Since We’re Coming To The Last Month Of The Year, Here Are The Top 10 Tumblr Controversies This Year

25 years ago an unknown Chinese protester stood in front of a tank in defiance of the government. No one knows the identity of the man but he was given the nick name “Tank Man”. This is one of the most iconic photographs of the century.

Too many artists are held back by outdated and bad color theory rules, or even rules that are fine but have built in limitations that you should know and I want to set everyone free.

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Block these sites in your uBlock Origin so you won't see that shit in your searches

Want to learn something new in 2022??

Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)

40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)

Excellent basic crochet video series

Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)

Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)

How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)

Another drawing character faces video

Literally my favorite art pose hack

Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??

Introduction to flying small aircrafts

French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding

Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)

Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)

Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)

Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:

Calculus 1 (full semester class)

Learn basic statistics (free textbook)

Introduction to college physics (free textbook)

Introduction to accounting (free textbook)

Learn a language:

Ancient Greek

Latin

Spanish

German

Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)

French

Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)

I wish kinky sex ed wasn't so stigmatized even among left-leaning "sex positive" circles. Everyone's all "uwu I'm a sub I'll do anything you ask" okay mommy wants you to read The New Bottoming Book so you learn how to sub without hurting yourself since your sex ed up to this point is porn and your ex boyfriend Jared who liked to choke you incorrectly

In my brief experience as my girlfriend's sub I noticed the swift emergence of a temptation to try to top from the bottom. I also noticed how this robbed the experience of everything it was aimed at providing. I assume, especially at first, that this is common. The man in you rebels a bit. Any tips for becoming a genuine sub? I do know that that is what I want sexually.

It’s in the nature of human beings, Female and male, to try to get what they want. I too have made the mistake you mention, and I think you’re right to suspect that it’s common. In past relationships with Women who were not so familiar with Female supremacy, I led from the bottom and regretted it. But what, as sub males, we have to realize is this: The insistence on leading from below *and* the resulting feeling of dissatisfaction may come from the same place–the desire by the male to satisfy himself. We put it in our heads that it has to be a certain way, fit some specific imagery we’ve picked up along the way in porn or personal experience. But it doesn’t have to be that way, and if we let go of those expectations, things get a little easier. It’s still a balance between submitting and asking for a little something along the way, but opening your male mind beyond the imagery and opening a space where you may still ask for a little something for yourself is–or has been in our relationship–hugely important. As I say, it’s a balance; ask for everything and get everything and it’s not going to feel like a completely Female-led relationship.

So here are some suggestions that might help (it works for us):

1. Remember what your father taught you. Hopefully your father (or similar figure) taught you the simple courtesy of good manners toward all Women. I suspect that most male subs received this teaching. Base your servitude upon that. Open doors for Her (for all Women, actually, but first and absolutely without fail for your Domina). Hold Her chair for Her in restaurants. Wait until She begins to eat before touching your own meal. Ask Her, “May I be excused?” before visiting the men’s room. That’s possibly a bit more than what our fathers taught us, but it’s close. Build on that. Ask Her if you may bring Her refreshment, whether Her shoes are comfortable presently, or whether She is comfortable with the room temperature. Is it stuffy? Offer to fan Her. Is it cold? Offer Her your coat, or rub her arms for Her if you have no coat. Notice that we haven’t even gotten to the realm of the sexual, but this should be your mindset; this will help set the tone for everything else. There are so many ways to be at Her disposal non-sexually, that you should make it a point *every day* to think up new ways that you might assist Her and make Her life easier, more comfortable. Now, this can go so far as to irritate some Women, and She should be able to let you know when it’s time to sit down and keep your mouth shut–you offer a world of services and She selects which ones She wants. 

2. Realize what your orgasm does to you. Who doesn’t want to have one? But there is actually more harm to your mindset in having one than you might realize. Others have posted on the chemistry of what happens to a man following orgasm, and I won’t attempt to explain it here. So whether you are strong enough to resist touching yourself or whether you actually need to be caged, avoid orgasms unless She wants them from you. Do that and you will see how badly you want to please Her. And in bed as elsewhere, your focus should be on Her. Believe me, when your mindset is right, you will derive a great deal of pleasure for yourself simply in knowing that you are satisfying Her. 

A suggestion: When you feel you’re having trouble resisting the urge to use your cock, be honest and say so. Ask Her if you may touch it. If She says no, great! You’ll suddenly have a sense of Her control. If She says yes, ask Her if you might do so right then and there. Some Dominas may never let you cum. Even though the Female is in charge, there may still be room for negotiation for some allowances. If She doesn’t even want to hear such requests, She will let you know. And either way, it’s a win-win because you’ve asked for something you want. And if She grants you permission, well then you get to be the dirty little dog fucking his hand in front of your Superior.

This weekend I got to cum twice. I was so desperate and feeling so…how do I put this? …so slutty and needy that when She said yes I almost cried and I got on my back, spread my legs, pointed my toes, and stroked like a mad man. The second occasion She allowed me, Sunday morning, I did it again, the very same thing, and this time She mounted my face and grinded against me while She watched me spread myself and fuck my hand. I like the way my desperation drives me to being dirty, and so does, I believe, Mistress. She says so and I can see it for myself.

3. The result of your orgasm is your responsibility. We men walk away from events after we’ve cum. That’s a fact. You owe it to Her to continue to be a good man/boi to Her even though you will get those feelings inside–the ones that make you a bit lazy and lax in fulfilling your duties. Discipline yourself to be responsible for that orgasm She granted you and do not turn your back on Her once She’s given it to you.

4. Watch how everyone else except men get attention in this world. When I’m feeling desperate for my Domina’s attention (and Mistress will tell you that I’m high maintenance), I will picture how a dog gets the attention of his Mistress. I am not bashful about (at home) crawling up to Mistress and putting my cheek against Her thigh, or Her feet, or licking Her hands or shoes–just like a dog does. Simply watch what your own dog does to get your attention and you’ll know exactly what I mean.

In bed, I may kiss Her cheek or touch Her hand or even wrap my legs around Her. She is my Partner, my Mate, my Best Friend, my Superior. 

In public I will kiss Her hand and look into Her eyes and smile. She knows me. She knows what it all means. I’m flirting. I’m showing Her how much I want Her in any way She will have me. I am inviting Her to take me in whatever manner She will, if She will.

5. Let it happen. Just let it happen. If She is an Alpha, She will take it from there. But allow yourselves to grow into it. Take it slowly. It doesn’t take off necessarily like a rocket (unless you’re lucky enough, like me, to have found someone who has already taken men to their knees). Appreciate everything She gives you–it’s a lot of work for Her. Appreciate also the secret desires She confesses to you, because trust is a gift that goes both directions.

Give in and let go. Give up your expectations as well as your inhibitions. Do so and I believe you’ll find the deepest kind of love you can imagine. 

–servus

Know what I’m salty about?

In all my art classes, I was never taught HOW to use the various tools of art.

Like yes, form, and shape and space and color theory and figure drawing is important, but so is KNOWING what different tools do.

I’m 29 and I JUST learned this past month that India Ink is fucking waterproof when it dries. Why is this important? Because I can line something in India Ink and then go over it with watercolors. And that has CHANGED the ENTIRE way I art and the ease I can create with.

tldr: Art Teachers: teach your students what different tools do. PLEASE.

This isn’t funny like most of my story posts but enough people have asked some for my opinions about lubricants and general tips that I figured I’d do a little master post about it.

I’m not a doctor! I just worked in a sex shop for several years and picked up a bunch of helpful nuggets, here they are.

All the links will be funny stories though, if you’re looking for a laugh.

Lubricants:

Silicone

Silicone Lube Pros: This stuff is the energizer bunny of lubricant. A very small amount goes a really long way and cannot be absorbed into the body. For anal, those experiencing vaginal dryness, or just really good penetrative sex between partners silicone is wonderful. Silicone is also extremely inert and by itself cannot cause yeast infections or allergic reactions*. Doesn’t taste or smell of anything.

*Some manufactures may add things to silicone to cut costs that could negatively impact genitals, read ingredients.

Silicone Lube Cons: Not safe with toys. Silicone lube can bond to silicone toys, this is basically always terrible. Because of its nature it can be very difficult to clean up, rags might be necessary as water will not help you much. This lubricant can feel very thin to some people who might prefer a more substantial feel. Also it can stain clothes or bedding in large quantities so having a dedicated sex blanket or towel can save sheets.

Favorite Brand: Pjur. Spendier but best overall feeling to me, nice and silky and a single bottle will last ages.

Water Based

Water Based Pros: This lube is the work horse and skeleton key of lube. If you never want to worry about what bottle you reach for, water based always has your back. It’s safe with toys, condoms, you name it. It comes in a variety of thicknesses and viscosity, there’s truly a water based lube for every preference.

Water Based Cons: Tragically, we are made of water. Human bodies love to absorb the water part of this equation, meaning it needs to be reapplied more frequently. For certain activities or bodies it’s nicer to have a lube that doesn’t need quite so much reapplication. Additionally you have to be careful of what ingredients* get added, many cost saving ones are a yeast infection in a bottle.

*Never use Astroglide, KY, or Vaseline, they bank on brand recognition and make the shittiest lube in feel, performance, and body safety. Glycerin or glycol is always a red flag ingredient for vaginal use.

Favorite Brand: Earthly bodies WaterSlide. There are So Many water based options that it’s hard to pick. This was my go to because it has a pretty okay feel but its ingredients list is short and to the point with nothing offensive like glycol to watch out for. It rehydrates very nicely if you lick it, it doesn’t throw off vaginal pH, and it’s inexpensive and easy to get. Even Walmart has it.

Hybrid

Hybrid Lube Pros: As the name suggests this is like silicone and water based had a baby. This lubricant has more body than a traditional silicone while being much more long lasting than a water based on its own. It cleans up easier than silicone and is still a good option for any type of sex except toys.

Hybrid Lube Cons: Still not safe to use with toys. That’s basically it. It’s pretty great.

Favorite Brand: Sliquid. I love their hybrid, it feels very nice with more substance than a silicone on its own and they’re a very nice brand overall in every category.

Oil Based

Oil Based Pros: Oil based is almost always on hand in either olive or coconut oil, it’s second only to silicone in butt stuff territory and some people prefer oil. Like the Roman Empire, which, I can’t blame them. Tastes and smells pretty nice.

Oil based Cons: Cannot be used with condoms. Kind of a big deal! Using condoms with anal is still a good idea but oil based lost favor when it turned out it destroys the most common modern prophylactic. Additionally oil can mess with vaginal pH. Anecdotally I’ve had people tell me it was infection after infection and others who only ever used oil. Similar to silicone, tough to clean up.

Favorite Brand: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I’ve never had personal experience with them and I don’t know which way to steer you, sorry. Messing with condoms mean that this lube has struggled commercially.

More Below, just don’t want this getting too long. (Also in case I need to add to this it’ll keep current version circulating if this blows up.)

Notable mentions for lube:

Spermicidal lube: Truly terrible for you. It causes micro tears and irritation which open you up to more disease and infections, besides which it tastes repulsive and is not a very effective preventative. Just don’t.

Flavored lube: I really don’t recommend this? Good lube doesn’t taste like anything, I don’t see that this needs to exist. Vaginas do not like anything sugary in them, which all flavored lubes are by nature. For health reasons it’s extremely Inadvisable to eat out butts without protection. If you must use flavored lube on a vagina haver try to focus it on the clit and not internally.

Condoms:

Condoms come pre-lubricated but did you know: Most condom tearing is the result of insufficient lube inside the condom? For safer sex put a few extra drops of lube inside the condom to increase sensation and decrease risk of tearing

Don’t store them in your wallet. Your body heat will break down the condom much quicker than storing in a drawer. If you’re going to carry one grab it fresh for a date.

Condoms stretch but they need to be tight at the base. Tight however doesn’t meet cutting off circulation. That’s a cock ring. If you need to wear condoms I recommend trying a few singles to see what brand feels the best for your body.

There are lambskin condoms but I don’t recommend them at all. They cannot be tested for tears, they still transmit STIs and they feel like wax paper. Polyisoprene is better in virtually every way for those with allergies.

Most people suffer from low grade latex allergies making a lot of condoms unpleasant. Latex was the first material able to be tested for structural integrity (they run a small electrical charge through it to test for breakages, neat right?). However! A new material hit the market called polyisoprene. It passes all the same safety regulations as latex while being hypoallergenic and contains much lower odor which brings me to…

Favorite Brand: Skyns. These condoms are truly excellent, smell and taste of nothing, and are just as safe as latex! The best. Really.

Anal:

Do not just stick a dick in a butt. Anal is about patience and many people have an awful first time. I cannot count the number of men who came in to ask, “How do I convince my girlfriend to do anal?” No. Start small, little plugs or fingers, and work your way up. Make sure things are relaxed and very very very like so very lubricated.

Do not. Ever. Numb your ass. Many products try to sell you on numbing your butt for anal. This is how emergency room trips happen. You need to listen to your butt, numbing it is how tearing happens.

Don’t rip out anal beads. I feel like it should be clear why ripping anything out of your body like you’re trying to start a chainsaw is a mistake but it bears repeating.

Butts. Will. Consume. Do not ever insert anything into your ass that doesn’t have a flared base. A flared base should have a perpendicular width of two inches to be safe. Don’t end up an ER horror story.

Ok but like. What the fuck is there to do on the internet anymore?

Idk when I was younger, you could just go and go and find exciting new websites full of whatever cool things you wanted to explore. An overabundance of ways to occupy your time online.

Now, it's just... Social media. That's it. Social media and news sites. And I'm tired of social media and I'm tired of the news.

Am I just like completely inept at finding new things or has the internet just fallen apart that much with the problems of SEO and web 3.0 turning everything into a same-site prison?