Acquired: Ability To Read Smut With A Blank Expression

it’s so cute when men are extra goofy n dumb but when they wanna fuck you they get mean and serious

Pet Peeve: My Dad

Pet peeve: People who yelled at you and made you angry but try to joke with you a few minutes later because they can’t stand the atmosphere they created

If you have a crush on me congrats on the good taste but also my condolences for your awful taste

it's me i'm girls

Oh, Dracula

Johnathan Harker: Oh my God, I am a prisoner in this wretched castle! Nothing but prey for that bewildering Dracula fellow! There is no hope for me but to pray I arise no suspicion in Dracula so I may delay the inevitable.

Dracula, washing Johnathan’s dishes: This is going great. I’m gonna get a good grade in being human, which is both normal to want and possible to achieve.

so at a used book store a couple months back i found an annotated copy of dracula, and now that dracula daily is a thing, i’ve finally gotten around to reading it.

they have the fuckign. chicken paprika recipe that knocked out our boy johnny.

now you too can upset your mild-mannered stomach so badly that you have fever dreams of a sexy haunted castle

Art Prints

Ivy Alive on Etsy

Hello skinny tgirl. Lately you've been complaining that your tits aren't growing. In front of you is a plate of food.

Look at her eyes 💛🐝💛🐝💛🐝

i go through life screaming WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT??? at every small creature like dan playing pokemon firered