Character Analysis - Blog Posts

Enter character analysis with an open mind. You’ll be sure to find extraordinary details in the character you’re playing.

oh man i could go on about how the song "hurt" by nine inch nails is a song that perfectly represents bucky and to a lesser extent bucky and steve's relationship, but i won't,,

SIKE

the entire opening of the song just perfectly encapsulates how bucky would feel after he pulled steve from the potomac and spent 2 years on the run. we know that bucky was controlled not only by manipulation and the wipes but also with physical (and implied sexual) assault. we we see pierce slap him when he doesn't comply, which doesn't faze anybody, meaning it's completely normalised. rumlow also says this to sam:

"there are no prisoners with HYDRA. just orders. and orders only come through pain."

the clever trick in this line is that at surface level we think rumlow is referring to the fact that sam would never be kept prisoner, he would just be immediately killed. however it's clear upon inspection this line is a direct reference to the winter soldier: he's not seen as a prisoner as he follows HYDRA'S orders, and he complies through means such as pain (i.e torture to make him subservient). this makes the meaning of the line "the old familiar sting" to be that he finds familiarity (and possibility stability, which brings comfort to his changing world) in pain.

"i hurt myself today, to see if i still feel. i focus on the pain, the only thing that's real." it's very possible that whilst on the run, bucky was paranoid that this was all a dream and that he'd wake up back in hydra's biddings, therefore he used methods of self harm to make sure it was real, to ground himself. additionally, by condensing pain as the only real thing in his world, for a brief period of time whilst self harming he allows himself to effectively block or repress all of the thoughts haunting him.

"try to kill it all away, but i remember everything." this demonstrates bucky's memory slowly coming back without the wipes, shown through him writing in all of the those journals in civil war. he has memories of his assassinations, so he views himself as killing all his memories when he's having a nightmare or flashback, as that's literally what he's doing: murdering another memory of a person. but unfortunately, he can't stop himself from remembering, no matter how much he tries.

"what have i become?" bucky is haunted by all of the horrible things he's done and the fact that he has completely changed, he does not recognize himself, it has been 70 YEARS - he spent nearly 30 years as james buvhanan barnes and fucking 70 as the winter soldier, double that of his original life. if you go back to tfa and then watch tfatws, you realize just how much he's changed (and i'm saying this as somebody who thinks his trauma was toned down). he's just fundamentally not the same person.

"my sweetest friend, everyone i know, goes away in the end." god hate talking about endgame steve and he doesn't exist in my mind but this shows exactly how bucky would feel when steve left, his sweetest, dearest friend has gone. everyone who he knew is now dead, or has left. he also probably believes that it is his fault that steve left, as he wasn't good enough to make steve stay because he wasn't the "real" original bucky. he refuses to form emotional connections with other people because he believes he will destroy everything and everybody will leave him due to the horrors he's done, which is why he's so distant to sam at the beginning of tfatws and near completely isolated.

this one's interesting as you could interpret it completely as steve's thoughts towards bucky.

"full of broken thoughts, i cannot repair." steve knows that bucky has been traumatised severely and that steve cannot simply fix it all, he cannot fix all of the things that hydra put into bucky's head that go far beyond just the activation words. this can be seen as him saying this through a thick lense of guilt, he feels ashamed of the fact that he is not good enough to repair bucky's "broken" brain and that bucky is irreversibly changed by what has been done to him.

"beneath the stains of time, the feelings disappear." this one is very interesting as you can view this as steve believing that due to the simple passage of time of 70 years alone, bucky's feelings towards steve have been reduced to nothing as bucky no longer remembers steve, he's just a footnote in his life. (and he's wrong because steve was bucky's lifeline). steve sees time as a "stain" for bucky because bucky's whole existence during hydra was negative, as well as the fact that whilst steve was napping on ice, bucky was getting tortured which makes steve feel immensely guilty. (not looking at YOU, endgame steve!)

"you are someone else, i am still right here." this obviously portrays steve's outlook on how they have changed. bucky has been completely changed, he lived through those years, he was concious and suffered unspeakable damage, steve went into the ice and immediately woke up as the exact same man with the memories of 1940 fresh on his mind as being a day ago. for bucky, even with his memories back, 1940 may be foggy to him simply because it was so. fucking. long ago for him and he had so many other haunting memories afterwards. i also think this line is steve showing his unyielding, unrelenting stubbornness towards bucky: no matter what, no matter the absolute worst case scenario, steve is still there for bucky. he's still here for him despite the fact that bucky has changed.

i believe these final line of the song portray how bucky feels about his life: if he could start it all over again, he would do everything in his power to not become the winter soldier as he knows he lost so much of himself and was shattered into pieces. the idea of "starting again" could also imply if bucky was able to start from the very start of the winter soldier days, he would immediately find a way to kill himself so that he didn't lose himself, as he believes his death would've been better than the subsequent life he lived. we already know that bucky was suicidal and the only thing that kept him going in romania was steve - imagine how he felt when he was a captured pow in 1940's and was told captain america died. it's completely believable he tried to attempt suicide somewhere in the early days of his capture, and he wishes looking back that he had succeeded by "finding a way" in order to keep himself.

of course, much simpler, this could be bucky reminiscing on life BEFORE the war even, as he already started murdering people during the war and was experimented on at krausburg, both of which would've affected him deeply. bucky envisions a life where, from the very beginning, he didn't have to suffer through what ultimately lead to him falling off that train, a fantasy life where everything was okay forever.

Neytiri, Spider, Quaritch, and parental love

Spider just wants to be accepted and have a family that loves him. Unfortunately Neytiri merely tolerates him, and his actual father is a murderous RDA colonel.

Spider wants to be loved and accepted by Neytiri. The Sully’s are probably the few Na’vi who genuinely welcome Spider. He feels like he belongs with them, Na’vi. However, Neytiri tolerated him at best. After all, he’s from the sky people, helped Quaritch + recoms learn to be Na’vi, put her children in danger, and was the indirect cause of Neyetam’s death.

Then you have Quaritch. Quaritch desires to build a relationship with his son, actively listens to him, and saves Spider from the torture of General Ardmore. Hell, at the end of the movie, Quaritch ACCEPTS Spider as his son. Unfortunately Quaritch is also a colonel who led an invasion on the Tree of Souls, attempted to murder Jake, Neytiri, and Kiri, and threatened to hunt down the Sully’s and kill them. So yeah…

Spider is in this weird limbo, and I really can’t wait to see what happens next.

Yet another post about Leda

You know, its kind of funny, but I've been browsing ER fanfics and fancontent almost daily for a while now (pls help), and one thing I've noticed is that a lot of people just. do not want. to put Leda and the gang in their fanfics. The most out of all Miquella's followers I found was Ansbach with 68 fics on Ao3. Leda herself comes at second with 48 fics and the others just kind of fizzle out after that. By comparison, Messmer, another DLC character, already has 500 fics.

Now, I know that this in large part due to the Messmer horny. But still. There's been 1,372 fics released in the ER tag since the DLC released as of me writing this. That doesn't really explain it. A good explanation might be that souls fans like to dwell on the pre-canon lore era we don't get to see, but even then, I remain disappointed by the lack of Leda in those fics as well. I have read several Haligtree-or-adjacent-focused fics written post SotE and few of them feature Leda or the needle knights, which is honestly a shame because Miquella having his own order of knights (almost counterbalance to the cleanrots), is a very interesting idea, and I am starving for Leda interacting with literally any member of that cast, her whole deal is just so interesting. And its not like Miquella doesn't care about her and she's just a weird fanboy, he gave her a wholeass rune and shit.

"But OP," you might be asking, "why dont you just write your own fic then ?". And you see, that is an excellent point, but I am unfortunately a coward with no confidence in my writing skills. So instead, I decide to make this.

I hereby present :

My Leda facts/analysis/interpretation/theories collection !

I am making this mostly to gush about Leda to spark interest in her as a character and maybe give interested writers who have actual skill to use this to get some inspiration. By no means am I suggesting that this is a guide everyone should follow, this is mostly just my inane ramblings about a character i am obsessed with. Still, if it helps someone make something, that's a net positive in my book.

without further ado, let's get into it.

Part 1 : Miscellaneous Facts

Fact number 1 : Leda doesn't see grace (at least her character model implies so):

I don't remember where it was, but I remember seeing a post that had every SotE NPC's eye colour in it. And a cool thing about that was that only a few characters didn't have the grace of gold in their eyes. And I remember specifically getting to Leda, noble knight of Miquella, and finding out that her eyes do not have a single trace of gold in them. They are grey with a blood-red clouding.

And I just found that so interesting it made me make this post, because what does it mean ? How did she lose it ? Did she ever have it in the 1st place ? Some of you might be thinking it's because she follows Miquella and not the GO, but the funny part is that, again, most of the others have it !

Hornsent has it, Ansbach has it, Freyja has it, Ymir has it, Moore has it, even the fucking madding hand has it. So why doesnt Leda ? (this also goes for some of the other NPCs who don't have it but im not spinning them in my head like a microwave so too bad ig)

Fact number 2 : She definitely killed the other needle knights

Ok so I already talked about this somewhere but I don't remember where so let's just start over from the beginning. The description of the Retaliatory Crossed-Tree states there were once more Needle Knights but now there's only one left. Meanwhile, Leda's sword says it "still reeks with the stench of crusted blood that lingers from the cull of her knightly comrades". Love myself a good "can't wash away the blood" trope.

Anyways, I took those two facts together to mean that she killed the other Needle Knights and talked about it in that alleged prior conversation I mentioned, but someone else replied that her "knightly comrades" could very well mean Hornsent and Ansbach, whom she attempts to cull before you reach Enir-Ilim. And I wanted to disagree with that, but I didn't actually have any evidence except "it's funnier this way" so you know, fair's fair. Except ! No it isn't !

When you help kill Hornsent, she says this :

He never placed his full trust in me, even under the effect of Kindly Miquella's spell. He must've recognised something. The scent of the killer that slept within me. The stench of crusted blood.

Mind you, this is before killing Ansbach, and right after killing Hornsent. The crusted blood from the cull of her comrades cannot be theirs, meaning Leda did kill the other NKs.

Fact number 3 : She deadass just smells like blood the whole time we see her

As just stated, we have 2 items describing how Leda just smells like dried blood. This has endless comedic potential imo, hear me out :

You first meet this dignified, knightly woman in Mohgs arena. You don't notice anything wrong with her smell, because of course it smells like blood in here, have you seen the place ?

The next time you meet her is in Scadu Altus. You begin to think something does smell really bad here. It's still not her however, because the Hornsent and his canonically shitstained loincloth are standing like 10 meters away from you, likely overpowering the scent.

You only get to realize its her constantly smelling like blood after the charm is broken and Hornsent leaves, and that coincides perfectly with the reveal that she's just paranoid as fuck.

10/10 olfactive storytelling. I mostly just put this fact here in honor of that Bloodborne bosses ranked by smell post tbh, that shit lives rent-free in my brain.

Character analysis time ! This bit is more given to interpretation so feel free to disagree on this :

Shes really not that bloodthirsty you guys

Alright, so this one might be a bit surprising given we just went over the fact she smells like blood, but the popular interpretation of Leda doing this because she likes killing and shit is just dead wrong to me. I spoke about it before, but there are so many lines of dialogue that suggest otherwise. Hell, even the sword description says she tried her damnedest to get the blood to come off. Here are some of the most telling lines i found (from fextralife/the github with all the text from SotE) :

-Her describing herself as a "killer" in that line about hornsent and crusted blood earlier, she seems to be very blunt and honest about what she does, almost to a self-deprecating point.

-I know I shouldn't let myself... But I suppose it's only natural to feel the weight of one's deeds at times like these. There is plenty left to be done. And I will see to it. <- what else do i even add here

-I don't enjoy casting suspicion on anyone I've called a comrade. But it's a small sacrifice in the grand scheme of things. We must eradicate all doubt...

-None can deny Sir Ansbach was truly a great man. We can be proud, that we were the last opponents he ever faced.

-Sir Ansbach must have considered it an honourable end, being felled by your hand. After all, the good fellow held you in the highest regard. When we speak of it, we may speak with pride—that we were Sir Ansbach's final adversaries

Those lines seem to be alternate versions of the dialogue you get after helping her kill Ansbach. And oh my fucking goodness gracious, i fucking love the second one. Like ghhhhhh, the grief for a comrade and the guilt and the self-justification and the need to move forward and theres somehow even more blood on her sword that she can't ever wash off but she can't stop here, she has to keep doing this because its not about her for her, its not about her feelings or her guilt its all just for the greater purpose shes reaching towards arghhh its so good.

There's also a notable throughline of her shutting her emotions down more and more as she goes, whether its to better do her job or to follow in miquella's footsteps :

-Unruly emotions only lead to misfortune. All the more reason we need someone like Miquella the Kind.

-Man is a compassionate animal, for better or worse.

-So be it. If you insist upon facing Miquella the Kind, Then I will run you through, whoever you might be.

-A single betrayal, enough to turn the tides… Unfortunate, but I will leave you be, for now. 

-I expected things to end differently with you. What a pity

-I suppose it was Sir Ansbach who won you over. Fine. One more heart for my blade to skewer.

Side Note : Those three last ones also read like shes really salty about being betrayed, and that's really juicy because it feels like she trusted you. She trusted you a lot more than most of the others, so it really stings quite a bit to learn you were lying the entire time.

All in all, it really does feel like she has to shut herself down to be a better knight, a more efficient tool for Miquella to wield. It's also quite tragic because she seems to be a compassionate person at heart, she welcomes you into the club, she constantly tries to understand the reasonings for other people's actions, and she tries to find ways to let those she suspects off the hook :

-The hornsent, hmm. On one hand, he trusts Miquella the Kind to bring salvation to his people. With the enchantment lifted, his vengeful passions may once again ignite, but surely he'd be mindful of Kindly Miquella's promise... <- this reads like her trying to convince herself she doesn't have to kill him

It's also very interesting because despite that, she really doesn't seem to be much of a people person :

-But for this very reason, Thiollier is incapable of betrayal. St. Trina's love for Kind Miquella is boundless. She is, after all, his other half. Or perhaps her feelings go beyond even that. Even if she was left behind, I doubt her heart would waver. <- she's just deadass wrong about Thiollier and St Trina

-If you don't meet her before the charm breaks, she does a really awkward introduction and then immediately starts infodumping about her crippling paranoia and zealotry

-Ansbach straight up just tells you : So, you've taken Lady Leda's side. I'm glad she stands with an ally. She tends to overestimate the burden she might carry alone. This is straight up just "oh nice, you finally made a friend, im so glad for you". This implies that Ansbach didn't believe Leda really had anyone on her side before then, and she kinda doesn't tbh. No one is really here because of Leda in the final battle, Dane is here for Miquella, Freyja is here for Radahn, Moore is here to cope with existence, and Hornsent just has an (understandable) hate boner for everything Golden Order. She doesn't really have any friends.

(Also shoutout to Ansbach for being concerned about the people trying to kill him, he really is the goat fr. Also: I've utterly failed you both... No wait grandpa its not your fault im so sorry)

--the funniest moment in the DLC imo : I've come to a realisation... There's ample evidence... Without Kindly Miquella's influence... I'm quite mistrustful of others...

Ah yes of course, the trust issues. Where do I even start.

This woman has nothing but contempt for mankind as a species. She is, as stated earlier, compassionate and tries to be nice to people but she constantly assumes the worst of everyone as a reflex. Her trying to find a way not to kill Hornsent is only because she wholeheartedly believe he will be the worst version of himself as a baseline, and thus thinks of him as a threat who must be dealt with.

-I'm afraid Sir Ansbach will have to be next. He claims he hasn't the spirit to take up his sword again, But in his day, he was the feared commander of the Pureblood Knights, who cleaved open Miquella the Kind with his blood blade. But I doubt it'll be very long... Before he recalls, as I have, the cascading sheets of blood. <- no trust at all

-her dialogue about you "turning on her" also feel like she's resigned about it, like someone who came in expecting failure and was still disappointed, like why did i even try, i should really know better.

-That aside, man is by nature a creature of conquest. They were never saints. They just happened to be on the losing side of a war. <- the classic. What else needs to be said. These are the words of someone who takes war, violence and hatred as a given.

And that leads me to my next point. I think Leda has had a very violent life overall. Some of the shit she says sounds too specific to just be a generalisation:

-But vengeance changes a man.

-Unruly emotions only lead to misfortune.

-Before he recalls, as I have, the cascading sheets of blood.

-One more heart for my blade to skewer.  

-The scent of the killer that slept within me.

This all sounds like she's talking from experience, and there's also her skills as a knight : she has the highest hp pools of the gank squad and can 2-3 shot most players. I know gameplay =/=lore but Freyja respects the hell out of her: Lady Leda and honourable Ansbach are of a special breed.

It's a very interesting combination of an extremely skilled knight who is very good at killing, has presumably been living a very violent existence and who trusts no one but herself, but who also hates having to kill and feels really guilty about it, despite having to do it for the sake of her cause.

And I believe that is the crux of her purpose, and why she is going through so much to fulfill it at any cost:

Leda believes intelligent beings are inherently flawed , and can never be trusted to do anything but make each other suffer. Leda is tired of inflicting and receiving violence, and sees little purpose in seeing the good in others. Leda would have probably made a terrific Lord of Frenzied Flame with how little hope she has.

But instead, she found Miquella. Miquella, who dreams of an age of compassion and who is in a position to achieve it, Miquella, who was raised in an order built and maintained through violence and grew to abhor it. Miquella, who Leda probably sees herself in, who Leda trusts blindly and unconditionally, for whom Leda is ready to commit any atrocity, no matter how it makes her feel, because he is her lifeline. He is her very last hope, the only solution short of complete annihilation she can see for mankind to reach pace.

So what if that peace is forced, is all of this suffering truly worth what little free will we can exert onto our world ? Leda has seen what mankind does with its free will, and she is tired of it.

She doesn't care if she lives to see it, she doesn't care if she has to kill every last part of herself in order for the world to see peace. No one will miss her anyway, she's nothing but a blood-soaked murderer. It doesn't matter if she likes these people, friendship and trust aren't worth all this senseless violence.

So she'll keep killing and killing and culling, until her blade is dull with crusted blood and every last obstacle to Miquella's age of compassion is gone. That's what a Needle knight does, is it not ? Kindly Miquella fashioned us as his needles to quell all, to ward away all.

And if Miquella doesn't understand her, it doesn't matter. He's far too good to understand the sacrifices necessary. She'll do what he can't. The other needle knights did not understand this, they were too naive to do what has to be done, so they were a liability. Don't think about their betrayed looks of terror, don't think about the cloying stench of blood sticking to your footsteps, this is your burden, this is what you deserve. You already knew you couldn't trust anyone, why would this be different ?

If Miquella must cast away parts of his very being to have this world then so can you. So sever that part of yourself that says you should be nice, that you should trust those willing to help, it only makes things worse. It will all be worth it in the end.

Phew, i kind of went apeshit while writing that last part. I hadn't really planned all that honestly.

To conclude this essay, I'd like to point out a really fun parallel to draw here. In this analysis, I have described my interpretation of Leda as a very skilled self-loathing blood-soaked knight who is tired of their endless crusade and yet is endlessly pushed forward by their utter devotion to their god, their salvation made flesh, whom they will shield for the atrocities committed in their name by being the sole person to blame. If that doesnt remind you of Messmer, then i think ill just curl up into a ball and yell very loudly.

Thanks for reading till the end of this absolutely nightmarishly long ramble, let me know if you liked it ! And don't hesitate to send any Leda fics you find or write along the way !

I have a theory about Yellow Guy

In the 6th episode, Electricity, we see Yellow Guy go up those stairs, right? It’s even suggested he has been up there before - but hear me out. What if he and Lesley were always up there in the attic to begin with? Here’s my evidence: Yellow guy is shown to have undeniable intelligence when he is fitted with new batteries. His previous ones were old and “moldy”, so that suggested he never changed them. This also suggests that there was a time he had fresh batteries and this was not the first time he had acquired this ‘intelligent’ state. This could imply that as time went on, as the battery ran out, his intelligence started to deteriorate, and so did his memory. This also makes me believe that the “Big Boys Room” and the “Bigger Boys Room” were used to accommodate Yellow Guy’s mind. The higher the levels, the more ‘smarter’ they were, which makes me believe that as Yellow Guy grew ‘less smart’, he moved down each levels, going from Lesley, to the Bigger Boys Room, to the Big Boys room, and finally to the ground floor with the trio we all know and love. Adding onto that, did you notice that Yellow Guy was absent from these rooms? Red Guy and Duck was there, sure, but they seem to recognize Yellow Guy as a returning character. They even say he’s “Missing out” and he has to “Keep up”, which could suggest he had been away for a long time (due to his intelligence diminishing as prior mentioned). Lesley mentions that they are all replaceable, and that she “has plenty of backups”. But if that was the case, why is there multiple Red Guys and Ducks and only one Yellow Guy? This is here where we continue to theorize so buckle up. Lesley and Yellow Guy are obviously linked. With several evidence of Yellow Guy being Lesley’s son, David (Her saying “you’re not my real son”, Yellow Guy’s dream scene in the episode “Transport”, the photos Duck has in the episode “Family” etc. etc.) we can already see she has an attachment to him. There is also evidence that she is not the one in full control, with her felt like appearance and the fact that when we first see her, she states,

“Batteries can be replaced,

but some things stay the same.

No matter how we twist and turn,

we're still dancing in chains."

The first line is an obvious callback to Yellow Guy’s situation: unlike the other puppets of the trio, he requires batteries to function. Or at least, think freely for himself. Kind of like a toy. But he himself is not replaceable. That’s why the other levels do not have a Yellow Guy. So he “never changes”. But Lesley continues, using the inclusive pronoun, “we”, to suggest that he and Lesley are in the same position: Trapped as puppeteers for a greater being. Both of them had been in discomfort, fighting for independent control, suggested by the phrase “twist and turns” showing constant change of path, creating a sense of restlessness. But at the end of the day, both of them were still puppets “in chains”. When Yellow Guy leaves the ‘highest’ floor, it is shown that there are more stairs, which hints there being more ‘intelligent’ beings, possibly the puppeteers (aka the producers of the show and Roy as shown by ending credits). This could probably answer the question on why Lesley had the book (which has been widely believed to be their escape plan) that Yellow Guy had written in his own language and gives the show a lot more lore.

So my conclusion? Yellow Guy and Lesley used to conspire how to escape the puppet universe together in order to break free, but due to negligence on changing batteries, Yellow Guy was eventually used just as just a puppet for Lesley to replace her lost son and as a form of entertainment to preserve the memory of David, while Yellow Guy permanently loses his memories, succumbing to the inevitable fate of becoming a puppet more the wider audience.

This …. This is perfect I am so glad I was tagged in this .this is literally why I love this victor creed this is why I think he’s a a great character because he’s not just so giant animal that goes around destroying crap this man is broken . And Logan was his last life line of hope and ones that life line is gone well now he has nothing left to lose

🐺 Victor Creed in X-Men Origins: Wolverine: The Beast Who Refuses to Be Broken 🐺

Alright, y'all, it’s time to talk about one of the most complex, raw, and tragically misunderstood characters in the X-Men universe: Victor Creed, aka Sabretooth, in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. This man is not just the “bad guy” or the “savage brother.” He’s a walking, talking embodiment of what it means to embrace the animal within, to survive by any means necessary, and to reject the very idea of being human. Let's get into it because this man is more than claws and fangs—he's the manifestation of what happens when you choose to be a monster to protect yourself from the world. 🧵✨

1. Victor’s Mutation: The Best Thing That Ever Happened to Him

Victor’s feral mutation didn’t just emerge—it saved him. As a child, he grew up in an environment of violence, abuse, and fear, with his father Thomas Logan being the embodiment of that brutality. And when those claws and fangs finally emerged? It wasn’t just a mutation—it was freedom. It was power. For the first time in his life, Victor had the means to defend himself, to fight back, to be something other than a victim.

His mutation wasn’t just a gift—it was a lifeline. It became a part of his identity, a source of strength that allowed him to confront his abuser and say, “You don’t own me anymore.” Can you imagine how liberating that must have felt? For a boy who was always afraid to suddenly have the power to defend himself? It’s no wonder he embraced it so completely. It wasn’t just power; it was survival. It was proof that he could never be broken again.

Key Point: Victor’s claws and fangs were more than just weapons—they were his armor, his shield against a world that had always hurt him. They were the only thing standing between him and a life of endless pain.

2. “Become Like Me, Brother” – The Call to Embrace the Beast

Victor wants Logan to give in to the animal inside because, for him, it’s the only way to survive. He sees Logan struggling, fighting against his primal urges, trying so hard to be “good,” to be human. And to Victor, that’s weakness. Because the moment you start to care, the moment you try to be anything other than a beast, you make yourself vulnerable. And Victor? He never wants to feel vulnerable again.

To him, the animal is freedom. It’s power. It’s the ability to take what you want, to protect yourself, to never be at the mercy of anyone or anything. He genuinely believes that if Logan would just let go—if he’d stop fighting and give in to the rage, the hunger, the feral instinct—then he’d be unstoppable. They’d be unstoppable. Brothers in blood and in the wild, untamed by society’s rules.

But what Victor doesn’t understand is that Logan’s fight to remain human is exactly what makes him strong. It’s not about denying the beast; it’s about finding the balance. And that’s something Victor can never accept because, deep down, he’s terrified of what it means to be human.

Key Point: Victor’s desperation for Logan to join him isn’t just about wanting a partner in crime—it’s about validating his own choices. If Logan gives in, then Victor doesn’t have to face the fact that maybe, just maybe, he didn’t have to become a monster.

3. “Being a Man Means Being Vulnerable” – Victor’s Fear of Humanity

Victor’s biggest fear isn’t death or pain—it’s being human. Because being human means owning up to your actions, facing the consequences, and acknowledging the pain you’ve caused. It means caring about people, letting them in, and risking the possibility that they might hurt you. And that’s something Victor can’t handle.

He’s spent his entire life building this wall of savagery, violence, and primal instinct to protect himself from ever feeling weak, scared, or helpless again. In his mind, being a man means accepting that you’re not all-powerful, that you’re capable of making mistakes, of feeling pain, of being hurt. And Victor would rather die than let himself be that vulnerable again.

So he embraces the beast, the monster, because it’s easier to be something people fear than something people can hurt. And that’s why he’s so desperate to make Logan see things his way. He doesn’t want to be alone in his darkness. He doesn’t want to face the fact that he’s been running from himself for so long that he’s forgotten what it means to be anything other than a monster.

Key Point: Victor’s fear isn’t of being beaten—it’s of being seen. Of having to confront the scared, angry boy who still lives inside him, the one who learned to bare his fangs because it was the only way to survive.

4. The Tragedy of Victor Creed: The Man Who Chose the Monster

Victor Creed isn’t just a villain—he’s a tragic figure. He’s a man who believed that power was the only way to protect himself, that embracing the beast was the only way to be strong. And in doing so, he’s lost everything that made him human. He’s pushed away the one person who could truly understand him, all because he’s terrified of what it means to care, to feel, to be vulnerable.

He doesn’t hate Logan—he envies him. He envies the fact that Logan still tries to be good, still fights to be more than just his claws and fangs. And that’s why Victor pushes him, taunts him, tries to drag him down into the darkness. Because if Logan can hold onto his humanity, then what excuse does Victor have for letting go of his?

Key Point: Victor’s journey is the ultimate cautionary tale about what happens when you let fear, pain, and anger define you. He chose to be the monster because it was easier than facing the man in the mirror.

The Bottom Line: Victor Creed is the Animal Who Refused to Be Tamed

Victor isn’t just feral—he’s the embodiment of what happens when you stop fighting against the darkness inside you and let it consume you. He’s a reminder that sometimes, being a monster feels safer than being human. But at what cost? In rejecting his humanity, Victor has isolated himself, condemned himself to a life of loneliness, rage, and endless bloodshed.

And that’s the tragedy of Victor Creed. He’s not evil because he wants to be—he’s evil because it’s the only way he knows how to survive. And until he’s ready to face the fear and pain that turned him into a monster, he’ll never be anything more than the beast he so desperately clings to.

---

TL;DR: Victor Creed is the embodiment of what it means to embrace the darkness, to find power in being feral and untamed. He’s a man who chose to be a monster because it meant never being vulnerable again. And that’s why he pushes Logan to join him—because he’s terrified of being alone in the darkness he’s built around himself.

This is my favorite thing ever seeing people analyze X-Men origins Wolverine Victor Creed. Versus normal Victor Creed, and how we kinda all agree that he’s probably the most accurate Victor Creed, even though he’s not “accurate” he’s not just some giant man goes around killing stuff. He’s this broken child that is definitely a psychopath that has been beat in and abused and neglected only for his own parents and parents of Logan to coddle and appreciate more. He was never the favorite. He was the mistake versus Logan who was this miracle child that keeps getting sick, but it can never die, I analyze the relationship a lot and I’ve concluded that Victor has abandonment issue so when Logan finally decided he was going to leave absolutely just snapped because Logan is his only family and he left him for some chick that he met versus a relationship that has been growing for around 100 something years my math may be wrong, but whatever this Victor Creed is kind of the epitome of all the victor Creed. He may not look like this giant big cat thing at the moment, but you could definitely tell this man been through some crap not to mention his relationship with striker and why he never shut it down as fast as he probably would expecting to. Yeah we kind of see him be like OK give me the adamant like Logan but once again he shut down saying you’re too weak versus your golden baby brother who is all compassing still superior to you which honestly doesn’t help situation not to mention Stryker was very much mentally and possibly physically abusing Victor, but he didn’t really see anything wrong with it because of everything his parents put him through and we’re going based off of the comics, and based off of whatever the heck the movie was trying to imply this man is broken to the point that Logan is the only stability in his life, which was also his driving force of hatred left. He kind of just didn’t know what to do with himself anymore so he tried to chase after that driving force literally he stalked Logan a bunch he made his life a utter nightmare because in Victor‘s eyes, his life became a living nightmare before Logan was even born and then after he was born, it just became worse, but he was his only stability and when he finally decided he didn’t want to be around him anymore, he said well geez if I can’t have you, no one can this man is normal Victor yeah he’s kind of all over the place but you can see this man is genuinely just broke. He doesn’t know what to do with himself. He doesn’t really know what to do anything without Logan because that is for his little brother that he loves a lot, which is probably confusing to him because he also hates him more than him doing stuff with Kayla and stuff like I have this also headcanon that when Kayla was like you know I need to get my sister back he genuinely despises that woman with a burning hatred because not only that she play his brother but also he left him for her and she doesn’t even like him well she loves him but debate whether or not she actually loves him or if she was using him I don’t know but Victor very much hates that woman also in the games and the movie is a very different way of treating Logan. He’s this big silly guy that very much has mental problems and you can kind of tell it. He’s trying to cover it up with jokes and stuff but around everybody else he’s really serious scary cat man scar he’s the equivalent of scar if he was actually like a human being but also could probably kill you without hesitation. He doesn’t really need a plan, but this Victor is freaking smart like really smart to the point that he does play out crap and so when things doesn’t go to his plan, he starts freaking out a little bit cause he’s like oh my God wait wait no instance no I don’t know they talked about this before. There’s always some scenes that show him slowly slipping into the void that is Victor going slowly insane just killing people over and over again, which was probably cathartic for him because this is only time to actually get the pain out

Everytime Victor looks in the mirror he sees his father. The same grey eyes, the same lips, the same hair and even the same damn face shape. The man who beat him everyday, who drank and seduced women. The man he grew up to be. Violent, spiteful, absolutely repulsive. He felt like a failure. Like something less than human. So he became the animal. Because if people see him as that, why not give them want they want?

King’s Progress

           In all honesty, I feel like King is amongst Luz and Amity as having the most clear-cut, sense of progression and development amongst the cast in Season 1?

           Thinking back on Really Small Problems, I really love its portrayal of King here… And, well, ALL of the episodes centering on King, really! Some might say that it’s repetitive to keep having episodes where he makes a mistake and apologizes, and while I can see that… Personally, I’m not too bothered because said episodes are always entertaining, I always love King content, but also…

           There’s a very clear sense of progression amongst King’s mistakes, as the season goes along? If RSP were Episode 11, King would’ve likely chosen to spray Willow and Gus with ‘Obivioso’s potion and then reaped what he sowed afterwards. But he doesn’t, and King genuinely surprised me with how mature he was in that episode… He was still immature ultimately, but you could tell he was still approaching things in a much more mature fashion than in prior episodes. King actively chooses not to make Willow and Gus disappear, but he DOES still hold onto the potion… And while it was an accident for them to ‘disappear’, King nevertheless takes advantage of the situation now that it’s happened. It’s not entirely his fault, but he still could’ve made amends any time and fixed what happened- Again, even if it wasn’t totally his fault here.

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Unpopular King Opinion

           Unpopular opinion I’m about to repeat AGAIN; But King actually has a lot more depth and nuance than people give him credit for, and he has that depth regardless of whether or not he was an actual king of demons or has some mysterious, all-powerful backstory or whatnot. If we look at him just as-is, at face-value, with what we actually have in canon, no speculation; King IS a very interesting character, actually, with a surprising amount of darkness!

           There’s the parallels with Lilith that I’ve brought up in the past. King is a very artistic individual who wants glory and recognition, but on his own terms; He wants to be appreciated for stuff he cares about and feels he has agency in, not because he’s superficially adorable or anything! But at the same time, King DOES want to be coddled and cared for, given a sort of childhood he never really got- But he just wants some respect and agency with that as well, is that too much to ask for?

           And that fits with how Luz babies him, but in a way that respects and listens to King’s requests, taking heed of his advice and lessons; Eda treats them both with respect and a proper level of accountability, while also protecting them because they’re both kids who don’t deserve that. This contrasts with Amity who’s kind of forced to grow up and is superficially taken seriously, but on the downside, she’s severely emotionally stunted and feels like she has to do all of the heavy-lifting for herself and others, by herself.

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understanding catra in taking control s5: ep 6

(lots of awesome people have already said some amazing things about this, but it’s been on my mind a lot especially since i’ve been seeing some anti catra bullshit lately)

first off, i want to say that i don’t think that catra is necessarily handling the situation well, but i often see people saying some crazy shit about how she’s so “ungrateful” to adora for rescuing her or whatever and just generally being incredibly insensitive to her.

you have to remember everything that catra has gone through up until the point. horde prime had just completely violated her body and mind, electrocuting her in the baptismal pool, cutting off her hair, and infiltrating her memories. catra, who is already deeply afraid of the losing control (namely to shadow weaver, who taught her that power and control were necessary to be safe from her abuse), just lost all of her autonomy in the most fucking disturbing, pseudo-religious way possible.

before this, catra fully expected to die. i’ve seen a lot of different takes and i’m relatively open-minded to about what it is that catra thinks specifically when she remembers that scene with her and adora’s younger selves in corridors, but i think that it’s something along these lines:

“all i’ve ever done is hurt adora, and all she ever tried to do was love me instead. i’ve loved her and wanted her more than anyone else, and still all i did was hurt her. adora finally gave up on me, like i deserved all along anyway. but maybe, just maybe, the last thing i do could be for her. maybe that last little piece of goodness in me could live on in her.”

hence the:

“all i do is hurt people. there’s no one left in the entire universe who cares about me.”

anyway, my point is that catra has been through fucking hell :(

adora rescues her, and in the moment, catra is (obviously) relieved, shocked, surprised, confused, even. (“why did you come back? we both know i don’t matter.”)

the confusion is the main thing i want to focus on. catra really truly believes that adora hates her (shadow weaver has conditioned her to believe that she has always been inherently worthless and unlovable), so catra can’t understand why adora would ever come back for her.

catra eventually comes to the conclusion that adora just wanted to feel like a hero. she just came back to rescue catra to prove her virtue or her moral superiority to catra.

so she lashes out. she feels so completely out of control, and bitter with adora for her actions, convinced that there is no way that adora came back for her out of love.

adora handles this like shit. the literal first thing she does is throw the mattress onto the floor, and later slams catra into the wall. adora lashes back at catra, hurt that catra doesn’t “appreciate” adora’s love for her. adora doesn’t even try for two fucking seconds to understand where catra is coming from.

(adora does have a consistent issue with only seeming to be able to empathize with catra’s emotions when catra is weak, vulnerable, and powerless throughout much of series honestly)

ugh and calling her a stubborn brat? like i love you adora, but that makes my blood fucking boil. it is SUCH condescending, shadow weaver-coded language to use toward catra. i understand, catra is being “difficult” or whatever, but god it’s so easy to see why catra is acting the way she is.

and ofc catra is scared of entrapta! obviously, catra wronged entrapta deeply, and catra has never lived in a world with grace and forgiveness. shadow weaver physically abused her all her life, and hordak suffocated her for losing shadow weaver and lying to him about it. catra knows that she hurt entrapta, so naturally she immediately assumes that entrapta is going to fucking kill her the minute she has a chance.

then adora’s reaction is to fucking shove her into the wall and tell her to “grow up”. catra just looks fucking terrified, backed into the corner in her little horde pjs :(

adora backs off for a moment and tells catra that she would respect her wish to drop her off somewhere, catra realizes that adora really could leave her, and immediately rushes to beg adora to stay, kneeling on the ground, reaching up for her hand. something about that whole scene just absolutely fucking breaks my heart.

it kills something in me when i hear people say that catra didn’t do enough for redemption. it’s never what her redemption was ever about. catra is genuinely so, so much more complicated than that. and so is adora! i’m still sad that adora never really made up to catra for some of her shitty behavior.

i don’t believe that their arcs are meant to be done at the end of the show. there’s still so much room for them to grow. and that is what the post canon fics are for lol

oops this ended up being wayyy more of a rant than i intended; i think about catradora all the time :)

Ok I talked abt this a lil before in another post but THE RUTHARI DESIGN LANGUAGE

Ethari outwardly has changed, but that design reflects more of his grief, the passage of time, and his inability to let go of his husband. It’s also all external—his hair is longer, his Moonshadow markings are now asymmetric/unbalanced, his earrings are gay as hell and really show how he is not over his marriage at all. Most importantly, his armor/shoulder things. He looks prickly, closed off, and that’s exactly how he acts when he thinks runaan is a stranger, which is very un-Ethari.

On the other end, Runaan’s design is hugely the same as season one, with the only two changes being A) his weird ass cutout sleeve is missing on his right, and B) his horn. Unlike Ethari, runaan’s biggest character design change is losing a part of his actual body. Hair can grow, clothes can change, but Runaan’s horn is part of him. His being has been fundamentally altered in a small way, and he’s going to carry that change for ever. Both figuratively, with how he’s seen the true outcome of his assassin work, and literally.

Ethari has a design that communicates his relationship with runaan, he always has. In bloodmoon huntress, runaan calls Ethari his guiding light, but in reality I think it’s the other way around. Because Ethari is the most out of character without runaan. He ghosts Rayla out of grief, which is very out of character, because runaan is gone. But after two years, runaan still comes home to an Ethari who is grieving and hopeless, but not broken.

And after they reunite, Ethari returns to the same state we’ve seen him in for pretty much the entire show. And I get why. He’s a minor character, the plot doesn’t need him to have a paradigm shift like runaan, but I like to read into it as Ethari being the moonfam anchor. He’s the home they all come back to, he’s the warm hug they all need, he’s soft and he’s kind and he’s defined by his love for them. So when he loses his family, he loses himself. He’s and anchor with no ship. Runaan is his heart, without runaan, there is no point for there to be an Ethari, and it makes him lash out and ghost Rayla.

So. Here’s why I’m thinking about all this: Ethari making Runaan a prosthetic horn. Ethari, runaan’s anchor, helping him reforge this part of himself and shine truth onto the great lie of assassin-hood that runaan held so close to his persona. Runaan choosing to replace his belief in precision violence with his belief in love. Most importantly to me, Ethari confronting the lie he helped reinforce for runaan. Ethari seeing that he’s been making weapons to fuel the cycle of violence that in turn took his entire family and his heart from him. And Ethari and runaan deciding to help build the new world, Everkynd, where the lie and the cycle don’t have to dictate their lives.

For the past while I have been trying to get my stepmom into anime

I showed her Zombieland saga and she loves it (Saki is her favorite character with Tae as a very close second I’ll discuss why in this very post) we just finished the last episode of Revenge last night

We find out about the movie and agree to see it in theaters if we can because our town doesn’t have one so we’d have to go to the next town over

We also started talking about Tae and I said “I wonder if in the movie Tae will get her awakening”

And my stepmom says “well I hope not” and of course I ask why and she then goes on this whole speech on how Tae isn’t normal and how she loves that about her

She talks about how she’s glad Tae gets to be a little abnormal a little feral and a little weird and strange she even went as far to say that if Tae did get awakened it’d ruin her character

This is how I know I’ve at least gotten her foot through the door for anime

Ok so I just watched the Horrid Henry episode about Prissy Polly’s wedding and like she seems to have a soft spot for Henry??? At least that’s how I interpreted it.

At the beginning of the episode we see Polly at least trying to bond with Henry. We see her trying to brush his hair (a common bonding between female cousins specifically. My older cousin who looks a lot like Polly actually would brush my hair all the time when she came over) although Henry didn’t like it cause she was being too rough. She was at least trying to bond.

And what does she do when Henry falls in that puddle just before the wedding? Does she yell at him and call him horrid like Henry’s parents? No. She does start to get upset, but she then calms herself down, leans down to Henry and kisses him on the forehead.

Have we EVER SEEN Henry’s mum give him that kinda affection? From the episodes I’ve watched, no. And she only got truly upset when Henry toppled the (probably very expensive) cake on her in her (also probably very expensive) wedding dress. Contrasts this with Paul who seemed like he was gonna beat Henry’s ass this episode. And we know this changes. He also grows a soft spot for Henry. Site the entire milkman episode.

say it out loud. I feel so bad, he is definitely the most underrated and misunderstood character, he had such potential, but he was mentally unstable and Kisaki didn't help either :(

"Izana doesn't care about anyone!" "Izana is so selfish!" "Izana is so evil!" "Izana is emotionless!" SINCE WHEN???

[SPOILERS]

The only thing he wanted was a family just like any kid in orphanage does. People seriously decided to call Izana selfish for wanting Shinichiro to be only his brother like hello?! He doesn't know how families work because he never had one. Literally any kid would wish for their brother figure or parental figure to give ONLY them attention but when Izana does that suddenly he's so selfish and heartless. Like uhh we're talking about a KID here. Despite having big brother which he should have spend time with alone, he still invited Kakucho to go with them. By creating Tenjiku, he wanted to give orphans a HOME. Where they'd feel like they belonged. But this IZANA is SELFISH?!

He did care about Emma. I understand if people are angry at Izana for agreeing with Emma's death but that doesn't mean he didn't feel guilty or didn't care?! He was manipulated by Kisaki and thought that it was right thing to do because of that. He felt guilty but he couldn't tell that. He does feel feelings, he just can't tell what he's feeling.

In anime, his LAST word was Emma. And when Izana hallucinated Emma and Shinichiro by Mikey's side, it's not because they really stood by Mikey's side. It was Izana's HALLUCINATION, hence he thought Emma and Shinichiro wouldn't stand by his side. And he hated that thought because that meant Mikey still wasn't alone like him but Izana was.

LOOK HOW HAPPY HE LOOKS AT THE THOUGHT OF HIS MOM VISITING HIM. Even if she abandoned him, even if she broke his heart and left him completely alone...He still cared about her.

Currently crying💕

Izana did care about people and loved them but he thought HE was unloved and uncared for. He couldn't even believe when Mikey told him that he wasn't alone because Izana still had Mikey.

Until his last breath, he thought he was being used by Big Four when they truly respected Izana and cared about him.

The way he looks and mother and son, wishing he had same relationship with his mother.

A comment from Cinema therapy’s video on ‘Loki’.

Transcript and extra notes below:

I...disagree with the idea of Loki being a narcissist.   

   Acting out the way he does isn't just a trait of narcissists but also of people with low self-esteem, (I should know, being someone who has acted in such a way myself in the past.) Loki was clearly constantly put down by others, disrespected by who he thought were his people, and generally considered 'lesser' to Thor for most of, if not all of his life for seemingly no reason at all. (He 'feels' he's in Thor's shadow because he blatantly is. There's clear favouritism not just from Odin, but from all of Asgard.)

   He never wanted the throne, nor did he actually want power or popularity, he just wanted someone to tell him that he was worthy, he wanted someone to tell him he was worth something and that he wasn't a monster like the other Jotuns were. (This is far clearer in the deleted scenes, where Loki hesitates to take the throne in the first Thor movie, and even looks to his mother, the only person who really seemed to love him, before taking it. As well as his clearly more lovable interactions with Thor before it was revealed that he was Jotun.)

   I mean, hell, he tried to commit suicide at the end of the first Thor movie when his father, whom he tried to get recognition from, and who was certainly the biggest issue with his self-esteem, rejected him yet again.

   I feel like this is most prominent when you take into account that he IS a Jotun, a being that he was raised to hate and fear. He believes he's a monster, and that coupled with his already problematic self-esteem just makes it apparent that he has the exact opposite problem that a narcissist has.   He does deeply care for other people as well. Frigga being the biggest example, in Dark world, he was heartbroken and devastated by her loss. (And the fact that the last thing he said to her was that she 'wasn't his mother' certainly didn't make it better.) Or in Infinity War, where he recognizes Thanos' plan to kill 'half' of everything, so, seeing as he's one of two brothers, gets Thanos to kill him so Thor will get out safely. Literally sacrificing himself for his brother, who he, on all accounts, shouldn't have cared enough to help there if he was a narcassist.

   The mind stone and the sceptre weren't mind controlling Loki, but it was messing with his head, as is seen in-universe as well as mentioned in interviews. This is seen where he stabs Thor, as he's clearly shaken by what he's just done, even if you can only see this reaction for a few moments. He also doesn't believe in what he's saying in Avengers when he's telling the people around him to kneel, that's why Phil claims that he lacks conviction: Because he really does, he's doing all of this because he's hurting, and the mind stone is manipulating him, he doesn't actually believe anything he's saying there.

   Before anyone brings it up as well: Ragnarok and the Loki TV show are pieces of MCU lore that should be taken with a grain of salt. Many things said in Ragnarok are inconsistent with the other movies (See Sif apparently having to prove that women can be warriors, yet, the Valkyries existed. Or the fact that apparently the Valkyries died before Thor's time but Thor always wanted to join them? Or the 'we were eight at the time' line, when Thor and Loki, being Asgardian/Jotun, age differently than humans, so by that point, would've actually been infants. The Loki show as well, Sylvie and the entire situation revolving around that comes with many character and story inconsistencies, such as magic seen not working in the TVA but apparently Sylvie can still use it in another episode.)

   Basically, from where I'm standing, this diagnosis doesn't seem to make any sense? It makes more sense to say that he's faking narcissism just so he can look strong and more in control, while on the inside continuing to feel unworthy and unlovable. Lashing out not because he's truly hateful, but because, as you've said in another video: 'Hurt people, hurt people.' (Again, something I have sadly been through.) I'd also like to point out, in this way, his mischief seems more like a cry for help. As many will point out, if someone is neglected enough in early life, they're likely to develop a mentality of 'any attention is good attention', which seems to be pretty in-line with a lot of 'mischief' he pulls.

   But hey, I'm not a therapist, and that's just my opinion.

Note: Narcissists aren’t inherently bad people. Don’t write them off as ‘evil’ or ‘monsters’. Not all of them are. Putting everyone in boxes like that for mental disabilities or neurodivergence is doing nothing but perpetuating harmful rhetoric and harming people.

...With that being said though, Loki ain’t it, chief.

Real talk though: Cinema therapy’s video on Loki is stupid as hell. ‘Loki genuinely believes he is superior’ is a direct quote, and as you can read from the above post, that statement is blatantly wrong on its own.

If I got anything wrong, feel free to mention so. I want to be sure I get as much correct as possible in this as not to miss anything or perpetuate any harmful stereotypes, I just went off of what was described in the video.

One of my favourite dumb but funny moments in fantasy/sci-fi books or shows is when everything from the characters, the locations, the houses, to the animals have crazy weird names, like fantasy names that are basically just a bunch of syllables smooshed together, but then one of the main characters or even the main character has the stupidest real life name ever.

My favourite example: the Dune series. All the weirdest names under the sun for everything in that series and then one of the main characters name is Paul. Like why is his name Paul?? (i know there is actual story reasons for it but still) One of the worst white boy names ever imo. His last name is Atreides, and his first name is Paul?? Like we were apparently smart enough up to that point to comprehend all the other weird names but the main character had to be the most recognizable basic name ever. Like come on.

Hilarious and infuriating at the same time.

An analysis on Pavia from Reverse1999 (Alternative Title: Me yapping about Pavia's backstory and making headcanons/personal interpretation based on the crumbs of lore we get 😭)

I recently thought about this. I've been grinding in this game cause it's so pretty and the voice acting is delicious. That's my own opinion though. And I want to write this down because It will consume me of I don't.

So all you Pavia stans and fans, this one is for y'all since there is only a handful of stuff about him online.😭🥹

So if any players main/use Pavia a lot and build up Bond with him we get his backstory and more voiclines. And spoiler, in Pavia's second character story, it mentions how he was literally abused/neglected from his legal guardian (bitch-ass aunt) because according to her, he looked closely resembling her mother(aunt's sis).

Also that, the aunts sister (Pavia's mum) is apparently dead??? But present Pavia states She's in "an asylum in Rome in probably her middle ages" and "he's never visited her".

So...does he believe she's still alive? Or did the aunt tell him that his mother was just 'insane' and 'unwell' that she was sent to an asylum and was the reason he was under her care? Never informing her own nephew about the passing of his mother?? Cause man.....that's kind of messed up if so. 🫠😶

I'll assume that Pavia's mom, being a single parent since the dad was 'missing', felt overwhelmed or inadequate to be a mom and left him with her sister (the aunt). Since the aunt described her sister as 'sorrowful' 'who abandoned her' and that she 'left behind her troublesome kid'.

I want to believe that Pavia's mom did love him. To some extent. She sang rhymes for him when he was probably a toddler (mentioned in one of his voice lines). She probably sang them so often to him that a grown Pavia can vaguely recall her lullabies. She probably thought that she really wasn't cut out to be a mom; he already had a 'missing' father, what can she do? Keep in mind that this is probably set in the late 70's or early 80's. And based on the societal steriotypes/stigmas, this reasoning seems plausible. And maybe thought that the best decision was to leave him in the care of her sister.

Or perhaps she was in a dangerous situation because she did apparently 'died a few years later' after "going into the city."

Was she in a tight situation? Was this perhaps linked to why Pavia's father was missing? Maybe the family was involved with a crime group or dangerous people? I find it suspect that his father was said to be missing, and that the mom died a few years later after dropping off her son with the aunt.

Going by the later assumption, could this have been a decision to protect her son? If so....it just makes Pavia's backstory and with the way his aunt treated him makes his story that much more tragic and unfair.

But back to the aunt.

The sister...now being tasked to look after a nephew who resembled her sad, irresponsible and 'selfish' sister, she confines him to a basement 24/7 to not look at him because of her personal issues/resentment towards his mother.

Pavia as a child calls out to her, fucking apologies for something he had no control over (his looks, his mom's decision), and is angry at this treatment. (Which honestly, fuck the aunt bro. Fuck Pavia's aunt bro, me and the homies hate Pavia's aunt. The kid did nothing wrong. Just because you resent his parents doesn't excuse the poor treatment you push onto the child. Your biological sister left him in your care and then later on died, the least you can do is provide for probably the only living relative you have left.)

Maybe this is linked to why Pavia has such a flamboyant and artistic style in appearance. Dyed white hair, but his natural dark roots are showing. Tinted glasses, to obscure his silver blue eyes and deep shades under his eyes. Random jewelry on his hands he doesn't really care for. The varies ink on him that make his skin a canvas. The cool ass piercings.

And while this could be a tactic to keep his identity a secret or untraceable for the authorities due to his job as an independent merc, just maybe..... he didn't want to be reminded of who he looked like whenever he looks at himself.

Maybe he didn't want to resemble his mother. It was because of his appearance that his aunt confined him to solitude. Something he had no control over, but as he got older....he gained control over how he looked and dressed. He never visits her in the asylum, she was the second person who abandoned him and the cause of his aunts hatred towards him. So....he probably has either a neutral or negative towards his mother.

In the basement, he develops a very unhealthy lifestyle; having no real concept of time, little sunlight, the sound of dripping water and pests constantly providing an uneasy atmosphere, but he develops his arcanum.

His imaginary friends, who watch over him and keep him warm. Since the humans who were supposed to do that, failed him so horribly.

His imaginary friends who bloomed from the darkest shadows of the basement due to his budding arcanum. Quiet literally.... byproducts of his own loneliness, perhaps yearning to be a part of a family, and strong arcanum.

He couldn't and wouldn't rely on any human, he had to fend for himself.

And because of this, he became an "independent mercenary" with a fatal flaw of " lacking in collaborative skills". He is good at what he does...but his employers "can't stand his work ethic of ignoring his coworkers". He comes across as having an unlikable personality and rudeness. He has a hard time getting along with other people. And honestly? Who can blame him. With the way he was raised...no wonder he doesn't like people in general.

But why should he? Why should he rely on people? His own biological family left him alone in that basement, he never developed any real friends as a child, he didn't get the chance to grow up like a normal child.

He had no one but he made it work. So why should he start to rely on people? For them to abandon him or betray him?

His former boss had planned to betray him, to kill him. So Pavia struck first, keeping only his tie clip as memorabilia.

Pavia is a lone wolf....as corny as that sounds. But he grew up alone, in a dark den. So close yet so far from human society, he made friends from the shadows that kept him company. That once lonely confinement didn't seem so lonely after a while, he grew to find comfort in his predicament.

Adapting and pushing ahead, finding a twisted sort of 'fun' 'excitment' and 'joy' in the most tragic and unfortunate circumstances; his job as a merc and the 'unsavory' nature of his job.

_______________________________________________

Pavia has become one of my favorite characters in media, despite the media he originates from having limited personal information about their playable characters.

But I think this is also a reason why he's so interesting to me. It leaves little crumbs and pieces of background that is mostly left to be assumed by the player's/reader's interpretation. It's fun to assume and make these little narratives and head cannons about them.

And the fact some parts of his story hit a wee bit close to home. Just a little though. I mean... it is unfair and so infuriating for a child to be antagonized or disliked by family just because they look more like one parent than the other.

But ye....this is just my own personal interpretation of this characters background. Mostly just me yapping and connecting the dots on silly head canons. I should write a one shot or series about this guy. He's such a goob.

Defending Luther 2: Electric Boogaloo

This will be a sequel to my previous post defending Luther but this will be a character analysis(my first actually). I would like to thank the kind people on a TUA discord server who I had a nice chat with about Luther as a character. So lets begin

Luther is number 1, with the power of super strength and enhanced durability he is the leader of The Umbrella Academy. Although you may think that because he is Number 1 he is the most important but he is quite the opposite. Thanks to a good pal on discord, I have learned that the numbers go from the least powerful to the most powerful(according to the creators), which would make Luther the least powerful. 'But Floral!' I hear you shouting, 'he prides himself being number 1 and he's Reginalds golden child, why would he care is Luther wasnt powerful?' Well let me explain. Its a grooming tactic, a common emotional grooming tactic is being kind to your victim to gain their trust and make them vulnerable to abuse. Sound familiar? Luther is the weakest link, Reginald stroked his ego to get him to be his perfect little soldier which caused a rift in the siblinhs relationship. Reginald MADE them hate each other so they would see each other as competition, which in turn made them vulnerable to his false praise. A child strives for attention and affection, especially Luther in this case, as said before in the show Luther is highly sensitive. He gets overwhelmed by his emotions and often crumbles when they become to much for him. Perhaps Reginald taught him that his sensitivity is a weakness which is why he's so emotionally stunted, not wanting to disappoint his father. He never saw anything wrong with Reginalds parenting, he's the most emotionally naive and he slurped up all of this scum bags bull shit. He didnt understand why it was so bad for the others because Luther was treated differently because Reginald saw him as a weak link.

Now we get into his relationship with Allison, its weird and gross but it has a reason. Yet again thanks to someone on discord, I realized that Allison and Luther didnt see eachother as siblings. They were more than that because they had a special bond, they had eachothers back and that trust turned into love. They were children, they are not blood related and they once again never saw themselves as siblings so to them they never saw anything bad about it. Luther's pining for Allison is a result of their abusive childhood, when you're in a miserable state of living you find anything to bring you joy. That thing for Luther was Allsion, in a way she was his light in their dark fucked up childhood. Does it make it right? No of course not but it sheds light upon why they like each other. Don't forget that they are very awkward around each other, because their relationship never went anywhere, they never kissed and they never did anuthing romantic at all. Luther was a virgin for 30 years until he had a mental breakdown in season 1 and had sex with the rave girl. Allison had a daughter and a husband, she had her own life when she left home. Now in season 2 when Luther find out that Allison is married he has a small breakdown and stress eats(because he is emotionally stunted and cant deal with his emotions in a healthy way). For years he lived in a fantasy world, where he and Allison would end up together and live happily ever after, but that fantasy was a dream that he made up to get through life. He is upset that Allison didnt wait for him because he truly thought she would but he does end up getting over it, because he's grown as a character. He is happy for Allison and sure he's still upset but he understands, he understands how alone she was and he... Forgives her. His fantasy and dreams were smashed when he finally opened his eyes to Reginalds bullshit, he was blissfully ignorant for his whole life because it was his coping mechanism, to deny everything. He's a poor kid who never had a REAL chance to grow up, being subjected to his fathers impossible standards and getting turned into a ugly monster in return.

So that's all I can say for right now, in short he deserves a hug. Let me know how I did, this is my first character analysis :D

ZOSIMOV APPRECIATION POST

my guy literally had one bad line in the entire book

^ a document of Zosimov moments (by me)

please i cannot be the only one who loves him because he's actually the nicest person ;-;

If Sanji ever hits a woman, his character is ruined forever

How I, as a woman, came to enjoy Sanji's chivalry trait even if I dislike it.

Now, notice how I said "chivalry" and not "pervet", because I actually quite enjoy his morals, but i fucking loathe his gags with the nose blood and all. This perverted size I do my best to ignore and at the very least tolerate, because I honestly believe Sanji's good character traits surpass this goddamn bad bits.

(This is going to be a long long essay, because I’ve been thinking about that Black Maria fight again and I wanted to give my two cents to his character development in detriment of my calculus exam tomorrow which I haven’t studied one bit. Also there’s going to be no images because I don’t fucking know how Tumblr works I’m new)

So, about his chivalry and the whole "won't hit a woman thing".

At first, I was very pissed about it. If it was in any other piece of media, not hitting a woman (as much as its a double standart) it's not exactly bad per se. It's not something I would applaud but rather think it's a failed flex of the writers to show themselves Oh So Manly and So Full of Outdated Morals. Regardless, not all that much of a bother. In real life, not hitting a woman is a thing and its not a bad one, since not every woman is able to GG combo a 6 foot tall jerk. And depending on how close your fictional world is to real life, this chivalry becomes more and more justified.

But One Piece is not your everyday fantastical fictional world. It's a whole ass big planet that keeps on moving with its own rules, physics and culture. A world a lot bigger than our own that expends to metaphysical standards. In One Piece, even if regular woman are shown to be a tad weaker than most regular man, its not by a lot when these randoms could die to an actual strong character to the same swing of a sword.

However, when Oda shows strong, powerful characters, they are so regardless of their gender. And One Piece has some STRONG female characters. I mean painfully strong. In a planet so big as theirs, its not a surprise woman has taken some Big Girl Pills. I don’t think it's up to discussion that woman can be seen as deadly powerful in this world as man.

But as refreshing as it is, this gender roles in One Piece come crumbling down once you add this chivalry shit.

Because when you have big women villains that can eat a whole island in two seconds, or women that can murder a whole army with one move, having a character refusing to fight feels demeaning. It’s like you are underestimating these powerful lads that can literally kill your nakama. What, you don’t think they can actually do damage to you, you fucking prick?

And it’s contradictory, to show these woman so strong and yet be seen so weakly by characters you were supposed to like. It feels demeaning to them, and it feels demeaning to you, a 12yo that was starting to really like see these woman achieving so many big things.

And Sanji is one of those characters you were supposed to like. Because he’s funny, strong, kind, a good cook, a good friend, a person you would love to know in real life. But still, he has this flaws that ick you so fucking much, flaws that get more and more evident as the story progresses.

Don’t get me wrong, I love OP, I have a tattoo of One Piece, Sanji is one of my favorite characters. However, I stopped reading for a while before WCI because, even though the story is amazing, I was getting really bothered with this whole woman situation. At some point, a trait that was exclusively Sanji’s that I was willing to ignore seemed to take this whole world by storm

Because the story portrays Sanji as dumb for not fighting woman, but at the same time, quite noble. And it pissed me off so much it took me four years to read One Piece again. Mainly because I wanted to catch the Wano arc finished, but also because I was so done that I could only pray this sexism situation got better over time and it was only a weird phase of Oda.

AND OH BOY HOW IT WAS

Recently reading WCI, I remembered everything I loved about Sanji, why I enjoyed his smile and his brains so much, and why he was one of my favorite characters ever. It wasn’t just uneducated 12yo me that was overlooking issues, Sanji is genuiely a good guy. Believe me, I’m 20, a woman in STEM that deals with sexism every single day, I’m plenty educated now.

Speaking of which, this is already very long and I really should study for that calculus exam but now I’m getting heated up.

Because WCI touches and highlights the best parts of Sanji, and fuck you if you disagree (... /j)

It called for my attention how Oda kept talking and hitting themes surrounding “humanity” in Whole Cake Island, and finally some things fell in place for me. 

This chivalry of Sanji is a character trait, that even if annoying sometimes, is still a character trait meant to be seen perhaps as a flaw, but also as a product of his humanity and kindness.

Because the world in One Piece doesn’t think the same way as Sanji. Luffy would kick a woman, he won’t give a single damn fuck, and we are supposed to like Luffy plenty! Even if Oda has his lows in how he deals with the perception of woman in One Piece, this double standard morality is exclusively a Sanji thing.

Not only is a Sanji thing, but also a Zeff thing.

That scene particularly stuck with me, where Zeff says that if Sanji would ever hit a woman, he would kick Sanji’s ass and then kill himself. When Sanji asked why on his good mind would he do that, Zeff responds “It’s the price a parent has to pay. Don’t become something I hate.”

And oh, OH, what a line. Because after hearing from his biological father he would be embarassed if the world ever discovered a failure was his son, it must have meant a lot for Sanji to hear Black Leg Zeff (the best person he has ever encountered besides maybe his mother) declaring so proudly he was Sanji’s parent.

It gives not only a reason for Sanji be one of the only characters with this mentality, but also justify why he is so strongly convict with this morality. He doesn’t want to be a failure again. Not to Zeff. And he doesn’t want to live in a world where he’s too ashamed to look his father in the eye.

And, in a vacuum, this scene must have felt like a cheap excuse of Oda to not change the character. But combining with the whole Whole Cake Island (ha, whole whole), this shows exactly what type of person Sanji is.

Because, as I said before, his chivalry is a product of his kindness and humanity (such a thing his brothers doesn’t have), but also is a mark Zeff left for him. Screaming without actually screaming that Vinsmoke Judge is not Sanji’s real father, because his actual dad made sure to raise well. To make him become a good person by his own ideals. Sanji has Zeff’s ideals because Zeff is his dad, and in result, everything about Sanji is a direct contrast of his biological siblings.

Also, uniting everything together, knowing damn well where his chivalry came from, it’s safe to assume that if Sanji ever loses that sense of morality, it would be a big bad thing. As in bad, bad thing.

Rather we like it or not, his morality is strong and tied directly with his humanity. If Sanji ever hits a woman, if he loses this sense of right and wrong, it means we lost Sanji as we knew him - a kind hearted boy, a strong chef, a strawhat that would die for his friends.

So in Wano, when this “happens”, it feels like Oda warning us.

If Sanji ever hits a woman, you all better be shock in terror.

I don’t know if I misjudged Oda when I was 16, or if he was indeed telling a bad story before realizing and fixing it, but Wano feels like a redemption arc. Because above all that, we also have good LGBTQ representation that felt almost surreal, and one of the best One Piece arcs ever told in terms of story, but also, good Sanji moments, reminding us all of the person he is and who he became after WCI.

And for those who says this means Sanji won’t get character development ever, I present to you: Black Maria incident.

I see a lot of people disliking strongly how Sanji screamed for Robin’s help. But to me, it felt amazing to see Sanji actually trusting his friends. Because he won’t hit a woman, but he doesn’t need to die because of that. He has plenty of strong friends that can watch his back and do what he can’t do while he does what they can’t. 

Not only that, but him screaming for Robin specifically shows that he acknowledges the women on his crew are strong. Strong enough to fight for him, strong enough to handle themselves. And also shows how he trusts them. Trusts that they won’t die, trusts their power, trusts that he won’t need to save them because it’s his time to be saved.

Not to mention the whole sacrificing thing he has going on, but that one was plently adressed on WCI.

And you have all the right to dislike this character trait as long as you realize it’s, you know, a character trait. And one that holds a lot of simbolism. I eventually came to enjoy the weight this chivalry holds, but it’s up to you.

That’s it. Thanks for reading. I’ll definitely go study for that calculus exam now

hey since you’ve posted two pieces in a row about my boy Scout I was wondering if maybe you could write more your thoughts/your hcs about him? I think he’s really interesting and I don’t often see people realize that he’s more complex that what he seems, like this man just seems very sad inside. i really like your analyses and your takes are some of my favorites

hope you have a good day!

Appreciate it! Although I probably won't say anything particularly new... Okay, let's talk about Scout!

Though he no doubt wears the persona of a confident cool guy, protecting his ego from vulnerability, I wouldn't say there's sadness inside him. More accurate would be fear.

People with sadness baggage are pretty passive and quiet. And Scout's reaction is to hit, run, scare away, cling anxiously to the object of security. That's fear. He's fearful.

He doesn't think about it much, he's a pretty happy guy in the environment he's in. But if something makes him go off the rails and he starts, God forbid, thinking.....

His core fear is not living up to his place in the world. He knows there's a place for him, but for some reason he feels like people think he's not good enough to take it. Anyone better and stronger could take his place at any time. He's on bird's rights here.

Growing up with older brothers, being not good at school, being the smallest and youngest mercenary of the team, this feeling doesn't leave him ever. It's a tiresome inner struggle: "How do I make my stay secure?", "How do I become worthy?"

Falling into this cognitive trap of searching for self validation in the outside world instead of inside of himself, he was doomed to be stuck in ambivalence:

To continue to pretend, risking being exposed as an imposter, or to be sincere and inevitably endure the unbearable pain of rejection and loneliness?

He laughs and taunts and overexplains himself so much. He clings to the only thing he's better than everyone at. He overcompensates; he demands attention and tries to make himself bigger. He hates being alone as it basically feels like being actually pushed off his place in the world. He clings to people but immediately pushes them away for being too dangerously close to finding out his fears. He needs to be with everyone to know and to control what they think about him.

And it never makes him calm down anyway, since all those efforts take a lot of energy. Tiresome to be, tiresome to pretend. And the prize is nowhere near the sight.

This loop of pain will never end, unless he breaks the very core mindset of his. The answer is stepping into this fear, but he can't even think about it! It feels like death! His ego will die and it's going to feel like he's dying as a whole.

A full existential, primal fear of an child to be rejected by his parent. "Not worthy of living".

(Based on the Lise Bourbeau's model of 5 soul wounds: Abandonment)

Warning ⚠️ Major Spoilers For Episode 8 Of Hazbin Hotel!!

Does Lute Love Adam? She Was So Angry When He Dead, She Cried To The Heavens! Legit Cried! Hell, She Was Always By His Side, Sharing His Views On Demons & Redemption. She Always Flew By His Side & Seemed To Care For Him, I Was(And Still Am) Proud Of Nifty For Killing Adam, Don’t Get Me Wrong! But I Can’t Help But Feel Bad For Lute… No Matter How Much Of A Bad Person She Was.

Y’all Ever Realize How Strong Kurama/Kyuubi/Nine-Tails Chakra Is? Go watch •the Guardian Shinobi Arc• before reading this, Ok I know what you’re probably thinking ‘Ichiro we already know what Kurama can do his capabilities are limitless!’ I agree with that, but have you ever stopped and thought about Sora, and the impactions of a Fake Jinchūriki? You probably haven’t because the Sora arc is filler but he’s still important so let’s explore why: Sora maybe a Jinchūriki but unlike others, he’s a different type of disastrous! Now I don’t hate Sora, I actually really like him, He’s fun to watch! But something’s are hard to ignore. Like attacking the Hokage, attacking fellow Fire Country Residents, claims of wanting to take over the Village[not become Hokage no, take over the Village by force], trying to assassinate Certain people, amongst other things, so he’s not a good kid, but he’s also a troubled Kid, as anyone can guess being a Jinchūriki means not having a good childhood, as you can tell from someone like Garra, but unlike most, He had a chance at life, he wasn’t mistreated at first, that was until He unintentionally Used the Kyuubis Chakra destroying the fire temple, then people began to fear him and see him as nothing more than a monster , due to the harsh treatment at the temple, He has the same traits as most Jinchūriki: Loud, Brash, Sneaky, Embracive, Angry/Hateful. He still has respect for his surprisers. When First met Naruto it led to a Altercation, He is one of Asumas apprentices, He’s vary Easily manipulated as shown quite a few times, you’ll have to check out [Jacub Two2]s YouTube channel to learn more, I took inspiration from him! ——————————————————————————— Let’s get onto the actual reason why you’re here, Kurama! I’ll make this short, Sora almost turned into a second Kurama, He was stopped at 4-5 Tailed Mode, if he kept going he would have reached 9-Tails[if his body didn’t give out first, he’s not a Uzumaki] and turned into a second Nine-Tails! Although I like Sora, he’s a menace! He had not even a fraction of the Kyuukis Chakra and That was what he was able to accomplish.

Sonic HATES Being Wrong

Like…to an extreme degree. Let me elaborate.

This is a very interesting detail I’ve noticed ever since I made my Sonic’s Flaws post. Here, I’d like to talk about Sonic’s most fatal flaw because this conversation gets interesting. The flaw is one every variation of Sonic can be guilty of and one that causes the most damage to his world and even the people he cares about. If you disagree, I understand. Just hear me out and even if I don’t convince you, I hope this turns out to be a fun read regardless. Feel free to give me some context, correct me, or add information if you‘d like.

The Flaw

Sonic is terribly pertinacious and stubborn. Most people would think of Sonic Prime where he doesn’t listen to his friends warning him to not destroy the paradox prism, but when I think of Prime!Sonic I don't think of that. Especially since this version comes off more as an inexperienced teenager trying to figure things out. While in the games, he’s portrayed as rarely being wrong. Not because he’s perfect, but because Sonic never feels the need to change because of past victories. After all, if everything is going his way, why should he change, right? Well, this can be a problem. The scene in S3 ep3 where a few of the pirates were lost at sea, shows how truly stubborn Prime!Sonic (and Sonic in general), can be. He verbally refuses to take accountability for lost resources and unknowingly helps Nine have better predominance over them.

In this scene, No Place was decaying and Sonic finds out that the other pirate crew was stuck there. Everyone else, even the villains, reasonably says it’s too risky and he ignores them. Of course, he is within reason but if things went sour, it would’ve been his fault. Especially since that almost became a reality before the Chaos Council swooped in to help.

Near the end of the episode, Sonic says it’s a win for everyone, but Mr. Doc says, “Was it? Your little friends are safe, but at what cost? The fox can conjure up more minions with the snap of his fingers. Whereas our fleet is damaged, our troops are spent, and we’re almost out of time.” Surprisingly reasonable call out of the consequences of saving the pirates, if they don’t have enough resources, they were even more screwed than before. Then Sonic says, “I’m sorry but losing anyone is not an option.” While it’s warranted and makes sense for his character, it almost comes across as “We had to save them because I said so.” This is an example of Sonic not having a good argument by addressing the results of their battle. He does it a lot more than you’d think. Despite Sonic not listening to people being a bigger staple of Prime, I personally think it’s never expanded upon or executed well. Not to me anyway, but I don’t mind anyone disagreeing.

In any case, Sonic, as a character in every continuity, tends to “follow by his own rules” but this can be perceived negatively as “doing whatever he wants no matter who argues with him.”

Examples

Sonic Boom Rise of Lyric tackles this too. This is probably the least serious example but still can be a problem sometimes. This is S2 Ep 19 when an Eggman robot Clone tries to break Team Sonic apart and almost succeeds too. It doesn’t have much to do with this topic but I do like how in this episode when the drama started happening, Sonic for once in his life tries to talk abohut his feelings with Tails who turned out to be Steve. I know this has nothing to do with this discussion, but I just thought it was a funny thing to point out. The one time Sonic tries to talk about his feelings, he gets the door slammed in his face. It’s so mean-spirited and stupid. I love Sonic Boom!

But yeah, Rise Of Lyric also shows how his stubbornness can end up with the world being at stake. Or in the case of this episode have your friends grow apart.

The Sonic Movies tackles his shortcomings perfectly. I think he's pretty impulsive in all 3 movies. Mixing his perniciousness doesn't create the greatest meal. He's younger, so that would be expected. This scene is the most recent example. Sonic as a character tends to live in the moment and here, Movie!Sonic is playing a huge role in this category. He’s not even trying to hear anyone out. He’s in a constant rage at this point and can’t think clearly. He wants revenge on Shadow so much he loses himself. His brothers are so loyal to still allow him to get the Master Emerald despite knowing he wants it for revenge. Sonic's so hurt, he even forgets what they originally were there for.

I'm sure if Sonic choose to let his feelings consume him, he probably wouldn’t have saved the world. Why? Let’s just say things would’ve went out of control without Shadow. Sonic dogged a big tangent bullet for having mercy on Shadow.

Yeah, Archie/Reboot Archie didn’t mess around either. I'd say it’s sometimes as tense and bit worse due to him having the biggest ego and ongoing trauma. I'm surprised he didn't go insane. Notice how harsh he is in these instances. He’s overly angry here. Luckily, he has a large group of friends to help him take things down a peg and reminds him how they have his back. Even when worst comes to worst (which is an understatement), his friends are able to get him out of that mindset and put him back in reality. Hunbel him to put it bluntly.

In a way, Sonic's flaws in the Archie comics make me think he feels so guilty that he pushes himself beyond his limits as a way to make up for his loudmouth. Like in other versions, he feels the need to take on more than he can physically handle. He strains his body, mind, and entire being to accomplish tasks on his own because he believes he deserves the punishment. Alternatively, he might just be exhausting himself and attempting to take on more than he can manage. It’s not surprising, really.

This panel is insane for letting Eggy make a valid point. You can tell by his ears how Sonic’s getting visibly irritated. By the end of the argument, he gets super mad and can’t even find a good quip to back himself up. Because in a way, he knows Eggman has a point. That’s how I interpret it anyway.

Game or IDW Sonic is usually in denial when it comes to being wrong. He doesn’t address the issues directly but the person who calls him out for it instead. He’s the most experienced Sonic. I know some people use “mature” but I think experience is a better term due to how he doesn’t have arcs or character growth like other characters. More so he’s used to this song and dance, so his hatred towards being wrong comes from a place of thinking he’s got everything under control. Until it bites him in the butt.

You notice in most of these Sonic’s pretty angry and isn’t the biggest fan of being told off. Even in different continuities, the guy cannot argue without not being self-aware most of the time. The funny thing is he isn’t doing it selfishly. At least not in a typical way. To me, Sonic is the least selfish character in the franchise for a good chunk of the series. He sacrifices himself, gives people more chances than they deserve, and even takes the time to stop his main goals if it means helping someone else. But the guy cannot take the time to admit he’s wrong or his morals have consequences. Not because Sonic thinks he’s better than everyone. I don’t think Sonic sees himself in that way, but I do think he’s always in “I’ve done this thing plenty of times. As long as this thing works, I’ll keep doing it,” mode. Or in the case of Movie!Sonic, goes on instinct which is also a common part of his characterization.

Why Sonic Has This Flaw

Sonic never stops running; he charges head-first into any situation, always striving to do what's right. After all, he's the fastest thing alive. Sonic doesn't have the luxury of questioning himself or dwelling on doubts. While it's true that he has caused some issues, including in the games, he doesn't waste time feeling sorry for himself. The only times he's shown insecurity were during the Metal Virus arc, so interpret that as you wish.

This brings up another point. Crazy how much I didn’t notice, but most of the time, Sonic doesn’t like it when people disagree with him. Understandable, everyone doesn’t want to be wrong. But he takes it to the extreme at times. Like sometimes he's baffled when anyone challenges him. Sonic’s also never truly called out by the right people. I don’t mean Shadow, Espio, Knuckles, or the villains. I mean, Amy, Tails, Tangled, or other characters he’s inspired. People who look up to him. Sure, they try, but I can count on one hand how many times he actually listens. Sonic’s always so caught up in doing things his way that he disregards people who mean the most to him.

I mentioned this in my other post but he doesn't listen to Tails in Sonic 06 or Lost World, so the games count.

While Sonic often has valid points in his arguments with others, he frequently comes across as someone who needs to be right. He rarely allows others the opportunity to express their views or admits when he is wrong. This issue is often overlooked in stories where these conflicts arise, either because there isn't enough time to address them or they remain unanswered altogether. This makes sense, considering that Sonic typically doesn’t undergo character arcs canonically. However, I appreciate the presence of characters like Shadow, Knuckles, Surge, Kit, and certain Archie characters like Scurge. They serve to challenge Sonic’s morals and illustrate that he isn’t always correct. If Sonic isn’t going to evolve as a character, at least these figures can show that his sense of freedom and living by his own rules doesn’t work for everyone. They can be portrayed negatively and can challenge his viewpoints. They can be questioned. They can be challenged. Sonic isn’t always right.

His passion shows that he truly wants things to work for everyone. His stubbornness drives him to the point of frustration as he strives to help others to live according to his ideals. However, at times his approach isn’t the most effective. You can see that Sonic genuinely hates this, yet he continues to push forward to help those in need. There’s something both beautiful and heartbreaking about that.

Conclusion

What’s funny is that Sonic rarely gets angry, so you could say this could be one of his few triggers. Along with people being unjust and other such.

Overall, Sonic has good intentions but the results of those intentions are severe. None of this is to imply Sonic’s a terribly written character. It’s just a serious flaw he has. Though listening to his friends more would help.

I’d be lying if I said I wouldn’t like a moment of his friends noticing a constant pattern of him being pertinacious and not paying attention to anyone’s protest. I wouldn’t want it to come out of nowhere, but it’d be an issue that’d progress over a large amount of time and add up. It could be dramatic or constructive depending on the situation and execution. Whatever character does it, they’d either talk to him about it or physically show the outcomes of his actions. They do it all the time in other media but not canonically. This is just random speculation though. I don’t know if I’m in over my head but I hope someone got something out of this.

All of this is not to say Sonic never takes accountability or listens to his friends. SA1 scene with Amy, when he apologizes to Bell in IDW for being too standoffish, and plenty of other examples. Like the end of Sonic movie 3. That Sonic Boom episode where he apologized for not working with his team. And endless moments in Archie and Reboot Archie. Sonic isn’t unreasonable. Just 9 times out of 10 he can get a big head. That’s all.

Stay Creative! 💜

miya’s character analysis - diluc ragnvindr

long as hell because my love knows no bounds <3 cw discussions of ptsd

Keep reading

OMG YES. IF YOU HATE LAVENDER BROWN, ESPECIALLY BECAUSE SHE DATED RON, PLEASEEEEEEEEE GTFO.

Cho and Lavender were villainized by the narative in favor of Ginny and Hermione

Rowling despises teenage girls with traditionally feminine interests. She only treats those who don’t want to be like “other girls” or the pick-me girls well in the narrative. It’s clear she projects a deeply personal issue onto certain female archetypes, which makes me think she must have a lot of unresolved resentment, probably dating back to her childhood. She portrays Lavender as foolish for being desperate over Ron, when in reality, that’s not foolish at all—it’s completely normal for a teenage girl experiencing her first relationship and not knowing how to handle her emotions. She also mocks Lavender and the Patil twins’ interests, like Divination, girls’ magazines, or gossip, as if those things were inherently frivolous and shallow. It’s as if being a girl and enjoying “girly” things automatically makes you stupid or as if femininity itself is incompatible with having depth and other, more “serious” interests.

Likewise, through Harry’s praise of Ginny for not crying—contrasted with Cho, who does—she implies that sentimentality, emotional expression, or a lack of self-control are negative traits, while repressing emotions (which is traditionally associated with masculinity) is a positive thing that makes you “tougher” or “stronger.” Narratively, Rowling always favors Hermione for “not being like other girls” and turns Ginny into the ultimate pick-me girl. She’s a character who barely matters or has any relevance throughout the series until she suddenly transforms into the perfect cishet teenage boy fantasy: the girl who is super hot and sexually desirable but at the same time doesn’t waste time with “girly stuff” because she’s too busy acting just as aggressive as any macho guy, being hyper-focused on sports, and being “one of the boys,” cracking jokes, being rough, and acting cool. She’s a girl bro, the embodiment of the perfect woman according to male fantasy, not female. It’s as if she were designed by a hormone-driven teenage boy rather than a woman in her thirties.

Ginny is a disaster of a character from a gender analysis perspective—truly atrocious. And then there’s Luna, who doesn’t bother anyone because she’s too weird, yet she’s accepted by the “not-like-other-girls” girls precisely because of that weirdness. She’s the Manic Pixie Dream Girl, completing the trifecta of contemporary misogynistic female stereotypes embodied by Hermione, Ginny, and Luna—the only teenage female characters who are curiously treated positively and praised by the narrative. The rest are torn down at some point, specifically for reasons directly related to their gender.

Welcome back to a re-written 2012 Donatello analysis!

I have posted a 2012 Donnie analysis here previously discussing his obsessional behaviour, and it was quite well received. However, it is not as put together as I would've liked it to be. Vague ideas were mashed into a post after I ranted about aspects of his character to an online friend.

But, I've had some more time to think - this will be a bit longer, and cover some different scenes and ideas, as well as repeating some of the things in my previous analysis - in general, hopefully a more concise and enjoyable analysis of his character.

: IMPORTANT NOTE : To make it clear, I do not support stalking/obsessive behaviour - whatever the reason behind it may be - and I do not want to make it seem like I am infantilizing Donnie in this analysis.

The whole point of this analysis is that I like to be aware of characters' less-than-ideal traits and discuss what the root cause of them might be. The possible/suggested causes does not excuse this behaviour, rather explains it. And people should still be held accountable if they have made another person upset/uncomfortable.

Without further ado, onto the analysis.

I think Donnie's biggest issue is how he looks.

In the 2012 iteration, we never really see any of the turtles have a strong desire to be human, to change how they already are. Mikey sometimes doesn't understand that humans will be scared of him, (Like when he tries to return a cat to its owner, dismissing his brothers when they warn him the owner would be scared of him) but Mikey never has a big moment and lashes out like, ‘I want to be a human so I can make more friends!’

We also see Mikey wonder what he'd look like as a human in an episode after Donnie creates retro-mutagen, in which Mikey assumes he'd turn into a human instead of a regular turtle if he were to use retro-mutagen on himself. It is played as a joke though, as he is seen smiling in the scene following and doesn't seem to show any true disappointment/distress etc towards being how he already is - a mutant.

Raph openly declares himself as ‘handsome’ in Season 1, Episode 2 - so that rules out Raphael, and I don't remember any scenes with Leo being upset or having a negative view attached to being a mutant but please correct me if I'm wrong.

Interestingly enough, Donatello seems to have the most trouble coming-to-terms with the fact that he's a mutant and can't change that out of his brothers.

Outside of being a mutant, it is implied that Donnie already has a fragile self-image anyway.

Remember the episode Turtle Temper? I think it's the third episode of the first season. But at one point, the other turtles are instructed to shoot arrows at Raphael while he has to try and avoid them - Splinter makes it clear, however - that the others are allowed to insult Raphael.

I've seen a content creator say that the insults they throw at Raphael could be more internalised opinions they have on themselves rather than genuinely thinking these crude things about their own brother - think of it like bullying, in the sense that you're often told ‘bullies like to make fun of others because they're insecure themselves’.

People often take out their anger about their insecurities and place them onto other people if given the chance.

Leo says, ‘And you're always whining, poor me, nobody understands me.’ While this is easily applicable to Raph as an insult from Leo, Leo has also had his own fair share of moments where he has gone to Splinter complaining that the others aren't respecting or listening to him, that they don't understand the burden he holds as leader.

Mikey tells Raph he moves like a bloated buffalo. In other words, you're slow. You can't keep up.

And Donnie says, ‘Oh! You can't keep your back straight during Omote Kote Gyaku! And you're ugly!’ I think the first part of this insult is what really hints this is more so them projecting views of themselves than genuinely insulting Raphael. Donnie, out of all of them, is most likely to feel insecure about his height, a lot of teenagers can feel awkward or uncomfortable as a result of their growth spurts, tall individuals are also more prone to slouching.

Donnie also probably spends quite a lot of time hunched at his lab desk, which could also contribute to his posture. I'm pretty sure he is also called ‘scrawny’ in an episode by Karai, but if not Karai, some other character, and Donnie responds, ‘And I'm not scrawny! I'm svelte!’

Raph has also insulted Donnie's looks before, and, although it is unclear if it's a common occurrence, knowing Raph's character it has most likely happened on more than one occasion.

Donnie : And why do you keep grabbing me by the face? What is wrong with my face?!

Raph : Do you want me to list the reasons alphabetically or in descending order of grossness?

So regardless of being mutated or not, it seems like Donnie just has a generalised lack of confidence and some issues surrounding how tall he is.

But onto his issues regarding being mutated.

Donnie might’ve previously not had any issues with being a mutant. Before, it might’ve been just a general lack of confidence, as I have already said. Before April, his brothers would've been the only thing to compare himself to. He lived in a home with only mutants for fifteen years of his life - so had normal teenage issues of going through puberty and insecurities. Tons of people dislike their growth spurts, which is why Donnie's issues at first might seem like normal things for a teenager to worry about. Donnies biggest issue was how scrawny and lanky he saw himself.

But when they meet April, there is a glaring difference.

Suddenly, there is somebody in his life who isn't a mutant like him. It becomes abundantly clear to Donnie that from somebody else's viewpoint, their biggest issue with him wouldn't be his tooth gap or his height, but the plain fact that he's so different. Inhuman. Out of the ordinary. A mutant.

In ‘Mutagen Man Unleashed!’ Donnie says, ‘I'm worse than a nerd - I'm a freak! We're all total and complete freaks-’ This shows that Donnie went from having individual and relatable insecurities to believing that simply being a mutant inherently means you are ugly.

Especially when you consider the fact that, individual-traits-wise, Donnie and Casey both share the same traits, they both have issues with their teeth, and they’re both scrawny and fairly tall - realistically Donnie should believe they're on somewhat equal grounds of ‘unattractive’ qualities, but Donnie seems to believe Casey is naturally at an unfair advantage because he’s human.

As I said, Donnie has begun to associate his very being with ugliness, and so sees Casey as a threat thinking April will lean more towards Casey for the sole fact he's human. Donnie doesn't think that perhaps Casey's behaviour or the way he treats April is what might potentially win her over - when Donnie is ranting to Mutagen Man about why April might be hanging out with some punk kid (Casey) the conclusion he comes to is ‘because he's human, that's why.’

With a smile on his face and a look of anger in his eyes, the way he phrases it and his expression almost comes across as, ‘I knew it.’ It's like he's self-validating his presumptions at this moment.

Donnie tends to get scarily territorial over April, even going as far to try and forcibly push the two apart when April and Casey hug at the beginning of ‘A China-Town Ghost Story’, seemingly oblivious to the fact he could also possibly harm April in his shoving.

If he genuinely loved and cared about April as a person, he'd be more concerned about the fact he could hurt her - instead his eyes are on Casey this whole scene - his competition, the threat, the thing that might make his fears a reality.

Looks are a very important part of gaining a partner in society, Donnie might not love April as a person. Rather, he sees her as a piece of evidence that could potentially soothe his insecurities. If he wins her like some prize, it'd be like saying, ‘Look! I'm not ugly after all because someone wanted to be my girlfriend!’

If he loses April to Casey, it’d be confirming his idea that mutants, as a whole, are ugly.

This whole root cause of his obsessive and almost protective nature over April and wanting to keep her away from Casey really comes to light in the Season 2 episode, ‘Fungus Humungous’ where mutated fungi spreading across the sewers make our heroes hallucinate their worst fears.

Donnie has two scenes displaying his fears. The first is one of April, with sharp teeth and white eyes, and is a lot bigger than him. Which creates a feeling of inferiority, ‘Levels’ is a technique used in theatre. It refers to the use of different heights and positions to convey certain messages. It's often used to indicate status or communicate character relationships.

Here, it's a perceived relationship that Donnie has between himself and April. Donnie doesn't think mutants and humans are equal, Donnie truly believes that mutants are smaller or not as important as humans and his fear represents that visually by the way his vision of April quite literally looms over him.

Donnie doesn't think mutants are good enough. It's like the nerd not being good enough to hook up with the pretty, popular girl - reflecting back on what Donnie said earlier - ‘I'm worse than a nerd, I'm a freak.’ If we think of it on a ladder of ‘not being good enough’ he thinks being nerdy puts him below on that ladder, but right at the bottom, worse than being a nerd, is being a mutant. And that's why his vision of April is so ginormous. She's right at the top of that perceived hierarchy that Donnie has built up.

This vision of April calls Donnie an ‘ugly mutant freak’ it's unlikely April actually thinks this, but it's what Donnie thinks she does.

The next scene we see is a vision of a bunch of tiny April's kissing Casey.

I think it's noteworthy that the ‘ugly mutant freak’ part comes before the kissing Casey part. The two scenes are quite literally split into ‘Words’ and ‘Actions’. In the first scene, April has a sharp tongue that is used like a whip, going through Donnie's heart and subsequently breaking it.

‘To have a sharp tongue’ means being critical of someone, speaking in a way that is unkind though often clever. I think this shows that, over anything, it is April's words that break his heart more than her actions like kissing Casey. Mutants being seen as freaks is his actual biggest fear. He just doesn't want those fears to be confirmed - which is why that scene of April kissing Casey comes after.

This fear of humanities' dislike and rejection towards mutants existed before Casey came into the picture, he just became a threat and therefore added to Donnie's worries which is why Casey makes an appearance, but he isn't the main problem.

The first scene is what truly makes Donnie crack, he starts screaming, runs away, and shouts that he ‘doesn't want to hear anymore.’

-

In Season 3, an episode titled, ‘A Foot Too Big’ when Donnie starts to apologise for his behaviour, he says ‘I'm just… a mutant.’ The word ‘just’ implies that being a mutant is all Donnie has boiled himself down to, he doesn't think his other traits are worthwhile, like him being loyal, inventive, and funny because at the end of the day he thinks nobody will be able to see him outside of being a freak and therefore doesn’t care about other aspects of himself.

When April kisses Donnie at the end of this episode, he doesn't even seem to enjoy it like he usually does. Which is odd for Donnie, as he normally gets excited or gloats about being kissed by April to Casey. I know people say he's confused because April has a habit of leading both Donnie and Casey on, but I think the words she says right before she kisses him is what confuses him.

‘You're not just a mutant, Donnie, you're my mutant.’

The whole point of the episode is that Donnie is supposed to get a taste of his own medicine, where Bigfoot is following Donnie around. But Bigfoot is a monster. Donnie’s behaviour is being parallelled in a monster.

When Donnie is told, ‘now you know how April feels’ by Raph, he partly comes to the realisation that April feels like he is clingy and love bombs her with gifts, (Like how Bigfoot follows Donnie around and consistently makes Donnie soup) but Donnie also acknowledges that April is being followed around by something inhuman and that might play a part in making her uncomfortable.

If we, as the audience, are meant to look at Bigfoot as a parallel to Donnie, that should also include Bigfoot's other traits and the way other characters act toward her that prove Donnie feels ugly.

Bigfoot wants to look better and feels ugly. When she believes she is not good enough for Donnie, she asks April to help her give herself a ‘makeover’ before trying to show Donnie affection again.

Other characters, such as Leo and Casey, also make fun of how Bigfoot looks, with Casey asking, ‘You think she's his type?’ As a crude joke. Donnie has had his looks made fun of before, and his brothers seem to share similar sentiments that Donnie doesn't have a shot with April and thinks of his crush to be a waste of time - the other characters react the same way to Bigfoot's crush on Donnie.

And so when Donnie apologises to April, he not only feels the need to acknowledge his overbearing nature, but also to apologise for simply being the way he is, knowing she might feel embarrassed or uncomfortable that a ‘creature’ that has no shot with her is drooling over her and following her around.

After all, Donnie felt embarrassed when Bigfoot kissed him, and all of his peers laughed at him.

When Donnie was kissed in Target: April O’ Neil, it was directly after Donnie was thanked for his actions in saving April, and it made him feel good about himself in general, shouting ‘I looooove being a turtle!’ which is a rare instance of Donnie showing a positive attitude towards being how he is. Being loved in itself and being thanked for something understandable made him feel confident.

Donnie believes April likes Casey for being human, so when April says she likes him because he's mutant - for what he is, not who he is, it confuses him. Donnie thinks April doesn't care about who Casey is either, but Donnie thought he'd never be on equal grounds with Casey in terms of what he is, again, because he thinks mutants are lesser than.

He believes and everyone else around him believes that because he is a mutant he had no chance, at the beginning of the episode Raph said, ‘She's a girl, you're a giant talking turtle.’

Donnie believed who he was didn't matter because he thought what he was would make people dislike him.

And in April's words, who he is still doesn't matter, but she's showing a positive attitude towards him being a mutant. That's what confuses him so much.

April doesn't forgive Donnie’s apology for his obsessive behaviour, she forgives his apology for being different. April doesn’t say something like, ‘But you’re smart, loyal, determined,’ before kissing him, she says, ‘You’re my mutant’ before kissing him.

Donnie has never received positive comments from April about good aspects of his personality, or even comments about enjoying spending time with him - times Donnie has been kissed, hugged, and/or received comments of praise from April has been directly after acts of service where Donnie puts himself in danger for her wants/needs;

(Operation: Breakout, Season 1, in which Donnie goes on a solo mission to rescue April's father) When Donnie works tirelessly to resolve her wants/needs, (Donnie's several attempts to make retro-mutagen for her father) or when Donnie has literally almost died, (waking up after Donnie came close to dying in Dream Beavers, and after coming back post being molecularly scattered in ‘The Power Inside Her’)

This creates an extremely negative correlation in which receiving affection comes after self-sacrificing behaviour, putting her needs over his, or near death experiences, especially when you consider how Donnie's more tame and realistic attempts at affection are met with abandonment, dismissal, or odd looks.

When Donnie tries to offer hugs to April, she looks at him oddly, and Donnie quickly switches to ruffling her hair, and he seems to go stiff and looks anxious/awkward after. When Donnie calls her a nickname she agrees to ignore what was just said. When Donnie makes her a music box at the beginning of ‘A Foot Too Big’ she makes the excuse of needing to train and leaves Donnie by himself instead of addressing the issue if she didn't like the gift.

Hugs, nicknames, and gift-giving are met with negative responses that create negative feelings in himself as well.

Self sacrificing behaviour is met with positive reactions from April, as well as positive reactions from those around him as the action usually resolves some sort of problem (like Donnie rescuing April's father, the creation of Retro-mutagen) and even Splinter telling Donnie to ‘never give up hope’ in regards to pursuing April.

So Donnie now has two things to associate kisses/hugs with:

Self sacrificing behaviour.

Being a mutant.

And he doesn't understand.

-

I honestly think Don Vizioso is a physical manifestation of how Donnie feels. I always thought it to be a bit weird that a villain and a main character shared similar names, as Donnie has also been called ‘Don’ in the series as a nickname before.

Don Vizioso believed that mutants are freaks of nature that don't belong, a scientific mystery to be studied, which is scarily the same ideas that Donnie has about mutants.

Don Vizioso’s restaurant is the only building we see in the whole series with a ‘No Mutants’ sign. Donnie has a preconceived notion that the whole world is against mutants, in truth, barely anybody knows about them to say that’s true. All that hatred for what mutants are and the belief that mutants shouldn’t be accepted anywhere is all contained within Don Vizioso’s restaurant. Contained in Donnie’s mind.

I find it no coincidence that Donnie is the one to be put into a dehumanising situation and almost be dissected by Don Vizioso.

‘Vizioso’ translated into English, means things like depraved, vicious, immoral, and the next time Donnie has a run in with Vizioso, how is his actions perceived? Immoral. Vicious. He's quite literally going on a killing spree to face his own ideas, to confront Don Vizioso, his own anger and violence.

When Donnie is about to kill off Vizioso, Leo tells him to not lose sight of who he is, which makes Donnie pause.

Donnie believes mutants aren't ever going to be accepted by humans, that they're freaks. And nobody wants to believe that, he wants to erase those violent thoughts toward himself and other mutants by killing Don Vizioso, a manifestation of his own opinions - but if he kills, he is just going to prove what he thinks humans assume mutants are. Vicious monsters.

And that isn't who Donnie is, Leo reminds him of that. Maybe those negative thoughts of him being a freak won't go away, and maybe humans would actually think they're monsters if they ever got exposed - but if Donnie feeds into violent behaviours he's making those thoughts into true statements.

Donnie knows a killer isn't who he is, and in that moment Leo reminds him of that, he comes to terms with his mindset and realises he has the power to change how he thinks in a more healthy way, deciding not to kill Don Vizioso.

If you're part of a minority/marginalised group, you may struggle with things like internalised homophobia, racism, and ableism because of the way the society around you has built negative stereotypes around those groups. You may hate your own thoughts and hate the world for making you think that way.

It can be hard. If you act out in violence, unlike white, or straight, or able-bodied people, you are more likely to have your differences blamed for your violent behaviours. You feed into people’s stereotypes and negative ideas of certain groups unintentionally. If you struggle with internalised ableism, racism, homophobia/transphobia, the first step is coming to terms with your mindset, and finding a healthy way to accept who you are, and know that stereotypes and preconceived notions don't change you.

Never lose sight of who you are.

-

END SUMMARY:

2012 Donatello is a character with a complex and negative perception of who he is, with many things contributing to that fact.

At the end of the day, Donnie doesn’t seem to actively be after love or April as a person, rather simply a feeling of equality and confidence in general.

He wants to prove his thoughts that mutants are ugly wrong by gaining April as a girlfriend, aware that in society looks heavily contribute to having a romantic partner. Donnie seems to be afraid of humans rejecting mutants in general, but because April is the first human he has a personal relationship with, it’s shown through her.

As for equality, in relationships it's expected that you are treated equally and that no one is superior or inferior to the other, you both have equal say. Donnie is shown to feel that mutants are inferior and not good enough for humans, as shown by how much larger April is than him in his hallucination, and may also crave some sort of feeling of equality by getting into a relationship with someone he deems to be superior than him.

Donnie has also claimed April as some sort of thing to own, in the episode, ‘The Gauntlet’ by saying ‘There's a creature out there trying to hurt my April’ but apologetically changes it to just ‘April’ after he notices April's raised eyebrow at the choice of words. However, when April calls him ‘my mutant’ in ‘A Foot Too Big’ she doesn't stick around to see if he even likes it, or still wants to be in a potential relationship with her after the apology, quickly walking away.

And Donnie definitely doesn't seem to like it, being left confused and upset.

LEAVING NOTE : Thank you for reading, and I hope it was a bit more in - depth and well explained than the last analysis! I just want to say this isn't an attack on April’s character either - the writing isn't great in 2012, each character has noteworthy flaws and I don't think one character's behaviour is ultimately worse than another, including April's. Both her and Donnie are flawed, just like other characters, and I love them both.

Donnie while saying 'Because he's human, that's why.'

Donnie, at the end of 'A Foot Too Big.'

Warnings: I will be talking a lot about how terrible Donnie's crush on April is, and since I'm not an Apriltello shipper this will make it sound like I am shitting on Apriltello 2012 as a concept, but I'm actually just shitting on "Apriltello" as it is presented in the show.

This rant is also not really well structured, read at your own risk.

Okay so ever since I got Paramount + — because I got tired of getting viruses from indian websites when trying to pirate this goddamn show— I have watched TMNT 2012 a total of 5+ times, which means not only do I have a lot to say in general about this show but there is something that bothers me deeply, ever since the first season aired.

April O'Neil.

I know a lot of people shit on April in the show for how she treated Donatello, me included— and I stand by it, Cannon April is horrible — but honestly? Had she been a tad bit better written, there was a lot of potential for her character! There were so many good ideas, and all of them were WASTED.

So this is my character analysis of April O'Neil or, as I'm like to call it;

April O'Neil — The self insert of the teenage girl the writers had a crush on back in high school.

When I was 10 years old, I absolutely despised April because, naturally, I hated the love interest of most protagonists from the shows I watched because usually I felt they were badly written and other times were because I had a fictional crush on the protagonist, so in my child logic that meant I had to hate their love interests.

April was a prime example of that.

But as I've gotten older, I've realized a couple of things about April;

Firstly. April is written by grown ass men whose interactions with teenage girls likely doesn't extend further than that one time they got rejected by their crush in high school or telling their teenage daughter to go to her room, basing it off the way ALL female characters in the show are written.

Secondly, she is written by grown men who likely grew up having a fictional crush in previous versions of April.

This is... a recipe for disaster.

Look— April O'Neil and the way she acts in the show is written exactly the way adult men who are trying to write a teenage girl write teenage girls.

These dudes? They don't actually like or understand teenage girls. They had crushes on teenage girls, they thought they were hot, they might still think of the "what could have been" aspect if they didn't get rejected on prom night, but they do not respect teenage girls, they don't respect their thoughts, their feelings or their interests, and this not only means that April is a poorly written teenage girl as a result, but it also bleeds into the writing of other characters, mainly Donatello and Casey.

If you don't respect your teenage female character as a person, you're not going to write the teenage male characters to respect them either.

The writers clearly love April O'Neil, the concept. They try to sell you the idea that April is so cool, so cute/hot, this kind and empathetic soul, even though she barely does anything extremely cool or kind in the show??

The show is always trying to tell you what to think of April O'Neil, but the writing never earns that. In fact, it often shows the opposite.

The first time she sees the turtles? She screams AND is incredibly scared of them, which, understandable, but doesn't scream open-minded, does it?

When April finds out that Karai might have a semblance of a heart inside of her when they're fighting, instead of trying to create a connection with her and see if she can possible turn Karai to their side, she throws Karai down the subway stairs.

When she meets Dr. Falco with Donnie, and they're unknowingly discussing Dr. Rockwell with him, April keeps referring to the possible mutant experiments as MONSTROSITIES.

DONNIE IS RIGHT THERE!! She literally only stops when DONNIE had to express not once, but TWICE how uncomfortable he is. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out the giant mutant turtle is probably going to be uncomfortable hearing people call other mutants like him monsters.

Also— April is never really the one that tries to be kind of empathetic to mutants. She only stops the turtles from beating the shit out of Pidgeon Pete when he mentions her father. So much for someone with psychic powers. When Mutagen Man comes after her, she calls him DONNIE'S MONSTER.

Yes, I get she was pissed off with Donnie and the turtles still, but referring to a random kid who by no means deserved his fate as a monster is so fucked up, April?? How would she feel if Casey called her dad when he got mutated the first time a monster? She totally would've been angry at anybody who said that.

Also this raises so many questions. Did no one explain to April who Timothy was?? Did Donnie not tell her?!? Timothy just spent months stuck to Donnie's lab, watching everybody with his creepy ass eyes and organs and Donnie was making a voicebox for the poor guy and the information just never, reached April? That Timothy was this sorta weird sorta awkward teenage kid who got involved with things he shouldn't and got himself mutated?

I don't buy it. I get it not being mentioned in the show, but I feel like SOMEBODY would have mentioned it in passing to April at some point.

Moving on, a lot of people say the way April acts towards Donnie is annoying or shallow, which while totally 100% at certain points, I think a lot of people in the fandom, for one reason or another are incapable of fully empathizing with Cannon April, and while I genuinely think Cannon April is a BAD PERSON for several reasons, I feel that she doesn't deserve as much hate as she gets— especially not for the way she acts towards Donnie.

I mean, put yourself in her shoes for a nanosecond.

You've lost your mother in a mysterious accident or something 10 years ago. Your father likely doesn't talk a lot about it, and while that bothers you, you're just going through your normal teenage ages, worried about your grades. Worried about boys. Worried about high school popularity.

Then everything changed when the Kraang attacked. Suddenly, you find yourself being saved by four giant humanoid mutant turtles who do martial arts, and your dad is kidnapped by aliens in android bodies that wear suits, the mutants save you, but you have no idea if you'll ever see your father again. You might have just lost BOTH of your parents.

But before you are able to even start processing that you realize that one of those turtles has a massive, big, fat, and OBVIOUS crush on you. But does he confess? No, he just acts, really, really awkward and weird about it.

He lowkey treats you like his girlfriend even though he never asked you out, he calls you pet names like "my sweet chinchilla" and "my princess". He stalks you through buildings. He opens his arms expecting hugs when you're around. He pets your hair. He offers to let you feel his fucking bicep lmao.

And this isn't even half of the weird shit he does!!

Look, any teenage girl or actual woman would think this is fucking weird in real life, okay? Like, this guy is going to kill me and keep my teeth in a box levels of creepy. If we're treating April with actual respect, this would be lowkey terrifying from her POV, he saved her life and he likes her, what if she says she doesn't like him?

Donnie is taller, stronger, and much more skilled than April in every way possible— up until she gets superpowers— even though yes, he is a hero, and yes, his brothers would likely not let him do anything bad to her, how does she know?

If you're a regular teenage girl, how do you know this guy isn't going to lose his shit when you reject him? While I don’t think Cannon April is scared of Donnie hurting her for rejecting him, I still think she feels rejecting him would put her into such an awkward position that it could possible ruin the friendship they have.

Let's be honest, April is a cute/conventionally attractive girl, she definitely would have gone through the Nice Guy™ cannon event by the show's events at least once.

When you're able to look past the obvious bad writing or April hate what actually lies beneath is a girl who is in a horribly awkward situation. April's life has been turned upside down, her father keeps getting kidnapped or horribly mutated, she finds out she's not even FULLY human, aliens and ninjas are constantly trying to kidnap or murder her and on top of all of this?

One of the only people who can help her, help her father, save the entite world has a massive crush on her.

In her mind, it's much less risky to just pretend like she doesn't know he has a crush on her as long as he never confesses and she has to directly turn him down.

But then things get massively awkward when she meets this new kid and they have so much chemistry, she can actually share both aspects of her life with Casey. April gets to talk about how crazy her life is but also complain about normal stuff, and hey with this new kid coming around, this means that Donnie will naturally realize how they like each other and back off right???

Hahah...

No.

He gets JEALOUS. And is actively hostile to her friend!! And it is so blatantly obvious that it's because he is jealous of Casey, they're both generally so bad at hiding how they're both into April.

So now her predicament is that Donnie is actively hostile to Casey because he views him as a threat, and Casey who doesn't let that shit slide is responding in kin. They both act like she's their girlfriend or eventually going to end up with them, even though neither of them have asked her OUT.

This is majotarily an issue because of the bad writing. But if we ignore that for a second, what this looks like is a girl that's put into a situation where no matter what she does, she loses.

Now, I see some people suggesting that Donnie's crush on April is a two-sided problem, claiming that April is either very manipulative or that she lowkey enjoys that Donnie likes her which is odd to me— Like did we watch the same show?

While you can definitely see it like that since April's character is so badly written and so bland that you can fit almost any interpretation into her actions and her being outright manipulative would have been an interestingangle to explore, I completely disagree with this reading for the cannon because outside of a few very specific episodes, April never gives Donnie any indication that she likes him, outside of those situations she never "leads him on."

Like c'mon, the only episode I can think of where she does lead him on is foot too big, which I have a lot of problems with from a writing standpoint, but the episode itself feels so out of character and conflicting.

Ignoring how that episode affects Donatello for a second, it does something really gross to April's characterization. It has her very clearly reject Donnie's advances at the start of the episode, then she's not really present for a majority of the episode until Donnie essentially does some growing and tells her how he understands how she feels and he accepts her rejection, so she kisses him????

?????

Look, this feels like that point in any amateur writer's story where they need to continue the mutual pining, but the story came to a point where it has to directly address one of the character's interest in the other, so the writer pulls something convoluted out of their ass in order to keep the mutual pining going, without realizing that the way they're writing the character makes it feel like one of them HATES THE OTHER and by making them show interest out of a sudden, it destroys the previous characterization! It's not interesting, it's not even a character flaw, it's BAD WRITING!

This episode takes the cannon, if maybe unintentional characterization of April O'Neil as a girl who knows her friend is into her, but she feels uncomfortable directly addressing, and makes it seem like she's a manipulative bitch leading him on, which not only looks very stupid but is also very ~misogynistic~

It's also such a weird episode because nothing happens after this?

It's not Donnie's fault that he's a massive creep! It's not his Father's fault for not telling him he needs to cut it out because it's weirding April out— I also have a lot of problems with the way Splinter "addresses" this issue, which is to say, outside of a single episode, he doesn't—! It's not his brother's fault for never outright saying he needs to stop because of how much of a massive creep he is! It's not Casey's fault for not addressing it either and maybe trying to have a heart to heart with Donnie about both of their feelings toward April—

No, it's the girl's fault for leading him on. Even though everything she does screams "I am not interested, dude."

Also, this isn't me saying the other characters — with the exception of Splinter — should be heavily critized for their lack of emotional intelligence when approaching this situation. But if you are going to let the other teenager's poor actions slide because they're kids, you can't expect the only teenage girl to have the emotional intelligence to deal with that situation either without making it seem sexist, y'know.

The same issue is present with the way the writers start treating Casey btw, in season 2 when April was paired with Casey, she actually felt like a fully fledged character. It actually felt like she was going to start getting some actual character development and maybe develop a relationship with Casey, which made the most sense since at this point it felt like April had no intention of addressing the "I'm half human half kraang" situation. And she had chemistry with him!

And then out of nowhere she starts acting distant and cold towards Casey? Even CASEY points it out in the show lmao.

Honestly this feels like the writers trying to very poorly balance the love triangle, they needed to give Donnie a reason to believe he still had a chance with April, while knocking Casey down enough that he thought he shouldn't directly ask her out even after all of the pseudo dates they had in season 2.

And since I'm talking about April, I feel that maybe it's because my type of woman is women like Karai, which actually felt like an interesting person, even though she was also handled poorly, but April, outside of a few very specific episodes, just feels bland.

I mean, come on, can you tell me one concrete thing about her that comes from cannon that goes deeper than surface level?

What does she like? What doesn't she like? What her thoughts on the situations she finds herself in?

She never talks about her mother beyond missing her, even in the episode where the copy of her mom is present. It just happens, and then she never talks about it again??? At least not to any noticeable extent. She never processes what it means to be a half human half kraang mutant. It takes the show like 3 seasons to even start addressing her psychic powers?!

You're telling me you gave this version of April one of the coolest powers in the history of superpowers, and YOU WAIT TILL YOUR SHOW IS ALMOST OVER TO EVEN START ADDRESSING IT?

You cannot convince me Donnie and Casey wouldn't immediately want to talk about April's powers the moment they learned about it.

Donnie would immediately start running tests, not wait until the farmhouse to do it.

Casey would think, "It's totally dope. Yo" and would want to help April train her powers.

Cue a training montage with April learning how to levitate soda cans and how to use her psychic powers with both Donnie and Casey cheering her on.

Anyways, my conclusion to this post is just how all of the characters in this show were robbed, but especially April, she's not "April O'Neil" she is "Donnie's crush", she is "Casey's love interest", she’s "the center of the conspiracy".

She's never allowed to be a character. She's never allowed to feel like a real teenage girl. She's never even allowed to reject Donnie!! She is written as if she doesn't like him but every single time where he is getting over her suddenly something happens that makes him crawl back into that stupid obssession!! Even though she is clearly not interested. April O'neil is not a character, she is a weird plot device which the writers can use to move the plot forward and push their weird fucking ships onto the audience without actually developing anything to any extent.

I rest my case.

please do write an essay about wanderer one day i would love to read it <3

i love you. he is so <3 (essay under the cut because im crazy)

scara/wanderer/whatever you want to call him is so interesting to me because like. out of the train wreck that was inazuma, he managed to be one of the only well-written characters. and he wasn't even on the playable roster for that nation. incredible. why was inazuma so bad

in a way, his character actually functions to draw attention to a lot of the problems i personally have with the way ei/raiden and inazuma are written, namely that ei sucks and never sees a single consequence for her actions or even like. tries to fix her mistakes in any tangible way. Scaramouche was her prototype puppet, meant to be a test run for the eventual figurehead for inazuma which would run on unchangeable ideals while ei fucked off to her mind palace forever. he was not actually used for this purpose because ei saw him CRY and decided he wasn't fit to rule a country, and instead of like... idk doing anything RATIONAL with him she was just like ok. i'll let him sleep forever i guess. surely he will not wake up and resent me for this and turn evil. anyway. obviously he wakes up and realizes why mama ei abandoned him. he of course does not take this well. he internalizes the idea that his emotions made him weak and useless from. basically the moment of his conception. his emotional response is the reason he wass essentially abandoned by his mother. (to be fair, it's unclear if ei was aware that he retained consciousness, but still. throwing him out like trash because he had EMOTIONS was fucked up). this sets the stage for the way his mental state deteriorates over the course of the next couple hundred years.

so the poor kid has been abandoned by his mother for feeling things. bad start. but another important piece of this story is that, as per ei's original design for a puppet figurehead of inazuma, scara was essentially built to house her gnosis (essentially the heart of an archon.) since he never actually got used for that purpose, though, he feels as though he is missing a fundamental part of himself. as he wanders inazuma, he feels that lack of a heart harder and harder as he attempts to connect to humans and finds that he can't quite connect with them. (this is what i think of as his 'trying to be human' era) He struggles with the idea of mortality--specifically, a child that he befriends dies prematurely, and scara can't help but view it as a betrayal--"how could he break his promise and leave me behind?" he becomes acutely aware of the fact that he is not quite human and not quite god, but something in between--something that lacks the ability to feel like a human but was too emotional to fulfil its purpose as a god.

mortality and emotional response, to scara, become signs of weakness. he was discarded due to his emotionalness. his human friends' mortality took them from him. he grows to despise and reject both, which kickstarts his 'trying to be a god era,' which is how we've seen him in-game thus far. the thing is, he doesn't REALLY want to be a god. he wants to be loved. he wants validation and respect and family--everything that was taken away from him when ei threw him out, and when his human friends abandoned him. he tried it one way, tried playing pretend as a human, and only found more pain and suffering, so he decides to swing hard in the other direction, developing a superiority complex as a cover-up for his insane abandonment issues. No one can hurt a god. no one can abandon a god. no one can call a god weak. a god doesn't need friends or family or love because a god is all-powerful. he is convinced that if only he can attain true godhood--a gnosis, the item he was created to house, he will FINALLY be happy. and he decides that it doesn't matter how many people he has to hurt to do it.

(btw, throughout this entire time, ei has been in her mind palace being a deadbeat mom and deliberately ignoring the havoc her son is wreaking on the nation SHE IS SUPPOSED TO BE RUNNING. he even sends a message of introduction to the raiden shogun at some point ("tell her my name is kunikuzushi") which i can only assume was meant to make it back to ei and maybe get her to CARE A LITTLE BIT ABOUT THE KID SHE BROKE but she either never recieved it because the raiden shogun sucks equally as hard as she does or she heard it and didn't care. ughhhh.)

anyway. obviously this little insane attempt at attaining godhood does not end well for scara. i cant rewatch that sumeru archon quest cutscene without losing all brain function but you know what i mean. he fucks up. his hubris is his downfall. his attempt to bury his emotions and his humanity in order to ascend to godhood give him far too much confidence, and he loses the battle. nahida takes the gnosis and then fucking immediately gives it back to dottore because she sucks. scara's final attempt at finding some sort of place for himself in the world fails spectacularly and leaves him mentally and physically destroyed.

and in 3.3 he is going to wake up and keep going. and i am so so so so excited. i want to know how he heals. I want to see him reconcile with his humanity and his emotions AND with his origins in godhood, and i think having nahida and the traveler help him do that is gonna be so good if they do it right. i LOVE that they're allowing him to still retain a lot of that selfishness and smugness and attitude that makes him compelling as a villain, while ALSO seemingly letting him reconnect with his humanity and become better. i do still hope he gets to beat the shit out of ei tho

who's your favorite twisted wonderland character, and why?

How do I even choose?

I have different reasons for liking all of my favs

(I will expand on all of these if asked. Please ask. Please. Id analyze any character in twst if asked I love them all)

Ace: I love how blunt he is. He doesn't sugarcoat his feelings as he speaks up for himself, others, and what he thinks is right. He can be an idiot, but I love him nonetheless! Although I feel like canon doesn't do much with his character and he's just used as a way to make other characters have development. (Ex: Riddle in ch.1 deuce in ch.5 the fairy gala remix in his card story) But all in all I think I love him because he's the opposite of me. (I can't speak up for myself...)

Trey: Like Ace, canon doesn't do much with his character and fandom doesn't really do anything with him besides using him as a way for cater angst? (No hate to Cater stans of course) so a lot of his character is my speculation. (He is not a normal guy he is lying to himself.) I love how I can pick apart his character without canon coming in and crushing my dreams. (I project onto him frequently.)

Leona: Oh boy. Here we go. God I love Leona so much. Obviously, he's a depressed bitch and neither canon nor fandom properly recognizes it he also has some serious trauma. (knowing you could be better but, why try? Your goal is impossible anyways.) Also, (as far as I know) he's the only Overblot victim who didn't properly redeem himself. (Ripping up Azul's contracts out of selfish desires is not redemption.) So that's canon mischaracterizing their own character and the fandom, is the fandom. Overall Leona is mischaracterized way too much and I kin him. (That's the reason I love him. I kin him.)

Azul: Azul is literally my baby. I love him because I just wanna give him a hug. The way his ED is implied a few times and then never brought up again is really annoying to me like- if you're gonna give ED rep at least mention in more than his chapter! It's a key part of his character and it's barely there. Oh also he was bullied and I relate to that.

Jamil: The vibes. Gender Envy. The pyromania. The way he hates Kalim even though it's not his fault because he needs someone to be angry at and it's so easy to hate the person directly causing your problems rather than blaming the system behind them. Oh also he's brown and I'm brown so it's like-

Vil: VILLL MY BEAUTIFUL QUEEN. Gender. Envy. The things I could do if I was him- she's so- can you imagine if I was amab? I could be feminine and still not be seen as a girl. Anyways the way he's always second place but doesn't blame the person who's above him but rather blames himself is so sad but so me.

Idia: his gamer talk is so funny sometimes. Oh also I wish I had an older brother like him. Oh also I haven't finished ch.6 but I'm really excited. Oh also technological characters always have a special place in my heart. oh also he's depressed and I find that relatable.

Sebek: I love him. He's so loud and so rude (humans) but I love him he's such a dork. He's trying his best okay? Id really love to see his character when it's not revolving around Malleus though.

Authors Note: tldr: angst, badassery, gender envy, character studys and more not necessarily in that order.