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Vanossgaming - Blog Posts

4 years ago

panda: Sorry I was late I was doing... stuff...

vanoss: [bursts in]

vanoss: I’m “stuff.”


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4 years ago

vanoss: cowboys are witches and horses are their familiars

panda: guns are their wands and they only know one spell bullet

[tyler and scotty outside]

tyler: rootin; tootin; toil n’ shootin’

scotty: fire burn and cowboy bootin’

tyler: eye of newt and spicy beans,

scotty: toe of frog and denim jeans,

tyler: whiskey, grits, n’ demon spittle

scotty: tossed into my iron griddle

tyler: with the tannin’ of our hides,

tyler and scotty: somethin’ wicked this way rides


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4 years ago

vanoss: it’s really muggy out today.

panda:if i go outside and all our mugs are on the front lawn, i’m going to kill you.

vanoss: *sips coffee from a bowl*


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4 years ago

panda: if i was a gardener i’d put our tulips together

vanoss, tearing up: i love you

2p! panda, looks at 2p! vanoss : well?

2p! vanoss: if i was a gardener you’d be my hoe

vanoss:

panda:

2p! panda, tearing up: i love you too hoe


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4 years ago

moo: evan, why are you naked?

evan: i...uhh... don’t have any clothes

moo: *opens closet* sure you do, you have shirts, pants, oh hi panda, that new hat i bought you, jackets


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4 years ago

panda: Please don’t…

Vanoss:

panda: Please don’t…

Vanoss: [draws Homer]

panda: [sigh]


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4 years ago

Moo: are you a little spoon or a big spoon?

tyler: I’m a knife

evan, from the other room: he’s a little spoon


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4 years ago

evan's Dad: So tyler, what are your interests?

tyler: Your son in my room

evan's Dad: What?

tyler: The sun and the moon


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4 years ago

evan: i need advice

brock, eating raw cookie dough from the bowl: you’ve come to the right person


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4 years ago

Brian: You know, I kinda regret buying you that blender

evan, drinking toast: Why would you say that?


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4 years ago

terroriser: babe! babe! do the thing!

vanoss: [genuinely smiles]

terroriser, breathlessly: oh my god...


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4 years ago

terroriser: so how do i tell the guy i like, i love him.

vanoss: just suck it up and do it!

terroriser: okay, i love you.

vanoss: aww, i love you too, now go tell him!

terroriser: i just did;)

vanoss: how did it go??! did he say it back?!?

terroriser: dude.


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4 years ago

terroriser: He protec

terroriser: He attac

terroriser: ...but most importantly...

terroriser: [pulls up a picture of vanoss] HE SUC AT MINECRAF.

vanoss: THE FUCK DID I EVER DO TO YOU!?!


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4 years ago

tyler: are you in love with evan?

brian: *sweats*... no.

tyler: then why do you draw ‘b+e’ in hearts everywhere you go?

brian: it stands for bitterness and emptiness


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4 years ago

terroriser: Not to brag, but I think me and vanoss are pretty cute together

smitty: Oh yeah? kryoz and I just baked cookies and it was so god damn cute I almost cried, try to top that robo boy

terroriser: Okay, pretty cute, but after we spent the day doing stuff together vanoss put on my hoodie and we fell asleep on the couch while watching a movie

smitty: Oh baby I can be here all night

terroriser: Bring it on then, milk bag


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5 years ago

*In a haunted house*

moo: This place is giving me the creeps. Look, I have goosebumps. Oh no. Oh no I don’t like this. Evan, I don’t like this

Vanoss, looking into the camera: Brock has goosebumps because it’s 39 degrees outside, the windows are broken, and he has no jacket. those are goosebumps of terrible planning. Wow. They sure are spooky.


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5 years ago

vanoss: moo, I just wanted to let you know that you are the best person I have ever met. I would do anything for you if you asked it. I would jump over the moon for you, would you go out with me?

moo: vanoss where are your pants


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5 years ago

*At a convention*

vanoss: These games are the oldest things at this convention.

vanoss, bumps into panda:

vanoss: I was wrong.


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5 years ago

vanoss: How many people do you have to kill for it to be illegal?

Moo: One. One person

vanoss: Are you sure?


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5 years ago

wildcat: Why are YOU here?

vanoss: Oh, you know, just tagging along. Don't worry, I won't cause ANY trouble

mini: So why do you have a shotgun?


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5 years ago

moo: What we need is a diversion. I say Mini gets naked.

jiggly: No.

Nogla: I could get naked.

Vanoss, Lui, and Basically: No!


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5 years ago

moo: I don't have anger issues. Do you guys think I have anger issues?

vanoss: Well, I wouldn't really call it an issue. An issue is something you can fix.


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5 years ago

Moo: vanoss, I don’t think you need any more coffee

vanoss: Coffee cures depression

Moo: It doesn’t work that way

vanoss: More espresso, less depresso


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5 years ago

moo: I didn't catch your name

vanoss: I didn't throw it


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5 years ago

moo: I have made the decision to trust you.

vanoss: A horrible decision, really.


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5 years ago

panda: Let me see what you have

vanoss: A knife!!

panda: No!!!

tyler: Oh my god, why does he have a knife?


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5 years ago

moo: Aren't you forgetting something?

vanoss: ...

vanoss: haPPY BIRTHDAY!!

moo: ...

moo: It's Valentine's Day.


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5 years ago

vanoss: So you remember the plan if I ever get shot right

moo: Of course

vanoss: Tell me

moo: In the case of you ever being shot, as you fall to the ground, I am to sing MMMMM WHATCHA SAY no matter the circumstances

vanoss: Good


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5 years ago

vanoss, after getting shot: Hit or miss… I guess they never miss; huh


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5 years ago

moo: I think you're starting to rub off on nogla a little bit

vanoss: What makes you say that?

nogla: *is running around stabbing people with a knife and laughing insanely*

nogla: *Looks over at vanoss and waves* Hi baby!!

vanoss: Hey babe! He's so cute, with his bloody knife and evil laughter


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