her eyes met his, and she couldn't help but notice the depth of emotion that lingered within them, as it always seemed to even some years ago. It was as if they were silently communicating, understanding the unspoken words that hung heavy in the air between them. the memories of their shared history flooded her mind, and she couldn't help but wonder what could have been, if they had chosen a different path, still, zahra never lingered long upon what might've occurred in her life had she made different choices. in truth, she didn't have regrets, and she very much enjoyed where she was at this point.
it seemed so silly now, to have let so many years slip by with not so much as a hello between them, though the lack of conversations and staying connected did not stem from a place of anger. perhaps in a way, they had both outgrown the relationship they had, the different paths they took providing clear evidence of such a fact. zahra was admittedly glad that he had eventually found what he was looking for for his home, a strong, beautiful wife to serve by his side.
though thoughts rushed through her mind like the currents of the greenblood, she did not feel bouts of anxiety creeping in her stomach, nor hoped to quickly end the conversation as soon as it began. zahra felt an overwhelming sense of peace, and perhaps this was simply the beginning of a new chapter for them, as the last had long been concluded. if she felt any emotion that might be evoked within her features, it was that of hope and happiness to have someone who was always so important to her in her life yet again, even in small doses such as passing by one another in the halls of sunspear.
"and you." she replied, suddenly realizing the breath she had held released, almost as if she was releasing the curtains she had drawn over herself, unsure if this encounter would provide some sense of solace for what had occurred between them in the past, or if perhaps there would be tensions. though she had braced herself for something, the moment he spoke she felt entirely foolish for it. it was entirely out of character for the rashid she knew to grasp onto such things and let wounds fester.
"still dancing." a soft laugh left her, the ease of speaking to the lord of tor coming over her now. "the princess invited me to teach her daughter, and i certainly couldn't refuse such an offer." though zahra hesitated to find herself planted in one spot, she was glad for many reasons to find an excuse to walk the halls of sunspear more often. "and you? i hope things have been well. i would certainly like to visit the tor again sometime." aside from her connection with the man before her, her time there had provided her with dear memories and friendships, along with things she would rather forget.
صبر
for all the theatrics and the drama that seemed to follow in the footprints zahra sand would leave within the golden dunes themselves, it were never the sort that were emotionally taxing: drama came in the form of flamboyant movements, of laughter, of facial expressions that said everything before her lips even parted. never was it raised voices and arguments, which is why when their end came, it came quietly; that slow wonder of whether there was anything wrong between them for them to be feeling on such opposites pages of the same book the way they did.
the morning sun made strands of her hair appear more auburn in some streaks as they sat beside one another, listening to the distant sounds of a flute playing in the time where silence sat between the pair of them; the tune of that flute had remained imprinted into his mind, even now, so many years later. that had been the conversation in which they addressed the clear differences in their lives, and in what they wanted from them; coming to the ultimate conclusion that there was no way for them to continue in their adoration and devotion to one another without one sacrificing what they needed, or wanted.
truthfully, he knew not why he had hesitated on merely bridging the gap between them and approaching her: instead, finding silent humour in the fact that the both of them had paused in their journey to merely stand some spaces away from one another. he were glad to hear the sound of his name leaving from her lips in a tone that showed there was no resentment or anger, for it was the exact same as what she would find within him; only, there were moments where it seemed the nerves seemed to swell within her. and it were impossible not to notice, considering the look she shared upon her face: she may as well have started moving her feet from side to side, to quell out the nerves.
"zahra." he greeted in response to the uttering of his name, taking some steps forward to meet her, always meeting her right in the middle. his choice of language was not awkward or strained, but rather with a degree of warmth to it: for despite the years that had gone in their natural separation, he was happy to see her. in sunspear of all places, walking with a degree of comfort and ease around the majestic halls which seemed to suggest this was hardly to be the last time he came across her here. "it is good to see you." and his words were genuine, for he meant them: he were able to look upon her, and not feel as though he were inwardly spiralling.
he were able to look upon her, and have an immense love for the history they had once shared with one another: without feeling as though he were nothing.
to make homes out of people is folly, was what he had spoken to dastan allyrion some days ago; and here was the woman that had taught him such a thing. he only cared for her more for it. he raised a humble hand to his chest as he accepted her congratulations, nodding his head; looking around at the marriages in dorne, he were more and more thankful for his wife each passing day. "thank you. the gods did bless me that day." he spoke, his tone warm in thinking of it. he looked upon her, taking her in almost: not in a way that suggested lust, but in a way that was reconnecting.
"and i guess it was only a matter of time before you found yourself in sunspear. what are you doing these days?"
the melodic sound of anklets jingling echoed quietly within the great halls of sunspear, a place that she had found herself wandering in and out of in more recent months as she had become a teacher to the very heir of dorne herself, an achievement she would've only imagined acquiring years ago. while the dancer of salt shore had many privileges in her life, for a bastard, zahra had worked tirelessly to secure her own name and her own way in this life. it was, perhaps, the most important thing to her, was her fierce sense of independence and self-reliance.
her mind wandered now, knowing that, while her perseverance had been crucial, it had been her time spent in the tor that had seen her greatest period of growth in her skill - not in just dancing. she found herself now quietly humming the tune that had played during practice, her feet practically floating upon the very floor itself as a hand moved to the beat of the music that played only in her own head. she had a way of immersing herself so much in the dance and music, that the world around her seemed to fade away. though singing and acting had consumed much of her time as well while she was in the tor, it was always dancing that had held her greatest interest.
as dark hues looked at the pattern the suns rays made upon the floor now as it illuminated through the many grand windows that were lined together, she felt a sense of bittersweetness come over her. how that time in her life probably halted her wandering feet for the longest she had stayed in one place in quite a while, and perhaps it only pushed her to further fly away before she ever settled anywhere. there was no anger, but peace as her mind settled back down on the thoughts of her time there. her time with him.
her thoughts seemed to will the image of rashid jordayne to appear now, and though she thought she imagined him entirely, he was there, just some paces away from her. she hadn't even noticed him at first, or perhaps she did and didn't realize it until now. the ever-expressive face of zahra sand did not hide what lurked within her mind, and right now it was surprise. surprise that he was there, despite the fact he had ever reason to be. her feet paused now. paused. in times past they would fly towards the man before her, but now they halted all together.
the shock wore off after a few beats of silence and her features stilled entirely, he had clearly noticed her, too. what was one to say to fill the years lost between two souls? there was no animosity between them, only a connection lost after they parted ways. certainly there were times where they were in the same vicinity, but yet worlds away.
a warm smile naturally crept on her lips now, for zahra was never one to sit in silence for very long. "rashid." she said, for she could not think of any other greeting that would suit the situation as of now. she wanted to ask him many questions, but she wouldn't. she didn't need to. she opened her mouth again to speak, but the words did not come as quickly as she expected, leaving a woman who was always found loudly conversing or laughing within a group, unusually silent.
a few more beats passed before she finally thought of one thing to say. "i....heard of your marriage to the princess loreza, congratulations." there was a genuine tone in her words, for zahra knew what rashid had yearned for, or one of the many things, and certainly the princess would make a fine ruling lady of the tor.
who: @dancingshores when and where: following zahra sand's audience with the princess myriam of house allyrion, rashid jordayne comes across a memory in the hallways of sunspear.
it was not often rashid qamar of house jordayne thought of midnight: it was not often the man was even awake to see midnight, if not attending formal events within the great domed mirrored halls of sunspear's fortress, and it was not often the man thought of the moon he had been named after. there was once a time in his life where he and midnight were old friends, companions even; as though the middle of the night was the middle of the day, for that was when the sun seemed the most like she shined. it was not often rashid qamar of house jordayne thought of rain; those ancient ancestors before them learning to survive with what little of it there was, and that still meant he was unable to deny the beauty of the first rain of the harvest.
rare as it was, and yet, most things that truly mattered in life were incredibly rare, were they not?
the transition into lordship was one he had undertaken some years ago, following the slow and painful death of a father that deserved so much better than the end that was given to him. visiting him day after day to see his immobile condition only worsen was enough to stir and swirl what peace the man seemed to hold within his own chest, locked up under secret lock and key; his transition to lordship came with carrying the heavy burden of grief, as the transition does to all who take the mantle. it had taken him time to understand how to grieve for someone who continued to live. and live, and live, and live, as she had always done; swirling skirts and the sounds of laughter ringing from atop a stage, or the time her ankle twisted and he found himself needing to carry her on his own back.
it made him realise there was no grieving for what could have been; only acceptance. for the what if remained very much alive.
it was that same acceptance he knew all too well as he walked the halls of sunspear following a conversation with the soon to be future ruling prince, if rumours were correct, considering the movements he would make as a lord. he thought of how he wanted to be remembered, knowing the genuine weight of his actions: he was not a man who spoke for the sake of speaking. he was not a man who did not consider all options deeply, before settling. but he was a man who followed through on his word: it could bloom, or it could rip away what there could never be. that same feeling of acceptance seemed to slowly wash over him as he looked up within bustling halls, filled with such a stark variety of colours: and yet still, his eyes immediately fell to her.
her face remained the same. her walk remained the same. there was a time where it was he that was too much the same, and now he felt as though he were changing; only to look upon her and see she truly was just the same. as though she remained entirely where they had left one another, a part of him almost went to look at her ankle to wonder whether she were able to walk on it properly now. there were no words that came out of his mouth, though he felt a slight exhale come out of him; so subtle it was hard to notice. once he held his breath when he saw her, and felt a thudding deep within his heart - and now? now he exhaled.
it was relief he felt in her presence. what words were there that could even be echoed within such a time, when it had been years and somehow felt like it had not all at the very same time?
he said nothing. he didn't need to.