it’s true i do this daily
Eda:
Eda stans:
Jaw drops on floor, eyes pop out of sockets with the accompaniment of trumpets, heart beats out of chest. Takes out a boxing glove and hits self 17 times, pant like a dog as tongue hangs out of mouth, WOOF WOOF WOOF, CONTINUE TO YELL AWOOGA AWOOGA AT TOP OF LUNGS, PULLS CHAIN ON TRAIN WHISTLE THAT HAS APPEARED NEXT TO YOU, SLAMS FISTS ON TABLE, RATTLING ANY PLATES AS FIREWORKS SHOOT OUT OF THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD. WIPES COMICALLY LARGE BEAD OF SWEAT OFF OF FOREHEAD. TURN TO AUDIENCE AND SAY IN A 1930S NEW YORK ACCENT “HOT MAMA, NOW THATS A DAME”