'Til I Can Hear It Crack

i’m not a “twink”, i’m a freak of nature

some bastard is on my fav anxiety attack staircase

i miss getting scam calls and messages from actual people. i used to be able to pretend to be a deeply confused lonely old man, now its all robots. who will jerry talk to now...

dragon melting glass in its mouth and blowing bubbles with it

save a spaceship, ride an astrophysisist

i do not care at all about oh&s in a lab but i do care about it in the kitchen. sure i'll wear sandals when handling dangerous chemicals why not. when lighting a bunsen burner ill put out matches on my tongue. i am running in the lab with beakers. TURN YOUR FUCKING POT HANDLES INWARD. DO NOT LEAVE KNIVES IN OPAQUE CLEANING WATER. CLEAN EVERYTHING THOROUGHLY OR GET OUT OF MY DAMN KITCHEN. the exception is that i love to play with knives and if i get bored waiting for water to boil i will start playing the knife game.

Why don't you start an only fans and sell pictures of you eating horses? People are into that

bc i dont eat horses????

having adhd is all fun and games until you forget to eat because you are too busy sharpening your axe

my personal enemy and my dentist (seperate people)

Fuck personality tests. Who comes to your mind when I say “Michael”

hey what about the cool things you know /genq

thank you so much for asking!!! i couldn’t decide what one to say so here’s three cool things i know

1. silphium is the name of an ancestor of the modern vegetable, fennel. it was used as a birth-control in ancient rome, but was driven to extinction, mostly due to being grazed upon by livestock. you also may hear some claims that it was a perfect magical side-effect free wonder-plant, but that’s just speculation and should not be taken as accurate. it’s still really cool to me though, it was so important to the time that it appeared on coins like this one ⬇️

2. the slow loris is the only venomous primate. its venom is a combination of the the more mild venom in its saliva and the more intense venom that it secretes from its forearms, it licks its forearms to create more intense than either of them. if a slow loris was to bite your hand it would hurt like hell and make your arm go numb, in some cases it has been known to kill, though mostly bc of anaphylactic shock. they also have no tail which makes them look really silly to me, little fella below ⬇️

3. moons of jupiter are named after jupiter/zeus’s children (and/)or lovers. there are 57 named moons (excluding names like “jupiter LIV" bc come on that doesnt count) and 97 confirmed moons in total. you can tell which moons are retrograde bc they end in “e”. prograde moons will end in “a” or “o”. the 4 largest of the moons are called the galilean moons bc galileo observed them, they are the most well known ones. those four are io, callisto, ganymede, and europa. i like europa bc it has a frozen over ocean and was the first one i ever learned about so here’s a picture of that below, mostly to fulfil my desire for consistency ⬇️

also keep in mind this was all of the top of my head, i double checked some things but mostly i was just remembering so take it all with a grain of salt, if something seems incorrect it might be. anyway that’s some cool things :) thanks for asking!!