Gravity Falls Fanfiction - Blog Posts

Updated my gravity falls oc fic a couple of times if y'all wanna check it out. Don't wanna spoil anything.

Updated my gravity falls fic. Enjoy. (^._.^)ﾉ

Updated my gravity falls oc fic. (^._.^)ﾉ

Updated my gravity falls oc fic. Tell me what y'all think. :3

Updated my gravity falls oc fic. Tell me what y'all think.

Toodles!

Made a Gravity Falls OC fic. Tell me what y'all think.

This is how I take notes for story's, and then I wonder why my writing is shit.

 — — — —

-wakes up human.

-*panik*.

-oh shit what do i do. -

haha this isnt real. -that fucking newt

-but actually wtf do i do

-im in gravity falls

-fuck fuck fuck fuck

-THAT FUCKING NEWT

-gets hit bye a car

 ~~~~~~

-ford fineds his half-dead body

 ~~~~~~

-fuck fuck fuck

-murder 

-i allmost died

-exstitinial crisis

-bathroom breakdown

-exstitintial crisis pt2

-its fine

-evhill

-ending ig

part two of Stan being a single father to an adopted child

this purely exists for the two people who asked for it. @masontheevildm and @kid-in-th3-k0rn3r

hope this lives up to your expectations.

part one is here

Stan takes his small child to gravity falls

The road to gravity falls was a long one. Stan was going to be driving most of the day. He thought about leaving Lola at home, Ford sounded unstable and he wouldn’t be able to handle it if she got hurt. But the truth was, Lola didn’t deal well with separation. He tried to put her in daycare when they first settled down in Forks, but she wouldn’t have it. The first day was hell and the second was even worse. She was scared Stan was going to abandon her. Stan knew he had to deal with the separation anxiety some time, but that time wasn’t now. 

Lola was strapped into the passenger seat of the Stanleymobile. She was too small for it, but Stan never cared for road safety laws, besides seatbelts of course. She bought a notebook with her coloured pencils, and her favourite stuffed animal. A blue axolotl plush that she called “Lizard” that Stan bought for her from some tourist trap. She sat, colouring, as Stan drove down the bumpy country roads.

“Stan, where are we going?” Lola asked, “Lizard wants to know.”

“Does he now” Stan replied, “ well if Lizard wants to know, and not Lola, I guess I’ll just have to speak lizard.”

Stan then proceeded to make the most obscene ‘lizard’ noises known to man, causing Lola to burst out in a fit of giggles and drop her pencils. Stan couldn’t help but smile.

“Ok now Lola wants to know” she said.

Stan’s smile faltered. He never really explained his family to her. Really the only family that she knew of was Stan’s mother, and that was a complete accident. Thinking about his family didn’t fill Stan with particularly happy thoughts. Family always left you behind, to fend for yourself. No one exemplified that like Ford.

But years ago, when Lola was a toddler, too young to remember, he promised to always be honest with her. She had just realised Stan lied to everyone else, and was scared that he was lying to her about loving her. That didn’t matter much to Lola these days, now that she understood why Stan would lie so much. But it stuck with Stan. He promised to protect her, and that meant she had to trust him. That meant honesty, at least to him.

“Well Lola,” Stan started with a deep breath, “we’re going to see my brother.”

“You have a brother? Since when?”

“Since I was born, kiddo. We’re twins. Anyway, I have 2 brothers.”

“Why is your brother a secret?” Lola looked at Stan with wide, curious eyes. Stan did not feel ready for this.

“We- well we had a fight. Haven’t spoken since.”

“Since when?”

“Since before ya were born, ya little twerp.”

Lola was quiet, deep in thought. She seemed to be having some sort of mental conversation with Lizard. Then she looked up at Stan.

“Stan… was it your brother on the telephone?” She asked, a hint of nervousness seeping through.

“Yeah, sweetheart. That was my brother. I think”

Lola clung onto Lizard tight, and looked out at the snow.

“He sounded scary” she said, barely a whisper.

Stan and Lola had gotten into dangerous situations before. He knew it took a lot to scare her. She was good at putting on a brave face. Whatever Ford had said to her on the phone must’ve freaked her out a lot.

“You’re right, Lo. He did sound scary. Did he say anything to you? Anything in particular that scared you?”

Lola was tearing up now, as she nodded. Stan decided to push a little further.

“Sweetie, can you tell me what he said?”

The road was quiet for a bit. Stan didn’t say anything. He wanted Lola to have space to process. Then, like a leaky tap, she spoke.

“He said… my real mum and dad… he said they hated me… so they sent me away…”

Stan stopped the car and looked at Lola. She avoided his gaze.

“Lola, look. I didn’t know your dad, so I can’t speak for him. But I know your mum loved you SO much.”

Lola spoke into her plush, tears in her eyes. “Then why did she go away?”

Stan pulled her into a hug.

“Aw, baby. She didn’t want to go, she wanted to take care of you but she couldn’t. See she was sick. Sick in a way that made it so hard for her to get better.”

Lola didn’t say anything, just stayed clutched onto Stan’s chest. Stan stroked her hair, whispered ‘I love you’s into the air hoping she would catch them. Eventually, Lola crawled out of Stan’s arms and put her seatbelt back on.

“Stan, why are we going to see your scary brother?” She whispered.

“Well, Lola. I think he isn’t okay right now. I reckon he needs help. So we’re going to help him, whether he wants it or not.”

“Is he sick like my mama was?”

“…

I sure hope not”

Lola considered this for a while. Stan was clutching the steering wheel hard, his knuckles going white. He couldn’t deny that Ford sounded… off. Drugs would make sense. But the thought of Ford ruining his life on drugs was terrifying in an of itself.

Lola looked back at Stan.

“Why are we helping your scary brother?” She says, brows furrowed, “he’s mean, and I don’t know him.”

“Cus he’s my brother and I love him, even if he’s being mean.”

Lola didn’t look like she believed him, so he continued.

“Look, sweetheart. When you love someone, ya gotta do your best ta help them. Ya don’t stop loving someone if they’re being mean or if ya haven’t spoken to ‘em in a decade. If someone ya love needs help, ya do ya best to help them, ok?”

With that, Stan reached out and ruffled Lola’s hair. 

“Would you love me if I was mean?” Asked Lola. She was looking at Lizard.

Stan chuckled. “Kid, the stars would have to fall outta the sky for me to stop loving ya.”

Lola had fallen asleep by the time they reached Portland. Halfway to gravity falls. It was around noon, so Stan figured they should probably stop for lunch. And ask around, see if anyone actually knew where gravity falls was. He only had a vague idea based on what his mother told him.

Luckily, Stan knew a guy. An old buddy, Ferg, who delivered eggs all across Oregon. He also was the guy to go to for forged documents in the Pacific Northwest. He was the one to get Stan and Lola their current IDs. He stopped by Ferg’s garage, where he was working on his truck. Stan didn’t want to wake up Lola, so he picked her up and they walked into the garage.

“Hey, Ferg!” Stan yelled. Ferg turned around, a wide smile on his face.

“Well if it isn’t my old pal Stanley!” Ferg replied with the same enthusiasm. ”How are ya! How’s the kid?”

“We’re alright, Ferg. But look, we’re kinda in a rush. This ain’t a social visit.”

Ferg nodded, seeming to understand the edge in Stan’s voice. He led Stan to a small table, offering a seat to Stan. They sat, and Ferg gave Stan a cup of coffee.

“What ya need, Stan. Your cover get blown?”

“No, nothing like that. It’s more a family emergency.”

Ferg’s face twisted with concern. “Family? Last I checked, ya said you had none.”

Stan looked away.

“Look. Ferg. I told ya before, I’m not gonna give you my entire story. I just need to know how to get to Gravity Falls.”

Ferg paused, and glared at Stan.

“That hick town? Strangest place I’ve been. What could possibly be there that’s got us so worked up?”

A beat of silence stretched for eternity before Stan answered.

“My brother.”

Stan had told Ferg the vaguest details about Ford. It was hard not to, they got drunk together on Colorado in 1974, and ended up in jail together. And Ferg was a personable guy. It kinda just spilled out of Stan, really. He was pretty sure he had cried. Which explained the face Ferg was giving him right now.

“Ya brother ya don’t talk to? The one you said left ya behind?”

“He needs me, Ferg.”

Ferg just nodded. He got a peice of paper and started mapping out a route, making small talk.

“Your Lola sure can sleep through anything” he said. 

“Ha, yeah. She’s a heavy sleeper.”

“Takes after her Pa.”

Stan felt himself blush.

“look, Ferg. I told ya, I ain’t her Pa. She has a real dad somewhere out there”

“You’re her dad in all the ways that matter, Stan. You raised her.”

Stan shrugged.

“I killed her ma. It’s the least I could do.”

Ferg gave Stan a strange look. He had always insisted that Lola’s mother wasn’t Stan’s fault. Not that he was there.

“Stanley,” Ferg started, “you can’t only be looking after Lola because of some old sense of guilt. You’re looking after her cus you love her”

“She’s hard not to love. But you can’t deny it. She deserves better than me.”

Ferg gave Stan a steely glare. “If you really believed that, ya would’ve left her to the hospital.” 

He finished up the directions and handed them to Stan.

“Good luck with ya brother, Stan. Tell Lola I said hi when she wakes up, alright?”

And with that, they were back on the road. Stan stopped at a drive through, bought some greasy chicken, the kind Lola loved, and left some in the back for her to eat. They wouldn’t get to gravity falls until the evening, especially since it started snowing. Stan didn’t want to risk speeding on icy roads with Lola in the car.

His mind kept circling back to what Ferg had said. The question of why Stan had taken Lola from the hospital plagued him to this day. Was it guilt? He certainly didn’t think he’d make a good caretaker. If he had left her there, she probably would have been matched with a family that loved her. She would have friends and family, not just Stan. They could almost certainly give Lola a better life.

But somehow, Stan knew that, if he had the chance to do it over, he would’ve chosen to take Lola. She was the best thing in his life, and he loved watching her grow. It was selfish, really. He was keeping her from a better life with an actual family, because being around Lola made him less lonely. At least he knew that Lola would choose him too.

That just made Stan feel more guilty, like he had tricked this child into thinking he was someone worth trusting. He saw the way she looked at him, when he would tell her stories and hold her as she drifted to sleep. He knew she saw him as a Father. He couldn’t help but feel like, one day, she would realise just how bad of a caretaker he was. 

She wasn’t even his. He kidnapped her. Because he was selfish. For all he knew, her biological father would’ve given her a better life.

A thought hit Stan like a truck. Biological father. Lola said Ford talked about her “real”  dad. But that didn’t make sense. Stan hadn’t told anyone that Lola wasn’t biologically his. The only ones who knew were himself and Lola. Caryn certainly had no idea.

Actually, there was no reason for Ford to know about Lola at all. Caryn told Stan that she rarely talked to Ford, and when she did, he would cut it short. She had complained to Stanley for HOURS about it. So how the hell did Ford know? If he’d just figured Stan had a kid by her answering the phone like Caryn did, he wouldn’t have mentioned her “real” parents…

Discomfort settled in Stan’s stomach. There was something deeply wrong, he could feel it. As the pines lining the road got taller, and the snow felt thicker, Stan felt he was getting himself into something much, much scarier than he first thought.

It was dark when they got into Gravity Falls. Lola was blabbering away to Lizard, about ‘evil shapes’ and ‘secret codes’, probably from some cartoon. The radio played current hits, which just droned in his ears. His heart was racing as they approached Ford’s place. His hands ached from his tight grip on the steering wheel.

The house was oppressive. Covered in warning signs and barbed wire. It certainly wasn’t inviting. There were no lights on, just the barest flickers of candlelight through a stained glass window. It didn’t seem like the heating was on either, no smoke coming out from the chimney. Lola clung to his leg as they walked towards the front door.

“Stan, this is scary” Lola whispered.

“I know, kid.”

He knocked on the door. Silence. He knocked again, louder. Dread filled him. What if Ford had already-

The door burst open, and Stan was met with a crossbow pointed at his face. Lola screamed.

Ford looked demented, dishevelled, and covered in blood. He looked like he hadn’t slept in months, and his face was one of pure anger. Until, after a moment, he seemed to register who was at the door.

“Stanley?” Ford asked, dropping the crossbow. “What are you doing here?”

A dark look passed his face.

“Unless….”

Ford lifted the crossbow, pointing it at Stan again.

So, as I've stated in my last post, I've began to write my final draft for the first chapter of my AU's fanfic. However, I added a "(?)" because I figured, knowing myself, there would most likely be a couple of things I would remove to add in. And I was correct. There was a portion I initially liked, but realized seemed so random in the chapter, so I removed it. However, I didn't just want to delete it altogether, so I'm posting it here. Enjoy!

TRIGGER WARNING: Panic Attack

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Out-of-Context)

Cut Content From My Fic:

When he first entered the elevator, he was extremely confident and optimistic about how his first impression would be recieved. Now that his thoughts had been given some time to simmer from the long ride, he couldn't help his worries piling up at the front of his mind. What if he messed up? What if he said something wrong and offended everyone there and he had no genius to blanket his fall, since intellect wasn't vital the acting industry? Or, furthermore, what if it turns out he's not at all the good actor Stan assured him he was and made an utter fool out of himself? He could just picture the headline: "Dr. Ford — Brilliant Scientist Turned Actor Laughingstock."

Oh, Moses, what was he thinking! He had to leave this elevator this instant, one way or another.

His fingers resumed the activity of tapping the shiny, metallic railing attached to and surrounding the glossy walls of the elevator — this time at a much rapid pace than before. (He hadn't even realized he had stopped.)

Tappity-tappity-tap.

His brown eyes scanned through the assortment of buttons, searching for something that would allow him to pause or stop the electrical contraction. It didn't matter what it did as long as it would save him from future humiliation.

Tappity-tappity-tappity-tap!

He couldn't go through with this. Moses, for someone so smart he was so stupid. Why did he ever think this was a good idea?

TAPPITY-TAPPITY-TAPPITY-TAPPITY-TAP!

Why did he decide to go through with this? Why did he decide to go through this? Whydidhedecidetogothroughwiththis? WHYDIDHEDECIDETOGOTHROUGHWITHTHIS?

TAPPITY-TAPPITY-TAPPITY-TAPPITY-TAPPITY-TAPPITY-TAPPITY-TAPPITY—!

...

His entire body was frozen as still as a statue, yet it felt as if he was shaking and moving so much internally.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fun fact about me: For some reason, I have a tendency to write my protagonists having mental breakdowns in the first chapter of my fics (original and fanfiction alike). Usually, it doesn't feel random and fits in quite well, since those first chapters also tend to be very dramatic and impactful on my protagonist's emotional state. Here, it doesn't work. Stan has already assured him he'll do fine. Sure, he still can worry and be anxious about his reception to everyone (I know I would *cough cough* anxiety disorder *cough cough*), but it doesn't feel too in character for Ford, especially at the moment. So, I'm deleting the scene.

I don't want to reveal too much about my first chapter before it's officially finished and published, but I still want to share some of it. So, I screenshotted the part of it before the "Keep Reading" line — which is, admittedly, just the gist, but it's something.

I finally ended up starting to write my final(?) draft on Tumblr yesterday. FYI, I spent the time beforehand writing it on google docs and plotting out the chapter (and others to follow) in notes

So, I know that I already a poll on deciding my fanfic's name, but it feels cheap for me to name my fanfic based off of my AU and, at the time, I didn't have any more name ideas. Now I do. I'll still list "Actor Falls" as an option in case people enjoy it the most out of all of them.

I would greatly appreciate you taking the time to place a vote for my poll.

Time to start writing on my fanfic for my "Actor Falls" AU! Since, I'm terrible at titles, though, I would appreciate any feedback possible.

A Game of Pretend

Prologue

Ford was a fraud of a muse that wanted to use him to accomplish...whatever corrupt plans he had. Bill was aware of this from the start in an instinctual way he couldn't quite place his finger on. The routine felt familiar to him, as if it was something he was destined to experience, and yet so distant at the same time. Like he had only been left with a phantom whisp of a trace to go off and use in picking up the pieces. Off.

Not that he'd never met some scheming, manipulative puppeteer who attempted (emphasis on attempt; he was no easy target) to trick and exploit him before— No, Bill was well equipped with the type and how to handle them. It was just that this time felt... different.

...

He wasn't sure what to think about that.

...

So, he wouldn't.

Ford claimed to be a benevolent god bestowing wisdom upon those living their lives in ignorance. Clearing the fog that blinded their eyes and enlightening them with knowledge previously beyond their comprehension. A muse.

What he wouldn't say was that he was liar who was barely managing to hide his ulterior motives with every breath he took. Bill didn't care nearly enough to tell the guy, though. He'd let him have his fun as long the egomaniac got the memo that the painter wasn't interested in whatever con he was selling and left to go pester the next potential puppet. After all, he was a busy guy! He had perspectives to shatter with his breathtaking — totally original — art; stars to gaze at; etcetera, etcetera. You get the idea.

As he had previously stated (and was proud to declare), he knew how to deal with scumbags like these: Beings striving to play the long game to reel you in to a false sense of security where all they have to do to pull the strings is a simple lift of a finger, and — BAM! — they have someone, either entirely out of their will or out of pressure, capable of doing their bidding.

It never got to that part for Bill, though. He wasn't one to brag (he very much was so, depending on who he was talking to), but he had a natural talent for spotting out shapes — and more — like them. He stopped them before they even had the chance to play their games. He learned the best tip was to ignore them. It usually took a while, sure, since they were persistent to get their way, but as long as you were as well, they would give up.

So, that was what he had decided to do with the confusing higher being. Any attempts at conversation from his behalf would be met with utter silence from the Euclidean triangle, whom acted like he couldn't see him. That's how most of their interactions were...in the beginning.

Hey! A shape could only be so patient before something — or someone — got on their nerves! So, eventually, Bill snapped. He started yelling at the six-fingered person, cursing him out. This only seemed to amuse the supposedly 'superior' being, though, which got on the painter's nerves more. He acted oh so better and greater, all because he could float and do...er...other things Bill couldn't remember at the moment.

In the end, he caved in to the god's desires, deciding that his irritating efforts would diminish if the triangle played along ever the slightest bit.

They began to hold genuine conversations where they learned about one another. Ford began to seem less like some far-away, untouchable being who was created into existence just to annoy him, and more like an actual person with feelings and thoughts. Who knew! And — here's the real kicker — Bill was starting to like him.

Behind that arrogant, all-powerful persona was someone who listened to him, emphasizing, understanding. He truly was intelligent and shared ideas that the painter would have never considered on his own. They taught each other things, and instantly developed a kind of chemistry and dymanic that only that one person can create with you. He was funny, charming, charismatic...

...

But, still manipulative. Still trying to rope Bill into becoming some kind of puppet he could utilize for whatever plots he has in mind. He hadn't forgotten that, nor did Ford get any better at masking it.

He knew that he should cut him off, stop things now before they began to spiral into something worse he couldn't return from. But, he was hesitant to because Ford was the only other person capable of understanding him. Because Ford filled that gaping ache of missing companship. Because he was so starved for any other kind of connection he could have after a childhood of being alone, outcasted by his society for being different. Because Ford was the only other person who was just as much of a freak as him. Because Ford could not only tolerate his weirdness, but even like it. Because Ford was the only other person who knew what was like to see the stars...

...

He didn't want to lose that. Didn't want to lose his muse who showed him wonderful things he never dreamed of seeing before. Didn't want to lose his love.

And, besides, he was curious to find out what Ford's plans were and his curiosity was one that was rarely left unfulfilled.

So, for the first time ever, Bill would entertain this manipulator. Allow himself to go along with whatever ulterior motives he has planned. Engage himself in a game of pretend.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The "Euclydia Rises" AU was created by @orxinus . Thank you for reading! 💖

Next Chapter:

(Currently being worked on)

Gravity Falls Stangst Fanfiction Recommendation Master List

Here are some of my favorite Stangst stories that I’ve read, re-read, and collected over the past few years.  Some are old ‘classics’ while some are new or still updating. They’re listed in alphabetical order by title for easier searching.

The list will be updated periodically as I find great new stuff. Newly added stories are labeled with a ++

***Please read any tags/warnings before reading, as some of these stories may deal with upsetting topics and situations***

Short and sweet (under 10k words):

A better nightmare by eeveelotions A Better World by Metaphoricaltigers A Fortunate Stroke of Serendipity by heartfeltword a second twin by anonymous A Trip Down Memory Lane by Deanwinchestersgirl4 …And Count To Ten by impish_nature and you are paranoid in every paragraph by mackdizzy Bacardi by twinkinu Back in Time by mythomagicallydelicious Bad Habits by carbonatedblood Bad Thoughts by Cali_brate Barely Breathing by corvidcall (anathema15) blame me when there’s no one left to blame by anistarrose Bridges Burned by angellteeth Broken hearts, broken minds by Crazycatscarmen Broken Toys by logicalbookthief   Butterfly Effect: Branded by TheAngelofFate Casual affection by laudanum_and_wine Casual Observations by MotherOftheUniverse Change Comes All At Once by IrenkaFeralKitty Change of Heart by LogicalBookThief Choice by FriendlyCybird Dark by EvenAtMyDarkest Deadly Omens by IconicAnemone Death of Me by DarkwoodWolf Die Schatten Werden Länger by emjam Drift Away by Rymdunge Emergency Contact by madwriter223 Ever-newer Waters by dorbee Family Meeting by Windsett Fear of the Dark by Thesnadger feels like we only go backwards by WDW Finding the Right Frequency by impish_nature Five Bells by Spaceless_Sea Ford vs His Family by detectivejigsaw give me some time, I’m living in twilight by Base12 Hate Vs. Anger by MintGreenMare He Himself by asbelow He Let Go by mythomagically-delicious Heaviness of Heart by Leesbian Hello, Nightmares, My Old Friend by artsymeeshee He’s Not Dead by Koraesdoodles Hide and Seek by Crazycatscarmen Hold by MotherOftheUniverse I Imagine He’d Find it Violating by MotherOftheUniverse I Want to Come Home by Angelia Dark If it’s broke, don’t fix it by detectivejigsaw Illusion by anistarrose I’m So Sorry by Keleficent Imaginary Friend by Logicalbookthief Impulsive Acts by BuzzCat  Incandescence by pessimisticvirtuoso Intellectual Adequacy by paperjamBipper It deepens like a costal shelf by howevernot It’s Okay by Halogalopaghost (Lartovio) Just in Time by verysorrytobother Legacy by BethKerring Like Father Like (Adopted) Son by jacky-rubou ++ Limbo by emjam Long-Distance Call by LogicalBookThief Lost and Found by rubyflakes Lost on the Desert to Die by verysorrytobother Make Me Believe Again by fex_libris Maybe Spit Some Blood at the Camera (Just Say Alive) by Voidfish memory smackdown by untrustworthyglitch Mindscape and Memories by RandomNoodleDish molecules wrapped in silk by moroodors More Than Just the Spare by LogicalBookThief Necessity and Desire by mythomagicallydelicious Needing/Getting by GraboidFarmer Nightmare Town by Giroshane  No by Tired TM No Brother of Mine by brook456 No Need for Tending by Cutiebat Not To Be Blamed by ambigiousgelpens Nothing’s Even Wrong and it’s sequel by FriendlyCybird  Of Ending Summers and Endless Stars by EpitheicalPseudonym Oh Brother, My Brother by monkeyihihji On a Small Craft Somewhere Out in the Arctic by thesnadger Oneshots Collection by pessimisticvirtuoso Onyesha by ArtsyMeeShee / pessimisticvirtuoso Pet Humans by thesnadger Photographic Memory by impish_nature Pitt Cola on the Porch by Oh_Mellow Plans made and executed (Only to be foiled) by Crazycatscarmen Playing Pretend by Lizzy322 Pulling My Weight (In Gold) by Cyane putting the dog to sleep by parsnipit Quietus by optimisticvirtuoso Real Men (Don’t) Cry by Nicnac Regrets by AgentPrettyGuy Remorse by RadioactiveDeLorean Salt Water in my Veins by a_solitary_marshmallow Scourge by XxDecipheringGravityFallsxX Self-Starvation by detectivejigsaw Separation Anxiety by factuals-fanfics should’ve just held my tongue by howevernot ++ Shut Up by eeveelotions Siren Song by mythomagically-delicious Sixer by Keleficent Smile Like You Mean It by Logicalbookthief Somehow – Someday by Callipraxia Sooner or Later by twinkinu Spill It by pessimisticvirtuoso ‘Stanford’ Pines by impish_nature Starving Works by PorcelanaRota Stay With Me by Keleficent Stone Cold Crazy by Alverrann Suffocating by CrownedAnxietyAttack  Suffocating Part 1 & Suffocating Part 2 by saddle-up-dipper Ten Years by Runs_With_Wolves1 The Bouncer by sherlockfreak The broken pieces smile by Crazycatscarmen The Defective Twin by Elysianhyena The difference between holding and gripping by detectivejigsaw The Different Path by Bill_Cipher666 The Guttering Candlelight of a Tired Soul by 3HobbitsInATrenchcoat The past and the future by crazycatscarmen The Phoenix in the Birch Trees by anistarrose The Weird Old Man (who kinda looks like dad) by MotherOftheUniverse This Is What Dreams Are Made Of by fordanoia tie a noose around your mind by Word_Adict Tough Love by hattafan2593 Treading Water by phoenix (PrettyRedEyes) Two Sided by littleoptimistme Unless I Be Relieved By Prayer by thesnadger Untitled (sequel to Long Distance Call) by snapback-gravity-falls We Must Not Look at Goblin Men, We Must Not Buy Their Fruit and its continuation Growing Up Is Optional by logicalbookthief ++ Week Two – Travel by FriendlyCybird Wherever We Go… by IncomingAlbatross Wherever We Go by AlexTWDgr01 Who We Are, Who We Want To Be by BadonKaDank Wishful Thinking by Raven Darkwood year of atonement (busywork 1) by transmascdreamxd You’re Home Now by Keleficent You’re (Not) My Dad by MotherOftheUniverse Your Heart’s to Big For Your Body by MotherOftheUniverse

Epic Length (10k+ words):

Keep reading

A Fanfic Writer Appreciation Day rec-list

So, I heard people are celebrating fanfic authors today, and I wanted to take the time to share some of my all-time favorites! (all are Gravity Falls)

Blind Faith, by @pinesinthewoods

Behold, the fic that firmly dragged me into the Gravity Falls fandom! I remember scrolling through GF fics on Ao3 for the first time, and this was one of the very first I read. It’s dark, has heaps of glorious Stan twin angst, and still lingers in my mind to this day.

Towards the Sun, by @pinesinthewoods and @notthistimespock

Out of every single fic I’ve ever read, this one succeeds the most in getting inside the character’s heads. A bit of a canon divergence where, to save Stanley, Ford must confront his brother’s darker side within the mindscape. (Admission: I cried on multiple occasions while reading this.)

Flat Dreams, by PengyChan

I once told myself I’d never feel pity for a triangle. I was bitterly wrong. An amazing imagining of Bill’s childhood, early life, and rise to power… with lots of inspiration from Edwin A. Abbott’s Flatland. 

Stars and Trees, by jikanet_tanaka

A set of small scenes and vignettes of Stan’s life, from childhood to present. All of them are focused on the theme of family, and how Stanley relates to the idea over time. They’re very feels-y and sweet, and characterize Stan so well! 

The Wind in Visions, by @the-stan-twin and @the-ford-twin

Ah, where do I start with this? Probably the most pure examples of Fiddauthor and Mabifica I can think of. I adore the heaps and heaps of Pines family bonding in this and the slice-of-life feel it has… and yet there’s this feeling of something serious building in the horizon, and wow, I can’t wait to see what happens next with that!

Blue Bayou, by The_Lionheart (@icefeels)

The most fascinating take I’ve seen on Ford’s multiverse years. It features a very well developed OC, (honestly one of the best I’ve seen in this fandom), who becomes Ford’s traveling partner. Their interplay is equal parts hilarious and emotional at times, and is very deep without seeming forced. I really recommend this- it could use SO much more love! (It only has about 100 hits… and that needs to be changed ASAP! :D)

The Triboelectric Effect, by @aroford

An amazing what-if centering around the idea of Stan and Ford accidentally swapping bodies on the electron carpet, way back in ‘82…

Stanford Filbrick Pines

Palabras: 4,338

Extracto: Él era tan pequeño a su lado, podía caber en la palma de su bidimensional mano y pelar capa milimétrica por capa milimétrica para hacer lo que le diera la gana con la materia prima y los residuos. Goce previo en este momento repulsión por lo sentido.

Maldición escrita: Vi a alguien que pedía esto en Tiktok y lo hice. Descripciones de locura y más locura, comportamiento suicida, manipulación, paranoia, tipo de trauma religioso, representaciones explicitas de autolesión (pensamientos y acciones) y tal vez temas más delicados, ten esto en cuenta, MDNI. Esto es básicamente mi testamento en donde confieso que necesito terapia, me la pasé busque que busque sinónimos para esto. See ya darlings!

Translated version-English

Caminaba entre nieblas de un limbo penumbroso… si es que hace sentido dicha descripción tan vaga, ponía mi atención a cada paso que daba pero no lo sentía, casi como si de un sueño se tratase hasta que esta fue redireccionada, algo se escuchó a lo lejos y me pregunté qué podría ser. Cargaba consigo un aire siniestro, tintes perversos que goteaban de manera flemática, lo prohibido,la tentación, el pecado que tal como su pasaje sedujo a acercarme, así, poco a poco no sólo era un cántico insólito sino también un olor particular, una sensación que erizaba la piel pero como todo aquí estaba lejos de comprender. 

El tiempo se distorsionó y mi mente cayó en una espiral de la que ni siquiera sabía que había entrado hasta que al verme en un reflejo lúgubre una realización develó, era yo. 

Ese olor, ese sonido, todo… no era más que mi propio cuerpo, aquel recipiente vacío y a su vez putrefacto que anda sin rumbo a la espera de un final pero incluso si sucumbiera ante las garras de la mortalidad, sé que mi cadáver no sería más que veneno para esta tierra que ahora maldice mi existencia. Suplico misericordia aún si no soy merecedor y cómo hereje recibo cruel castigo que acecha en lo más profundo de mi ser, lo que desde un inicio me carcome, lo que me llevó a este estado. 

Un simple acto como el desliz de unas cortinas se sentía tan traicionero, le estaba dando la espalda y dejándolo a la deriva. Se lo merece, después de todo lo que hizo era absurdo que pensara que recibiría alguna defensa de su parte. Colocó el recordatorio de la herida recién hecha en la basura y trató de conciliar el sueño pero en ningún momento pestañeó, los minutos pasaban ignorantes a su situación y emociones tan abrumadoras que parecían burlarse sin decoro. Había encontrado una motivación que se esfumó a la misma velocidad con la que llegó, tenía que hallar otra meta, un propósito, algo que le diera lo que siempre ha añorado. 

Los días transcurrieron sin algo recalcable, una rutina ciega y cansada entre pasillos, salones y su dormitorio con el cambio irregular de ir a la biblioteca o las charlas con su compañero de cuarto, con quien compartía ciertas aficiones. Se trataba de convencer que lo disfrutaba que a pesar de ser un resultado no esperado podía sacarle provecho y demostrarse a sí mismo que los demás estaban equivocados, que él era mejor. 

Al tomar la decisión de vivir en Gravity Falls fue cómo si esa pequeña llama luchara por seguir incandescente y quisiera hacerse más grande. Podría tomarse como una huída de su hogar de cierta forma, kilómetros y kilómetros de distancia entre sus padres lo cuál no hace mucha diferencia de lo que era en Backupsmore. 

Todo era distinto, una nueva vida a la cuál no dejaría que nada ni nadie la estropeara. Y así fue por bastante tiempo, no había día o noche en la que no encontrara alguna cosa fascinante, una distracción y un alivio temporal a sus pensamientos que más le abatían pero luego, tal rosa, se empezó a marchitar y los pétalos cayeron. Dejando de nuevo un apetito voraz.

¿Y qué pasó cuándo la serpiente se le acercó? Cayó en el engaño. Tan desesperado por una pizca de reconocimiento, la aceptación… ¿Y qué persona podría resistirse ante un ser más grande que su propia existencia? Era todo un honor ser el predilecto de tan excelsa presencia, un ser poderoso que sí respondía a sus ruegos, a sus dudas, donde creía caminar en el mismo piso que este y no por debajo como por tantos años fue con los de su especie, por fin era un igual.

Un caída en picada hacia la veneración.

La noche era más pálida que la propia luna, sus emanaciones se trabucaban al pasar por los vitrales con motivos que con mi propia voluntad repartí por toda mi morada. Inmerso en mis inscripciones Bill merodeaba en el mismo espacio y cututeaba de cosas a las que no les prestaba suficiente cuidado ya acostumbrado a sus acciones. Al terminar mi último trazo coloqué la pluma a un lado y cerré el frasco de tinta para dejar reposar y por lo tanto secar el contenido de la página.

"Oye, Seis dedos" giré mi cabeza y lo primero con que se encontraron mis ojos fue con el triángulo reflejando mi apariencia, arqueé la ceja hasta que prosiguió "Apuesto que no esperabas encontrarte con alguien tan guapo, ¿Cierto?" río para volver a su color, chasqueó los dedos y me apuntó "¿Entendiste mi juego de palabras?", "Claro que lo entendí, es algo bastante simple para no hacerlo" ajusté mis lentes antes de cerrar mi diario , levantarme de la silla y caminar para dejarlo en el estante junto a los otros libros de mi colección.

"Te demeritas mucho, ¿No crees? Date un poco de crédito" giró sobre sí mientras avanzaba conmigo "Me doy crédito, sé cuando las cosas son fáciles, Bill" volteé mis ojos y salí del cuarto, en las escaleras estaba atrás de mi "Eso es porque eres muy inteligente y perceptivo, no cualquiera lo hubiera entendido la primera vez o la segunda" ante estás palabras sonreí pero no por mucho ya que el día me había agotado bastante para utilizar mis músculos. La cabaña tan solitaria como el día que se terminó de construir, por una parte era tranquilizador no tener que lidiar con esos ruidos resultado de hábitos molestos de otras personas pero por el otro lado se llegaba a sentir de más la soledad… por lo menos tenía a Bill a mi lado, aún si llegaba a desesperar pero muy rara vez. Tal vez debería realizar una estadística sobre eso.

"Es mejor así como estás si me lo preguntas" volví a escuchar su voz pero esta vez no le miré, bajaba escalón por escalón hasta por fin llegar a la planta baja "¿De qué hablas?" realmente no tenía idea, "Nadie te merece, Ford" aquella confesión me intrigó ahora en la cocina dónde no prendí el foco y sólo abrí uno de los cajones de la alacena por un vaso "En serio, digo, sólo mírate seis dedos; atractivo, inteligente, gracioso, organizado. Eres muy bueno para los demás" se puso en mi campo de visión y cruzó los brazos "Y dudo mucho que te conformarías con eso de todas formas".

Las circunstancias que llevaron a tan fatal encuentro…

Cerré mis labios y me quedé callado, sus palabras como gasolina para que pensamientos y especulaciones se anidaran en mi cabeza "Eso nunca lo sabremos, son acontecimientos contrafácticos y situaciones hipotéticas"tomé del vaso que previamente llené de agua "Además, suena como si fuera un narcis…", "Oye, oye, para tu carro amigo" Bill empujaba y jalaba sus brazos en el espacio entre él y yo "No lo digo con esas implicaciones, eres muy humilde Stanford" movió su cuerpo de tal manera que daba la impresión de sacudir la cabeza, alzó los brazos "Todo lo que estás haciendo beneficiará a la humanidad, para mi eso es no ser un egoísta, todo lo contrario" se acercó y colocó su codo en mi hombro derecho.

"A lo que me refiero es que estás mejor así" con la mano abierta del otro brazo me señaló moviendo de arriba a abajo está para enfatizar su punto "Eres más feliz de lo que pudiste ser de no haber sido así" yo seguía con los ojos puestos en él sin hablar "Te lo enseñaré" se alejó un poco para extender su brazo "Confías en mí, ¿Cierto?". Me era algo extraño que Bill solía preguntar acerca de mi confianza hacia él con la frecuencia en que lo hacía, pero siempre supuse que al ser alguien con sus poderes era normal, después de todo era lógico que al darme conocimiento y su amistad necesitara saber que yo no haría mal uso de su generosidad.

"Por supuesto que lo hago" tomé de su mano, su ojo se curvó "Siempre puedes confiar en mí, Sixer".

La cabaña se empezó a desmoronar y con brusquedad el entorno se modificó a una construcción impecable que no reconocía, al menos no al instante, las risas y platicas llenaron mis oídos mientras que mis ojos se aventuraban a acostumbrarse a los adentros, el sonido de unas puertas abiertas me hizo rolar ligeramente dónde vi algo que me estrujó el corazón, al frente de butacas y más butacas ahí estaba yo, caminando en el escenario con una toga, recibía mi título y era claro. Me estaba graduando de West Coast Institute of Technology.

Era algo irreal verme en esta situación, el ver como mi rostro reflejaba verdadero entusiasmo y felicidad al lograr uno de mis tantos sueños que tuve en la adolescencia. Mis padres estaban ahí, Stanley estaba ahí y su rostro era una mezcla de orgullo y alegría por mi; decepción, soledad y duda en esos pequeños detalles. Continuaba con una celebración familiar hasta que la escena cambiaba por segunda vez donde ahora trabajaba de inventor en una especie de empresa, sabía que el tiempo avanzaba gracias al calendario ficticio, lo que en un inicio llenaba de motivación al Stanford en frente de mí ahora le producía desdicha al ser limitado por su contrato, ya no tenía tiempo de sus propios proyectos o la familia con la que mantuvo contacto.

Y cambió todo de nuevo, me hallaba en Backupsmore y otra posibilidad se desenvolvió, conocía a alguien y desarrollabamos sentimientos el uno por el otro para luego, ¿Casarnos? Eso sería una pérdida de tiempo a mis investigaciones y más siendo que observaba como ambos nos establecemos en Gravity Falls para luego iniciar una pequeña familia, con similar resultado gradualmente caía en lo mismo: desdicha, pena, recelo ante la insatisfacción de la vida que llevaba. Me separaba de quien era mi cónyuge para intentar tener algo de serenidad pero nada, con constancia me veía a mi otro yo sumergido en los recuerdos y los tormentos de su decisión, de la intensidad de aquellas discusiones; sobre lo que se dijo o no.

Al voltear a otro lado mis ojos se abrieron al encontrarme frente a la misma persona, esta hablaba o más bien vociferaba, me había tomado un momento procesar aquel cambio para que sus palabras hicieran sentido. "¿¡Quién va a querer estar con alguien como tú, Stanford!?" su semblante fue como una cachetada que ardió incluso antes de posarse con agravio en mi cara pero no pude musitar tan impactado por el constante recibimiento de información "¡Eres un maldito egoísta!" me apuntaba con acusación mientras proseguía con su alegato. 

Cada sílaba sólo servía para afilar la estaca y al final cuando se clavó en mi corazón miré hacia abajo, al parecer nunca podría escapar de mí. De algo que yo nunca pedí. Entonces supe que mis adentros cuestionaban y mortificaban. El amor es un concepto tan complicado para una mente como yo, he presenciado finitas formas de demostrarlo y parece que no puedo entenderlo por completo, desde mi niñez hasta ahora, sigo pensando que no son más que frivolidades que todo el mundo pretende saber y manejar para luego juzgar a quienes intentan llegar a ella con simpleza.

En muchas ocasiones había sido testigo de sus demostraciones de mi padre hacía Stanley y mucho más consciente cuando eran para mí. Tantas veces escuché las expectativas, sus decepciones o simplemente sus pensamientos sobre nosotros y cada vez yo sentía la necesidad de aliviarlo pero sin dejar de lado a mi hermano, quería ser yo el que fuera lo suficientemente merecedor para que me dejara entrar en su vulnerabilidad y hacerle saber que tal como él me amaba yo lo amaba a él. Sus palabras hirientes… sí dolían, me hacían sentir insuficiente y tenían el mismo efecto en mi hermano pero… supongo que era su manera de demostrar que éramos importantes, que sabía que podíamos ser aún más amables.

Fue así como esta persona desvaneció y ventanas me rodearon para mostrar cientos de otras situaciones, no importaba cuán diferente fueran todas terminaban en desilusión "¿Ves a lo que me refiero?" Bill por fin decidió hacer su presencia de nuevo y con actitud irritada se mantuvo frente a mis ojos sin que las ventanas dejaran de girar a nuestro alrededor "Ellos no te apreciarían, seis dedos. Ellos son los egoístas, los fatuos que no podrían aguantar a alguien tan genuino com tú" con sus manos agrandó una de las ventanas que permanece inmovil para dejar ver la imagen "Incluso antes de mudarte aquí" apareció mi madre, luego mi padre, Stanley y otras personas con las que una vez crucé caminos "Ellos te hacen daño pero esperan que des todo por ellos sin chistar" suspiró "Y es por eso que esto es mejor para ti".

"Me tienes a tu lado, yo he visto lo que los otros no" ahora mudamos al espacio de siempre y me hizo sentar, una taza de té a la mano "Y me siento muy afortunado de que fueras tú quien me llamó y no un científico de pacotilla o algo por el estilo" volteó los ojos y yo solo reí, ajusté mis lentes con pequeño empuje de mi dedo índice y sorbí del líquido "Soy yo el afortunado, Clave. No es una ocurrencia diaria que un ser tan intrigante y sabio decida responder a tu llamado" pensé que la conversación iría a una más amena de inmediato pero Bill sólo me miró "Eres muy importante para mi, Sixer" yo no supe qué hacer o decir por la seriedad con la que lo decía "Te necesito… me encantaría poder estar en tu dimensión para pasar más tiempo contigo, ¿Sabes?" me erguí para poder por fin decir algo hasta que sus risas fueron lo siguiente "Quiero decir, a este punto eres como mi familia y eso es lo que todas esas cursilerías hacen" yo sonreí y asentí divertido a su elección de palabras "¿Tú también me necesitas como yo te necesito, seis dedos?".

"Yo te necesito, Bill".

Años después, parado en la proa con la vista en el extenso mar meditaba aprovechando que el otro Pines descansaba. Las ondas combinadas con sus reflejos inducían a un estado apacible pero persistía una oquedad distinta a las otras. El movimiento le recordaba a pensamientos y debates internos en su peor momento, donde se dejó arrastrar hasta la oscuridad y sufrir en ella.

Si se lanzaba era probable que encontrara el instinto de vivir, apenas si era visible debido a las estrellas que se veían a ellas mismas quietas, la madera bajo sus pies no crujía o parecía reconocerlo, un fantasma en pena que divaga en la gélida noche. Dio un paso más cerca del borde pero no se despojó de nada, el peso serviría. Pero con la mitad de sus pies suspendidos y la otra mitad todavía en el muelle se quedó así. ¿Cuánto tiempo pasó hasta que siquiera su corazón palpitó? Cuando recobró la conciencia se encontraba en su cama sin camiseta o alguna prenda para su torso, unas meras calcetas empapadas la única tela en su cuerpo que no fueran las cobijas que mantenían una temperatura aceptable.

A la mañana siguiente salió de la cabaña y caminó para adentrarse inconscientemente en el bosque, algunas criaturas que ya había estudiado se asomaban con timidez al ver la figura afligida del hombre, que actuaba con la naturaleza de un imán, llegó a una zona dónde los árboles contenían líneas peculiares que no dejaban de seguirle. Murmullos empezaron a saludar y decir insensateces, al tratar de ignorarlo cayó en cuenta del lugar en el que se paraba y se paralizó. Miles de ojos se clisaban en él sin parpadear, no contaban con un iris por lo que lo negro de la pupila lo hacía más tetrico y cómo si le leyeran los pensamientos, los mismos empezaron a manifestarse a lo largo de él hasta que no era más que un cumulo de estos órganos.

Había llegado a considerar sacarse los ojos, el simple hecho de recordar que contaba con esos orbes ocasionaban en su cuerpo las reacciones más desagradables, el rechazo inmediato a objeto parecido de manera metafórica o literal, en cualquier formato de información, al igual que la otra figura geométrica. Lo que antes era un paraíso en su vivienda ahora se comportaba como un infierno. Sus nudillos seguían en proceso de recuperación limitado pero su mente era un augurio incierto. 

O veía sus muñecas que con palidez denotaban algo que había llegado a odiar y pensaba, que tal vez, con la ayuda de algunos instrumentos podía llegar a quitar esas cuerdas de todo su cuerpo, no importa el tiempo o cuán doloroso si significaba que Bill no sería capaz de usarlo nunca más. Qué importaba, si ya era ajeno a cualquier humanidad. Y lo intentó. Su manía por las cosas punzocortantes no era acomedida, si había la posibilidad de estar, estaba, sino; lo hacía a la fuerza. Como aquella vez, una de las tantas veces.

Era un momento como el otro, deambulaba por el bosque, ahora el ardor se flameaba entre las distancias de una flora a otra, la aberrante calma. Su cuerpo se mecía gracias a que los pies hinchados trataban de no sentir su condición además de apulismarse hasta que ya no pudo más y se sentó contra un árbol, se retiró los lentes para frotarse los párpados ya con la impresión de no estar lúcido. Al entreabrirlos asestó que el árbol que se empinaba hasta los cielos ya no lo era, un bloque astillado en su lugar rodeado de otras espinas como repuesto. Se arrodilló antes de ponerse en sus pies y caminar hasta que las puntas de sus zapatos tocaban las raíces liosas y volvió a ponerse de rodillas, sus manos posaron en el filo de este círculo, ¿Cómo es que podía ver con tal detalle si es que seguía sin los lentes puestos?

No había cabida para esa pregunta porque se encorvó y trajo su cara cerca… más cerca…aún más cerca. Repelía por instinto su rostro pero la palabra está ahí, instinto. Alusión macabra cuando el fino tejido no aguantó por mucho y se derramó en la madera hasta que por su anatomía impedía la ruptura, se apartó con complicada moción ya que algunas trataban de seguir en él  y en una distancia ligeramente considerable. Vapuleó. Y el chasqueo no tardó. Paralizado rezumó con más corriente, las espinas se apropiaron de lo demás hasta engullir el último pedazo. 

Abrió los ojos con apuro y refugió su cabeza para comprobar que seguía todo junto para salir de ahí sin espera. Fue solo un sueño.

Pocas interacciones con otras personas empeoraban sus delirios, unos desconocidos mañosos, tontos, faltos de criterio, narcisistas, roñosos… estaba 100% de que apestaban a Clave. Pero no haría evidente aquel ‘conocimiento’, con las manos y codos en la mesa daba la espalda a comensales y trabajadores, sabía que le observaban con esa maldita sonrisa y esos ojos del demonio. Repugnancia al que le tocó el hombro, su izquierda aprisionó la muñeca externa pero lo que vio fue miedo en pupilas normales y un cortocircuito ocurrió dentro de su lógica, el semblante se rugó cuando la mujer empezó a carcajear.

Le consecuentó otra mujer a unas mesas delante, para que como infección todas las caras alargaran. Sin control la suya imitó, el sudor plasmaba el pavor que la experiencia le daba, su derecha enganchó la mitad del rostro. Sus nervios se habían trabado al igual que sus cuerdas vocales con la misma calidad sonora que un fonógrafo. En las ventanas, palmas se azotaban contra esta superficie, sus ojos se movían raudos y en dirección contraria al complemento de su par "Todavía tengo mis ojos sobre ti, Stanford" hablaron al unísono "¡Qué mal que tú no tendrás ninguno!" y unas de las extremidades que golpeaban las ventanas las traspasaron y se abalanzaron contra él, con específico énfasis en estos. Se agachó y jaló de la mujer para poder salir del establecimiento.

¿Fue buena idea haber envíado esa postal? Lo hacía un blanco más fácil, no sabía lo que el supuesto secuaz de Bill podía hacer con tal de dar con él pero si estaba debajo de sus órdenes era sentido común que este ya supiera de su localización. No había manera de saber qué tácticas sería capaz de usar. Incluso podría ya estar en su casa y él no lo sabría.

Él era tan pequeño a su lado, podía caber en la palma de su bidimensional mano y pelar capa milimétrica por capa milimétrica para hacer lo que le diera la gana con la materia prima y los residuos. Goce previo en este momento repulsión por lo sentido. Al girar la manija y que la puerta le diera permiso para entrar todo contenía su esencia, desde los tapetes hasta el dinero que cargaba consigo, casi con el pecho tocando uno de los tapices se arropó e inhaló la intoxicante fragancia, la prensó en sus costillas y empezó a frotar su rostro contra el tejido. Al subir la cabeza ahora se suspendía por sus brazos semi extendidos, miraba el techo y las lágrimas brotaban. Todavía lo necesitaba.

"¡Wow!" Bill giró su bastón mientras seguía viéndome en el espejo "Te queda de lujo, tigre" arqueé las cejas sin dejar de sonreír "¿En serio?"  giré mi cuerpo sin dejar de ver el espejo y ajusté el abrigo "¿Acaso me llamas mentiroso?" produjo sonidos de chasquido y ayudó en acomodar la prenda "Vamos, hombre… prácticamente eres la definición de romántico, Beethoven estaría celoso" esto me dio gracia y repuse mi postura ahora con los dedos ajustando el cuello, tenía que admitir que el traje era bastante refinado y tal como esperaba que un traje de época se sintiera. 

"¿Listo para irnos?" se inclinó y quitó el sombrero que reciproqué con otra inclinación, caminamos hasta llegar al lugar del evento dónde los intelectuales más destacados de todos los tiempos esperaban con cócteles en mano y charlando entre sí. Al entrar tomé una copa y me acerqué a platicar con un grupo pequeño con la compañía de Bill, incluso con la magnitud de la revelación no sentía nervios, es más, estaba seguro de mí y en el fondo no me importaba que opiniones me darían en cuanto la cortina se desprendiera.

Al dar la hora ambos nos pusimos al frente y dimos un discurso, sus chistes no faltaron. Al jalar la cortina y que el portal se pusiera a la vista oí exclamaciones, hubo un silencio hasta que todos empezaron a aplaudir y preguntar su mecanismo mi sonrisa era tan grande que Clave empujó su codo contra mi brazo y sólo nos sonreímos antes de dirigirnos a los demás para responder sus dudas.

Al despertar no esperé para ponerme de pie e ir a trabajar en el portal.

Recuerda cuando su paladar captó el corroído impropio y jaló su labio superior que mostraban su dentadura colorada en el espejo, pasó un dedo para limpiarlos pero no indagó más, convencido de que Bill, al usar su cuerpo se metió en una pelea y que esto era una mezcla de sus fluidos con los de otros. Fueron varias veces que se repitió y que decidió aceptar su explicación. ¿Qué tanto había hecho mientras usaba su cuerpo? Por amor a Dios, las fotografías lo mostraban pero era un pedazo de algo más grande, que cosas tan repulsivas debió de haber sido capaz ese ser.

Durante los 30 años fuera de su dimensión la sed de venganza nunca palideció, al contrario, se volvió más fuerte con cada día que sentía su sangre hervir a cada mención de su nombre. Vivía por eso, tenía qué… para ver el día en que Bill Clave dejara de ser una amenaza para la realidad.

Pero nunca esperó que su derrota se diera en las circunstancias en las que ocurrieron. El ver a su hermano cabizbajo y ahora vacío tal como él solo añadió a sus culpas y aflicciones, ante sus ojos Stanley siempre fue fuerte, decidido y confiado. El otro lado de la moneda.Los días en que toda la familia e incluso Soos o Wendy ayudaban a que Stan recuperara la memoria avanzaban y con eso trataba de recuperar su vida, que ahora sabía que Stanley no le arrebató sino Bill. 

Antes pensaba que debía dar todo para recibir lo mínimo, pero al regresar y obtener perdón… amor… Era difícil aceptarlo al principio pero la noche en que encontró fotografías viejas al igual que videos caseros de su niñez que entre los hermanos volvieron a recordar, algo cambió. 

"No puedo creer que en verdad hicieras eso" se puso la mano en el estómago y rió, Stanley solo cruzó las piernas y los brazos antes de extender los últimos con un intento fallido de parecer molesto ante el comentario "¡Es comedia pura! Un cerebrito como tú no entendería mi desarrollado sentido del humor" aterrizó un golpe en el hombro de su gemelo "Vuelve locas a las nenas", "Oh, no lo dudo, completamente locas" asintió con burla en su manera de hacerlo.

Stan volvió a darle un golpe "Bruto" Ford se sobó antes de devolver el golpe con mayor fuerza, para estar justos "Nerd". Luego de un rato el sueño empezó a llegarles, Ford puso su cabeza en el hombro de su mano mientras las suyas mantenían el tazón en su regazo y al borde de sucumbir a este escuchó "Te quiero, Ford" un largo segundo transcurrió hasta que las palabras salieron de su boca "Yo también te quiero, Stanley". 

La gente podía amarlo por quien era, no por cuan merecedor él podía hacerse de ese cariño.

Seguía con la mirada en el ancho mar recordando los detalles de toda su vida y con esa voz que le decía que aún seguía roto. "¡Ford, los niños nos están llamando!" Stan gritó al otro lado del Stan O’ War II "¡Ahí voy!" así hizo su camino no sin antes detenerse y voltear para volver a ver el mar, con una inhalación del salado aire susurró "No te necesito".

"¡Apúrate, Poindexter o sino te lanzaré por la borda!" el sonido de las gaviotas, empujó sus lentes más arriba y reanudó sus pasos "Hola niños, ¿Cómo están mis sobrinos favoritos?", "¡Tío Ford!"

(FILBRICK ERES UN PENDEJO, UN ESTÚPIDO IDIOTA, PITO FLÁCIDO, NADAQUEVERIENTO, FALTO DE CONEXIONES NEURONALES, MAMA HUEVO, CARCA DE MIERDA, INÚTIL, BUENO PARA NADA, CARA DE ANO, FIFE, FAN DEL TEMACH, OJALÁ TE HAYAS AHOGADO CON TU PROPIA MISERIA VIEJO TONTO)

Stanford Filbrick Pines

Words: 4,524

Summary: He was so small next to him, he could fit in the palm of his two-dimensional hand and peel millimeter layer by millimeter layer to do whatever he wanted with the raw materials and waste. Previous enjoyment, at this moment repulsion for what is felt.

Written Curse: What can I say, saw someone suggesting it on Tiktok and I did it, Descriptions of insanity and more insanity, suicidal behavior, manipulation, paranoia, kind of religious trauma, self-harm (thoughts and action) depictions, and maybe more sensitive topics, please be aware, MDNI. it's kind of different from what I'm used to write in some aspects but I enjoyed iy Seeeeeee yaaaaaa darlings!

Versión original-español

I walked through the mists of a gloomy limbo… If such a vague description makes sense, I paid attention to every step I took but I didn't feel it, almost as if it were a dream until my attention was redirected, something was heard in the distance and I wondered what it could be. It carried with it a sinister air, perverse dyes that dripped phlegmatically, the forbidden, the temptation, the sin that, as its passage, seduced me to approach, thus, little by little, it was not only an unusual song but also a particular smell, a sensation that made one's skin crawl but as everything here was far from comprehending.

Time was distorted and my mind fell into a spiral that I didn't even know I had entered until seeing in a dreary reflection a realization revealed, it was me.

That smell, that sound, everything… It was nothing more than my own body, that empty and rotten container that wanders aimlessly waiting for an end but even if I succumbed to the clutches of mortality, I know that my corpse would be nothing more than poison for this earth that now curses my existence. I beg for mercy even if I am not deserving and as a heretic I receive cruel punishment that lurks in the depths of my being, which from the beginning eats away at me, what led me to this state.

A simple act like the sliding of curtains felt so treacherous, he was turning his back on him and leaving him adrift. He deserves it, after all he did it was absurd that he thought he would receive any defense from him. He placed the reminder of the freshly made wound in the trash and tried to fall asleep but at no time did he blink, the minutes passed ignorantly to his situation and emotions so overwhelming that they seemed to mock without decorum. He had found a motivation that vanished at the same speed with which it arrived, he had to find another goal, a purpose, something that would give him what he had always longed for.

The days passed without anything remarkable, a blind and tired routine between corridors, living rooms and his bedroom with the irregular change of going to the library or chatting with his roommate, with whom he shared certain hobbies. He was about convincing that he enjoyed it, that despite being an unexpected result, he could take advantage of it and prove to himself that others were wrong, that he was better.

When he made the decision to live in Gravity Falls, it was as if that little flame struggled to remain incandescent and wanted to get bigger. It could be taken as an escape from home in a certain way, miles and miles away from his parents which doesn't make much difference from what it was in Backupsmore.

Everything was different, a new life that he would not let anything or anyone spoil. And so it was for quite some time, there was no day or night in which he did not find something fascinating, a distraction and a temporary relief to his thoughts that dejected him the most, but then, like a rose, it began to wither and the petals fell. Leaving a voracious appetite again.

And what happened when the snake approached him? He fell for the deception. So desperate for a shred of recognition, acceptance… And what person could resist a being greater than their own existence? It was an honor to be the favorite of such a sublime presence, a powerful being who did respond to his prayers, to his doubts, where he believed he was walking on the same floor as this one and not below as he was for so many years with his kind, he was finally an equal.

A nosedive into veneration.

The night was paler than the moon itself, its emanations were blunderbussed as they passed through the stained-glass windows with motifs that I distributed with my own free will throughout my cabin. Immersed in my inscriptions, Bill prowled in the same space and chatted about things that I didn't pay enough attention to since I was used to his actions. When I finished my last stroke I placed the pen aside and closed the bottle of ink to let it rest and therefore dry the contents of the page.

"Hey, Sixer" I turned my head and the first thing my eyes met was the triangle reflecting my appearance, I raised my eyebrow until he continued "Look, someone with science of humor" he laughed to return to his color, he snapped his fingers and pointed at me "Did you understand my pun?", "Of course I did, It's a simple enough thing not to" I adjusted my glasses before closing my journal, getting up from my chair and walking over to put it on the shelf next to the other books in my collection.

"You demean yourself a lot, don't you think? Give yourself some credit" he turned around as he moved forward with me, "I do credit myself but I know when things are easy, Bill" I rolled my eyes and left the room, on the stairs he was behind me "That's because you're very intelligent and perceptive, not everyone would have understood it the first time or the second" At these words I smiled but not for much since the day had exhausted me enough to use my muscles. The cabin was as lonely as the day it was finished, on one hand it was reassuring not to have to deal with those noises resulting from annoying habits of other people but on the other hand I couldn't help but feel more lonely… at least I had Bill by my side, even if I got desperate but very rarely. Maybe I should make a statistic about that.

"It's better as you are if you ask me," I heard his voice again but this time I didn't look at him, I went down step by step until I finally reached the floor. "What are you talking about?" I really had no idea, "Nobody deserves you, Ford" that confession intrigued me now in the kitchen where I didn't turn on the light bulb and only opened one of the drawers in the cupboard for a glass. "I mean, just look at you, six fingers; attractive, intelligent, funny, organized. You're out of their league, much better than all of them" he stood in my field of vision and crossed his arms, "And I doubt very much that you would settle for that anyway".

The circumstances that led to such a fatal encounter…

I closed my lips and remained silent, his words like gasoline for thoughts and speculations to nest in my head "We'll never know, they're counterfactual events and hypothetical situations" I drank from the glass I had previously filled with water "Besides, it makes me sound like a narciss-", "Hey, hey, stop your car, friend" Bill pushed and pulled his arms in the space between him and me "I don't say that with those implications, you're very humble Stanford" he moved his body in such a way that it gave the impression of shaking his head, he raised his arms "Everything you're doing will benefit humanity, for me that's not being selfish, quite the opposite" he approached and placed his elbow on my right shoulder.

"What I mean is that you're better off like this" with the open hand of the other arm he pointed at me, moving up and down, to emphasize his point. "You're happier than you could have been" I was still with my eyes on him without speaking "I'll show you" he moved away a little to extend his arm. "You trust me, right?". It was a bit strange to me that Bill used to ask about my trust in him as often as he did, but I always assumed that being someone with his powers was normal, after all it was logical that when he gave me knowledge and his friendship he needed to know that I would not misuse his generosity.

"Of course I do" I took his hand, his eye curled "You can always trust me, Sixer".

The cabin began to crumble and suddenly the environment changed to an impeccable construction that I did not recognize, at least not immediately, laughter and chatter filled my ears while my eyes ventured to get used to the interior, the sound of some open doors made me spin slightly where I saw something that squeezed my heart, in front of seats and more seats there I was, walking on the stage with a toga, I received my title and it was clear. I was graduating from West Coast Institute of Technology.

It was something unreal to see myself in this situation, to see how my face reflected true enthusiasm and happiness at achieving one of my many dreams that I had as a teenager. My parents were there, Stanley was there and his face was a mixture of pride and joy for me; disappointment, loneliness and doubt in those small details. It continued with a family celebration until the scene changed for the second time where I now worked as an inventor in a company of sorts, I knew that time moved forward thanks to the fictitious calendar, which at first filled the Stanford in front of me with motivation, now it filled him wit sadness. It caused him misery as he was limited by his contract, he no longer had time for his own projects or the family with whom he maintained contact.

And everything changed again, I was on Backupsmore and another possibility unfolded, I met someone and we developed feelings for each other and then, we get married? That would be a waste of my research time and even more so as I watched how we both settled in Gravity Falls and then started a small family, with similar results I gradually fell into the same thing: misfortune, sorrow, and suspicion due to the dissatisfaction with the life I was leading. I separated from my spouse to try to have some serenity but nothing, I constantly saw my other self immersed in the memories and torments of his decision, of the intensity of those discussions; about what was said or not said.

When I turned to the other side, my eyes widened when I found myself in front of the same person, they were talking or rather vociferating, it had taken me a moment to process that change so that their words made sense. "Who is going to want to be with someone like you, Stanford!?" Their face was like a slap that burned even before it landed aggrievedly on my face, but I couldn't mutter so shocked by the constant receipt of information "You're a damn selfish man!" they pointed accusation at me while they continued with their argument. Each syllable only served to sharpen the stake and in the end when it stuck in my heart I looked down, it seemed it could never escape me. Something I never asked for.

Then I knew that my insides were questioning and mortifying. Love is such a complicated concept for a mind like me, I have witnessed finite ways to demonstrate it and I can't seem to fully understand it, from my childhood until now, I still think that it is nothing more than frivolities that everyone pretends to know and handle. and then judge those who try to reach it with simplicity.

On many occasions I had witnessed my father's demonstrations towards Stanley and much more aware when they were for me. So many times I heard the expectations, his disappointments or simply his thoughts about us and each time I felt the need to relieve him but without leaving my brother aside, I wanted to be the one who was deserving enough to let me into his vulnerability and let him know that just as he loved me, I loved him. His words...they hurt , they made me feel insufficient and had the same effect on my brother but... I guess it was his way of showing that we were important, that he knew we could be even better.

That's how this person vanished and windows surrounded me to show hundreds of other situations, no matter how different they were, they all ended in disappointment "Do you see what I mean?" Bill finally decided to make his presence again and with an irritated attitude. He stayed in front of my eyes without the windows stopping rotating around us "They wouldn't appreciate you, six fingers. They are the selfish ones, the fatuous ones who couldn't stand someone as genuine as you" with his hands he enlarged one of the windows that remains motionless to show the image "Even before you moved here" my mother appears, then my father, Stanley and other people with whom I once crossed paths "They hurt you but expect you to give everything for them without complaining" he sighs "And that is why this is better for you".

"You have me by your side, I have seen what the others have not" now we moved to the usual space and he made me sit down, a cup of tea in hand "And I feel very lucky that it was you who called me and not a trashy scientist or something like that" he rolled his eye and I just laughed, I adjusted my glasses with a little push of my index finger and sipped the liquid "I'm the lucky one, Cipher. It is not an everyday occurrence that such an intriguing and wise being decides to respond to my call" I thought the conversation would go to a more pleasant one immediately but Bill just looked at me "You are very important to me, Sixer" I didn't know what to do or say, because of the seriousness with which he said it "I need you... I would love to be in your dimension to spend more time with you, you know?" I stood up to finally be able to say something until his laughter was the next thing "I mean, at this point you are like my family and that is what all those corny things do to someone" I smiled and nodded, amused at his choice of words "Do you also need me as much as I need you, six fingers?"

"I need you, Bill".

Years later, standing on the bow looking out over the vast sea, he meditated while the other Pines was resting. The waves combined with their reflections induced a peaceful state but a hollowness different from the others persisted. The movement reminded him of thoughts and internal debates at his worst, where he let himself be dragged into the darkness and suffer in it.

If he jumped, it was likely that he would find the sense to live, he was barely visible due to the stars that saw themselves still, the wood under his feet did not creak or seemed to recognize him, a ghost in pain that wanders in the icy night. He took a step closer to the edge but didn't take anything off, the weight would do. But with half his feet suspended and the other half still on the dock he stayed like that. How long did it take until his heart even beat? When he regained consciousness he was in his bed without a shirt or any clothing for his torso, mere soaked socks the only fabric on his body other than the blankets that maintained an acceptable temperature.

The next morning he left the cabin and walked unconsciously into the forest. Some creatures that he had already studied looked out timidly when they saw the afflicted figure of the man, who acted with the nature of a magnet. He arrived at an area where the trees contained peculiar lines that kept following him. Murmurs began to greet him and say nonsense. When he tried to ignore him, he realized where he was standing and froze. Thousands of eyes stared at him without blinking, they did not have an iris so the blackness of the pupil made him more gloomy and as if they were reading his thoughts, they began to manifest throughout him until he was no longer but a cluster of these organs.

He had come to consider removing his eyes, the simple fact of remembering that he had those orbs caused the most unpleasant reactions in his body, the immediate rejection of a similar object in a metaphorical or literal way, in any information format, just like the other geometric figure. What was once a paradise in their home now behaved like hell. His knuckles were still in limited recovery but his mind was an uncertain omen.

Or he would see his wrists that palely denoted something that he had come to hate and he would think that perhaps, with the help of some instruments he could manage to remove those ropes from his entire body, no matter how long or how painful it meant that Bill would not be able to use him never again. And he tried. What did it matter, if he was already alien to any humanity. His mania for sharp things was not discouraged, if there was the possibility of being there, it was, but; of not, did it by force. Like that time, one of the many times.

It was a moment like the other, he was wandering through the forest, now the ardor flamed between the distances from one flora to another, the aberrant calm. His body rocked because his swollen feet tried not to feel his condition, as well as making himself sick until he couldn't take it anymore and sat down against a tree. He removed his glasses to rub his eyelids with the impression of not being lucid. When he opened them, he realized that the tree in front that reached to the heavens was no longer a tree, a block splintered in its place surrounded by other thorns as a replacement. He knelt before standing on his feet and walking until the tips of his shoes touched the messy roots and he got back on his knees, his hands resting on the edge of this circle, how could he see in such detail without his glasses on?

There was no room for that question because he hunched over and brought his face closer…closer…even closer. His skin instinctively repelled his face but the word is there, instinct. Macabre allusion when the fine fabric did not hold for long and spilled on the wood until its anatomy prevented it from breaking, he moved away with complicated motion as some tried to continue in him, and at a slightly considerable distance. Whipping. And the snap didn't take long. Paralyzed it oozed with more current, the thorns appropriated the rest until they swallowed the last piece.

He hurriedly opened his eyes and sheltered his head to check that everything was still together to get out of there without waiting. It was just a dream.

Few interactions with other people made his delusions worse, strangers who were crafty, stupid, lacking in judgment, narcissistic, filthy... he was 100% sure that they reeked of Cipher. But he would not make that 'knowledge' evident, with his hands and elbows on the table he turned his back to the costumers and workers, he knew that they were watching him with that damned smile and those devilish eyes. Disgust to the one who touched his shoulder, his left imprisoned the outer wrist but what he saw was fear in normal pupils and a short circuit occurred within his logic, his face became grim when the woman began to laugh.

Another woman followed a few tables in front, so that like an infection all the faces would lengthen. Without control he imitated, the sweat reflected the terror that the experience gave him, his right hooked half of his face. His nerves had jammed as well as his vocal cords with the same sound quality as a phonograph. At the windows, palms slapped against this surface, their eyes moved quickly and in the opposite direction to the complement of their pair "I still have my eyes on ya, Stanford" they spoke in unison "Too bad you won't have any!" and some of the limbs that were hitting the windows passed through them and lunged at him, with specific emphasis on his eyes. He bent down and pulled the woman so he could leave the establishment.

Was it a good idea to have sent that postcard? It made him an easier target, he didn't know what Bill's supposed henchman could do to find him but if he was under his orders it was common sense that he already knew his location. There was no way to know what tactics he would be able to use. It could even already be at his house and he wouldn't know it.

He was so small next to him, he could fit in the palm of his two-dimensional hand and peel millimeter layer by millimeter layer to do whatever he wanted with the raw materials and waste. Previous enjoyment, at this moment repulsion for what is felt. When he turned the handle and the door gave him permission to enter, everything contained his essence, from the rugs to the money he carried with him. With his chest almost touching one of the tapestries, he wrapped himself up and inhaled the intoxicating fragrance, pressing it to his ribs. and began to rub his face against the fabric. As he raised his head, it was now suspended by his semi-extended arms, he looked at the ceiling and tears flowed. He still needed him.

"Wow" Bill spined his cane while he continued to see me in the mirror "It looks great on you, tiger" I arched my eyebrows without stopping smiling "Really?" I turned my body while taking my eyes off the mirror and adjusted my coat "Do you call me a liar?" he made clicking sounds and helped to adjust the garment "Come on, man…you're pretty much the definition of romantic, Beethoven would be jealous" this made me laugh and I restated my posture now with my fingers adjusting my neck, I had to admit that the costume was quite refined and just as I expected a period costume to feel.

"Ready to go?" he bowed and took off his hat that I reciprocated with another bow, we walked until we reached the place of the event where the most outstanding intellectuals of all time waited with cocktails in hand and chatting with each other. When I entered I had a drink and went to talk to a small group with Bill's company, even with the magnitude of the revelation I did not feel nervous, in fact, I was sure of myself and deep down I did not care what opinions they would give me as soon as the curtain came off.

When the time struck we both took the lead and gave a speech, his jokes were not lacking. When I pulled the curtain and the portal was in sight I heard exclamations, there was a silence until everyone began to applaud and ask its mechanism, my smile was so big that Cipher pushed his elbow against my arm and we only smiled before addressing the others to answer their questions.

When I woke up I didn't wait to stand up and go to work in the portal.

He remembers when his palate caught the improper corroded and pulled his upper lip that showed his red teeth in the mirror, he ran a finger to clean them but did not investigate further, convinced that Bill, by using his body got into a fight and that this was a mixture of his fluids with those of others. There were several times that it was repeated and that he decided to accept his explanation. How much had he done while using his body? For God's sake, the photographs showed him but he was a piece of something bigger, what repulsive things that being must have been capable of.

During the 30 years out of his dimension the thirst for revenge never paled, on the contrary, it grew stronger with each day that he felt his blood boil at every mention of his name. He lived for that, he had to… to see the day when Bill Cipher ceased to be a threat to reality.

But he never expected his defeat to happen in the circumstances in which they occurred. Seeing his brother with his head down and now empty as him, added to his guilt and afflictions, Stanley was always strong, determined and confident in his eyes. The other side of the coin.

The days went as the whole family and even Soos or Wendy helped Stan regain his memory and with that he tried to get his life back, which he now knew Stanley didn't take from him but Bill.

He used to think that he had to give everything to receive the minimum, but when he returned and got forgiveness… love… It was difficult to accept it at first but the night he found old photographs as well as home videos from his childhood that the brothers reminisced about, something changed.

"I can't believe you actually did that," he put his hand on his stomach and laughed, Stanley only crossed his legs and arms before extending his last ones with a failed attempt to look annoyed at the comment "It's pure comedy! A brainiac like you wouldn't understand my developed sense of humor" a blow landed on his twin's shoulder. "It drives ladies crazy" "Oh, I don't doubt it, completely crazy," he nodded mockingly in his way of doing it.

Stan hit him again "Idiot" Ford rubbed himself before returning the blow with greater force, to be fair "Nerd". After a while sleep began to come to them, Ford put his head on the shoulder of his hand while his held the bowl on his lap, and on the verge of succumbing to it he heard "I love you, Ford" a long second passed until the words came out of his mouth "I love you too, Stanley."

People could love him for who he was, not for how deserving he could get that affection.

He continued with his eyes on the wide sea remembering the details of his whole life and with that voice that told him that he was still broken. "Ford, the children are calling us!-- Stan shouted on the other side of the Stan O' War II, "Coming!" so he made his way, but not before stopping and turning to see the sea again, with an inhalation of the salty air he whispered, "I don't need you."

"Hurry up, Poindexter or else I'll throw you overboard" the sound of the seagulls, he pushed his glasses higher and resumed his steps. "Greetings children, how are my favorite kids of all dimensions?", "Uncle Ford!".

ADD is quite the mental illness to have, because you could simply get into gravity falls as a show. you could merely watch the episodes and have a favorite character.

or you could be consumed by it to the extent that you map out 24 years of ford’s portal adventures, arrange those 24 years into 74 planned-out chapters of a fanfic, and get to work.

A HUMAN CONDITION CHAPTER 29 RAAHHHH

Dropping these fanart of these guys ! I’m gonna have to work on Fiddlestan this weekend maybe, since I can’t draw Fidds at all 😭 gonna figure out how to draw him today 😕

BUT HERE IS BILLFORD and holy shit 😭 I love how Bill expression came out, Billy looking quite happy 🥹 it’s totally going to be my new pfp me thinks !!!

“No me mires con esos ojos”

“Me deslumbras, me derrumbas”

“No me mires con esos ojos”

“Te lo doy todo, ni modo”

“No me mires con esos ojos que”

“Me derrites, me trasmites”

“La vergüenza del sol, quien en su resplandor. Se ve opacado. A tu lado.”

I definitely recommend listening to Impacto for the candyland scene, geniuely so fitting they make me SCREAM 😭 Aside from that, I changed a little thing up about Billy 🥹 Those eyes are looking a little more cooler… Wish i could animate, it looked way cooler in my head LOL

Personally, I feel like if you let Bill play on the Sims, there’s two households and one Billy takes care of while Bill takes care of the other. One house is in flames and the anger and hate is being projected, the other is a normal home that totally isn’t mourning the home that died all those billion years ago chill 😦 totally… just a funny thought in mind 💀

P.S. I nearly forgot to go back my classroom after my break, I ended up showing up late because I wanted to finish rendering Ford 😭🙏 None of my coworkers were bothered tho !!!

@sapphosscribe fanart has been delivered 🙏 expect more 🥹🔥

I am writing guys trust, it just takes FOREVER 😭 Billford fanfics goes crazy. This is quite random but very much revelant to Everlasting Night and the future of it, but I’d like to think that Ivory and Irene are little bit something like

Ivy: I’m a geek 😕

Irene: I’m GEEKED

Sigh, can’t wait to reveal them 😭🙏 Although, I do get the feeling Ivory will likely have mix feelings in regards of her actions in the far future 💀 Definitely got both her parent's attributes 😭

Just sayin chat, the history book on the shelf is ALWAYS, repeating itself. Dare I say, I hate to be ANYONE 😭 But, that’s for the future, let’s focus on the good ending that is being worked on 🙏

“I need someone to remember me.”

HUMAN CONDITION POSTER FANART DROPPP RAAHHH 🔥🔥🔥

I WAS GOING THROUGH SM BUT HERE THEY ARE !!! Took so long hope you all like them though !!!

“I need something bigger then the sky.”

The Remenants of Bill

“Hold it in my arms know it’s mine.”

The Thriving Seed of Bill

“Just how many stars do I need to hang around me?”

This took me a while !!! And I can talk about the Bill vs Billy whole thing now 💀

Basically, how I read a Human Condition, it’s practically this whole dichotomy of Bill vs Billy and no one is aware of it. Believing Bill can change is an act of believing Billy is there, believing Bill can’t change means Billy is dead.

Billy is the root of Bill’s empathy and change, or what Bill would call, the root of his weakness. Bill considers Billy weak and deadweight, something worth forgetting. In the first lines, we ever read from Billy in A Human Condition is, “Just fit in”.

In the beginning of the Billy storyline, he himself in a major contradiction to Bill’s own beliefs and self-worth. Billy is what everyone hopes to achieve in the end, but Billy died the day Bill destroyed their dimension… right? Yes and no 🐺

The remnants live on and begin to crack through ways that Bill has taken notice of, especially when he’s with Mabel. It’s moments where he spends time with Mabel, I picture the hostile face shifting to a more softer and rounder face. Mabel brings out the best in him. Unknowingly the reason Billy returns. It isn’t just Mabel that brings the Billy side out. It could be objects of interest or of fear and even guilt. Objects of interest could be the silly straw or the spaghetti scene from the recent chapter. The fear and guilt of Billy is brought out by Ford when he chokes him out or when Bill wanders into the mind space Ford had locked up.

I have more to say about Billy, but man I gotta talk about Bill because I got so much to say about him.

Bill is a cheat, liar, and other say, a monster through and through. But Bill is simply a manifestation of survival and going against all of that he knew. The line in chapter 27, “Yes. I’m completely cured. My irregularity will not affect my ability to fit in, your excellence.” This is a lie that Bill said, this was an act of wanting to survive and protecting himself. This is also the point in the Billy storyline that Billy starts to identify himself with Bill and this is the same chapter where his mother and father starts to call him, Bill, as well.

This is the plantings seeds of Bill, that continue to thrive even after failing the very thing he was manifested for. He allowed not just himself but Billy to die. It’s only now they have another chance, but Bill believes he’s the sole reason why they had survived for so long before. Billy is weak and can only bring in danger. This pathetic, weak, piece of him is holding him back, and yet it is something worth protecting just to survive.

We see Bill truest form through lines like, “But Bill wasn’t weak. He was strong and he was smarter than all of them. They didn’t see it yet, but he could prove it! He only needed time. He wouldn’t be a burden, he would be a credit to all triangles, like his parents had said. He was different than other irregulars. He was better.”

But the next line is, “Because Bill was weak in the eyes of Euclydia. He was a freak, an irregular. He was made wrong. And yet. Bill wanted to live.”

Bill is a manifestation of wanting to survive and not letting anyone in. Even in this weak human form, that motivation drives home. He is protecting not himself but Billy as well.

I imagine if you were to enter Bill’s mind, it would be this split down the middle where Bill and Billy are seprated, but both of them have a piece of each other. Bill with a younger and triangle Billy, while good old human Billy is trapped with a more familiar triangle Bill.

Here’s pictures without the word 😼

“To finally get somewhere I can be all done.”

“Somewhere like Heaven.”

That’s how read Bill and Billy’s storyline and interpreted it. The drawings showcase them and in their own spaces. I like to think Bill is in the darkest part and only he and Billy illuminate the space. I gave him crazy long hair that would be everywhere since he is everywhere and because having long hair is great, but such a pain to try and maintain and take care of.

Billy looks the most like Bill’s human form, since he practically accepted this and the only artical of clothing he’s wearing is the sweater Mabel has gifted them. He’s in the brighter and hopeful side since he holds all the good parts. He’s just trapped with a piece of Bill, still trying to guard him.

Can’t wait to see what A Human Condition has in store and I’ll probably continus on with this theory/headcanon 😭 I actually have some headcanons about Bill and Billy, but idk if anyone wants to hear allat 💀

@sapphosscribe AGAIN, you’re such a talented writer! Got me thinking and all 😭 can’t wait to see what you have been cooking up 😼

I’m gonna have to rewrite an ending, I really didn’t like how it was coming out and it felt more fitting for the other ending !!!

Billford and their kids drives me nuts in a good way LOL 💀 I’m very open to answering questions or taking drawing request regarding the twins and what Billford are up to rn as we wait for at least one ending to come out 😼

God damn am i checking all my task off today 😭

Anyways !!! As I prepare the upcoming A Human Condition poster duology, I had to make face reference sheets for Bill because holy artwork, does these poster require some intricate choices, and oh my gosh, I gave him such a cunty face card 😭

Honestly, I can’t tell which face I like more 😭 I wanna lean more towards Billy because I swear I captured the look of hope so well, but then Bill is there and god damn do I love how threatening he looks (not sure if you can see the faint red in his iris LOL) Default is actually a little silly to me, I didn’t mean to give an arch brow, but now I can see this guy holding an arch brow as default 💀

Go check out A Human Condition genuinely such a amazingly written story 🙏

@sapphosscribe SEE YOU VERY SOON

A HUMAN CONDITION RAAAAAAAHHHHH 🔥🔥🔥

Once again, click images for HIGHER QUALITY WOOHOO !!!

The newest chapter of A Human Condition DESTROYED ME 😭 they made Bill so happy and before hand, I was planning on making another grand poster drawing fanart for it again !!! But I had to draw these scenes AHHH

I can’t wait to get started on the next poster promo drawing. I thought that the long hair Bill's drawing took years, but I know this upcoming one is going to take a LONG time. Worth it though! I already came up with the title names for the duology (ITS A DUO ONE OH GOSH) nicely called “The Thriving Seeds of Bill” and “The Remnants of Billy”.

Guys I will go into crazy depths of explaining the war between Bill and Billy in the upcoming fanart, but I’ll be pretty short here me thinks. Throughout the story, Bill is shown hostility, but there’s glaring moments where he drops his anger and danger, a more softer and easygoing side. It’s in the scene in the silly straw, where it was very much written that his face had lit up. I’m basically saying, even though Billy is lowkey dead, he lives on in these moments of his safety with Mabel or when he’s brought back to the memories of his younger self. We’re watching a man slowly return to a more whimsical moment before watching it die all over again.

I could say more, but I’m already yapping enough is 🥹 Plus this means I need to draw two face models for A Human Condition Bill show casing the softer and lighten up Billy side and then the hostile and sharp Bill side. I will post those as it’s own separate thing 🫡 (also, dw, Everlasting Night upcoming chapter is almost done 🙏 STAY STRONG EVERYONE)

@sapphosscribe KEEP UP THE AMAZING WRITING WOOHOOO

A HUMAN CONDITION FANART RAHHH

I FINALLY got my new iPad chat !! And just as I promise from my last artwork of Bill, I would make A Human Condition fanart !! And LORD the new chapter hit so HARDD !!! (Rip Bill, you would’ve loved Jinx) His crash-out was so AHH, I’m not ready to face more of his deteriorating mental state yet 😭😭

I hope I served the scene well !!! I added a couple of things that could be left up for interpretation !!! 🥹

Random tangent here, but I always imagine Bill looking like the most beautiful woman ever that you can never have or like a celebrity crashing out. Honestly, he’s lowkey serving here 🗿

@sapphosscribe hope you and your cat are doing okay !! Take care !!!

Made the newest chapter for my fic, Everlasting Night, and posted made artwork to accompany it !!! I feel like I could have done a lot better, not to mention I lowkey got that artblock 😭 But I think it came out looking decent 😼

I finished reading the newest A Human Condition chapter, chat don’t let Bill watch The Last Unicorn i genuinely think that would destroy him LOL 💀

Currently continuing the piece of fanart for said fanfic, barely starting base colors and then I’ll script a short comic and then sleep 😭 I actually never drawn backgrounds before, but when you’re dedicated you’re dedicated

what was the lie in the tags? -eyes-

That there would be a happy ending 🥲

I promise there will be one but erm… how do we feel about two endings chat…

Click image for high quality!

Can you believe guys? A Human Condition! Just a day away! A Human Condition in a day! Woo hoo! I am so happy about this information!

Of course! In celebration of a new year and A Human Condition coning back, you know I had to to work overtime and make fanart 🥹 Finally drew the gang and I love how these two came out! (kept my promise from last post 🐺)

@sapphosscribe

As always, click the image for better quality 😼

40 hours later and I finished making A Human Condition fanart again 😭 Honestly, the scene is a mix between when Bill finds himself in the secret space Ford had locked away in his mind and another chapter where he finds what Ford wrote about him !!! I even included some pieces of the text 🥹 I was not playing about the exagerated long hair, although the long hair here is what I visualize when he’s in the dreamscape and not what is actually described in the fic (you could say the whole design is actually 💀)

The whole thing is inspired by of course a scene from arcane that is once again Jinx 🙏 genuinely, I feel like Jinx and Bill are alike (they are my two favorite characters ever…) Also I wanted it to feel like a opening to a webtoon too 🥹 like O:TL

If this post gets FIVE likes, I’ll draw him with a reasonable long amount of hair in the iconic ‘I’m a little Different shirt’ I just love that fanfic sm tho, so I’ll prolly just do it anyways 💀 GO READ A HUMAN CONDITION GUYS PLEASE WE’RE ALMOST OUT OF HIATUS YEAHHH

@sapphosscribe