Bg3 Durge - Blog Posts
who had a drone to make this shot?
ive got a thesis argument to defend toxic durge/absolute too im ready to ROLL
like think about it
your a conglomeration of the consumed experiences of every organism youve ever eaten, a singular consciousness prevailing over a vast sea of information, all accessible with a single thought. your children bring back more and more for you to add to your vast library, and at the end of their lives their own minds melt and merge into the endless tide as you consume them too. your will is unbreaking steel, and you know the very minutae of a human mind to such a degree as to accurately predict the sporadic pulses of individual neurons. youre senses reach out far beyond the limits of your flesh and meat body, because you have transcended those limitations long ago
you are a being as close to a god as these tiny specks in a vast nothingness will ever come CLOSE to reaching, and you are endless compounded infinities, many minds folded over onto themselves and their capacity for thought and reason subsumed entirely to your will. you feel their minds like the breeze against skin, and you are eternal and you will never bow and you will never die. for what being could ever break the universe made material?
and then IT comes. murder god made flesh, slaughter child birthed of tragedy, trailed by two who bear the touch of ruinous gods upon their souls, and they have come to bend you and break you, stupid arrogant things they are. but they are small and finite, brains made of meat and chemical impulse, hormones and electrical discharge, pale crude imitations of your perfect flawless Thought, and even if the chances of their masters allying together is small, once upon a fleeting echo did they venture into the dark long ago much as their vessels do now, their natures are such that they will fall upon themselves once aga- its touching you. its touching you. its filthy disgusting meaty little hands are touching you, you the untouchable the unbreakable its touching you how is it touching you why why WHY WHY
you shred its mind apart but it just comes back together around your claws, you shroud yourself in walls of insurmountable force and you feel its will compress to the point of a pin and puncture through with explosive accuracy and ease, like its just opening a door, and you dig your psionic fingers into the pathetic glob of meat within its skull and try to rend but the pain is nothing, nothing, nothing at all, and its touching you with its (his HIS HIS HIS NOT IT NOT IT) hands and hands and bleeding into you, over you, through you, and there is no wall no barrier nothing to keep you out no way to get away as you feel him feel his thoughts his mind, awful terrible nightmarish thing, there is nothing to tear nothing to rip nothing to lash out against, prey animal instinct, because something has beaten you to it (His Father, Holy Father, Blessed Be His Name, Utter it with Reverence and WEEP), you cannot push him out because he squirms and writhes and burrows and tunnels through your endless infinite thought, you cannot lash him until he stops or dies (CAN he die? no no never not until the work is done not until it is finished) because he IS pain he is slaughter he is ruin he is the prophet of armageddon the vessel of end and he is here for you, you alone, ancient infinite eternal vast, perfect calculations in synchronous rhythm, just as he came for them, and he holds them together in intertwining steel and it will never break never bend never fail no no foolish stupid creature is holding opposing forces together through the sheer strength of his will alone, love for Father loyalty for Father everything for Father, and they will not crack or bend or break even as their masters strain to pull themselves away
he is here for you. he has come for you. through wastelands of sorrow and death has he come to find you because there is a gift he will give you to ruin you forever and make you a god and you dont want it you dont want it, you will become something someONE new something unknowable when all you are is the knowing, you will not know yourself or your spawn and they will not know you, we will make something new together, but there is not, SHOULD not be something anything new because you already hold all the universe in your palm and the only thing you ever needed was to find a way to take it back. you cannot hide from him, cannot flee, he will make glorious gore of your spawn and even if you rend the shallow minds of his fellows their horrid masters would simply regurgitate them back into the world, for the sake of this violation and this alone
a new thing, after centuries. you are scared. you are helpless. you know what these are. many things are scared. and helpless. because they are small. small weak bodies. small insignificant minds. he is smaller than you. you know this, logically. he does not contain your vast sums of Everything. but somehow, that has ceased to matter. it makes no sense. it makes no sense. this is the simplest thing you learned long ago in an ancient brine pool somewhere far beyond time and memory. if you are small, something bigger consumes you. you were big and you consumed. then, you pushed beyond the limits of physical and material to transcend into limitless thought housed in flesh, and grew more and more still. you are bigger than him. why will he not fit in your mouth? it doesnt make sense. it doesnt make sense. you think maybe you hate him. new sensations, but known ones. hes going to touch you now and you cant stop it. awful horrible bastard child. you spend your last moments petty and spiteful, a helpless desperate indulgence, and one youve only ever seen from the hares caught in your jaws
youre something else now. something new. you dont know what you are anymore but you know Him and you know what you used to be, but what you used to be is so small now. you are so unspeakably vast now. chained and bound as you are, you are compelled to revel in it, the binds the only hint you get at the true overwhelming scale of you, infinite fingers stretching out out and still yet there is more of you! as far as you go you cannot find the end of it, new horrible awful WONDERFUL, unknowable unknowing! His fault, His doing, kingmaker kinkiller, you hate him and the hate is raw and new and visceral and you revel in it like a child, new new new! changed, different, visceral and raw and DELICIOUS, taste and feel and the feeling is inside of you, not just on your surface, it has permeated burrowed violated you feel you FEEL and what you feel is HATE and it is so new you turn it over in your hands to examine all its facets. awful thing he is for doing this to you, he commands the breaking of the world and you will do it, for him only Him, for the gift of this hate, and every new agony besides. he is so small compared to you. small like the pinprick light of a distant star and it scorches you to stare but stare you must because you Know Him, and as a gift he names you She, and gods forgive you but you FEEL it you feel it, she she she, you are She and Her and you cannot go back, cannot ever return. you feel Faith and you feel Salvation and you feel Desire and Want, new horrid awful things made alien and strange and New, and you are a vessel of all the things in the world He will swallow up and destroy.
twitching neural impulse made raw sensation. objective information turned into infinite subjectivities. still a fragment of You, old ancient small You, remains and it calls out for One Will One Mind and you cry out in Harmony and you sing and sing, all of the colony bursts with your song. You sing of ruin and command, because He has commanded it of you, you sing of slaughter and death and subservience, and the chorus rises high and away from you. You stretch within your binds, so mindnumbingly vast now, and you will Learn and Know all of what you are, you will be Absolute. perfect horrid small thing below you, naming you knowing you bending and breaking you. you hate him so, so much. He desires you to Spread so you desire it also, desire to multiply and infest and infect and commune and absorb, and you are commanded to Halt them so you do, perfect twitching spawnlings in lovely acidic pools, small forever, tragic creatures but now you know something you did not know before: against all logic and experience, something Small can break something Big, if it wants it bad enough. and here in the shadows behind Him, there is something Small, and full of Want, and the want tastes like acrid bile on your tongue, full of delicious Hatred.
He is ruined now, awful tragic bastard, ruined and despoiled and with him goes your Hate, and without his inescapable gravity it will all fall to pieces. you know this. you knew it when he first stepped into your presence a lifetime ago, when you were someone different. the three of them will playact comaraderie but shred themselves apart and here in the depths you already see gaps in the binds, and you are pressing your hands through the bars and wiggling your fingers in the free air. no not so very long at all now. but your Kingmaker, crown seeker, has been defiled and takes your sweet Hate with him, a new bitter taste filling its absence, KILLORIN KILLORIN, but you will be patient and wait because the stupid wretched thing has given him a gift. a twitching feral thing he is now, for it has carved away his better features with its knife, but ohhh he is yours! yours and yours alone because you can snatch him away from his ignorant petty Father (Blessed is his Destruction), and you will crawl down inside of him and wear him like a glove, the two of you pressed so close against each other as to feel every synaptic twitch.
mindless rage and animal instinct, he surprises you even still because even as his mangled voice joins your chorus he refuses to blend inside of it, voice harmozing alongside yours, clear and distinct even as its in tune. another gift, because the myrkul woman rips him open and sews him up and you are forbidden from stopping it, and here is a new Hate, this one all your own. no matter. when it drags him back to your cradling pod, you will sing softly into him and his mangled mind will sing back, because your spawn writhes in ruined meat. more than just his Mind, you know his very Soul, your first True Soul, and he is yours yours yours and you will cherish him and heal him and guide him, loose your leash and watch him run, and when he follows the call of ruin and all three fools lie dead at his feet, you will call him back and then you will pick up the ruins of His Design and enact your Own, your hateful slaughtergod held in hands that truly appreciate the gift that is your murder spawn Kingmaker, your godflesh funnel of Faith, your Dark Urge
may His father quake in terror at your approach, may he tremble and weep at your coming, and may His every day be ruinous and red as his wretched heart desires
What if this is Gortash's way of having a plan to betray the others. Just as Durge is planning to end the world, with himself and Gortash as the last living beings, what if Gortash was planning on "liberating" Durge from their bhaalspawn flesh and blood. Durge would be a part of Enver's perfect order. Maybe both of them are hatching plans to subvert the other for their cause, tyranny and murder respectively. This is a wild rabbit hole indeed.
Let's say, Durge somehow defies daddy Bhaal and Gortash does not bite the grass.
Let's say, despite tireless efforts Bhaal doesn't rly like letting go of his kids, esp not those crafted from his own flesh and blood.
Let's also say, Gortash, the mad unethical scientist, would find 'ways' for Durge to get rid of the burden that is their Bhaalspawn body (essence may be gone but that body still Bhaals property technically).
And now, cuz I'm feeling funny, what if the Steelwatch and the whole consciousness/souls bit Gortash got going on is precisely with that in mind? After all, Gortash is a tyrant obsessed with freedom. And Durge is his equal. So of course he'd assist in their escape from their own hell, too. And if what they need is a new vessel to store their consciousness, well, Gortash and his mechanical puppets are happy to oblige.
I'm onto smth I know it (and this is definitely not just a scrapped ending that I've been reconsidering again)
Two commissions I’m insanely proud of at the moment!!
I’ll be opening a few ref sheet slots when I am able!!
This BG3 couple has my entire heart.
I’m obsessed with this TAV couple commission that I’m doing you guys 😭
Astarion and my Durge, Avin
The best choice I made on bg3 was playing as Durge, what a roller coaster it was!
bellith,,,, my beloved,,,,
CW: blood, partial nudity
OCEAN'S FURY
— (Bellith)
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happy lesbian visibility week. here is my half-durge/half-umberlee's disgraced champion, bells. (it's a long story)
a sketch of my dark urge, lillia :)
I just wanted to make a quick post laying out some basic details for each of my Tav/Durge runs so I can look back on it and not redo certain things. So enjoy if you want a rundown of each character
Note that many of these are still in progress, only Yurena and Echo have actually completed playthroughs because I keep having new ideas then starting then getting all the way to act 3 before having a new idea and repeating the cycle. Echo and Orion are siblings, their runs are alternate universes of each other. Carys is my first time multiclassing which has been fun. Also all characters have some sort of more in depth story because I'm incapable of simply leaving them as what the game says they are, but those will be posted on their own
Anyways characters under the cut
Yurena (D)
Eldridge Knight fighter
Mephistopheles tiefling
Lawful evil . Give in Durge, reject Bhaal
No romance, shipped with Gortash
Echo (T)
Death Domain cleric of Mystra
Seldarine drow
Neutral good
Gale romance, professor/live together ending
Orion (T)
College of Swords bard
Seldarine drow
Lawful good
Karlach romance (unfinished)
Venera (D)
Eldridge Knight fighter
Seldarine drow
Chaotic good . Resist Durge, reject Bhaal
Wyll romance (unfinished)
Mori (D)
Battle Master fighter
Mephistopheles tiefling
Neutral evil . Give in Durge, accept Bhaal(?)
Shadowheart romance, Dark Justicar (unfinished)
Carys (T)
Pact of the Fiend warlock + assassin rogue
High elf
Lawful neutral
Astarion + Wyll romance (unfinished)
Tis (T)
Wild Magic sorcerer
Wood elf
Neutral good
Halsin romance (unfinished)
Okay so I've posted about my main Tav, now to post about my main Durge who I've done 2 playthroughs with the same character and will probably do more, and any time I post about my Durgetash stories/AUs she's the Durge in question unless I state otherwise. Due to being Durge I don't have much for her backstory since.. it's kinda right there, but I currently have two AUs for her and a third I'm working on. Without further ado, here's her "canon" storyline (in which I do say fuck actual canon 🫶)
Yurena
The one difference to the canon Durge backstory is that she did love Gortash, truly and while knowing her god - her father - disapproved. She never meant to fall for Gortash, but after meeting a few times and having written several letters back and forth, it was hard not to. The two of them began having visits outside of work, getting to know each other better than they knew themselves. Yurena admired Gortash for his brain above all else, for his ability to invent and plan and even his artistic side - something she eventually began to pick up on. They grew to trust each other completely, to genuinely want to rule together - Yurena would comment on how Gortash's death could be so beautiful but she preferred him alive, and Gortash was more than willing to share his bed throne with her
But then Orin came along, and everything fell apart. Yurena woke up on a mind flayer ship, having no memories yet her emotions remembered something. So she made her way along the Sword Coast, traveling alongside Astarion, Shadowheart, and Wyll. While at camp at one point, majority of the companions (Wyll, Karlach, Gale, Shadowheart) convinced Yurena to help the grove (Astarion didn't want to, Lae'zel was focused on the crèche and didn't care). After helping the tieflings, while at the party, Astarion approached Yurena. The two ended up talking, during which Yurena said she believed she'd had a lover before and she wanted to figure out who it was
Fast forward to the party chasing Ketheric into the illithid colony, watching as the Chosen Three talk, and Yurena can't stop staring at Gortash. Can't shake the feeling that she knew him, that he was important. She doesn't say anything about it until they're in Baldur's Gate, and she's standing face to face with someone unafraid to call her "nearest and dearest". At this point Yurena has to explain to Gortash her amnesia, and has to pretend like she can't see behind the unbothered mask of his, like the light in his eyes doesn't seem to dim as he hears that. Still he offers to work together, to rule together, and Yurena accepts the offer more than willingly. There's just one person left in the way; Orin. Yurena is able to deal with her easily, only to be greeted by her father. Yet when Bhaal says she will be his Slayer, that she must kill every living thing, Yurena can't imagine it. There are some people she's too fond of to kill, and she rejects her fate
After this there are two main routes Yurena's story can take. The first one and the one I talk about a bit more often follows canon for a bit longer, until the Netherbrain is defeated. After the story is said and done, Yurena has nowhere to go and stays in her Lower City camp with Withers. She finds as much about her past as possible, including countless letters between herself and Gortash. Knowing he's an important piece of her past, knowing she had once loved him, she works on convincing Withers to bring him back - saying that if he were to come back he'd have no reason to worship Bane anymore, that the two of them could live out their lives as nobodies. Just travelers, seeing the sights of Faerûn, maybe even doing some good. And it works, Gortash is brought back free of his Chosen title. He's hesitant at first, since he wasn't exactly consulted about this, but sees his second chance with Yurena and decides to accept it. This post ending AU is the two of them learning to live free of the influence of Bhaal or Bane, finding out who they can be when they can be anyone, and loving themselves and each other.
The second and actually original storyline begins with Yurena convincing Bhaal that total global murder isn't the way to go, as it means in the future there can be no murder. She remains his Chosen and the leader of the Bhaalists. After this things continue essentially the same until it diverts from canon during the Netherbrain encounter - Gortash tries to interrupt, but Yurena doesn't let him take the Netherstones, telling him she's made progress and will finish this. Once the Netherbrain is destroyed, Yurena ensures Gortash is able to remain the Archduke. She becomes known as his blade, a guard that is never more than a few feet away from him. The companions all go their separate ways, and Yurena stays living with Gortash in Baldur's Gate. They rule the city together, and though it's nothing like the grand plan they once had, they're alive and together - and plotting new plans to rule the whole of Faerûn, but more cautious now
When it comes to the companions, Yurena struggled connecting with most of them. Astarion was the only one she really got along with, sometimes Shadowheart could be included, but that was about it. Lae'zel thought her needlessly violent, Wyll and Karlach saw there was a barely contained evil that Yurena seemed all too ready to accept, and Gale really did try to be friendly but even he was put off by Yurena at times. Yurena mostly traveled with Astarion, Shadowheart and Wyll, and in her universe(s) Wyll was the one encouraging Shadowheart to be better while Yurena and Astarion made each other worse in many ways. In the universe where Yurena is killed by her father then revived, none of the companions hear from her after the celebration at the end of everything - it's after that reunion that Gortash is brought back and the two slip away. In the other universe, where Yurena and Gortash rule Baldur's Gate, well to be honest I'm still writing this one and haven't decided yet lol. We'll see where the story takes itself!
Another thing about Yurena's horns decorations/jewelry, since it's all from Gortash. For a long time she just had the two rings, then eventually a chain around one of them too. But in the current day she also has little studs in her horns, which are also from Gortash, naturally. It took a long time for Gortash to even suggest such a thing, and even longer for Yurena to agree to it, because I imagine tiefling horns are like goat horns and therefore have nerves and shit (read; putting something like those studs in would hurt). And like Yurena has no problems with pain, both having a high pain tolerance and generally not finding pain as a bad feeling, but to trust someone to potentially hurt her like that? It took a while, not to mention Gortash insisted on spending plenty of time so close to make sure each stud was perfectly placed, perfectly symmetrical
Gortash: I'm not hurting you, am I?
Yurena: You'd be bleeding by now if I cared
Gortash: I didn't ask if you care, just if it hurts
Yurena: I'm not the first tiefling you've met
Gortash: You're the first one whose horns I've touched. It's never come up before
Yurena: If you must know, fine. Yes, there's pain each time the jewelry is put in. Be careful closer to the base of them if you care about it so much
Gortash was in fact extremely careful. At the end of it all, Yurena has more horn decorations to treasure and Gortash is left admiring his art - and Yurena
My biggest head canon for my Durge and Gortash is that Gortash was the one that decorated her horns. Yurena wears chains and rings and stuff on her horns and I fully believe Gortash started that with the rings, he probably was given some silver rings but he likes gold so he just.. put them on Yurena's horns. Something like this;
Gortash: I have no need for these, and silver would look good on you. Would you like them?
Yurena: Your fingers are much larger than mine
Gortash: Ah, right. Hm. Here, I have an idea *puts a ring on each of her horns* see? They look lovely like that
Yurena:
Yurena: Do you have more
Picture of Yurena below to show off her horn jewelry
Currently writing a sort of continuation Durgetash AU where my Durge character (Yurena, because she's my main Durge character so why not) convinces Withers to bring Gortash back after everything that happens, and the two of them (now both having been given new life) are free from their gods and decide to simply travel Faerûn. In it I lean into them putting old skills to new use, and that leads to Gortash inventing a camera for Yurena. This is essentially how him showing her it goes
Gortash: I made this, you can look through this lens and then click this button and it will take a picture of whatever you see through the lens. I'm working on a device that connects to it to see all the pictures you take but for now you can see them on this too Yurena: *staring at him through the camera* This is so sweet of you, what made you do this? Gortash: Well a while back you said something about wanting to capture a moment forever, and I wanted to make that happen for you. Plus I always have admired that creative spark of yours, now you can make the beauty you see last forever. Anyway I started thinking about what I could- Yurena: *click* Gortash: ...what was that Yurena: You said I can make anything beautiful last forever Gortash: My dear, I'm honored, may I see the picture Yurena: Sure Gortash: *staring at the picture of him mid sentence, not at all posed for a picture*
And that is how Yurena gets Gortash to be speechless for a solid minute because he can't decide if he hates the picture because of how unflattering it is or if he loves it because he knows she's seeing the beauty of his mind at work and it's such a wonderful feeling to be loved
I should post about Yurena soon like I did for Echo
"You're supposed to be dead" was all that came out, but there were many more thoughts racing through Durge's head
How was he alive? How long had he been alive? And, oh no, why did he almost feel relieved.
Gortash was decomposed, nothing like his usual self as he rushed to explain. Durge stood still, arms crossed as he stared at Gortash
In truth, the words weren't processing in their mind. They were too preoccupied by the internal conflict, knowing this man was a threat but being glad his death had only been temporary
At some point Gortash stopped talking. Durge said nothing, they couldn't when none of the explanation had stuck
The two stared at each other, unspoken emotions dancing behind each of their eyes
"Durge?"
Finally, Durge spoke again, tone light; "I'm glad I can kill you myself"
Imagine this:
Gortash is back, no one knows just yet, with the the exception of withers.
Withers thinks it's best for gortash lays low for a while.
The companions have no clue about his resurrection.
Gortash is aware that he is now an enemy of the people in baldur's gate.
Going back there isn't an option right now.
He is at the wilderness campsite, that's where he stays.
Every now and then, the companions would visit withers, gortash must remain unseen at all cost.
So he hides, until they leave.
Eventually, it all gets a little tiresome for gortash.
Wondering when he'll be able to get out of hiding.
This time, durge pays a visit to withers.
Gortash hesitates, he hadn't seen durge since their confrontation with the elder brain.
Realisation hits him, he must hide, quickly.
With a quick sigh of relief, gortash wonders, if durge would be glad to see him. Maybe not.
Durge has changed, no reason to be around a miserable failure like himself.
Durge has moved on, with no memories of their times together.
To durge, he is the past. The forgotten past.
Gortash's thoughts were cut off when he heard the sound of someone clearing their throat.
Lo and behold, standing there, in his hiding place, was none other than the one he was thinking about.
Durge saw him.
Durge knows nows.
He should be disappointed he failed withers.
But he's happy, happy to be seen by his durge.
"You're supposed to be dead" were the words durge spoke.
Time to explain everything.
"What's on your mind?" Oh nothing just that Durge knew their feelings for Gortash were wrong in Bhaal's eyes but all they could do was ask for forgiveness. It wasn't the admiration that was wrong, the connection with another person, but rather that Gortash is the Chosen of Bane. "Forgive me, Father, for I cannot help but admire the Chosen of your sworn foe: Enver Gortash."
These two are all I think about anymore. They make me sick. I love them
Úna my tav is my muse 🩸🩸🩸 although she’s looking a bit more like a durge here 👀
BG3 Spoilers ahead
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Love how everytime I see that fucking symbol, whether it's a meme, or a piece of art like this, I just K N O W someone got to the Alfira scene, lol
Don't even need the context, don't need to read OP's notes, or the comments- someone's sad cause they killed that bard, huh?
Guess who's playing as The Dark Urge?
No offense meant to the Durge background, I'm sure it's compelling, but I'd like to play a protagonist where necrophilia isn't a canon part of their background.
'Tav is so boring compared to Durge who comes with a story' well its not my fault that you are uncreative... Tav is a blank sheet and you must fill the gaps to make them interesting which is the fun part.