His Dark Materials X Reader - Blog Posts

I cried so much seeing Lee again and now reading this story....😭😭😭😭

Lee Scoresby x Reader-Grief Is The Price That's Paid For Love

It's been a while since I've written a story for Lee but I've been re-watching His Dark Materials (+binging the new season!) and I couldn't resist writing this.

I hope you all enjoy this! 💛

Warnings: Grief

His Dark Materials spoilers below!!

“Lee…” Y/n whispered, her eyes blurring with tears as she raised her hand to his cheek.

He still looked like Lee; even down to his iconic cowboy hat, and his eyes, they still had a flicker of mischief in them. But it was nothing like the spark that once lived there and his skin was cold to the touch and graying, nothing like how it was before.

 Because he was dead.

 He was dead… 

She had hoped she wouldn’t see him here; but in her heart she knew something had happened to him. She couldn’t explain it; but for a while now she had just felt this dull ache in her heart. 

That’s why she followed Lyra and Will to The Land Of The Dead…she hoped that the ache in her heart was just from missing him as they had not seen each other in so long. 

Her dæmon, Y/d/n felt it too; and although it was excruciatingly painful for them to be apart; Y/d/n understood why.

But now, she had her answer. The man she loved, the man she planned to have a future with, to share adventures with, to have a family with and to grow old with, was standing right in front of her, nothing more than a ghost. 

“Oh, sweetheart,” Lee breathed, leaning into her touch, before swooping her up in his arms, holding her closer than ever before. He never thought he’d get this opportunity; the chance to hold his Y/n in his arms again, so he was going to savor every last second he possibly could.

They stayed like that for a while,  knowing that this would be one of the very last times they’d be able to hold each other.

“What are you doing here?” he questioned softly, lifting his head from her shoulder to look at her.

Her eyes were puffy and bloodshot from the silent tears she’d been crying, had he not already been dead, he knew his heart probably would’ve shattered there and then at the sight of his Y/n. 

“I had a feeling something had happened to you…I just…I needed…I need to know,” Y/n answered back, trying desperately (and failing)  to hold back her tears as she held onto him, never wanting to let him go. 

“I’m sorry, my love,” he whispered, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead; his hands cupping either side of her face. 

“Come on, no tears,” he sniffled, trying to hold back his own tears as his thumbs wiped away her fallen ones. 

“How can I not cry?” Y/n asked; allowing the tears to fall from her eyes, “You’re dead, Lee…you’re dead…and I wasn’t there-”

The words that fell from her mouth just made her cry more as realisation and guilt washed over her. 

“If you were there you would’ve died too,” Lee soothed; his fingers softly rubbing either side of her neck. 

“At least we’d be together,” 

“Sweetheart,” Lee began, stopping himself for a moment to blink away the tears that were threatening to fall from his eyes, “I love you and I wish we could stay together but we can’t. I need you to live for me; go on all those adventures we planned to,”

He knew how much pain she was in. 

He felt it. 

He wanted nothing more than to walk out of this world, alive and with the woman he loved, to live the future they’d dreamed of. 

But he couldn’t. 

He knew that all they could do now was say goodbye.

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