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Minachakotsuyu

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TODAY IS AKUTAGAWA RYUUNOSUKE'S BIRTHDAY!!! EVERYBODY WAKE THE HAIL UPP!!! TODAY IS AKU'S BIRTHDAY!!!! 🎊🎉🎆💞✨

LOOK AT HIM OMG, CUTIEEEE 💞✨🫶

Awhhh... He's CUTEEEE ❤️🫶‼️

went to their concert once, almost died, 10/10

TF2OBER DAY 3 - fairy pyro

more than this - p.js 18+

46 - jungwon I'm in your walls

more than this masterlist

send an ask to be in the taglist! 18+ accounts only

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Super duper quick Anais doodle to reacquaint myself with my at-home tablet; we’ve been parted for a whole week…!

Plus I have some Anais-related stuff to do; she’s totally my favourite Gumball character and that’s about to become pretty clear!

Oops, did I say too much?

caretaker of the earth

He can hack a really complicated system with a toothpick I'M TELLING YOU

I....i wanna pet him

Babs, Oracle, who sees everything

nightwing | red hood | batgirl | red robin | robin | spoiler | signal

gym crush

It's the first time in a long time that I do this, it's like learning to draw again.

Im giving it my all and thank you very much for your nice comments and love! You guys are very good to me 🌷

Un dibujo de mi wawa precioso Ren 🥹🩷🩷 Imagine como se vería recién despertado, abrazando un peluche de T/N / MC jshsjjs

Pооtis and Melimedеs

fluffy dalmatian skater girl 🛼

This is a cake inspired from a picture I saw in a book plus animal crossing so yeah I wanna make more cakes like this!!!

hualian in the witch hat atelier universe yay !

Do not separate.

Also there is this extra:

Some of the art I've made for @maymayandthehog.

Somethings Never Change, Feelings Never Fade 3/4

Author note: So after going back and forth with myself, I decided to make this a 4 parter just because things were getting a bit tedious and convoluted. So enjoy this next chapter! It's SFW, smut will be in part 4.

Word count: 6.1K

TW: blood, death, murder, swearing

Part 3: Somethings lost, somethings found

“You know out of all the habits you could have picked up from Cid… smoking?” Jill laughs patting my shoulder as we lounge about on the bench in Cid’s office waiting for Clive and Cid to return. Pulling the cigar from my lips, I stick my tongue out at her as she rolls her eyes. Another day of her scolding.

“Better smoking than being reckless? Or how about being sarcastic? I think this is the least harmful… I think.”

She throws her hands up in mock defeat laughing as I continue, “Maybe my bad habit would quell if you lot weren’t always throwing yourselves into danger at the drop of a whim.”

“It’s what we must do,” a gruff voice from the doorway states.

“Like fuck all.” I grumble while taking another puff of the cigar, much to the chagrin of Clive, while Cid chuckles from behind him. In a few quick strides he makes it across the room and promptly plucks the cigar from my lips and drops it to the ground, immediately stomping it out.

“You sound like Gav… and have we not spoken about this habit of yours?” He chastises as Jill folds her arms across her chest nodding in agreement.

“Maybe so but isn’t the real culprit Cid? I am his ward after all,” I casually throw out with a shrug of my shoulders.

Letting out a hearty laugh, Cid rounds his desk before tsk-ing at my admission, “Had I known you would be this quick to throw me to the wolves, our first meeting in Northreach may have been different.”

I roll my eyes before standing up to make my way to Cid’s desk as Jill and Clive gather around as well, “Speaking of Northreach… you all will be leaving soon, yeah?” Nodding with a deep sigh, Cid looks to me and sees the worry creeping into my eyes.

Cid was never one to hesitate or even feel regret for his actions but I could tell that there was some sense of unease “We’ve had this conversation before-”

“I know- but this is basically a suicide mission and you expect me to stay here?” I lament feeling my chest tighten, “If something were to happen and I can’t be there to help-”

“Kadenza. You will wait here with everyone.” Cid firmly states as he lights a cigar.

I feel my shoulders trembling and tears welling in my eyes. I was terrified knowing that the three people I cared about so dearly were essentially marching to their potential deathbeds. Of course they are fearsome warriors and dominants, nonetheless, but destroying a Mothercrsytal? This isn’t any ordinary foe. I knew for years that this is what Cid intended to do but a selfish part of me wished that he would let it go. The world has been so cruel to many of us so why should he save it?

Feeling a firm hand on my shoulder, I notice Clive standing to the left of me and Jill on my right. Everyone’s eyes were on me.

Placing my hand atop Clives, I look back to Cid, “My heart is filled with unease. I know you are all more than capable but-”

“We will come back to you,” Jill reassures while turning me to face her and clasp my hands in hers, “Metia has guided us to each other once and she will do so once more. Please wait here safely.”

I nod weakly, unable to look her in the eyes for fear that I may cry, “I’ve grown up yet I still feel like that little girl hiding in that crate. I wish there was more I could do besides stay here. It would settle my heart knowing that I could be with you.”

Jill pulls me into a tight hug and pats my hair reassuringly, “I am so sorry for leaving you that night but I promise, I will return this time. We all will, so please be patient and believe in us.”

There's a familiar pressure on my shoulder as it is squeezed gently. Pulling away from the warmth of Jill’s hug, I glanced back to see Clive with a comforting smile on his face, “You were always one to wear your heart on your sleeves but put your heart at ease… We will return without fail.”

I return his smile before looking back to Cid, “I trust you, all of you. Don’t make me regret it..” Cid puts out his cigar then stands to his feet as he reaches over to ruffle my hair like he did when we first met.

Cid chuckles, “Of course, m’lady.”

-

“Kadenza!” Tarja yells from the entryway of the infirmary as a soldier attempts to plunge his blade into my chest. 

I nearly dodge and pull my dagger from my thigh holster and lodge it into his abdomen. The man lets out a blood curdling scream and kicks me to the floor by my chest. Wheezing in pain, I attempt to escape as he grabs my hair but he’s not fast enough in finishing the job. Faster than I can process, Tarja swiftly rushes the man and rips my dagger from his stomach. The action causes blood to splatter on my face as she goes in for the kill and slices his neck. Gurgling out a pained groan, the man drops to his knees and crashes to the floor. The horrific sight makes bile rise in the back of my throat and I lurch forward emptying the contents of my stomach. I’m on my knees, coughing and spluttering. Doing my hardest to steady my breaths, I feel myself nearly hyperventilating as I manically wipe at the blood on my face.

There’s s-so much…

“Kadenza! Get up!” She barked, yanking me to my feet by my upper arm, “We have to find Gav and get out of here!”

Still dizzy from the adrenaline rushing through me I can only nod and follow Tarja out of the infirmary but panic at the realization of my missing dagger.“Tarja! My dagger!” 

Trying to pull out of her grasp, she only tightens her grip before grabbing me by my shoulders,“We’ll get you another one! Let’s go!”

No. That’s all I have left of him.

“No! I can’t! Please… that's all I have left of him…” I plead.

Her furrowed brows slowly turn upward in concern. The stern gaze fades away, replaced with remorse, realizing what she implied. She releases a deep sigh before pushing me back to the infirmary, “Be swift. I’ll look out.”

I make my way back to the infirmary and am once again met with the horrific sight of the deceased soldier. Moving closer to the body I do my best to not retch at the sight. My dagger is lying about a foot away but is drenched in blood. Hesitantly I reach my hand out to retrieve the small blade and immediately feel chills run down my spine. The thick dark liquid was still warm to touch. I shutter and do my best to not vomit once more as I wipe the blade down and place it back in the holster around my thigh. Standing up on shaky legs, I stumble back a little, I take in the bloody scene in all its horror.

“Kadenza!” Tarja calls from the hallway. 

“C-Coming…” I slowly take a few steps back before turning my back. I haven’t seen this much carnage since…

No… Now's not the time.

Returning to Tarja, I gave her a swift nod and we’re off again down the hall. The closer we get to the stairs leading to the Great Hall, the louder the cries of terror grow. The tightness in my chest returns and once again anxiety is licking through my veins like fire as we make it to the top of the stairs and take in the sight before us. I could feel my blood run cold and my body felt as though a million pins were pushing into me.

“No… no no no no. Not again.” I whisper watching the residents of the Hideaway being slaughtered in cold blood. My heart is thrumming in my ears as I watch paralyzed in place. 

Fire. Blood. Screaming.

Before I realize, I’m on the ground shrieking… My senses are completely overwhelmed. My chest aching from how hard my heart was pounding. My fists bloody from slamming against the ground. All I could do in the moment was shriek in anguish, the whole of my body trembling violently.

The night that I spent so many years trying to move on from. The night that replayed in my head whether consciously or subconsciously. The night that lived in my dreams… a harsh reminder of how I ended up here. That night 13 years ago was happening again.

I can hardly process the person in front of me.

-

“Kadenza stand up!” Tarja calls as she roughly shakes the young woman in front of her.

“Kadenza please! We need to go!” Tarja calls but Kadenza remains unresponsive. Knowing that the situation was too dire to stay in one spot, Tarja once again heaves the woman up by her arm and wraps an arm around her waist before guiding her down the hall to where she had seen Gav run off to, “Come on Enza, please you have to work with me!” She begs as she lugs the woman along with her. Tarja knew better than anyone the torments of Enza’s past and prayed that one day she could heal from it.

Kadenza had a habit of falling into depressive episodes that Tarja became all too familiar with but she had never seen her in this state. Unresponsive and nearly petrified. It pangs Tarja’s heart yet she knows that regardless of her emotional and mental state, they needed to leave as soon as possible.

Finally happening upon Cid’s office Tarja calls out to Gav as she does her best to support the woman leaning on her, “Gav we’ve got to go!” She shouts, looking around making sure no one was coming.

Stumbling to Cid’s desk, Gav reaches down to grab a crystal that had fallen on the floor, “Not without this!” Tarja notices the blood on Gav’s face as he stumbles forward. Knowing that he was behind her, she gripped tighter on to Kadenza’s waist as they make their escape. Not too far ahead was Cole and a few other escapees making a run for it. Noticing Gav’s bloodied eye and him stumbling, Cole reaches to support Gav.

“Cole!” Tarja calls as she follows the others outside of the ruin, “What the hell is happening?”

Helping Gav along, Cole grunts, feeling the excretion wearing on his body, “It’s Kupka! These are his troops!”

“Shit! How did he find us?” She questions more to herself but nearly tumbles to the ground with Kadenza in tow as she feels the ground begins to quiver under a massive weight. A massive form erupts from behind the ruins and a paralyzing sound of a thunderous roar rips through the air.

Titan.

Large chunks of rock and debris rain down from the sky causing everyone to backpedal and find another way to escape unscathed. Holding on to Kadenza, Tarja is just as shocked as Gav as he pushes Cole away. They both stare in awe watching as Titan slams his fist down.

“Fuck me!” Gav bellows watching the Eikon beat down their only home, “Where the hell are you, Cid?” He calls out in desperation with Tarja right beside him, too shocked to even process his words.

“Where the hell are you?” He says once more in disbelief right as Tarja snaps back to her senses.

“Gav! Let’s go! We need to get away- please help me with Kadenza!” She pleads, feeling her grip slacken around the woman’s waist. Turning back to the two women, Gav finally realizes the glossed over look in Kadenza’s eyes. As much as he wanted to ask what happened, he knew now was not the time. They needed to get to safety. He reaches for the woman and scoops her into his arms as they all make a run for it.

—

5 years later

“Thank you Cole… You didn’t have to travel back with me. I could have made it on my own.”

“And evoke Martha’s wrath? I’d rather not.”

“Well… You’re not wrong but with all the soldiers wandering around, Martha definitely needs you more than I do.”

He shrugs his shoulders dismissively, “Well we’re already here so if I’m needed or not doesn’t matter right now.” I let out a little chuckle feeling him tense up as he pulled the reins on his chocobo,signaling it to stop. Letting out a squawk, the giant bird comes to a stop then proceeds to nestle down on the ground comfortably. With the chocobo at ease, Cole releases the reins while I remove my arms from his waist. He dismounts first before reaching back to help me down. 

“Good boy,” I coo, feeding the bird a handful of gysahl greens and gingerly petting the top of its head. The chocobo chirps as it nuzzles its head into my hand. “Obolus should be here soon.” I say offhandedly as Cole walks to the deck. Turning to face him, I see one of his hands raised above his eyes, shielding them from the sun as he looks off into the horizon.

“I will wait with you here until you board… Ah there he is!” Cole says, intently watching the boat lazily sail forward.

Placing a kiss on the chocobo’s bill, I feed it one more handful of greens before joining Cole on the deck, “Hmm.. taking his time today?” 

Letting out an amused chuckle, he looks to me shaking his head, “Don’t let the grumpy bastard hear you, he might just sail away.” I nearly choke as I try to hide my laughter as Obolus nears the dock. As usual, his hood is shrouding most of his face but I can still see the grimace etched on his face.

“Obolus! Why the face?” I call out once his boat approaches the dock. Ignoring me, he secures the boat to the dock before carefully stepping up to joining myself and Cole.

“Enjoy the ride back,” Cole whispers in my ear as Obolus shoots us a glare.

“I may be aging but my ear is as sharp as ever.” Obolus flatly says as Cole shrinks back with a nervous chuckle before waving bye and jogging off to his chocobo. “Now girl, are you going to stand there all day or shall we head back.”

A little chuckle leaves my lips as I make my way towards the boat, “It’s good to see you too, Obolus. Anything new since I’ve been away?” Carefully lowering myself into the boat, I take the seat that’s nearest to him and watch as he makes his way back into the boat, working to undock us. He reaches to pick up the large oar from the crutch and pushes off the bank underneath the dock and we’re sent sailing back in the direction he came, “Aye. I’m sure you’ve heard Midadol causing havoc at the Hideaway for a weeks before returning to Kanver… noisy little thing.”

“Yeah… Clive told me the last time he stopped by. Poor thing seemed burnt out from running all over Valisthea for whatever Mid was building.” I laugh, reaching over the edge to dip my hands in the cool water. “I also received a stolas nearly a week ago… he said he and Jill were headed to Twinside.”

Grunting in agreement, he lays the oar down and secures it to the crutch then reaches for the tiller, guiding us along the dark lake. Chewing on my lower lip, I look to Obolus anxiously, “Have they returned?” 

He nods as he looks out towards the open water, making sure to navigate us in the right direction “A day or so ago.”

Perking up at the news, I feel the tension in my shoulders dissipate. I smile to myself as I direct my attention towards the rolling water beneath us. I watch as small ripples form from where the bow of the boat gracefully cuts through the water. For a few months I had been at Martha’s side, helping to heal the residents after the last attack from the Imperials. The Black Shields wreaked havoc among the villagers, destroying shops, cutting down innocents who were doing their best to avoid their wrath. But it was mostly for naught. Many people died and while others were left injured. Without hesitation I volunteered to go stay with the village for a while in order to help the injured, luckily with no objection from Clive. I had been there for nearly a fortnight when Clive and Jill returned along with a face I hadn’t seen in years, Sir Wade. And with him came the Guardians of the Flame who stuck around to help us recover. And much to my surprise, Lord Byron, who had been funding the Guardians of the Flame, offered to help support us monetarily. 

“That’s good to hear…” I say softly, smiling fondly to myself.

The rest of the ride was made in silence, Obolus guiding across the dark body of water while I gazed ahead enjoying the cool breeze of the wind bouncing along the gentle tides. Although it was only a few months, I had missed the hustle and bustle of the Hideaway and I’m pretty sure Tarja had her hands full without me. I had been drowning on my own taking care of the villagers, so I could only imagine how it was going for her without me… not that she couldn’t manage on her own but the tasks were less cumbersome with a second set of hands.

After nearly an hour of sailing, the Hideaway becomes visible the closer we move through the desolate waters. The scenery, all too familiar with scattered parts of ruin and airship debris littering the area. 

Home.

Excitingly my leg bounces in anticipation the closer we get to the dock which leads to a mild scolding from Obolus. Something about the movement being aggravating and that I needed to settle down but I ignored it as I swiftly stood to my feet. Before even having the chance to dock the boat, I’m hauling myself over the edge of the boat up to the dock.

“Are ya attempting to injure yourself, girl?! Be more cautious!” Obolus admonishes much to my dismal as I run across the pier to make my way towards the lift. “What about my pay brat?”

Laughing giddily, I pull the lever to start the lift and wave to Obolus as it sets off, “Get it from Otto!” I can hear him swearing as the lift ascends but I really couldn’t be bothered, I was too excited to be back. Once the lift arrives at the boarding deck, I swiftly make haste to Clive’s chamber, hoping that I’d see him and Jill there. Weaving my way past all the residents, I’m greeted with various hellos and acknowledgements of my return.

“Clive!” I call making it to his chambers before swinging the doors open taking him by surprise as I crash into his broad chest.

“Ah Kadenza-” He grunts out and pulls me from his chest as I look up at him sheepishly.

“Sorry! I’m just too happy to be back, even more so that you all came back unscathed.” He chuckles and leads me back to his room where Jill waits with her arms open, “Jill!”

We both laugh as we embrace each other, “Made it back, yes. Unscathed? Not so much” She jests, pulling back from the hug, “It’s good to see you in high spirits.”

“Well, I did get to enjoy a good pint and a smoke every evening without being pestered,” I reply mischievously, getting a disapproving grunt from Clive, “ And- everyone’s doing much better in the village. We even managed to bring in more bearers to aid, so it was time well spent. How did everything go in Twinside? Did you destroy the Mothercrystal?”

Sharing a hesitant glance between each other, Clive and Jill look back to me, “Is there a problem?” I question, feeling uneasiness settle into the pit of my stomach. Jill looks to Clive expectantly and he nods as the two have a silent conversation with their eyes before returning their gaze to me.

“Kadenza…” Clive reaches for my shoulders and firmly squeezes them, “Joshua is here.”

I feel my mind go blank and my heart wrenches in my chest. I can’t tell if it’s from anxiety or excitement but I feel dizzy almost.

“Kadenza?” Jill questions wearily. 

Still frozen in place, my mind and heart work in tandem piecing together emotions that I had buried for years. When Clive had first told me that he believed Joshua was alive was right after their return from Drake’s Head. Cid was gone and the Hideaway destroyed. Hearing Clive speak about Joshua possibly being alive was too much and so I brushed him off and never spoke of it again, forcing myself to believe that his mind was conjuring up apparitions in his state of grief. But now as I stand here, finally receiving the confirmation I had longed for for so long I didn’t know how to digest such a blessing in this grim reality.

Clive drops a hand from my shoulder and the other moves to my cheek wiping away a single tear, “Kadenza, I-”

“Where… where is he?” I questioned, closing my eyes to focus on the wild thrumming of my heart. Without even looking, I know he was hesitating to tell me. Something was wrong. Opening my eyes, I stare into the depths of Clive’s cerulean blue eyes, searching for an answer. “Clive…”

Feeling his resolve crumble he looks toward the door before mumbling ‘Infirmary’ under his breath but still loud enough for me to catch it. Without a second thought, I’m barreling through the doors of his chambers down the stairs as I rush across the Hideaway. In my haste I dash past Otto, ignoring his greetings and hastily climb the stairs to the infirmary, nearly falling as I barely missed a step. Roughly shoving the door open, I can know that I’ve startled Tarja as her shoulders jolted in surprise from where she stood over a man in white.

“Kadenza! Have you gone mad?” She admonishes but I ignore her, focusing on the man in the bed behind her. 

She notices where my gaze trails off to, “Are you alright?” She whispers slowly coming towards me but again I ignore her. Brushing past her, I slowly make my way towards the man who lay unconscious. Carefully kneeling down beside the man, I reach for his hand clasping it gingerly between my own hands. I take in his features that were familiar yet so very different from the boy I knew in my past life. Features that were once camouflaged by plump cheeks and boyish features were now more defined. Defined jawline and nose, sharper brows hidden under a longer fringe of bangs, and full lips… Over the years, watching myself age, I had always wondered what kind of man Joshua would grow into. 

Would he be tall? Maybe have facial hair like the Archduke? Would he allow his hair to grow? 

Those kinds of thoughts would cross my mind at night as I fiddled with the age-old dagger he had gifted to me before drifting off to sleep… But now… as he lays here in front of me, none of that mattered. Holding his hand tightly I bring it to my lips, as I place a gentle kiss on his bruised knuckles, “Joshua… it really is you. My dearest friend… you’re here.” 

I hear shuffling behind me before a gentle hand is pulling me close. Still holding onto his hand I look up to Tarja, vision clouded in tears, “Tarja… my friend… my dearest friend is here.” I try to smile but my lips won’t stop trembling, “He’s alive.”

Kneeling down, Tarja pulls me to her chest as a violent shudder crawls up my spine and a loud hiccupped sob leaves my lips. Releasing Joshua’s hand I throw my arms around Tarja, allowing years worth of pain to finally pour from every fiber of my being. 

-

From the day I reunited with Joshua, Tarja allowed him to be moved to a private room in the barracks where I could take care of him and be around as much as possible without disturbing the other residents who came to the infirmary. The room was simple with a single bed pushed in a corner, a small chest at its side along with a random chair but at my request Gav and Clive brought up a table into the room, placing it close to the balcony, along with another a chair. I used that area to pestle more medicine and organize all my supplies to care for Joshua. When all was settled Tarja helped me bathe him and assisted me in redressing him in a fresh tunic and trousers provided by Hortense. No one really bothered me as I stayed by his side, even Tarja gave us space and worked in the infirmary alone taking care of Bahamut and the other residents.

Dousing a cloth in cool water placed atop the chest nearest to the bed I pull the cloth out then wring it until it’s dry before returning to his bedside, carefully sitting on the edge. Gently blotting at the sweat collecting on his forehead and chest, I feel a small pout forming on my lips. He had over exerted himself in his fight against Bahamut and his body was paying the price. The rosy skin that I remember from childhood was flushed and pale. His skin was hot to the touch and lips chapped, mostly from dehydration. He had been unconscious since the day I returned but every so often would stir awake mostly speaking in nonsensical ramblings, delirious from a fever. The moments wouldn’t last long before he was falling back into unconsciousness however; fortunately for me, I was able to enjoy these small moments listening to the low tenor of his voice slur in speech as he attempted to make sense of the stream of thoughts coursing through his mind. Today was no different.

“You… you seem familiar,” He rasps, doing his best to focus his gaze, “...like her…” I can’t help the small laugh that leaves my lips watching as he does his best to concentrate on my features but the fever makes him too delirious. He lets out a huff as he closes his eyes doing his best to fight the fog clouding his mind but based on the furrowing of his brows it’s a losing battle, “Why does my heart ache so?”

Reaching forward to brush his fringe from his forehead, I’m startled as I feel his hand grasp mine. It’s warm and clammy but the grip he has on my hand is firm… comforting. He guides my hand to his cheek as a lazy smile graces his lips as his eyebrows slowly relax, “my most precious…” He trails off falling into a light slumber, the smile never leaving his lips.

The hold on my hand slackens as it slowly falls to the side, resting by his head. I lean across him to lay his arm back by his side. I shake my head gently and do my best to bite back the smile that had my heart fluttering while readjusting his body to a more comfortable position. Slightly leaning back to settle myself beside him I can’t help but stop to admire the peaceful expression adorning his face.

“Am I… am I that precious to you?” I murmur as I bring my hand back to caress his cheek, gently soothing my thumb over the apple of his cheek. “Was there a version of me that lived on in your heart?” He shifts a little in his sleep, allowing his cheek to rest comfortably in my hand as he nuzzles closer.

Wistfully taking in his presence, I can’t help the deep sigh that leaves my lips, “You’re so close yet so far… return to me, Joshua. I can’t bear another moment without you.” Lowering myself to the bed, I do my best to lay comfortably along his side while moving my hand from his cheek to his heart. Curling up as close as I can, I listen to the rhythmic thrum of his heart and the steady sound of his breathing. With the little light left in the day peaking through the balcony of his room, I felt myself falling into a light sleep.

-

The steady thrum I fell asleep to seemed more erratic in my drowsy state as a firm warmth surrounded me. The source shudders with every inhale and exhale, and the soft sounds of weeping. Finally allowing my eyes to flutter open, they’re met with rosy sun kissed skin peeking out from white fabric. 

Still in a state of confusion and fogginess, I do my best to pull away to take in what the source of the commotion was but am firmly held in place,“...what?”

“My most precious…” 

A violent chill runs up my spine when I recognize the voice, “Joshua!?”

His gently weeping subsides as he pulls back from the embrace he had me in where one of his hands was on the nape of my neck and another arm wound tightly around my waist. He studies my face as fresh tears stream down his face, “It is you…” 

He pulls me in gently resting his chin on the crown of my head as another shuttered breath rips through him, “Countless nights, chasing the phantom of your existence…. Nevermore… you’re here.” 

“You… you never forgot about me?” I mutter against his chest, feeling the familiar pin pricks of emotions welling up again.

“Not for a single moment, my dearest friend. You were always my most precious.” He whispers into my hair. My heart feels as if it would escape my chest with how hard it knocked against my breast. With how close he held me I knew he could feel it, yet he never said anything as we remained frozen in that moment.

-

“You’ve grown tall. Handsome even.” I tease looking over my shoulder from where I’m standing at the table. 

“And without the aid of carrots, “ He muses from the bed with a smug smirk playing at the corner of his lips. His fever was down considerably but I could tell that fatigue still lingered in his bones as he rested his back against the wall behind his bed. Rolling my eyes, I can’t help but snort at the admission and return to my work to grind up herbs. He may look mature but I guess there were still qualities that hadn’t grown with him. 

“My lady?” He calls from his place on the bed.

I laugh again at the formality,“Still not a lady.”

Peeking over my shoulder I see him raise fist to his mouth coughing awkwardly, searching for another way to address me, “My Shield?” 

Shaking my head, I put down my mortar and pestle with a giggle. Facing him, I notice the amused grin gracing his features. Huffing out a sigh, sauntering up to the end bed before flopping down to stare up at the ceiling, “Unfortunately no… turns out that I’m not quite cut out for battle.” I muse thinking back to my dream of once being a Rosarian Shield, “...that resolve escaped me long ago.”

There’s a brief silence, as I feel the bed shift beside me. Looking to my left, Joshua is laid beside me facing the opposite direction as he stares up at the ceiling, “Our circumstances have been quite unfortunate.”

Sucking my teeth, I can’t help the grimace adorning my face,“Unfortunate is a bit too gentle of a word, no?” 

Joshua chuckles as he turns his head to the side to look at me. I mirror his action as we lay in silence reveling in each other’s presence. Two childhood friends torn apart by unforeseeable circumstances but miraculously brought together by divine intervention, as if the Founders had been listening in on my prayers all these years.

Breaking the silence first, Joshua moves closer to me, “You’ve become quite the healer… Truthfully, it suits you.”

Feeling heat creep up my neck, I quickly avert my gaze to the ceiling “You think so?” 

He releases a sigh but keeps his attention on me, “I’ve missed you.”

Swallowing the thick lump in my throat, I keep my eyes locked on the ceiling above me as I do my best not to crack under the piercing stare of his sapphire eyes, “And I you.”

“Your aversion to me says otherwise… what ales you?” His voice somber.

Closing my eyes thoughtfully, I inhale deeply and hold it in for a few moments before exhaling. My mind replaying moments of our childhood together. Whenever I felt alone, he was always there beside me. Even with the heavy burden of being the Phoenix and future Archduke of Rosaria, he always made space for me to be in his orbit. My trusted friend and confidant. I would never be of noble blood and would never have the ability to stand by his side… Even so, I knew I could find pride whether I stood firmly behind him as a maid or confidently in front as a shield, I was thankful for a place in his life… yet, after years of mourning him and the friendship we had I always came to the same conclusion. My heart only ached like this because I adored him. And for years my mind had been tormented over the fact that no matter how hard I tried to root out his presence from my heart, my love for him only seemed to blossom like wyvern tails. The  deep rooted pining in my chest only longed more for his presence.

“It is you that ails me.” I finally mutter shifting to lay on my side and face him head on. He winces at my words but allows me to continue, “Do you not realize that I’ve always adored you? When you look at me like that… It sets my heart ablaze.”

Once again silence fills the space between us as we observe each other, neither one of us moving. The air felt tense and the silence was deafening, as I searched his eyes for an answer. His unchanging expression was hard to read and that only fueled the humiliation that was simmering in the pit of my stomach. Still unwavering, he turns on his back to face the ceiling and I can’t help but feel dejected.

“I-I’m sorry-”

“May I tell you of a girl whom I loved?” I feel my heart still, the question like a dagger lodging itself deep into my chest. I didn’t know how to respond so I closed my eyes and listened.

“My father always looked on with pity when it came to her… ‘An unfortunate thing’ he would say. She had no recollection of her age, forgotten surname, and, unfortunately, was orphaned. My mother held much contempt for the girl…” He recalls somberly before continuing, “However, to me… she was my dearest, most treasured friend.”

Ba-thump Ba-thump

“A myriad of our days were spent holed up in the Duchy’s library receiving lessons after being scolded for arriving late.” A low rumble of a chuckle leaves his lips, “When free of responsibility, we would sneak away to play in the gardens. Always the same game. Princess and the knight, yet, somehow… I never had the chance to be the knight.”

Ba-thump Ba-thump

“She loved flowers… chrysanthemums mostly. She eagerly awaited them every year, albeit she’d never admit to it… So I would leave a few outside her chamber and wait for her to retrieve them.”

Ba-thump Ba-thump

“The last time I saw her… I’d given her a dagger. I even had her initials engraved. Foolishly, I convinced myself that it was only a gift between friends. But with the passage of time and maturing, I realized it was more that my younger self had not quite grasped. It was love. Pure unadulterated adoration in its truest sense.”

Eyes still closed, I feel a shift on the bed and the warmth of his presence closer than before as his breath fans against my lips. Yet again I’m chewing my lower lip out of nerves before peeking an eye open, only to be met with his deep gaze.

“Do you still love her?”

Closing the gap between us, he presses a tender kiss to my forehead as I sheepishly screw my eyes shut. “How could I not?” He murmurs against my skin.

THE TWST4 KOMA😭😭

"Go to bed" ruggies face while counting the madols look devious lmao

POOR JACK BUT ALSO THATS SO CUTE😭😭

Also i need to point out how GORGEOUS vil is in this comic this month like yasss queen

RUGGIE NO DONT EAT THEM

love how cute jack is

Also ruggie wrong lyrics

Evryone here is a freak,its not even shocking anymore

NEW REACTION IMAGE: ACQUIRED

Honestly tribbie is so damn cuteeeeee omg she's purely adorable. I want her so bad but I barely have likee 40 special pass for mydei and he's not guaranteed mind u bc I spent like 102 passes which i saved on Robin (i wanted her so bad) BUT ITS FINE IM ON GRIND RN MYDEI WILL BE HOME and I'll get my cutie tribbie on her next rerun for sure🙏 to think I wanna have anaxa and castorice so bad toooo😔😭 as an f2p