No Worries! Again, I Absolutely Don't Think You Meant Anything Negative By It, Bad Wording Happens C:

man I just be talking about things and stuff 🐶

Coming from a middle eastern genderqueer, imo the whole thing is less 'transwomen calling TMEs theyfabs is like black people calling white people crackers' and a lot more 'transwomen calling TMEs theyfabs is like black people calling middle easterns camel fuckers.' (Obligatory these groups aren't exclusive, you can come from the middle east and be black or be mixed middle eastern and black.)

Like. Sure there's a lot of stuff about black people that the vast majority of middle easterns do not and will not understand. Sure there is a lot of anti black sentiments held by many middle easterns. Sure you can go ahead and say that this slur does not have the history or gravity of the n-slur, so it's not the same. You can even argue that because colorism affects your average black person far more than your average middle eastern, that the racism they face is simply a lesser version of the racism black people face.

But here's the thing.

Even if all of that is true, it does not justify calling me a camel fucker. You are still being fucking racist when you call me a camel fucker! You are being racist! Towards another racial group that also deeply suffers under the same systems that make black people suffer! I understand the frustration towards racist middle easterns but that does not make it okay! Some rhetoric that hurts them may not hurt me and vice versa, but we are still both suffering from a racist society, and there's also a lot of overlap in our experiences when we focus less on generalisations and more on specific instances! Yes it's important to address anti black sentiments within the general middle eastern population, I am all for that and I think it's important, and it's part of why I hate when people focus on white people and not nonblack people when it comes to talking about anti black sentiments BC that is NOT exclusively a white people thing.

But quite frankly if you are calling me a camel fucker and telling me to shut up about my own issues because you think you've got it worse and then claim if I'm upset about being called a camel fucker it just proves I'm racist, or if you say it's okay to call me a camel fucker because you've had a lot of bad experiences with middle easterns and I gotta prove I'm 'one of the good ones' by nodding my head and smiling, then I'm sorry, but you are the racist in that scenario, and I am not shutting up. I am still going to defend black people with my whole heart but holy shit you are being racist and I do not have to take that sort of verbal abuse. Thank god this isn't an actual thing that has happened (the justification for being called a camel fucker, I have been called a camel fucker by black people).

Except even then this analogy is flawed because I think trans people of all slices have WAY more in common with their experiences than black people and middle easterns AND I think the trans community does a lot more to try and understand each other than middle easterns and black people try to understand each other. But it sure as fuck is more accurate than comparing it to black people calling white people crackers.

(Sorry if any of this is worded weird, I am on mobile and not used to it)

The issue is that they're barely willing to agree AFAB trans people have any problems literally at all and what they do admit is "I guess sometimes TERFs care about them too much and out of overwhelming but misguided love occasionally do things that inconvenience them".

Got this when i asked what transemasculation was.

Why the fuck are they making terms for oppression against trans masculine people in spaces that we arent in? We should get to decide on our own vocabulary. That just feels straight up rude.

The discrimination we face is actually kind of rooted in us being men. And i really wish people would stop trying to tell transmen/transmasculine people about the roots of our own oppression. We know it better than you do. And there is so much more to the oppression that we face and theres more causes than just "doing man wrong".

If you hate trans men, I hope every woman you look up to in your life transitions into the happiest, hairiest, fattest trans men ever.

On statements like “kill all men”…

I remember once while I was still taking college classes, the professor (a cis man who liked having open discussions, teaching a very small class that was mostly cis women with I think one cis man and me, the openly trans man) decided to ask us a question that was definitely not an original idea but the point was to see what we’d say.

If we found a way to reproduce without sperm and decided to sterilize all people with penises and testicles and let them slowly die out to form an all-woman society, what would we lose?

Now, if you’re like me, you’re probably going to lose sight of the actual point of the question itself and get lost in the flaws built into it. If you’re not like me and you’re capable of disregarding the problems inherent within the question and engaging with it as intended, I’m going to ask you to not do that because that isn’t really the point of me sharing this story.

Probably much to the professor’s annoyance, I could not resist my urge to call attention to what I saw as glaring issues with this premise. I also, naively I guess, felt the ethical concerns of wiping out an entire group of people was obvious. So the first thing I said was

“This wouldn’t even actually wipe out all men, since trans men would still exist.”

Yes, there’s more issues. I didn’t get to say them all. This was the one I managed to get out and I wasn’t willing to cause a scene over this. I, definitely naively, thought that since I was the one trans person in the group, there would be some awareness that I had experienced and perspectives that the others hadn’t heard and they would be willing to listen. A cis woman was very quick to dispel that thought:

“No, they wouldn’t cause there would be no point [to being a trans man].”

And if that doesn’t say a metric fuck ton about how cis people view trans men, then the way absolutely nobody but me was willing to argue with her on this and the fact that cis people since then, especially cis women, have found ways to communicate the same sentiment in various other ways over and over again certainly fucking does. And it’s the blatant refusal to acknowledge how trans men are seen as “women trying to be men because misogyny/patriarchy” and not as actual trans people or as actual men (with us sometimes fitting into one category but not the other depending on who’s talking and what’s convenient for them in the moment) because the very people writing about trans men as non-trans-men are thinking of us in exactly the same way as well that leaves me finding every single thing talking about trans men that wasn’t written by a trans man as deeply lacking and ignorant of the realities of being trans men.

It’s been years since that day. I’m still frustrated. Not just by that moment alone but by how often it’s never directly said, heavily implied exactly once, but still made clear repeatedly in every other way that I’m not viewed as actually trans by some, not viewed as actually a man by others, not viewed as actually either by most, and at no point am I allowed to argue against it without someone, especially cis women, being quick to shoot me down with their willfully ignorant idea of a correction.

Now, this post was supposed to be about statements like “kill all men”.

“Kill all men - not you, though!” Yes, because you think I’m a woman playing dress up to escape misogyny and in your female supremacist fantasy utopia I’ll just detransition. After all, there’s no longer a point to all this that you can see. Can’t be that I have an internal sense of identity that happens to be best described as manhood and that being forced to be a woman is effectively erasing my actual identity in favor of some version of me you happen to like the idea of better, thinking I could ever be that when that version of me is nothing more than an idea and not actually me.

“Kill all men - including trans men cause I’m inclusive!” I guess KAM is technically shorter than “get back in the closet”. Because that’s the impact this has. You’re telling trans men to stay in the closet or get back in there if they’ve left. You’ve established that it’s not safe to be trans around you. As if it’s safe for any trans person to be anywhere. Look, we can agree that a trans man in the early stages of transitioning can, for short periods of time, pretend to be a girl for survival, and we can agree that a passing stealth trans man will likely be treated like a cis man as long as he stays stealth, but 1) this is not evidence of trans male privilege and you are a clown for thinking “having to closet yourself for safety” is anything other than proof of oppression, 2) trans men do not just look like butch cis women until their first T injection and then suddenly a beard shoots out of his face and his muscles instantly double in size, there is an in between point where you cannot pass as a cis woman or a cis man. There is no safety in being a trans man. Statements like KAM are going to impact us differently because in saying this you’ve made it clear that even in trans friendly spaces we’re not safe or welcome. We can either be trans and born-female but not real men and therefore okay or we can be men and gender traitors who know nothing about the magic sisterhood shared by all womyn and must be eradicated with all the cis men (ooh, maybe start with the trans men so we can give any lost egg trans sisters time to come out - we know trans men are men, but some of these “cis men” might not be!). The fact that you decided trans women are women and trans men are men (but not actually trans like trans women are) doesn’t make this better. It’s even worse if you’re not trans yourself and pulling this, cause you’re putting on a masquerade of acceptance and using it for violence, which I’m sure you won’t hesitate to wield against any trans women or possible-trans-men who step out of line.

And no, I don’t care that in this moment you’re not literally killing us. Cis women with these beliefs can use what social power they have over trans people as a whole to their advantage and take their man trauma out on us as they please and we have to walk on eggshells and expect nothing from them in response. We may not be dead but we’re sure as hell not being treated well.

“It’s just a joke, we’re just venting! Calm down!” There’s a time and a place for this, you know. A cis woman who just got sexually harassed by an older man and angrily telling her friend “I wish men would just die” is not really my enemy here. A trans man venting about an experience with a cis man being creepy, rude, transphobic, or all three is not a good time to say “men are gross and should die”. You’re using KAM jokes to distance yourself from your cis status (cis women are also guilty of being creepy, rude, and transphobic to trans people, including trans men) while also establishing the literal victim of a cis man’s behavior as being equal to the cis man in terms of how bad they are. You can put “kill all men” on your blog and say it’s a joke but if I put “die cis scum” or “I’m a cismisogynist” on my blog as a joke about the negative experiences I’ve had with cis people but especially cis women*, I know some of you will be up in arms about that.

* (keep in mind it’s not just casually transphobic comments, it was a cis woman who sexually assaulted me, it was a cis woman who manipulated me into a toxic relationship, it was a cis woman who outed me as trans at work by screaming about my genitals the second I told her I wasn’t planning on ever getting pregnant cause I’m a man and I’m not comfortable with the idea of getting pregnant, and there’s been too many cis women who see nothing wrong with weighing in on trans issues just to show how much they hate trans men because we’re men… or did they mean gender traitors)

People who say that trans people need to learn 'basic biology' are usually uneducated and relying on simplified and unnuanced definitions which they use as catchphrases. 'Men have xy, women have xx, its just common sense'

People who say trans men need to learn 'basic feminism' are usually uneducated and relying on simplified and unnuanced definitions which they use as catchphrases. 'Men are privileged oppressor, women are oppressed, its just common sense'

Ive so many people tell me im a rapist for being a lesbian Ive been called a predator and a danger to both gay men and lesbians I have been called a pedo and an abuser for my kinks and fetishes Ive been told to kill myself because of my kinks and my identity all of these done by people who knew that I am not a trans woman not one of these people thought I was amab but yeah you're right those tme people don't understand what its like to be called out and ostracized and verbally abused for no reason they have no idea what that's like to be demonized for being trans they have no idea what its like to have people abuse them for having kinks other people don't like Youre so right the tmes can just do whatever they want no one is ever mean to them about sex and their sexual preferences you're so right

man, the transcourse out there is getting real exhausting. yes, transmisogyny is real. but also yes, transandrophobia is real. everyone go to bed.

In 2021, my country debated on a law to open medically assisted procreation to women couples and single mothers. When it was debated we asked for it to broaden the conditions to include trans men and transmascs since the only mention of women excluded whose who had changed their gender markers.

We were consistently told by cis and trans women alike to stop making reproductive rights about men, that it was their fight.

The law passed. And we celebrated, and they celebrated, and we held back tears, we'd never be fathers.

In 2024, my country debated on putting abortion in the constitution.

The minister of families received 2 renowned TERFs and tried to change the law go forbid professionnals to refuse an abortion to "women", so trans men whose gender markers were changed could be denied. And we fought, and we fought for the definition to be changed and we won, and we celebrated in

Deafening silence.

“If men could be pregnant it’d be in the constitution already !”

If only you knew.

After I got assaulted, I wanted to take a self defense lesson.

They were “cis and trans women only”, because a man like me shouldn't know how to hit. I went to the gym and I punched a dummy until my knuckles turned purple.

I got a sleep exam. Under anesthesia, the doctor asked me if he should say “sir or ma’am”. I’m tied up on the bed. I asked him to say “sir”. He tells me “I guessed so, you’re such a pretty boy” and he stroke my arm. I want to scream and cry. When I recall the scene to people I'm stealth with, they say I just dreamed, he wouldn't do that, I'm a man. I'm a hysterical woman with extra steps.

I catter to my wounds alone and I wonder

If I got to the point of being hatecrimed

If people would argue on my grave

For it to be called

A feminicide.

no one cares what a cuntb*y who believes in transandrophobia/misandry has to say unless it's in a s****** note

you kazoo voiced rats have said enough don't you think?

stool kick yourself

babes you are proving my point.

everyone point and laugh at the transphobe