How Is The „ai Generator“ Ad Allowed On Here Help Pls 😭😭😭

Help me !!! saku said that we will get an Valentine’s Day audio. But I forgot which character… it was Isaac or Xanthus I can’t find the information in the long live stream PLS ANYONE TELL ME !!!

NVM I FOUND IT ITS XANTHAS YAHHHHHHH YIPPPEEEE

WHATTT THE LAST WAS CARZY ??? WE NOW NEED SOME SWWET THINGS !!! Just Isaac being sweet and gentle. Isaac once wanted to train the listener swimming since they can’t swim and he kept his promise. But …. the listener being insecure about there body and embarrassed as they get into the pool. It would be nice if you could make it gender neutral !!!

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫 ♥ 𝘐𝘴𝘢𝘢𝘤

˜”* ❝𝙆𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙄 𝙨𝙖𝙞𝙙 𝙣𝙤 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙄 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤.❞

⎯⎯ ୨ ୧ ⎯⎯

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: ɪꜱᴀᴀᴄ ᴄᴏᴍꜰᴏʀᴛꜱ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ᴛᴇᴀᴄʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴡɪᴍ.

⎯୨⎯ " " ⎯୧⎯

It was the middle of the day and you hadn’t seen Isaac. You thought he’d be somewhere near his study so you didn’t bother him just in case. However, you weren’t afraid to check up on him so you tried knocking on the door to the study. 

Knock, knock, knock. 

Nothing. 

You were about to go for another round of knocks until you felt a tap on your shoulder. 

“Isaac? Why aren’t you working right now?”

“We’re both off today, remember?”

You forgot about last night when Isaac so randomly and so abruptly announced that both of you didn’t have work the next day. In your defense, it was out of nowhere, but still, you felt bad for forgetting. 

“I forgot, sorry.” 

“It’s fine, as long as you weren’t already working too hard. Anyway, I need you to come with me.”

“Why? Did I do something wrong?” You worried a little. 

“No! I have a surprise for you!” 

As you held his hand with your eyes closed (because he told you to), you felt more and more curious. It wasn’t every day that Isaac had a surprise for you. Especially something he’s this excited about. 

“Alright… open.”

You opened your eyes to see swimwear laid out on your bed. 

“Isaac, I told you I can’t swim.” 

“I know, that’s why I’m teaching you!”

It was cute to hear him sound all cute and excited but you weren’t too sure about this. Nonetheless, you agreed to put it on and meet him at the pool.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

You looked at yourself wearing the swimsuit and couldn’t help but feel self-cautious. You tried to see if you could cover up a little bit but spoiler alert, that didn’t work. 

Well, Isaac wouldn’t judge you for your body, right? I mean, it just doesn’t seem like him. But also, it wasn’t just about how he felt, it was also about how you felt. 

You racked up the courage to finally meet Isaac at the pool and get greeted by a splash from him. 

“I didn’t even get in yet!”

He smiled and swam to the edge to help you get in. As he reached his hand out for you to get in, you found yourself hesitating, like a lot. Normally, when it came to him, you didn’t hesitate. Ever. 

His smile turned into a confused frown before he spoke up. 

“Are you alright? If it’s the water that’s bothering you, my hand is here to guide you.”

“No, it’s fine…”

You tried to force yourself into the water but it didn’t work. You couldn’t stop feeling insecure and just gross. You knew you weren’t but at the same time, did you know?

“Something’s wrong. Y/N, tell me.”

You didn’t wanna tell him but you knew you wouldn’t get in the pool if you didn’t. 

“Just um… getting into the water like this, it’s kind of embarrassing.”

He didn’t get it.

“Huh? How so?”

“Isaac, look at me. Wait no, don’t.”

“I’ve been looking at you this whole time and I’m not seeing anything wrong…?”

“I look stupid.”

Oh. Now he got it. Just those 3 words could make anyone get it. 

“Hey, no you don’t. You don’t look stupid at all. Here, tell me what’s going on.” He raises himself out of the pool and sits next to you on the edge. 

“My body doesn’t look weird to you…? I just feel weird with you seeing me like this when I look like-”

“Beautiful. That’s what you look like. And nothing less.”

He places his wet hand on top of yours.

“You don’t look stupid or weird or anything your head is telling you. You’re beautiful and your body is beautiful. Alright?”

You look at him and smile, “Alright.”

You were about to kiss him but before you could, he pulled you into the water.

“Hey! What the hell!”

“Just hold on to me!”

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

a/n: ah first requestttt!!! I AGREE THE LAST ONE WAS INSANEEEE LIKE???? but thank u for requesting and i hope this met your expectations (fingers crossed yall)

I go thinking that i'll write one fanfic and swerve into the vibe of another. I apologise for when I post this I just kinda love the angsty vibes. Hopefully I can get this done by next week. shout out to my mutual Birdy <3 got me into the vibe of writing a Xanthus fic.

now that christmas is over,

fuck all three of these characters they make me throw up inside my mouth

Strictly Business

Isaac asks for a relationship that is entirely professional. You oblige, to both your disappointment.

Isaac Rhoades x Reader

Warnings: talk of insomnia

“I just thought—” you began hesitantly, moving the tray of cinnamon swirls closer to Isaac, prompting him to take a second one. The placating motion did nothing to ease the frown on his face. His hard stare remained fixed on you, annoyed and dismissive. You felt your heart sinking and averted your eyes.

Isaac hummed unbothered as if he couldn’t care less about your request to spend time together — as if he did not care in the slightest to entertain your pathetic longing for human company. “I’m busy, you know,” he said by way of dismissal and pushed the plate of freshly baked cinnamon swirls back towards you. 

After a bit of prying, you had found out that his mother used to make them when he felt sad and — with the anniversary of his parent’s death so recent — you wanted to cheer him up and surprise him with his comfort food. Isaac did not appreciate your efforts, evidently.

You tried to take the blunt rejection of both your company and care for him in stride, but you could not suppress the tight clench of your jaw as your heart squeezed painfully in your chest. “If I overstepped the other day in the garden,” you said slowly, raising your gaze to meet Isaac’s and show him the sincerity of your apology, “I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable in any way. I—”

“It’s fine,” he said curtly, rising from his seat at the table and straightening his tie. “Think nothing of it. It was a lapse of judgment on both parts. We can pretend it never happened.”

“But I actually—”

“No,” Isaac interrupted, holding up a hand to silence you, “our relationship is strictly professional and I intend to keep it that way. I’m sorry, but I am in no way interested in anything more. There is nothing between us. Understand?” 

Isaac’s stare burned into you and you swallowed thickly, hiding how much his words hurt. “I understand,” you said in a tone so calm and drained of feeling it took Isaac aback. 

He blinked in surprise, no longer used to your flat tone and apathetic stare. ‘Sir’ hung unsaid in the air between you. Isaac cleared his throat to break the loaded silence stretching across the house again. 

You got up from your seat, brushing down the front of your clothes. “Well, as you said, my services will not be needed on my day off. I will be in the library should you change your mind,” you said tonelessly, leveling Isaac stoically. 

There was a glint of worry in his eyes, a chip in his armor you could only spot because you had spent many hours with him, paying close attention to his expressions and mannerisms. Isaac looked unsure. His mouth was slightly agape, but whatever he wanted to say was buried a moment later, hidden behind the thick wall of nonchalance and indifference he put up. 

The crack in his mask was sealed, and expressionless eyes met your own.

“Happy reading.”

Isaac thought he knew what loneliness felt like — he had lived in solitude for years now — but no amount spent on his own had prepared him for the heart-wrenching sorrow he felt as you continuously brushed him off, retreating into yourself and being the strict definition of utterly professional. 

He felt hollow, watching you set the table with only one plate for him to eat at alone, hearing your monotonous voice ask him if he would prefer rice or pasta, seeing your lips twist in a polite but ingenuous smile as you greeted him in the mornings, handing him his coffee and disappearing to start on your daily chores. 

There had been no sweets, nor snacks you would prepare for him and shily requested he give you feedback on. There were no little bursts of light throughout his day as your paths crossed and you shot him a smile or playful wink. 

There were no intimate moments between you two where you would look at him with an open, vulnerable expression and rest your head against his chest as you told him about your past. There was no tender, featherlight caress of your fingers on his cheeks as he revealed some of his fears and troubles to you. 

You had shut him out, adhering to the boundaries he had impulsively set as his anxieties got the better of him. Now he was left with the consequences of pushing you away.

‘There is nothing between us,’ he had said, but why was his heart breaking every time you looked at him with your cold stare and turned your back a moment later? Why was he lying awake at night, his mind occupied only with thoughts of you as the devouring feeling of loneliness and loss swelled in his chest and choked him? Why was he missing you so terribly that it made tears gather in his eyes when you had your back turned?

It was pathetic, and one night, after you had shot down his concern for the dark circles under your eyes and told him it should be of no matter as long as you performed your duties to his standard, he recognized his sentiment to be a lie. 

There was something between you. There had to be because the sinking feeling as you, clearly hurting, turned away once more tore him to shreds. There was no other explanation for it, but Isaac was afraid of what that realization brought with it.

He was afraid that the admission to his all-encompassing love for you would be the very thing that destroyed him. Everyone he loved was gone, and he felt his hands beginning to shake at the thought that you — now among those he adored — would meet the same fate because he was too slow, too weak, too incompetent to protect you.

Still, there was only so much hollowness he could endure, and the loneliness engulfing him was so acute that it had begun hurting to exist in the house. Your brief company somehow made him feel the loneliest of all.

A quiet sound of protest came from one of the corners of the library as Isaac switched off the light. “Sorry,” he apologized tiredly, turning the light back on to look at you, huddled on the small sofa with a blanket around you and a book in your hands. Judging by the cover, it was Frankenstein. “I thought you had already gone to bed and left the light on by mistake. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

You glanced at the clock on the wall and sighed. It was late. However, something kept you from sleeping for the past few weeks, and no matter how tired you were, it was nearly impossible for you to doze off. At times, when the morning sun was slowly rising over the horizon and the first rays illuminated the dark blue of night, it felt like you were too tired to fall asleep.

“No worries,” you said curtly, resuming your reading, “I will make sure to turn off the light when I go up in a minute. Good night.” 

The lie rolled off your tongue as if it were nothing. Isaac did not move from his place in the doorway. You knew he knew that you couldn’t sleep. It was evident in your appearance, your red eyes with dark bags beneath them that looked more like bruises with every passing day. The soft footsteps he could hear pacing around the house at night when you were too restless to sit down. He would be a lousy private investigator if he had not noticed your insomnia coming back in full force.

“I—” he said into the silence, making you look towards him.

“It is rather late,” you answered, trying to discourage Isaac from starting any conversation. In truth, it hurt having him near you when he was seemingly an infinity away, hidden behind some brick wall he had put up to keep the world out — you included. 

It was his decision, and after the kiss, or as he called it, a ‘lapse of judgment,’ you did not think it right to push his boundaries after he had so clearly told you and shown you with his actions, that he wanted nothing but a professional relationship with you. It made your heart crack, but you were adamant to give him only what he asked for, only as much as he wanted from you. It made the situation somewhat bearable to know it was what he wanted.

Isaac cleared his throat, stepping further into the room. “I know, but I— It’s just that you—” he stuttered, suddenly nervous at confronting you. “You haven’t been—”

“Well, I certainly am tired,” you said, marking the book to set it on the small table beside the couch and rising from your comfortable cocoon to fold the blanket neatly and place it over the back of the couch.

“Wait, I—”

“Good night then, boss.” You brushed past him and kept walking towards the door, but a hand on your wrist stopped you. “Don’t forget to turn off the light,” you said, fighting against the urge to lean into Isaac’s light touch. It wasn’t professional. That was not what he wanted. There was nothing between you.

“Don’t call me that, Pickle,” he said quietly, his thumb tracing small circles against your wrist. “I haven’t been— Our relationship has not been strictly business for a while now. It never was to begin with.”

“I thought that was what you wanted out of me,” you answered, unable to keep your voice from breaking as Isaac raised your hand to his lips, softly kissing the back of your hand. “You said—”

“I was wrong,” he said quickly, his eyes so earnest that you could not help but believe him, “I was scared that I would get too close to you after the kiss and then you would— you would leave me and— I don’t think I can go through that again, losing a person I love.”

At Isaac‘s words, something within you broke.

Tears began welling up in your eyes and you stepped closer to wrap your arms around him in a tight embrace, which he returned immediately. It felt so good to have him close to you again, his fingers running soothingly along your back as you could feel his elevated heartbeat pounding in his chest.

“You love me?” 

Isaac swallowed, squeezing you tighter and pulling you even closer to him as he steeled himself. “I do,” he said shakily, but the truth of his words was evident in the underlying confidence with which he delivered them, “and I’m sorry I made you doubt that. I’m sorry I pushed you away and dismissed our relationship as a mere work association when it has always been more than that. I— I was scared and I didn’t know what to do after you— after what you did for me and—“

You leaned back enough to meet his gaze. “Can I kiss you?” you asked, longing to do it properly this time, wanting to erase the bitter taste of rejection that had accompanied the feeling of Isaac’s lips on yours.

“Please,” he whispered, inclining his head as you moved to meet his lips.

Suffice it to say, with Isaac lying next to you in his soft double bed — him pulling you close and whispering sweet nothings into the darkness of night as your head rested on his chest and his arms were securely wrapped around you — you fell asleep almost immediately.

Isaac smiled, placing a kiss against the top of your head as he listened to your breathing even out.

— 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐭, 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫

✧·˚ the few times xanthus and love had some domestic moments together

𝓲.

“so you take the hair and go over and then under, you see?” dontis explains how to do a fishtail braid to you while using himself as a example.

“wow it’s really that simple?” he nods.

“yep it’s best not to over think it, it becomes muscle memory after a while, did you wanna try it for yourself?” you nod excitedly.

“i would love too.”

after a while you feel as though you’ve mastered the braid.

“i like this braid, it’s so simple but it looks so complicated and in turn it’s prettier.”

“i think you’ve perfected the braid now, you’ve been at it for hours and each new braid you make is better then the last.”

just as you finish combing out the braid from dontis’ hair, xanthus walks through the door, no doubt coming back from a fruitless search on some more information about the organization hunting him.

xanthus is clearly exhausted but still walks over to sitting on the couch and places a kiss on your cheek.

“i’ll be in the bedroom read if you need me love.”

you nod and watch him walk quietly to the bedroom. dontis picks up on your concern for him and chimes in.

“i have an idea, why don’t you try out your new braid skills on xanthus hm?”

you practically beam at the idea and thank dontis before quickly leaving to the bedroom. you knock softly on the door before hearing a ‘come in love’ from the other side.

“xanthus could i braid your hair?” you ask as you open the door to him sitting in bed reading a book.

“how many books do you think you’ve read?” you ask focusing on the braid you’re creating with his blonde hair.

“far too many for me to count. love are you sure you want to braid my hair? surely it would be easier to braid dontis’ since his is much longer than mine.”

“you’re probably right and he’d probably make less of a fuss about it.” xanthus looks up from his book, dumbfounded.

“i am not fussy.” he tries to move his head to look at you before you correct his position and he whispers an ‘ow’ as you pull his hair a bit.

“see? fussy.”

xanthus pouts as he hears dontis chuckle from the other room.

“i am not fussy” he mumbles.

you lean down and kiss him gently on the cheek.

“okay you’re not fussy, just pouty.” xanthus grumbles as he lets you continue braiding the short pieces of his hair.

“dontis i think you should let them braid your hair.”

dontis leans against the door frame and smiles.

“who do you think taught them?”

𝓲𝓲.

“what are you doing love?” your fingers light trace over xanthus’ palm lines while you lay in bed with him.

“you’re supposed to be asleep.”

“this one says you’ll live a long life.”

xanthus’ free arm wraps around you to pull you closer to him as he lets you continue reading his palm.

“oh really? what else does it say?” his eyes remain closed as he breathes in your scent before kissing your neck gently.

“does it say you should go to sleep?”

“that’s not how palm reading works you know.” you feel his lips curl into a smile again your skin.

“i know, but you need to get to sleep.” he says before placing a soft kiss on your jawline.

“sleep is so boring, palm reading is so interesting and palm reading a vampire is very interesting, plus i know you like the feeling of my fingers tracing your skin.”

“you little—”

“shit—” you quickly try to scramble away for him but his vampire reflexes are too quick for you and you’re trapped in his arms.

“go to sleep love.”

“do you miss being human?”

the question catches xanthus completely off guard and he has to think about it before he comes up with his answer.

“…yes.” he instinctively pulls you closer to him. “i didn’t before but now that i have you i miss it. i miss the fact i won’t get to grow old with you and that you’ll leave this plane of existence before me and i’ll be left alone.”

his answer stuns you to silence as you let his words sink into your mind. xanthus misses being human because of you. you place your hand over his and give it a light squeeze to reassure him.

“i’m not going anywhere on this plane of existence without you xanthus.”

“i appreciate that love.”

a part of xanthus aches for himself and his love since they’ll never be able to see him grow old. he lays awake most nights wonder if they’re upset at the fact they don’t have a normal partner, that they love a monster. the thought eats away at him constantly and he does his best to repress it, but it’s hard when you can feel what he feels.

“i love you xanthus, i hope you know that i couldn’t ask for a better life partner.”

‘life partner’ what a funny way to describe their relationship.

𝓲𝓲𝓲.

“xanthus how do you even know so much about skincare?”

for the past half hour xanthus and you have been doing skincare to keep the theme of a selfcare day and he has surprised you with knowing much more than you on what and what not to put on your face, he even defined your skin type and the best products for it.

“when you’ve been around as long as i have you pick up on a few things.” he says as he applies a cleanser to your cheeks.

“are the headbands necessary?”

“absolutely, you look adorable— look up for me.”

you sigh and look up so he can apply a cream for your under eyes that seem to grow darker by the day.

“i thought the roles would be reversed for this, you know me telling you what to use on your face.” you say as he finishes smoothing out the product.

“oh please, i don’t age.”

“then how do you—”

“lotion next!”

you smile and shake your head at the quick redirection of the topic.

“i would say with your complexion this will be the best product to use.”

he holds it up to you and you nod in agreement like you have a say in what’s happening. as he applies it you can’t help but stare at the focus on his features, it makes you smile.

“what are you smiling about love?”

“nothing, i just love you.”

xanthus stops his application and kisses you lovingly before pulling away.

“bleh, i think i got some of the toner on your lips and it is not a pleasant taste.”

you lick your lips to see what the fuss is about and you regret it instantly.

“oh bleh that tastes terrible!”

“i told you!”

finally here is some xanthus fluff! i’m not a monster, i love writing fluff but got so many asks for angst so i just did them all at once (YOU GUYS ASKED FOR IT)

this is an apology for what’s to come

.love always <3 pearl

.masterlist

Maybe you can write about xanthus calming listener down from a panic attack? :)

𝐖𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐖𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐒𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 ♥ Xanthus

˜”* ❝𝙒𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙬𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙡𝙚𝙚𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙜, 𝙄 𝙛𝙚𝙡𝙡 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚.❞

⎯⎯ ୨ ୧ ⎯⎯

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ: xᴀɴᴛʜᴜꜱ ᴄᴏᴍꜰᴏʀᴛꜱ ʏᴏᴜ.

⎯୨⎯ " " ⎯୧⎯

Everything was so slow, blurry, harsh. You were cold with the only warmth being from your tears. There wasn’t an exact reason you were acting this way, it wasn’t usual. You tried to keep it all in but it just spilled. Breathing was short and painful. It felt like some type of torture. 

Nobody saw you. It was just you, alone. Dontis was busy, Fran was outside, and Xanthus… Oh, Xanthus. He was probably feeling what you felt at this moment. Xanthus was most definitely panicking. 

There wasn’t much to see since your vision was blurry and your ears felt like they’d been muffled but you did hear a frantic tapping.

“Love?”

You looked to your right and saw what would look like Xanthus if your tears weren’t in the way. He’s never seen you like this and you didn’t ever want him to. 

“Xanthus.”

Your body started shaking like you were about to collapse. 

“Hey, hey. It’s okay, love.”

Xanthus rushed to your side and held you. He guided you to bed and tucked you in. You wiped some of your tears, clearing everything up and when you did you saw that pitiful look on Xanthus’ face. You could tell he felt hurt seeing you like this. 

“I’m sor–”

“Don’t apologize, love. Are you okay?”

You looked at his face which was painted with concern. A wave of emotion hit you and your tears began to fall again. Xanthus held you tighter and wiped your tears. He didn’t know what was happening but wanted to help and be there.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

After finally settling down, you were laying in silence with Xanthus. There wasn’t anything you really wanted to say. Your tears had made you exhausted and Xanthus could see that. 

Xanthus positions himself so he can see you better, “Love?”

“Hm?”

“If you were worried about something, you would tell me, right?”

You didn’t reply. Anything would be wrong. ‘Yes’, No. ‘No’, Yes. 

“Love.”

“It depends.” You answer.

“If you had another one of these, would you tell me?”

Would you? That was the question. The question you truly didn’t have the answer to. 

Xanthus saw the look on your face. He sighed before lying back down. 

“Goodnight, love. I love you,” He said before kissing your forehead. He didn’t expect a reply. You normally don’t say anything after he says ‘I love you’. It didn’t make him upset. He understood. 

You didn’t go to sleep until he fell asleep. And before you did, 

“I love you too, Xanthus.”

But of course, 

Xanthus doesn’t sleep before you.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

i think i went off script.... oopsie. anyway i felt like xanthus should make a comeback since the last time i wrote for him was my first post... ANYWAY i hope u liked reading this as much as i liked writing it

(and i pray that saku isn't lurking at this very moment.)

Guys I have listened to Xanthus audio part 9 so often. I am smiling trough it THE ANGST ISNT ANGSTIE ENOUGH ANYMORE !!!

— can’t catch me now

[𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫] xanthus claiborne

a/n: just a heads up this is not written like my usual fan fictions <3

a cold numbness spreads through xanthus’ body as he watches the scene in front of him unfold. the lifeless body of his lover lays on the floor in front of him. their blood pools around them as xanthus looks up to the assailant with eyes that pierce through their soul. what happens next xanthus can barely remember, the room is flooded with painful screams as they plead for mercy but in the end he now stands over two bodies, covered in blood that is not his. the warmth of his lover has faded and is now only a distant memory. he cradles their corpse in his arms and lets out a wail of grief he didn’t know he had in him.

the next few years tick by agonizingly. the empty feeling hasn’t left him since that faithful day. the hole that his lover left feels as though it grows deeper with each passing month. he sees them everywhere in the little things humans do that resemble them when they were still among the living. it’s always the smallest thing, like the way someone in the distances laughs or a passing smell of a perfume/cologne they had used. their presence lingers in xanthus’ mind always, they’re stuck in his memory.

every person he feeds from leaves a sour taste in his mouth, for in his mind it is not the same. he is drinking to live but before he was once drinking because he loved. each taste is bittersweet and unfamiliar.

‘it’s not fair.’

xanthus thinks to himself as he stares down at passed out body of his latest victim. he wonders why he wasn’t strong enough to defend the love of his painfully immortal life. every waking moment he exists, he is haunted by the ghost of what could’ve been.

xanthus drowns himself in sleepless nights with nameless people trying to feel what he felt before but to no avail. the emptiness is never filled, he remains hollow and feels like a half of him is missing, the better half of him.

unfinished paintings litter the floor of xanthus’ home, all portraits of his deceased lover and each one is painted slightly differently then the one before it. the details of their face are fading in the memory that xanthus was once so proud of. it hurts to slowly forget someone that he once loved. he regrets not taking more photos over them when he had the chance.

he picks up a blank canvas and his brushes to begin on another painting of the face they he once kissed with his own lips. he starts painting the only face of yours that his burned in his memory, unfortunately for him it’s a face that wasn’t living. after only a few hours he stands back from his work and lets his eyes drink in what he has created.

if no one knew the story behind the painting they might say it’s the most beautiful piece they’ve ever seen, but xanthus refuses to let anyone other than him see the worst image he has in his memory. he knows that only he should be the one to live with the pain, since he believes it is his fault for the death of his partner.

hot tears stream down his face as xanthus bares his teeth in anger. he throws the painting across the room in a fit of rage and collapses on the floor in a broken mess.

‘they are gone because i wasn’t fast enough. i was careless.’

the painting lays broken in a mess across from an open window, the draft it creates carries the smell of fresh paint throughout the large building. the moon’s glow floods the rooms and creates a makeshift spotlight on the destroyed painting, which draws xanthus’ attention away from his pity party.

the wet paint glistens in the pale moonlight until a shadow appears on the windowsill, the shadow of a small bird. xanthus looks at it quizzically and carefully shifts to move closer, worried that the bird might flee at the sudden movement, but it doesn’t. the bird remains on the sill even as xanthus looks over it, in fact it even looks up at him to chirp happily.

without even realizing xanthus extends his finger for the bird to perch itself on and it does so with hesitation. he’s confused about this little fearless bird, birds are the definition of fight or flight and yet this one chooses neither.

‘could it be?’

xanthus’ mind fills with delusional hope for in the back of his mind he knows it couldn’t be possible, yet he has no idea why this bird is not afraid; maybe it’s because they never were.

the bird chirps once more almost as if to say goodbye before flying back out of the open window. the moon shines off its wings and xanthus watches as it goes. maybe someday he’ll be with you again, flying together above the trees in the moonlight.

please reblog to show support ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄

i get so many requests about the listener dying so i was like i wonder what xanthus would do with himself after?

.love always <3 pearl

.masterlist

Not ZSakuVA pulling me into this fandom by the fucking hair with the Zaros audio. I wrote a fanfic, 6k words, it's lil angsty. based off of @why-me-marti lil post about a ball and Zaros asking listener to dance again. I am DESPERATE!! for Zaros content. and since he's so new i figured no one will really do a fic with him. honoured to be the first <3