I Crashed Out And I’m Currently Taking A Gap Year, I Spend My Days Writing And Laying In My Bed Like

Starting uni today, I've been trying to hold my tears in since I woke up. I couldn't get much sleep because of how nervous I was, I woke up at three in the morning, and finally got up to get ready at five; It's almost seven now.

How strange this is, I feel as if my youth withered away. I miss my childhood, and especially my teenage years, which weren't too cheerful as I was a strange child, and even stranger teenage girl. I guess nostalgia is a bitch, but I just want to be fourteen again. Time goes by so quickly I'm getting whiplash.

I'm scared about meeting people, scared to not make friends, scared to be that weird teenage girl forever. I can't eat, my stomach's all closed up, and I've got a migraine. God, this is weird.

Anyway, I'll keep you posted, lots of love,

Anna.

I got bullied all throughout middle school and high school, moved to a different school in tenth grade and in eleventh grade I wrote about my past experience for a school project. My teacher loved it, used it as an example, read it in front of the class, etc. I told my parents about that, my dad sent it to a newspaper (a VERY important newspaper in Spain, La Vanguardia) and a week later I got a phone call: They wanted to publish it and interview me. The interview did really well, I met a sports journalist I really admired, got called for a tv program (but my parents refused to let me get on tv), it was overall just cathartic.

The following June I got a text from that journalist, he gave me two tickets to watch the Spanish grand prix, I took my best friend with me.

@dntaed, @cherrycolaheartss,@palala2314 idkkk whoever else wants to joinnn

it's so weird to me that everyone on this website is a human person outside of their weird internet niche so rb this with a random bit of your lore

born 2 be spoiled n’pampered like the princess I am ♡

I had my second creative writing workshop today. I didn’t write to you guys about the first because it was just an introduction, and not much happened. Today was good, though.

The class is from four to seven p.m. and pretty dense in terms of what we are taught, I enjoy it a lot. I submitted my first short story (I will publish it on Substack once my teacher corrects it).

I also went to uni today, although I’d dropped out, I went to meet with some friends and stayed for a class. I loved seeing everyone and catching up, I laughed a lot.

The air is not so chilly anymore and it starts to smell sweeter, like cherry blossoms. I like when I can feel spring clawing its way through. Anytime spring comes slowly I always think of Hades and Persephone bidding their goodbyes in the underworld.

Also, crazy thing happening lately on my tumblr!! I’ve been getting asks of people genuinely insulting my appearance, and others asking me if I had foetal abnormalities. First of all, I do not. I am not disabled and I’m very lucky. Second of all, I do not tolerate these kind of attitudes so I’ve blocked those accounts.

I know I’m not the prettiest girl in the wolrd, but that doesn’t make me worth any less. Plus, I am pretty, and happy, and loved. I’m good.

All yours,

Anna 🫶🏻

P.S. I’m dyeing my hair tomorrow! (only fixing the roots, might post a pic of it! ☺️)

may this love find me 🤧

1 February, 1937 Letters to Véra by Vladimir Nabokov

⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ Anita's Tumblr ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

୨୧ Anna / Anita . 8TEEN ౨ৎ She /They .ᐟ

⋆ My name is Anna, I’m eighteen and I love to watch movies, write, read and draw.

My favorite films are: American psycho, The Dark Knight, Spellbound and Secretary

My favorite books: The secret history, American psycho and Pale fire

I listen to: Lana del rey, Leonard Cohen, The cure and Phoebe Bridgers

I also write essays and lit fic on substack

♡ ‧₊˚ ⋅ ౨ৎ  ‧₊ .ᐟ

I write fics and make fanart on @cinnamongrl2006 (I use it waaayyy more than this blog)

wait i didn't know you dropped out of college?? what happened

Nothing, really. I started a purely academic degree (literary studies) thinking that was my thing, thinking I wanted to dedicate my time to research and reading papers and it wasn’t for me. I’m to creative and active to sit around reading articles that i disagree with for the most part, I get angry and don’t study and my essays turn out hateful and uncalled for.

But I’m going back to uni this september, I’ll be a humanities major!

Hola chicas! Sé que esto es un poco diferente a lo que suelo publicar, pero acabo de subir un ensayo en Substack y me gustaría que lo leyeran. El ensayo es un trabajo que hice para clase de historia de la filosofía el año pasado, es sobre la relación entre el marxismo y el feminismo y habla de que pese a sus similitudes las dos doctrinas nunca se han unido, y de el porqué de todo eso. aquí está el link:

enlamadrigueradelconejo.substack.com

Marxismo y feminismo un matrimonio infeliz

La tensa relación entre el marxismo y el feminismo

Espero que os guste, como siempre,

Xx,

Anna.

Just expressed a thought on my notes app

the virgin suicides