I completely understand everything you said in this post and it's so fucking valid.
Like I could brake my arm and would probably try to hide it. I've been told it was unreasonable whenever I do this but I just can't help it, it's to scary to try to tell someone something.
Like once I threw up and walked around in circles for 3 hours outside my mom's room sense I was scared is get in trouble for some reason? Like I knew I wouldn't get in trouble it's just the 1% possibility that I do freaks me the fuck out.
Or with getting my period I didn't tell her. I had already read books and watched videos that mentioned it so I just knew what I was supposed to do. And like 2 months later she asked me if I had gotten my period get and I just said no? I have no idea why I said no it would have been much easier to just say yes but instead I was to scared and said no.
in conclusion anxiety sucks.
(: