethora of reasons, and is a basic bodily function. You don’t need to “earn” basic bodily functions, no matter what anyone else tells you.

The vermillion Mildliner is my favourite colour right now. Channelling those autumn vibes (despite the fact it’s still technically summer) 🍁

The Cambridge bottle reminds me of my ultimate goal at this point in my life. Let’s go get it!

3-8/12/18 - 84-89/100 days of productivity

Omg life is so hectic right now - sorry for no posts for ages! So I have had my Cambridge interviews (I think they went... ok?) and am now revising for mocks beginning on Monday morning with German!

I’m at my friend’s house doing some Quizlets of new vocab :)

10/10/18 - 28/100 days of productivity

Two days in one

Today has been mad but fun. My lovely biology teacher lent me her old uni textbook because she knows I’m a massive genetics nerd. I can’t wait to get stuck in!

I’m making good progress with maths and am hoping to get some more pure done this evening, as well as lots of stats and mechanics. I started A2 stats and mechanics yesterday, which wasn’t awful. Everyone in classes moan they hate moments, but I find them okay!

I had my weekly Doppeldeutsch lesson with my favourite teacher and we had a lot of fun all round finishing watching The Reader.

09/10/18 - 27/100 days of productivity

Sorry I forgot to post! I fell asleep haha

I did loads of maths in my free, so I dedicated at least an hour to each subject. I’m very happy with my progress so far!

Wow, my feed is getting awfully specific 😳

i feel like the most important piece of wisdom i can impart on teenagers is that no one–no one–knows what the fuck they’re doing

my brother is 26 years old, makes $200k a year, and just bought a house with his fiance. he’s the success story you hear about but never actually meet in person, but it all happened by accident. he wanted to go to college for clarinet performance, but he got rejected from all the top schools. so he decided to major in physics instead, and then went on to get a doctorate to put off being an adult for a few more years. but then he ended up dropping out halfway through the program and accepting a job with google as a software engineer. so to reiterate: my brother majored in something he was not interested in, and then he got a job that had nothing to do with his degree. 

he isn’t successful because he had some master plan he followed, he just stumbled around blindly until something worked out. and that’s what we’re all doing–i majored in political science and now i do customer service for a company that makes industrial-sized gas detection monitors. the marketing director at my company has a degree in biology, and my mom has an MBA and works at a middle school.  no one knows what they’re doing, we’re all just trying different things until something works out.

so if you don’t have a plan, that’s fine. most of us don’t. and even those of us who do, don’t usually end up doing the thing they thought they would. it’s okay to relax and let life carry you wherever it’s gonna carry you. because even though a lot of us don’t end up doing the thing we wanted, most of us end up happy anyway.