And I Remember Being Outraged That They Showed It On Tv - Blog Posts

very complicated Friends tv show when I was super young then my other family came into my kife and made me suffer with internalized homophobia and biphobia Before them (from what I can remmeber) I was indifferent to lgbtq people like before them I rmember hearing about a trans woman coming out then I suffered after my other family left me I remember the loud house when i was in middle school it had a bi character who asked a girl out and I remember being outraged that they showed it on tv despite being like 12 or something I dont remember exactly how I unlearned it in fact Im still struggling with my sexuality someone taught me homophobia but I dont remember who The first irl example was my moms aunties who had adopted children recently qnd my family was okay with it then I remember seeing two girls kissing in the bathroom and being confused but then my sister came out and I was fine with it but my mom told her it was just a phase then I started questioning myself because I didnt really know that I was allowed to be anything other than straight my sister told me that my mom and grandma said she was gonna go to hell we have a complicated relationship to my mom and grandma she still acts lovingly and I think my grandma may have changed but theres still tension there my own mom doesnt want us to be anything but cis and straight shes fune with lgbt as long as it isnt her own kids just a very complicated journey of unlearning hate I guess 🙃 basically my family has this its fine as long as its not my kids attitude still struggling to this day with my sexuality I just know Im not straight unlearning self hatred and stuff was always presented as a linear journey but for me it was more of squiggly line?