An match of intellect between the Turk's dumbest member vs Soldier's dumbest?
I'm swapping dumb for naive, because lbr the level of intelligence it takes to be a SOLDIER or a Turk is unmatched.
Tseng: Alright. I've got a stack of question cards. I'll read the question, whoever hits the buzzer first and answers correctly gets a point. Clear?
Zack & Reno: Yes!
Tseng: Good. Question one—
*Reno hits the buzzer*
Tseng: I haven't read it yet.
Reno: Yeah, but I got the vibe. The answer is cheese.
Tseng: I will stab you in the neck with this question card.
Reno:
Tseng: ...Starting over. Question one—What materia—
*BZZT!*
Zack: Fire!
Tseng: Correct.
Reno: HUH!? He just guessed!
Zack: Gut instinct, man. Years of SOLDIER training.
Tseng: Next question—Who—
*BZZT!*
Reno: Sephiroth!
Tseng: ⏤was the founder of Shinra Electric Power Company?
*Zack hits the buzzer*
Zack: Sephiroth!
Tseng: Forgive my language, by why the fuck would Sephiroth found the Shinra Electric Power Company?
Zack: Wasn't he involved at least? Dude's been here since forever.
Reno: Maybe he got bored one day and was like "You know what this world needs? More electricity!" Then BAM, Shinra was born!
Tseng: He was literally raised IN a Shinra lab.
Reno: Why are we dismissing time travel?
Tseng: BECAUSE IT DOESN'T FUCKING—*Tseng takes a deep breath*—because it doesn't exist, Reno. Now, moving onto the next question. Suppose our fellow operative suffers a mental breakdown while on a mission, expresses intent to harm others, and plans to commit arson—what are the correct procedures?
*A portal rips open mid-air. Time traveler Cloud steps out, wordlessly hands Zack a folded paper, then disappears back into the portal as if this is completely normal*
*Zack unfolds the paper, scans it, then calmly hits the buzzer*
Zack: You beat his ass.
Tseng: