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Might Put The Date In Tags Now Instead - Blog Posts

3 months ago
i am not an angry person
or at least, i dont think i am, 
not anymore, but 
im sorry that i was

im sorry that people see me as an open palm
a closed fist, something aching to bite
im sorry that there are people who 
would rather choke down chlorine 
than choke out my name, and 
im sorry that i would do the same

im sorry for the people who only saw 
my life through databases and the scars covering everything ive got, and 
im sorry that i couldn't have been
anything more than an open wound
im sorry that i didnt even try

im sorry for all the goodbyes that are rotting in
emails i dont even remember the passwords to
im sorry that i hope you wouldnt recognise me now,
and that i cant recall your faces, let alone names
im sorry that i was too scared to end it,
im sorry that there wasn't anything to end

im sorry that blood on my hands isn't mine, 
but it will be, it will be and im 
sorry i couldnt make everything better
im sorry i couldnt make anything at all.

a parasites lungs are filled with apologies, none of them spoken // forgive me


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