Urahara X Reader - Blog Posts

TW: angst, mentions of smut, addiction

Kisuke and the reader have a friends with benefits type of deal going on

You never slept well in someone else's bed. Especially not Kisuke's. He always kept his room freezing, making it all the harder for you to sleep through the night. You woke up again and again, shivering, pulling his sheets tighter around yourself, though it was futile.

The sun had just begun to rise when you woke again, still trembling, aches rattling in your hips and core. You shuffled and tossed as gently and quietly as possible, trying to find a more comfortable position to see if you could squeeze in just a little more sleep.

Kisuke stirred next to you, causing you to tense up and freeze. With your back turned, you couldn't see him, but sensed his movement, heard his tired sigh as he sat up and fumbled around for something. Then, there was more weight, more warmth, added to your body as he pulled another layer of blanket over your shivering form.

He breathed another sleepy sigh before stilling once more, so easily whisked back into his slumber. You pulled the new blanket up a little higher, shutting your eyes more contentedly, though you still couldn't drift off so easily, not with your mind already planning out your escape, calculating where your various clothes were scattered and how you were going to put them on and gather your keys as quietly as possible, how you were going to slip out without having to face him, without having to see what he looked like with the early light pouring in through his window.

You could hardly sleep again, not with how loud your mind was and how you wished for the safety of your own bed. You creeped out from under the covers, wincing and freezing when the bed creaked under you. After confirming that Kisuke was still sleeping, you kept moving, tip toeing along the floor as you pulled your panties back up, clipped your bra on, threw your clothes back over your drained figure. You clenched your keys tightly off of his bedside desk, careful not to let them jingle.

It was about to be a success as you headed for the door, ready to slip out into the morning without a trace.

But then he called your name, his voice hoarse with exhaustion, not asking for you, demanding you. You reluctantly turned to face him, laying on his back with his chest exposed, staring at you with an intensity that made your chest burn.

"Why are you always running from me?" Kisuke asked, keeping his voice level, no hint of what emotion hid behind his question.

"I'm not running." You stood like a deer in headlights. You were running, just not fast enough, and now you were going to get hit.

"You're sneaking out," he observed, tucking his hands behind his head. "You always do."

You never expected him to say anything about it. It wasn't the first time you'd been caught, but it was the first time he was calling you out. It made your cheeks burn with embarrassment, to be seen by him in this way. Why now?

"Sorry," was all you could manage.

"I was inside you last night," he reminded you.

"What is this?" You asked him, clutching your keys tighter.

"I'm just curious," he said, his lips pulling into a grin. Just like that, his wall was back up, the easygoing, nonchalant facade. "Go on. I won't hold you up any longer."

Your mind, body, and heart were at war. A sudden wave of sadness pummeled you, and you knew you had to get out quickly. You weren't going to cry in front of him, especially not when he had that stupidly handsome grin on his face.

So you ran without looking back, an emptiness rapidly expanding in your chest. You knew what this was - an addiction, a poison, like any other drug, a bad habit you couldn't quit. You clung to the little joys and pleasures - the names he called you when he was inside of you, the innocent kisses he peppered along your nose and forehead, the demand that you look him in the eye when you took him in your mouth or when he took you in his, the promise, when you came, that you were his. My girl. Mine. You replayed those moments in your head over and over again until they weren't enough, until you needed more again, another dose. And then, like any high, there was always the crash - like right now. Anxiety, sadness, numbness, and the cold. It was always so cold.

When you were in the confines of your car, you sobbed, clutching at your chest, wishing you were anybody but yourself. Maybe if you had just a little more love for yourself, a little more backbone, a little more respect, you wouldn't run. You'd demand affection, you'd demand warmth, and if you didn't receive it, you'd leave and never come back. You'd ask for more blankets instead of shivering violently to the point where you couldn't sleep. Maybe you'd even curl up against him. You'd touch him and let him touch you without it having to be sexual because yes, you were inside me.

I was inside you last night. It was incomplete. Where was the rest of what he wanted to say? I was inside you last night, and now you can hardly look at me? You can't stay longer? You can't even wake me up to tell me goodbye?

It made you cry angry tears now, cycling through the stages of grief all in one morning. How could he expect you not to run? He always noticed how cold you were too late. If only he had pulled you into his embrace instead of turning away, or give you clothing of his to stay warm. If only he had just made it clear that he wanted you to stay, that you weren't a burden or just a body taking up extra space in his bed. You may have been running, but he sure as hell wasn't doing much of anything to chase after you.

You had your own sentence to complete. You were inside me, and now you can't even hold me?! You can't even ask if I'm warm enough?! If I'm okay?!

Alone again, you piled on as many blankets as you wanted. You dried your tears and you caught up on the sleep you missed when you were too afraid of how big your heart was and too afraid that he would hear it beat for him. You ignored the biggest fear of all, that you'd never stop running, that it would always end in this way, with you, alone.

A/N: woke up cold, sore, and not in my own bed this morning + can't stop thinking about Kisuke, and what do ya know, it inspired me to write this !!! i'm a BIG irish exit girly, for better or worse :') (probs worse). i'm also extremely passive and avoidant, all this to say, this is definitely a personal piece. i promise im fine !! im much happier than i used to be, but alas, healing isn't linear and sometimes those bad habits like to creep back in.

to anyone who feels like they're alone, who feels like their heart's too big for this world and their passion too loud, i promise you, you're not alone, and please don't ever stop being the beacon of love and light that you are. take care of yourself. set boundaries. be vulnerable. be LOVE

<333

Food for Thought - Chapter 2: Smells like Aperol Spritz

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

Summary: You often wonder why you feel so alone even when you spend time with other people. An outsider even in a packed room. But a chance work project with Urahara Kisuke provides a strange comfort... so strange that you continue to spend time with him after your project is over.

CW: self-esteem issues, kissing, Urahara being a creep.

Read this chapter on AO3 here.

“My only request is that,” Urahara lowered his voice, bringing his face close to yours, “don’t invite anyone else – I want your undivided attention.”

You gave Urahara a confused look at his remark, “why would I invite other people? My kitchen is so small.”

A brief, yet awkward silence filled the space between you two before Urahara burst into laughter. When was the last time I laughed like this? He wondered to himself as he stopped. “I suppose you have a point.” He gave you a small smile, “so no surprise guests then, Ms. Popular” he teased, followed by a light chuckle.

You smiled fondly at his laugh. You noticed, since spending lunch with Urahara now, that he seemed more relaxed. He always gave a mysterious air around him, almost as if he was assessing everyone he interacted with, even you, but today felt a bit different.

No, I’m just overthinking things. You told yourself. You quickly checked your phone and saw your lunch break was nearing its end. “I’ll have to go now Urahara-san, but hopefully we can chat again tomorrow?” You asked, putting away your lunch.

“Sure,” he replied with a slight grin, “don’t keep me waiting.”

You waved him off as you headed back to your department. Your cheeks felt warm and your heart felt odd.

Sitting in your office chair, you sighed. I have a crush you thought with sadness. Of course you would have a crush on him, he was friendly, funny and intelligent. It didn’t help that he was handsome either. You wanted to reach out to your phone and text him something, anything, to validate your thoughts, until you heard your name.

You looked up to see Rukia there smiling at you, “I missed you at lunch today! Where have you been?” She asked, noticing the shocked and embarrassed look on your face.

“Oh, sorry.” You apologized, “I had lunch with Urahara-san today.”

“You’re not done with that project with him?” She asked, folding her arms. “It’s not like you to delay something like that.”

You shook your head, “oh it’s nothing like that”, you began to fiddle with your fingers, avoiding her gaze, “I appreciate his company so we have lunch together sometimes.”

Rukia clicked her tongue, “ahh, I see. He’s not being weird with you, is he?”

Your eyes widened with surprise, “not at all! He’s quite funny actually.” Rukia narrowed her eyes, but let you continue on, “he’s really insightful. I like talking to him.” You gave her an earnest smile.

Rukia sighed, “alright, but just keep your wits about you, ok?”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes, “sure, mother.” You said sarcastically. Rukia huffed, but you broke into laughter, “I know you’re concerned, but Urahara-san is quite normal.”

“Well I didn’t come here to talk about him,” she admonished, “I wanted to double check if you were still free for lunch tomorrow, you know the one that Ukitake-san is treating us to?”

“Oh right, thank you for reminding me!” You said, completely shocked that something like that slipped your mind.

“And I’m also here to show you something…” Rukia said, before reaching into her pants pocket, “ta dah!” She held out a pristine, limited edition Chappy keychain in the palm of her hand.

“You managed to find one!?” You gasped, “how?!” As you delicately picked it up with your hand, as if it would crumble with even the gentlest of touches.

Rukia grinned, a satisfied smile on her face, “I managed to win it in a blind box. Lady Luck favours the bold, you know.”

“And no one is as bold as you, Rukia” you chuckled. “But it’s cute, congrats!” You smiled at it, giving it a soft squeeze before handing it back to Rukia.

But before you and Rukia could continue with your conversation, your manager Hiyori peeked her head, giving you two a glare. Rukia gave you a polite smile, leaving you with your work… and your phone’s messaging app open on your texts to Urahara.

I’ll just let him know about tomorrow. It’s the least I can do. You thought to yourself as you began to type.

Kisuke mulled around in his laptop, losing interest in the code in front of him. His mind was preoccupied with thoughts of you. Spending time with you, as innocuous as lunch was, left him feeling uncomfortable and anxious. It was an uneasy feeling that he didn’t want to dwell on, but at the same time, he also craved your attention.

Maybe tomorrow he would be firmer in his approach with you. He would test himself. Maybe he was drawn to the physicality of your presence rather than mental chemistry building between you.

The line of code stared back at him while his brain ran through iterations of plans. He’ll have lunch with you tomorrow, maybe he would buy a pre-made lunch and lie that he attempted to make it for dinner. He would have you taste it; you would be amazed and proud, and he would lean in for a kiss.

Yes, that’s what he would do. He would test you to see if you would reciprocate. After all, most people wanted him for something, he would figure out what was your deal anyways.

Kisuke slowly began to type his code, until his phone vibrated in his pocket. It was a message from you. His heart quickened, which he just as quickly dismissed. His fingers immediately opened the text you sent, and his heart churned.

You sent an apology about tomorrow’s lunch, something about a director treating your unit. You sent a sad emoji to express your disappointment but then followed it up with “please send me a recipe when you have the time!”

Kisuke leaned into his seat. He was a patient man; he would figure your game out eventually.

Your heart raced as you sent the message off to Urahara. He had read receipts on, so you kept your phone glued to you as you waited for his response.

Why does it matter if he responds or not? I can’t change tomorrow.

But you felt strange, you quickly grabbed your phone and reiterated that the weekend was still on and reminded him to send you a recipe. You saw he read the message, but gave no response. Sighing, you leaned into your seat. It’s fine. It’ll be fine. There’s nothing going on.

Director Ukitake was a kind and generous man. He wanted to keep morale up in the company and occasionally treated units to luncheons. Sometimes they were catered if it was a larger unit, but a smaller division like your own would often be treated to the private section of a restaurant. And today was no exception.

You mingled with your colleagues as you saw in the corner of your eye Rukia talking with Kaien Shiba and Director Ukitake. The three of them seemed closer than you remembered, but you were proud of her. You knew Rukia worked hard to make a name for herself rather than relying on her brother-in-law’s connections. And it seemed that Director Ukitake and Shiba-san recognized her effort too with the way the three of them chatted away about proposals and projects coming.

You, on the other hand, felt slightly removed today. For some reason, you felt like you were miles away from everyone. Your mind wandered to what Urahara-san was doing. I hope he’s having a proper meal. You thought.

It was then your phone chimed, and you saw a reply from him. It was a link to a recipe for chicken and vegetable curry with udon. You couldn’t help but smile at your phone and send a reply, “this will work great! Bring some Tupperware” as you ended the text with a smile emoji.

Again, no response, but you saw the notification that he read your message. You felt a bit sad, but it wasn’t until Hanatarou waved his hand over your phone, that made you aware that you needed to get back to reality.

“Sorry, my brain’s been everywhere but here today.” You smiled sheepishly to Hanatarou.

“It’s alright, I hope it was something good! You seemed a bit sad today.”

You felt guilty for making Hanatarou worry, “no, I’m totally fine. Sometimes you just wake up on the wrong side of the bed, you know?” You laughed it off, trying to show him that you were ok. “Besides, it’s hard to be mad with food this good.”

Hanatarou chuckled, nodding his head in agreement as he watched you bite into your meal.

Maybe it was a good thing, but for the rest of the week, work had been more demanding than normal as of late. Your brain and thoughts were too preoccupied with incoming projects and deliverables, so you didn’t have time to dwell on Urahara-san.

But at the same time, it did hurt a tiny bit that he also didn’t text you either. Yet you tried to remind yourself that there was nothing more from this. He was just an acquaintance, a work friend at best. The two of you got along great, but an hour of conversation, with an occasional 15 minute coffee break, wasn’t really anything special. You kept reminding yourself there was nothing more and nothing less. You were doing him a service by teaching him how to cook… not to get your hopes up.

The debate between your mind and work and your feelings left you feeling exhausted. When the weekend rolled in, all you wanted to do was sleep and relax, completely forgetting that you didn’t tell what time Urahara-san could come by today.

You jolted awake and scrambled for your phone. “It’s been a busy week, but I hope you can still make it!” You texted him, followed by your address. “Let me know how much I owe you for groceries.”

You immediately noticed that he read the message, and just as quickly, he replied with “don’t worry about it.”

Your heart fluttered as you began to clean your home. Should you get drinks? A dessert? Your stomach was in knots at the thought of Urahara-san in your home. You felt jumpy at the slightest of sounds, from the hands ticking away at your clock, to the low humming buzz of your kitchen lights.

I need to relax. There’s nothing to worry or be anxious about. You told yourself repeatedly. You sipped some water when your phone beeped; Urahara had entered your buzzer code.

You felt your heart thump loudly in your ears as you waited for him. You splashed cold water on your face as you tried to relax. You looked over your counter and made sure knives and bowls were ready to prep food, and your stock pot was on the stove ready to be used.

You jolted again at the quick raps at your door. Peeking through the eyehole, you confirmed it was Urahara. You couldn’t help but laugh, was he wearing a bucket hat?

You opened the door and greeted him, surprised by his outfit of choice, a dark green shirt with grey sweats, with a large tote filled with groceries. “Green is a lovely colour on you.” You smiled at him, “I like your hat too!”

“Oh this ol’ thing? Had it for a long time now and it hasn’t let me down yet.” Kisuke chuckled, taking his hat off. “Thanks again for having me.” He smiled at you.

“Of course, it’s my pleasure.” You smiled politely. “Why don’t I take the groceries from you?”

“It’s fine, just lead me the way.” Urahara said as he motioned you forward.

Your kitchen was only a few steps away from your entryway, and as Kisuke placed the groceries on the table, you felt your cheeks warm realizing how large he was in comparison to your small kitchen.

Has he always been this big? You felt flustered, as he washed his hands. You noticed immediately the way his shoulders rolled under his shirt, and the muscles in his arms slightly flexing.

“Why don’t we get started then?” You asked, as you took out the contents of the tote.

“Tell me what to do and we’ll be done in no time.” Kisuke replied, giving you a smirk. You felt your cheeks grow even hotter.

“I think we should cut and marinate the chicken.” You stammered, avoiding his gaze, “everything else will be pretty easy afterwards.” Kisuke nodded. You ushered him to your cutting board as he took out the packaged chicken.

You stood next to him as he began to cut the chicken into bite-sized pieces. You were impressed by his knife skills.

“Are you sure you don’t know how to cook?” You remarked, as you watched him easily debone the chicken leg. “Your knife skills are impeccable.”

Kisuke shrugged his shoulders, “I’ve learned some surgical skills in my line of work.” As he quickly nicked a tendon off a joint, “I guess it’s a type of applied learning?” He tried to joke. But you didn’t laugh. It caught him off guard at how intensely you were watching his hands.

Next you instructed him to peel the potatoes, onions and carrots. The potatoes and carrots were done in relatively no time, but the onions were another story. You weren’t even the one cutting them, yet your eyes watered immediately. But Kisuke was unphased, as he sliced them away.

“What is your secret?” You asked, as you patted your eyes dry.

“My secret? For the onions?” He teased, “aren’t you the teacher? You’re supposed to be giving me tips.” He chuckled, finding it cute when you pouted at him.

“Fine, keep your secrets. I’ll find my own way.” You huffed.

With all the ingredients prepped and ready, you brought Kisuke to the stove and instructed him to turn on the heat to a particular setting. You explained the process and steps needed now, and how quickly it’ll come together. He nodded along, slightly hovering his hand over the pot to feel its heat. Once he thought it was ready, he put the chicken in to sear.

You were calm and patient with him, as he asked questions about certain steps. You were, to his surprise, not flirting with him, not teasing, or trying to seduce him. You were yourself and… he was enjoying it. He loved the way your eyes would look as you calmly explained a cooking technique to him, or why certain ingredients go in at certain times. Your patience was another surprise for him. He was certain the questions he asked would annoy you, but you took them in stride.

“Are you sure you don’t have a boyfriend?” Urahara teased, knowing full well you don’t after he researched you. “I’m sure you’d cook for him like this.”

Your cheeks felt warm again, “no…” you whispered, as you watched him sauté the vegetables. “I would like to though if I had one.” Urahara’s eyes perked up, but he remained collected.

“Well, more for me then.” He laughed, trying to put you at ease.

“I’m surprised you didn’t ask your partner to teach you, Urahara-san.” You replied, gaining the courage to look at him.

Without missing a beat, Kisuke responded with a chuckle. “I don’t have one.” He opened the curry roux box and broke in some pieces as you told him to, “lucky us, right?”

You were surprised by this. Why isn’t someone like him in a relationship? But before you could dwell on the thought further, you instructed him to slowly pour in the chicken stock. Soon your kitchen began to smell of fragrant spices of Japanese curry. Your mouth beginning to water at the thought of dinner soon to come.

“Good job, Urahara-san!” You smiled at him, then placed the lid over the pot. “We can let this simmer away.”

“You can call me Kisuke.” He replied, giving you a slight smile. “I’m in your home, no need for honorifics.” He grinned.

“Oh…” your cheeks might as well be sore with how flushed they were becoming, “if you insist!” You nervously chuckled, “why don’t I make us the udon and a simple salad while you have a seat?”

“Actually, if you could just tell me where the bathroom is, that would be great.”

You turned him around to your hallway and pointed him in its general direction. Kisuke nodded and took off, leaving you with your thoughts for the time being.

Ok, that wasn’t so bad! You realized.

While you were lost in thought, cutting vegetables for the side salad, Kisuke snuck into your bedroom.

It was wrong of him to be here, but he was curious. He was also never one to deny himself from his curiosity. He inspected your room and looked at what held your interests. He already took note of what books lined your shelves and what artwork was placed in your cozy home. Little things that would tell him more about you. He saw on your bed was a laptop. Exactly what he was looking for. He inserted a flash stick into its port and turned on the computer. Maybe your computer would tell him more.

Once his flash drive had run through the code, allowing him remote access on his end, he turned it off and placed it back on your bed. He took another look around your room, a thoughtful look on his face as he inspected everything.

Kisuke already thought you were a curious woman. A woman with many interests judging by the books and art pieces you collected. He looked at your vanity and saw different skincare products laid across, with dainty pieces of jewelry in a small dish.

A dark part of him also wanted to find something else. He pulled a drawer and saw your underwear neatly arranged. An assortment of panties, briefs and thongs. Kisuke couldn’t help but smile at the thought of you in nothing but a thong in the kitchen waiting for him.

Speaking of which, he knew he had to return before you went to get him.

Kisuke made his way back to your kitchen, watching your back as you stirred the pot. He wondered what you were thinking about as you stood there. He crept behind you quietly, before wrapping his arms around you, “it smells delicious.” He whispers into your ear.

You jolt immediately, deeper into his embrace. You were completely caught off guard by his presence, “I didn’t noti—”

With the way your head was angled to look up to him, Kisuke took his chance and pressed his lips against you. Your eyes widened in shock before he pulled away. “My cooking can’t be that bad!” He laughed, seeing the expression on your face before grabbing your wooden spoon out of your hand. He stirred the pot as you reeled in disbelief over what had happened, brushing your fingers across your lips. “And I see you already made the udon and salad.” Kisuke nodded his head approvingly, “thank you.”

You nodded your head, unsure of what to say.

“Why don’t you sit?” Kisuke asked, “these are the bowls we’ll be using, right?” Again, you nodded.

Kisuke prepared your bowl first, placing it right in front of you. He sat next to you at your small table, waiting for you to take the first bite.

You hesitantly picked up a piece of chicken with your chopsticks, blowing off the residual steam from it. You still were unsure of what to say, maybe food in my mouth will make this less awkward. You immediately shoved it into your mouth and your eyes went wide.

“This is delicious! You did a wonderful job” You exclaimed, as you went for another piece.

“Well, I had an amazing teacher.” Kisuke smiled, placing his hand on your thigh. You didn’t recoil at the touch, but your body felt a bit tense.

What should I do? You wondered, trying to understand what was happening. You hesitantly placed your hand on top of his, giving it a squeeze. “Or maybe you’re just an excellent student.”

“My teachers and professors would beg to differ, but I’ll accept your compliment nonetheless.” He chuckled, before eating his share.

The two of you ate in silence. You were too preoccupied with what had happened, and Kisuke was enjoying the look on your face.

“Ura—I mean Kisuke” you murmured, placing your chopsticks into your empty bowl, “why did you do that?”

“Do what?” He smiled.

You stared at him, disbelief washing over your face as your mind began to race even faster. “You kissed me!”

“And?”

“Why?”

“Why not?” He laughed.

“I – we’re not dating”

“So let’s date. I want to keep kissing you.” Kisuke teased, leaning into you.

Your face felt hot once again, “how about we have dessert” you tried to quickly get out of your seat. “I have some ice cream in my fre—”

“I brought a dessert for us to share actually.” Kisuke smiled, going back to his nearly empty tote. “I bought this chocolate cake for us to share.” You were shocked to see the bakery’s name, it was a fairly expensive and highly coveted store that sold limited pastries.

“I always wanted to try one of their cakes!” You remarked.

“Then let’s dig in.” Kisuke smiled, already knowing where you kept your forks. Kisuke opened the box and cut a piece of the cake with his fork, before putting it to your face, “you should have the first bite.”

You were embarrassed but opened your mouth as you ate the piece of cake. Your eyes widened at the rich flavour of the chocolate, and the moist layers of cake.

“It’s that good?” Kisuke smirked, enjoying your reaction. You nodded your head and took a forkful for him, placing it by his mouth.

He closed his eyes and leaned forward, wrapping his lips around the utensil. You couldn’t look away, but felt dirty at what you had just seen. Flustered, you put the fork down, but saw that Kisuke had a smudge of icing near his mouth.

“Oh you got some on you,” you murmured, and out of habit, you reached towards him to wipe it away. But as soon as you held up your hand, Kisuke pulled you into his lap, causing you to shriek… except that it was muffled, with his lips on you once again.

Kisuke’s grip around your hips was firm, as you stilled in his lap. You didn’t know what to do, as you clung on to Kisuke as he pressed his lips against yours. You felt his tongue swipe at your mouth, causing you to gently open your mouth. You tasted the chocolate off his lips, before you pulled away. You took deep breaths as you saw Kisuke’s cheeks grow a tint of pink.

You licked your lips, unsure of what the feeling was coursing through your body. The only thing you knew was that you wanted more. With a jolt of courage, you placed your lips gently on Kisuke’s. Your thoughts were racing, but you didn’t care.

You felt wanted. With Kisuke’s warm hand slipping under your shirt, you also felt needed, and you were just as needy. You pulled away from him to catch your breath. Kisuke’s grey eyes were transfixed on you, staring directly at you with such intensity you had never seen before.

It scared you. And your anxiety crawled its way back into your brain, as you got off his lap.

Laughing nervously, “well this was fun!” You immediately went to grab the bowls and utensils and place them in your sink. “I’ll pack the rest for you to take home.”

Kisuke narrowed his eyes, watching your demeanour shift. You weren’t exactly cold with him, but he sensed a wall that no amount of kissing or flirting would break.

“I’ll help,” Kisuke calmly said, as he went to wash the dishes. “It’s the least I can do.”

“No, you’ve done plenty!” You exclaim, “I can’t make a guest do the dishes.” As you tried to pull him away from the sink, but he was surprisingly strong and sturdy.

Kisuke chuckled as he steady your body, “it’s fine.” He gave a quick peck on your forehead, your face heating up once again, “you having to pack the food away is more than enough.”

“Ok…” you sighed, resigning to portion out the rest of the food.

You ensured Kisuke had everything he brought back in his tote, making sure he didn’t forget anything.

“Thank you for the cake and company tonight.” You murmured, avoiding his gaze.

“And thank you for teaching me how to make curry udon.” Kisuke smiled, “hopefully we can do this again?”

You nodded your head.

“I’ll see ya at work tomorrow then.” Kisuke grinned, his bucket hat covering his eyes, leaving you unsure of what look he was giving you. The two of you waved each other off as he departed down your elevator.

Locking your door, you slumped.

You were so exhausted, and now you had to deal with work tomorrow! At least you didn’t need to worry about lunch.

Thank you for reading!! I want to thank @worldsetfree for beta'ing this chapter for me. The smut is coming soon!!

Food for Thought - Chapter 1: Blini with caviar and crème fraiche

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

Summary: You often wonder why you feel so alone even when you spend time with other people. An outsider even in a packed room. But a chance work project with Urahara Kisuke provides a strange comfort... so strange that you continue to spend time with him after your project is over.

Content warning: Reader is written with self-esteem issues/insecure thoughts, food is a large part of this story. Kisuke will become a yandere in this, he is also promiscuous. This chapter has no smut, but it will become very NSFW soon.

Read on AO3 here.

Chapter 1: Blini with caviar and crème fraiche

“You’re still up for karaoke tonight, right?” Your co-worker Hanatarou asked, as he peered over your cubicle.

You smiled brightly at him, eyes filled with mirth, “of course! I don’t back down from a challenge, especially one from Madarame” you snickered. Hanatarou laughed as he thanked you again for agreeing to come with him to a singing showdown. You knew Hanatarou since you started working at the Senjumaru & Hikifune Diagnostics Company. While you and Hanatarou were new in your roles, you sensed that there was an ongoing rivalry between your department and Madarame Ikkaku’s - the marketing team.

But before you could figure out your song list for the night, your manager, Sarugaki Hiyori shouted for you, “Oi! C’mere quick. I got a new project for you, newbie.”

It had been over two years since you started your job here, but you couldn’t help but laugh at Sarugaki still calling you “newbie”, but the casual behaviour you two shared was something you appreciated in your role.

“I got a new project for you.” Hiyori explained, walking you towards the meeting room. “The higher ups were impressed with how you dealt with the immune checkpoint inhibitors assessment.”

“Thank you, but it was a team effort after all.” You explained, which was true to a degree, but you were the lead analyst on the project.

“Don’t be so modest,” Hiyori scoffed, “anyways they want you to do a review on the prefecture’s medical imaging inventory.”

“I see, but that’s not my area of expertise, wouldn’t Akon or Nemu be better fits?” You asked, knowing that their team, led by Kurotsuchi Mayuri, were the health technology team.

“In all other cases, yes, but they turned down this project.” Hiyori huffed, entering the empty meeting room. “They said some bullshit about other projects of theirs being of higher priority.”

Well, that’s fair you thought, but Hiyori’s face looked like she didn’t buy it. “From the look on your face, you don’t think it’s true.” You laughed as she clenched her notebook.

“It’s because they don’t want to work with the consultant tied to the project.” Hiyori explained, her scowl growing deeper. “Not like I want him to work with you either.”

“I’ve worked with frustrating consultants in the past, Sarugaki-san.”

“I know, I know” Hiyori sighed, looking dejectedly at the window. “This guy’s annoying, and frankly, just plain weird.” She admitted. “I worked with him for a short while, he wasn’t completely a bad guy then. He just gets on my nerves.” She explained, honestly.

“Well, if you were able to tolerate him, then it should be fine.” You said, wondering what type of person would not only upset Hiyori (who was already quick to anger) and Kurotsuchi-san (who was already easy to annoy). You figured this person must have been normal to some degree, since the two people who have worked with him were a bit odd in their own ways.

Your manager explained in more detail the work you’d be doing and the finer technical details of the expectations senior management had for you. “The consultant is an expert in this field, which is why he’ll be assisting you on this. Apparently, he used to work for the national health board way back when.” Hiyori explained, as you diligently took notes.

“Anyways, that’s about it. I sent him a meeting invite to this board room in 5 minutes. I’ll email you everything we shared for your records. I gotta bounce, but send me a message if anything comes up.” Hiyori waved you goodbye as you sat alone in the room.

You checked your phone, scrolling through your calendar for the week. You were relatively social at work, with colleagues sending you invites to things to see, do and eat. You didn’t see the harm in participating, and you weren’t much for drinking to begin with, so you made sure your colleagues got home safe. Either way, you were appreciative of them inviting you out.

Five minutes turned to ten, and still no show of this infamous consultant.

You continued scrolling through your phone, going through your social media accounts. Acquaintances from school and previous jobs, were sharing engagements, wedding photos and many other milestones. You couldn’t help but smile sadly, with cold, belittling words ringing through your head.

This stuff isn’t meant for me anyways. You thought, as you continued to scroll through your feed.

It wasn’t until you saw the time, that almost half an hour had passed. You began to type a message to Hiyori about the no-show consultant, until he barged through the door.

Pale, disheveled blonde hair, and what you assume a white button down and a poorly tied dark green tie around his neck under a brown sweater, paired with dark grey slacks.

He immediately grabbed your hand and gave you an intense handshake. The suddenness threw you off and confusion was evident across your face.

“Ah, sorry about that! I’m Urahara Kisuke the technology consultant, and I suppose you’re the analyst I’m working with?” Urahara-san asked.

You nodded your head, while you flexed your poor hand that was caught off guard by his tight handshake. You introduced yourself and offered him a seat next to you. The two of you went over the technical details and scheduled to meet again tomorrow before your lunch break. Your phone began to buzz as your coworkers and friends began to barrage you with texts.

“My my, you really are popular.” Urahara teased, as he stared at your phone with curious eyes.

You couldn’t help but feel embarrassed from his comment, “no, not really” you explained, “I agreed to karaoke tonight, that’s all!”

Urahara gave you a soft smile, “that must be nice. Karaoke sounds wonderful. Have a great time.” You thanked him for his time today and rushed off to your coworkers.

He wasn’t so bad. You thought, as your coworkers waved at you near the elevators. You told them to wait for you in the lobby as you grabbed your belongings, unaware that Urahara was watching you from the hallway.

The karaoke bar was lively. Drinks were ordered, snacks were shared and laughter erupting from your private booth. You smiled at your friends who sung along badly to old pop hits, and laughed as they sang dramatic renditions of tearful ballads. You sang along, clapping with them, until you felt a gentle tap on your shoulder.

“I heard you met Urahara Kisuke today.” Rukia quietly whispered.

You stopped clapping and turned to face her as the rest of the room kept singing along.

“Oh yes I did Kuchiki-san! He was quite polite and knowledgeable. He really knows his stuff.”

Rukia gave you a puzzled expression, “really? I heard he’s kind of shady.”

“It’s funny you say that, my manager said that as well, and she mentioned Kurotsuchi-san saying something similar.” Rukia’s face turned to one of concern, “but I’m going to be meeting with him for the rest of the month, so I’ll tell you if anything interesting comes up.” You laughed, trying to lighten the mood.

“Ok, but just be careful. I heard from Rangiku at Payroll that they weren’t able to fire him because he has deep connections to some of the executives.”

That surprised you. The company itself was old, nearing 50 years (or so they say). You didn’t know much about Urahara Kisuke as his field of work was different from yours. You made a mental note to look into him later tonight. “What was it that made them consider firing him?” You were curious to know why everyone you’ve spoken to about him, had such poor opinions of the man.

“I’m not sure, I heard he was doing insider trading?”

“Really!?” You exclaimed, “wouldn’t the cops be involved then?” Pointing out the discrepancy within the rumour.

“Oh… yeah..” Rukia was stumped, “I’ll ask Rangiku next time I see her then. Maybe she doesn’t know either.”

“Or maybe it’s just a baseless rumour?”

Rukia gave you a look of uncertainty, “just be careful around him, ok? Rumours start from somewhere you know…”

You laughed her comment off and treated her to favourite snack. You were left with an uncomfortable feeling the rest of the night and excused yourself to leave early.

At home, you looked into Urahara Kisuke. Several of his papers came up, all of them focused on some aspect of biomedical engineering. You saw a Kurotsuchi-san’s name come up frequently as a collaborating author, and another person, “Aizen Sosuke” come up. You ran a quick search on him and saw he was working as a professor in the top university in the country. Nothing else came up in your search though, which left you more questions than answers.

You always tried to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, and Urahara-san was no different, maybe it’s just a baseless rumour after all. Whatever the case may be, work was work, and you resigned yourself to be professional and complete the project to the best of your abilities.

You had meal prepped your lunch for tomorrow then prepared for bed. You still couldn’t shake off everyone’s comments today, so you hoped sleep would wash the thoughts away.

It had been several weeks now of meeting with Urahara-san. Your time with him made you doubt the comments made by your colleagues and friends when you first started the project. Now it was nearing the end of it, and if anything, if someone were to ask you to describe “Urahara Kisuke”, you would say he was a “curious, yet brilliant man who tries to be funny.” You laughed at yourself when you remembered the terrible “jokes” Urahara-san made, but he was certainly an interesting person.

Today was your last meeting with him though, and a small part of you was sad. You liked spending time with him. You watched him skim your report on the laptop screen with an intense focus, typing in tracked changes sparsely in between.

“I’m impressed!” Urahara said to you, “you really nailed this review. I know the execs will love it.”

You smiled at his compliment, “I’m flattered, Urahara-san, but it’s your vast knowledge that really helped me. I wouldn’t have even known to look in the formulary database and disability policies!” You said, shaking your head.

“They really are right about you.” Urahara remarked in a serious tone.

You looked at him with curiosity.

Urahara chuckled and in a teasing tone, “that you’re incredibly studious and hardworking! I barely did anything.”

“Well I have to say people are wrong about you.” You beamed at him, “people were telling me all sorts of rumours about you, and to be cautious.”

Urahara raised his eyebrows, but let you continue on.

“But you’re actually quite friendly and diligent.” You give an awkward laugh, “and I’ll miss working with you.”

Urahara looked surprised. He had never heard that before. Most people found him, in some ways, too difficult to work with. His unorthodox approach to analyzing and finding results, and dubious ethics, made finding people to work with slim to none. Yet here you are.

They really are right about you. He thought to himself. It bothered him, to some degree. Initially he wondered what angle you would be playing at while working with him. Would you fish him for gossip? Would you be a bother and ask about his past research? An annoyance who wanted access to his connections, his work?

No, none of that came up. You approached him with sincerity and kindness, something he wasn’t dealt with in his years of working as a researcher.

“Urahara-san, if you have some time,” you ask, your face growing warm, “would you care to join me for lunch?” To say he was startled was an understatement, but he accepted.

“Is that all you’re going to eat, Urahara-san?” You ask, noticing his canned coffee and prepackaged rice ball.

“Oh this,” Urahara laughed, “I had a hearty breakfast, so I wanted a light lunch.” He lied to you, while wearing a large grin on his face.

“If you want, you can have some of my food.” You offered to him. “I don’t think that’ll last you through the afternoon.” You gave him a sheepish smile.

Urahara’s eyes widened, but he chuckled, waving you off. But you were full of surprises, you pushed forward your lunch to him, “why don’t you have some of mine?” Your face grew hot as you began to ramble, “I know I may not look it, but I’m a pretty decent cook.”

He was hesitant, but the earnest tone in your voice, and the way you avoided his eyes told him enough. He picked up the utensil and took some food for himself.

Urahara’s eyes widened but quickly shifted. “My, you certainly know your way around the kitchen!” He joked, a slight smile on his face as he noticed the way your eyes avoided him, but the pleased smile on your face.

It felt unusual to him, to enjoy someone’s company like this, it put him on guard. He would listen to you talk, watch your reactions, and try to rationalize what you wanted out of him. But before he could make a definitive conclusion, your lunch break was over.

“Thank you for spending your lunch break with me, Urahara-san.” You said softly, “if you’re free the rest of the week, I’d like to do this again.”

His mind raced, maybe you were interested in something more personal from him, his under-the-table work, maybe you were sent by Kurotsuchi or the higher ups to investigate him.

But a small part of his brain knew that wasn’t right, he’d have to get to the bottom of this. “Yes, I’d love that.” He gave you a smile.

Two weeks had gone by where, for the most part, you and Urahara had lunch together at work. You were dismayed by his lack of lunches some days. He would say he was too busy to prepare something, or having a larger breakfast made his appetite quite small. But you had your suspicions.

“Urahara-san, what’s your favourite meal to cook?”

Urahara made an exaggerated sigh and cupped his chin, “why lately, it’s been what you’ve shared with me at lunch.”

You couldn’t help but laugh, “I’m serious! I’d love to know what you make. I want to try new recipes.” You gave him a sincere smile.

It’s what bothered Urahara about you, you were too sincere, too earnest with someone like him. He suspected you didn’t know the actual rumours surrounding him, and a part of him hopes you never do. His heart, much to his dismay, would flutter seeing you smile, seeing your eyes light up. He would watch, as he wandered around the company’s different units, how you interacted with other coworkers and colleagues. You were polite and friendly. So… disarming.

Urahara let out a sigh, it would be so easy to let you go if you were only spending time with him for nefarious reasons. He wouldn’t have had any qualms about leaving you high and dry. But even on the weekends, he would send you a short text, something about how your weekend was going.

A small part of him was growing jealous at how you would hang out with some of your coworkers after work. Your social circle seemed so large compared to him… but he wanted to be at the centre.

“I don’t have one. I can’t say I’ve cooked much for myself.” Urahara murmured, scratching his head.

You looked at him with shocked eyes, “no way! Not even scrambled eggs?”

Urahara let out a laugh, “ok, maybe one.” He looked at your now empty bento that he had nibbled on, “if you have the time…”

You looked at him with such an eager expression, the knot in his stomach tightened, as he tried to ignore the thudding of his heart. He wouldn’t act on feelings; this was a plan to let you slip up what your real reasons were to spend time with him.

“Would you teach me how to cook?”

And as he suspected as much, and denying his own relief from your words, you agreed. “Why don’t you pick a recipe you want to try and you can come over to my house on Sunday?”

“Sure,” Urahara said, his brain already laying down plans to ensnare you, “but won’t your boyfriend mind if I come over?” He asked, with a hesitant look on his face.

“If I did have one, maybe!” You laughed, “You don’t have to worry about that, trust me.” You looked away from him, a sad look on your face. Urahara narrowed his eyes, but before he could ask more, your smile was back, “just let me know what ingredients to buy.”

“Don’t worry about that.” Urahara said, “I’ll bring the ingredients. It’s the least I can do since you’re offering your kitchen.”

“Oh alright! Thank you for going through the trouble.” You smiled, “let me know how much it is and we can split the bill.” Urahara laughed at your comment, you really were so honest.

“No, it’s on me. Especially after feeding me lunch these past few weeks.”

You let an awkward laugh, before avoiding his gaze. “My only request is that,” Urahara lowered his voice, bring his face close to yours, “don’t invite anyone else – I want your undivided attention.”

THANKS FOR READING MY FIRST CHAPTER!!

I've already have drafted over 5 chapters for this story and I have an ending in mind for it too. As a personal goal, I want to complete this, so I hope you join me along for this ride!