— strangers (soulmates) part 1
pairing: erwin smith x f!reader
summary: erwin smith was the embodiment of intimation, money, and power. and you were his personal assistant.
genre: office au; smut, angst
word count: 2.1k
warnings/notes: swearing, no real warnings for this part; purely self-indulgent bc i just watched aot for the first time and i love him so bad
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Byron in Venice, Ivan Aivazovski (Russian, 1817–1900)
Characters: Xiao x F!Reader (Y/N), implied traveler x Xiao at end, ft. Venti and Paimon Fandom: Genshin Impact WC: 8.2k words Tags: character death, immortal(?) x mortal, grief, sadness, tears, angst, spoilers for Xiao’s voice lines and stories, Xiao might be slightly OOC in some scenes A/N: I’m pretty sure you can’t call Xiao an immortal since yakshas can die and stuff but like they live a long time so it sorta works HAHA. Also this hasn’t really been beta read and so there’s probably a couple of mistakes, sorry about that!
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pls remember to reblog if you like any of my recs, luv you and thank you in advance❤️
WHY ARE ALL OF THEM SO FUCKING GOOD????????! pls tRUST me
gojo eating you out
gojo x dacryphilia
gojo loves fat pussy
sending gojo an accidental nude so he sends you a whole video
car sex with gojo
gojo being goofy in an elevator full of people - he´s big on PDA
gojo tried to give himself a haircut and now wants to go bald - this is fuNNY ksksks, I love the banter
trying to break up with yandere!gojo - yep, we´re talkin about lovesick toxic obsessed type of gojo, break up????? you know better than to tell him that sooo since you´re acting dUMB he has to fucc so sense into you bc clearly you forgot who tf ur talking to - LDKJSDFJDJFHLSHFLSHDF but he´s not rough bc he luvss you a lot
gojo is the pussy fairy - fwb, he´s your sneaky link when henessy makes you act up. he got a mf tongue piercing bYEE
insecure bully!gojo - angst, lil fluff, he´s a bully but he´s in love with that, but it´s not enough. part 2
the horniest - smut, ITS SO GOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDD, he´s horny af, pussy drunk, obsessed, borderline crazy for that wap
phone calls - slice of life, hubby!gojo, dilf!gojo, his wife and his daughter are his only priority, this is so sdkfjskdjfh :´( i love it
cherished moments - clanleader!gojo, hubby!gojo who is a softy for his wife, #simp
family moments - fluff, slice of life, this is so wholesomeee, bf!gojo meeting your parents for the first time, i love it
someone older - smut, rich dilf!gojo, big age gap, big dicc too, talks big shit as well, "what do you do when your boyfriend cheats? you go to his house and fuck his dad" I MEAN- skdfhksdf
best of the best - smut, fwb! satoru, big sHIT talker omg, he lit asks you to be his gf wHILE he´s making you cum,,,,,best bf ever tho
love struck - fluffy, ex-fuckboy!satoru, he´s experiencing love for the first time :((((( IT´S SO CUTEEEEEEEEEE
love dumb - fluff, blurb, you make him lose his composure, can´t even focus bc you´re over there existing, someone should make a longer version of this! so good
too much - ANGSTTTYYYY, fluff too, reader and gojo are in a situationship kinda thing where they live together and love each other but nothing has been said yet, they get into an argument bc gojo has a big mouth and says a lot of hurtful things, they´re both just so exhausted
i know you still think about the times we had - angst, fluff, rich bf!gojo, his father makes you break up with him, it´s so angsty omg, they get into this HUGE argument bc gojo´s dad is a controlling mf
sanctuary - fluff, lowkey angst, weak!reader, bully!gojo, nah he´s just in love but doesn´t know how to say it
the road to falling in love - fluff, strangers to lovers, it´s a collection o moments where keeps falling harder for you, I LOVE ITTTTT, sdkfjhskdjf it´s kinda slow burn but not boring at all
loving you - fluffy af, "you’re the apple of his eyes; the love of his life. the only one who matters" ME N WHO???? pls this made my want to cry my heart out
yuji finds out gojo has a family - fluff, lowkey angst, hubby!gojo, dad!gojo, so,,, this made me cry, i love yuji sm he deserves the world :( this is part two and it also made me crY MY MF EYES OUT :))))))))
i´ll meet you forever in this memory - fluff, college au, married life au, it´s so good, he lit has this big ass plan to make you fall for him, and i mean big, like planned way ahead lmao, 10 years later he´s still asking you to go out with him,,,,even if you´re already married sdlfkjkdfhlsdjh so so cute
can´t stop drinking - ANGST, death, blood, dad!gojo, husband!gojo, mentions of wanting to die, a curse kills you and your son allegedly but in reality the elders had lied to him all these years, part 2 made me fucking cry, PLEASEEE I NEED PART 3
hype man - crack, fluff, supportive bf!gojo, he´s such an amazing bf :(, “damn, my girl ran you over with a bus, reversed, then got out and shot you twice in the foot? what did you do?? sounds like a you issue.” LMAOOOOO this is so cute and funny at the same time, i love it, such a gojo thing to say
flicker of flame - fluff, nervous soon to be dad!gojo, pregnant!reader, he´s going to be the best dad ever
when you break up and make up - nanami divorce au, angst
dorm room escapades - smut, dad´s bestfriend!nanami, age gap, GAWWDD DAMNNNN, daddy kink, this is some good stuff
you ask him to fuck you like a whore - its a short one but me likey
nanami drabbles - pwp, pls yall readdd part 2 and part 3
nanami is strong af - short blurb, smut, sdflksjd this got me giggling and shii
fifteen minutes - “Say that again. Louder. Can’t hear shit with the sound of my dick slapping into your cunt.” that´s all I have to say, your honor
protective - headcanon, hubby!kento, i love thissss
swear it´s just right for you - smut, fluff, hubby!nanami, I´m weaaaak, he´s so husband material
stressed after work - boyfriend! kento, a cute lil drabble bc he loves your mere presence
labour of love - fluff, vanilla smut, lowkey angst if you´ve been keeping up with the manga/anime, loving hubby!kento, SO DOMESTIC, love making, :(
losing his mind - smut, dom!reader, hubby!kento, sub!kento, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW, 10000/10, now this is new
his protégé - fluff, slice of life, fiancé!kento, dinner time with yuuji, it´s so wholesome :´)
my future is with you - fluff, unexpected angst, this is SICKKKKKKK, the last senteces is fucking sickening, and NOT in a good way, so fucking wrong for that, I litteraly wanna dIE
tie my tie, marry me - fluff, slice of life, "the moment nanami knew he never wanted to tie his tie by himself ever again and wanted to spend the rest of his life by your side" please just do yourself a favor and READ THIS
putting you in your place - smut, reader is gojo´s brat little sister, mean!nanami, BRAT TAMER!NANAMI, HEAVY degradation, “Maybe this was your fucking goal all along. To have me ruin you on my cock and fuck the attitude out of you.” CALL 911
edging - smut, pwp, fluff, this,,,,this is one the BEST nanami smuts out there, i just know the description of the whole thing is 100% accurate, the details, the way this is written, the visuaLSsss ldskjfhjsalfh go read it pls
married man - fluff, work au, HE IS A PROUD HUSBAND OK, the man was just waiting for somebody to say sOMETHING sljsdhfl now he can´t stop bragging about his perfect wife
toji x size kink
toji x pussy spanking ´till you´re squirting - the title says it all,,, he´s MEAN
toji doing push ups with you on his back - you´re basically a rag doll,,,bc wdym he puts you in a fULL NELSON??
toji gets embarrased - the man WHIMPERED bc the riding was gewdd so reader kinda teases him for it, how dare she right? so now he has to make her pAY bc he aint no bitch
silk sheets n sticky cum - toji can´t control himself when he sees you in a nightgown so he uses you as a cum dump,,, in a very romantic way flsjdflkssldfjlsdfh, breeding kink
toji x overstimulation - fINALLY he got what he deserved, reader got him WHIMPERING, body shaking eyes rolling to the back of his head and everythangggg, I'm here for it.
take it lil princess - toji got me fucked up, straight up size kink like FRRRR he wants to break, bend and basically snap you in half (i´ll let him tbh), daddy kink, he got a big dicc as aLWAYS, the degRADING DIRTY TALKKK???? yes. he talks and talks and tALKS. there´s a lot going on yall
mine - toji mixed with monster!porn,,, nothing else to say- HE´S A WEREWOLfff, mean asf, breeding kink, daddy kink, size kink, it´s nasty
jealous daddy - slice of life, dilf!toji, megumi is a baby, toji and megumi create a plan to keep you away from megumi´s kindergarden teacher lmaooo, its so cute
nyphomaniac - smut, nypho!reader, dom!toji, THERE´S A WHOLE LOTTA STUFF GOING ON HEREE, just read it omg
family man - fluff, soft dad!toji, baby megumi, husband!toji, he´s a softie for his son and his wife ;(
unprecedented reveal - smut, fluff, mma!toji, journalist!reader, lowkey angst, "photo leaks of toji going down on you in public is suddenly exposed for everyone to know about the infamous fighters girlfriend" wELL dssdfh that´ll do it
will always be yours - smut, fluff, so basically toji only does rough sex, doggy style being his fav, but when it comes to you he prefers the loving-face to face-intense eye contanct type of sex (more like love making) bc being with you makes him feel ten different emotions at once :) DÑFLJSLDFJ
unspoken memories - fluff, lowkey angst, dad!toji, baby!megumi, married life, my heart is so full after reading this, it´s so domestic, so adorable, such a happy read
make a mess on his face - smut, toji is a messy pussy eater, that´s it, that´s the tweet
gimme, gimme more - rich!geto x stripper!reader, lots of plot and build up, he is misteriousssss and fucking filthy and so cuTE??????? wtf, the wating game is real, he knows how to play his cards very well, LAWDD HAVE MERCY i would have folded too
gripping the headboard with one hand - smut, “what a slut.” hELP
protective hubby - teacher!suguru, pregnant wife oc, it´s cutee
focus - suggestive, flirty!geto, tutor!geto, “you’re doing so good for me… keep going.” I HATE ITTTTTTTT, i would fold like a mf lawn chair bitch OOF
dress shopping - very suggestive, WHY IS HE SO SMOOTH WITH IT ALL THE TIME??? got me blushing and sweating and shit
phoque - crack, teacher!suguru, twin girls dad!suguru, he accidentally curses in front of his daughters and now he´s gotta make up some bullshit story to save his ass, SLFHSLDKJHSLDH this is funny
picture perfect - smut, photographer choso, he´s lowkey a perv, jacks off to oc´s pictures
suckig souls - smut, succubus oc, somnophilia, sub! choso, lil dacryphilia, love love love love it
meanie - smut, mean!choso, “Why you actin’ like some dick-starved whore? I fucked you good this morning" THE WAY I SCREAMEDDDDDDDD “Is that what you needed, princess? Some good dick?" STOOOOOOOOOPPPP
your pleasure - smut, squirting, choso discovers the magic of eating pussy :))))) aND he´s a fucking natural too like ???? gTFO
it´s too much - smut, dom!reader, inexperienced!choso and sub!chose fics are like crack to me, i´m obsessed, this is so detailed, he is eager to please sdlfjls and wants to try it all at once
fingers in his hair - smut, chose loves having his hair pulled when he´s eating pussy,,,,,,,CALL A MF AMBULANCE a bitch just died
cherry blossoms - smut, virgin!choso, phone sex, it´s his first orgasm yall, not yuji talking about a "sloppy toppy" LSJFHLSJDFHLFDH he´s so outta pocket
vivid fantasies - smut, sukuna wants to bone you and he makes it yuji’s problem sakfhkshfksfd poor yuji
gojo and geto are rich besties and they coax you into a poly relationship - smut
you slap their ass - reaction. gojo, geto, sukuna, nanami, choso, toji, megumi, itadori, yuta
too much for them to handle - toji and gojo version. it´s a LOT going here as well. gojo is a whole swiTCH. toji is a bully in the sheets so you know he´s all abou that degrading teasing dirty talk, we love it
slut him out - gojo, geto, nanami and toji version. y'know what,,,idek what to say about thi- IT´S NASTY FILTHY JUST PORN, reader is a whOre (not my words), read at your own risk bc i was SHOOk
how jjk men like it - smut, the gojo and toji one,,, i HATe it hereee
bimbo bunny - smut, choso, toji and nanami version, the vISUALs I GOT FROM THE NANAMI ONE LAWDDDD
birthday boy - smut, birthday sex, dacryphilia, i just KNOWWWW this is geto
owo
Chain Time?
It's-a me, Mod... Trash??? I still don't have a nAME-
@mod-sei @dont-mind-me-i-just-exist @official-ellie-rose @crystu-cii @creator-r @ask-henry-sickmin-revenged
And anyone else who wants to use this Picrew!
10:30pm
there is mentioning of blood so please beware
“this isn’t fair. . .”
“xiao—”
“shut up—SHUT UP! this isn’t— this isn’t fair! why—”
“xiao, please just—”
“NO! you. . . you knew exactly what you were doing! you— you lied to me. . . why? why did you lie?” the adeptus growled as tears pricked at the corners of his eyes. what was this?
“i’m sorry!” you pleaded as xiao pressed the tip of his spear into your neck.
“don’t bullshit me! you’re not sorry, you— just SHUT UP!” he screamed out in anger as a small drop of blood dripped down your neck and onto the floor. “you worked for those. . . damn harbingers those. . . damn liars! now look at you, a liar yourself.”
“i’m not a liar xiao! please let me explain! i—”
“say another word and i’ll slice your throat.” the adeptus growled lightly.
he loved you so dearly, he adored you, yet you had the audacity to lie, to his face
“i knew i never should have trusted you—”
“xiao— you’re hurting me!” you scream out in pain as the tip of his spear pierced deeper into your skin. his eyes widen as he looked down at your neck, your blood pooled at your feet.
what was he doing?
. . .
he was protecting the world from a liar
he clenched his jaw before grabbing your neck and pushing you onto the floor, tears streaming down his cheeks as the tip of his spear was pressed to your throat once again.
“xiao?”
“i’m sorry my love. . .”
“xiao?!—”
“but there can only be one monster in this world. . .”
“and i don’t want it to be you. . .”
likes and reblogs are appreciated ! please don’t translate, plagiarize, or use for asmr purposes without permission and proper credit !
V i g i l
A/N: Here is the Kazuha angst, sweeties :')) I wrote this with my prepared angsty playlist hehe- I.. well, my heart cracked..
✤ She/her
Words: 3.9k
"Text in this format means dialogue in flashback!"
≿————- ❈ ————-≾
The memory of peering into the crib with excited blabbers remains fresh, untarnished with the passing of time.
It feels like it’s just yesterday when your mother reached for the wailing baby laying inside to hand him in your caring touch.
“This is your little brother, [Name].” you squealed when the boy clung unto your finger, “His name is Kazuha. Be a good sister for him, understand?”
“Yes!”
Ah, that did feel as if it was just yesterday.
“Nee-chan!”
Dropping the basket of laundry, you frantically looked around.
“Nee-chan!”
“Kazuha-!?”
He was sprinting, arms flailing as tears spilled past his eyes and panicked exclaims left his lips. His friend was chasing him from behind, laughing as he waved an undercooked fish—your brother’s worst nightmare.
Comedic but understandable.
“Tomo’s making me eat it!” your younger brother mumbled behind you, pointing accusingly towards his friend who sheepishly spluttered excuses at your stern gaze.
Taking the skewered fish in Tomo’s hands, you hummed, patting his and Kazuha’s heads.
“How about I cook something for the both of you, instead? How’s that sound?”
“Yes, please! Nee-chan’s cooking is the best!”
You can never get tired of cooking for the two of them, even if your sibling eventually asked to be taught, you find yourself still taking over cooking duty. Lovingly whipping up dishes is your forte.
It stuck around when the household eventually lost the attending servants following the fall of the Kaedehara clan. It even stuck through the grim times of your parents’ passing.
Kazuha had went through so much at a young age, changed little by little—and you aren’t oblivious to it. With his growth, you are a witness to his budding shell of maturity.
Single years fold into a decade and all of a sudden, the mirthful silverette who doesn’t last a day without calling you ‘big sister’ has grown up.
Far too quickly, to be honest, but who are you to hold him back?
“You don’t call me ‘nee-san’ nowadays,” you laugh jokingly, “My, you’ve grown so much, Kazu!”
He stares at the plates of food you set on the dining table, his sigh small and feeble as you continue gushing. Albeit he has a smile on his face, it appears tight. Forced.
But you turn a blind eye to that—you’ve always been doing it.
Now, however, it seems that your brother has grown tired of humoring you. It has been going on for too long.
“I’m not some child anymore..” his monotonous voice is so unlike him—it’s as if he no longer is the person you grew up with.
Having him address it bluntly prompts you to pause, the only sound being the sizzling of unagi meat, frying to perfection. The richness of its color, however, dulls when you process what your sibling has mentioned.
As if its vividness is an illusion meant to shield you from present-day reality.
Still, you shake it away, keeping the smile on your face as you set the fried meat on a new plate, turning to put it down on the table beside the other dishes.
“Oh, Ka-“ you stop, seeing the look in his eyes.
The way his carmine optics bore against your [c]s is foreign.
It’s scary.
It’s different. It’s new.
You sit down in front of him, trying not to show how restless you’ve become. Such an attempt is futile, of course, since you’re in front of the person you’ve been with for years.
“Kazu-“
Thud!
Silence zips your lips when he lays his chopsticks down. It isn’t by any means a slam—but someone like Kazuha doesn’t need to be outright with anything in order to express a negative opinion.
“So please refrain from initiating unnecessary coddling,” he cuts you off with a swivel as he leaves for the door. “I have grown up now, sister. I... need you less.”
What?
A multitude of emotions hit you at once, all coming from his sudden statement that feels like it can tear you apart. But oh—who were you kidding?
You know that this will eventually come.
The very day where he admits that he is capable of being alone. Without you.
The opening of the door causes you to stand from your chair, “Wait!”
He does as you said but doesn’t look back. His hand remains on the handle of the knob, unchanging of his decision to leave.
You tug the black and red scarf from your neck, inching close to the man so you can wrap it around his neck. “It’s cold outside.. won’t you at least eat something?”
It takes him a moment to respond—but his decision does not change.
He detangles the fabric on his neck and, without looking you in the eye, sets it in your hand, rejecting your offer.
“Later.”
And he’s gone.
≿————- ❈ ————-≾
Nothing changed much after he left with that declaration.
Often times he still returns in the dead of night, a smile on his face. It will only ever droop when you come in the room greeting him a lovely evening, and he will sigh.
“I told you not to wait up for me.”
He will depart for his room before he can hear your explanation.
It leaves you hanging, hollow with bitter hope and refusal to believe that you both have reached that time in life where he doesn’t need you as much.
Each time he turns his back, you are filled to the brim with sorrow you didn’t know you’re capable of holding.
Retreating to the upper floor of your home, you will stay at the balcony sighing your concerns away to the stars. To the place where you believe your parents are staying, listening to your bouts of frustration and worry.
“Was I a good sibling for him, mother? Father?” you’ll sometimes mutter as you play with your silver locks, the only thing you share with your sibling other than the forgotten name of a once esteemed clan.
And as you vent all these to the stars, you remain oblivious to the lone figure hiding by the shadows in the adjacent room. His frown is tiny. Sad, but not guilty.
Kazuha will leave once again before he’ll hear his sister’s frustrated cries.
Sometimes, he will chew over it when he is wandering Inazuma—thinking, pondering if perhaps there could’ve been a way to say it without hurting his sibling. But as he contemplates over and over, he finds that there is no easy method to admitting the truth.
His friend Tomo, albeit not being told anything, is naturally cognizant of the things revolving around the silver-haired siblings. The older sister’s presence has been diminishing and he can count her appearances at Kazuha’s side getting less.
He has implied several times to make up with the female even if they had no outright argument, and when faced with a baffled question of ‘why’, Tomo only smiles.
“Because you’re family.”
So simple and yet—when Kazuha thinks of the matter a minute longer, the taste in his tongue becomes acrid.
“What upsets you?” his friend questions as he coos over his white feline, “You’re not the Kazuha who’s always crying for big sister, heh.”
The silverette cannot even find it within him to send a retort. His silence, to others, is a message that typifies a want to be alone—but to Tomo, who has known him since they’re both children, that silence is different.
With a hum, he stretches his limbs, yawning as his cat rolls around the grass.
“You know, [Name] won’t hate you for wanting it,” he starts, “You want to wander, don’t you? But you feel like you’re tied down. You’re grounded—because [Name] is here.”
Kazuha flinches and his friend snickers.
Spot on.
“I’m just going to repeat what I said because I meant it, Kazuha. Tell her the truth. She’s literally the most understanding person I know—it’s not like she’s going to despise you for wanting something.”
“… I’ll think about it.”
Tomo sighs. It’s not what I was hoping for but it’s a start.
Remembering something that moment, Tomo lets out a loud scream that nearly sent his friend toppling in the nearby stream of water. Kazuha looks on with slightly wide eyes as the other man jumps to his feet, violet eyes gleaming.
“Oh, right! I plan to initiate another challenge!”
Another challenge…
Kazuha closes his eyes with a hum, “I do hope you’ll last another. You’ve been faced with the worst of the worst.”
The chuckles that leave his friend’s lips are excited and sort of expectant.
“It’s going to be the ultimate one of all! So if you’ll excuse me~”
≿————- ❈ ————-≾
Perhaps a talk with your brother will do you both good.
You’ve both been acting like strangers walking on eggshells underneath the same house and it is driving you insane. He’s not even looking you in the eye anymore!
Given his quiet personality, confrontation will be difficult, but he’s a cooperative person. Besides, he always hears you out.
There isn’t any reason for him not to when he knows that this will be done only for the betterment of the future.
So, with a nervous disposition but eager heart to settle things right, you lift the basket from its place with plans to head over to the market. It’s an hour or two before dusk, just the perfect time to shop for dinner.
“Mm.. some dry-braised salted fish for tonight sounds lovely.” You muse, remembering how the dish is your brother’s favorite.
Ah, the number of tries he takes to perfect and stylish it into his own can’t be forgotten.
It doesn’t take too long to cook it, but you’ll be making tons of other side dishes and dessert, so it’s best to start early!
You exit the abode, the smile on your face present as ever even when you’re greeted outside by a couple of Shogunate Soldiers. Their features appear sterner, their hold on their naginata rock solid.
“Are you Kaedehara [Name]?”
Hm?
“Yes. Can I help you?”
The soldiers lunge forward, spears falling to a position pointing at you from all possible angles, cutting any means of escape as you furrow your brows. “What’s the meaning of this?”
“Your brother has defied the Decree of the Shogun and was hereby declared a criminal. Going against an Imperial Decree results in punishment inclusive to his immediate family.”
Your basket falls to the ground.
Thud!
Kazuha’s feet create a loud sound following his landing, a breath of panic expelling past as he rushes away.
The warmth in his hand escalates to a scalding degree, burning and searing like the fading power of Electro held within the golden casing.
To think that that was what Tomo meant.. !
He does not feel anger, no, just the burn of desperation and want to hide his friend’s Vision because he doesn’t want it to be taken away—to be placed in that statue that displays the lost ambitions of many others.
He’ll be damned before the Shogunate can take it… !
The criminal evades those at his tail, making swift maneuvers on rooftops and alleys without a second thought. His limbs are answering his every command, be it to duck, to jump—or to even draw his blade.
He is still ways away from the port but getting there won’t prove to be too complex for someone like him. He’s cut down plenty of the samurai in his escape from Tenshukaku,
Tomo…
“You’re family. Tell her.”
Family—
“This is the first one in a long time I’ve heard of it being extended-! To whom again? The clan that has lost its prestige a decade ago, right?” he almost trips in his sprinting, darting to an alleyway so he can further eavesdrop.
Did I hear that correctly?
A relieved sigh escapes when those chasing him run past his hiding spot.
Sucking in his breath, the silverette tightens his grip on the faded Vision of his best friend as he listens in the hushed conversation.
“Be quiet!” someone hisses, “If someone overhears us, what next? Still, I do feel bad.. they lost so much already. I can’t believe they’d drag an innocent person into it, too..”
“Well, there’s nothing we can do. The Shogun issued the penalty to immediate families, right? As far as I know, there are only two Kaedeharas left—”
Kazuha feels his heart stopping. Kaede..hara?
There’s no mistaking it.
But why—?
Why would a punishment meant for him extend to her?
She’s innocent!
Going off-course, he sprints in the direction of his house. The house that he lives in with his sister who takes great care of him—the same sister he’s willing to leave in favor of chasing what he wants in life.
He’s willing to, but he doesn’t.
Because perhaps—perhaps if he stayed and buried his desire, then he will amount to the same greatness she has done for him. But he cannot stand it, either. As patient as he is, as kind and ‘gentle’, [Name] can always see through his face.
He’s always been antsy—always itching to wander and he’s stumped that his sister is well-aware of that fact. Still, she’s always playing the ignorant one, pretending not to care- still coddling him as if he’s little and he’s had… enough of it.
But now that the situation has pinned this misfortune upon them, the ronin realizes that she’s only pretending for his sake, as well.
“Cut that out, I don’t need it. I fear that.. you will only embarrass yourself.”
Wasn’t it him who refused to tell her of his want to roam free in the first place?
“I understand that I am your brother—but there is no need to worry over me all the time. I can look after myself, [Name]. Do worry about something else, instead.”
Wasn’t it him who stuck around, still?
The bitterness in his tongue increases with each leap of his feet. He doesn’t even process the race of his heart as he’s carried through the same path that leads him home. To his family—to his only sister.
Everything seems to pass by slowly, in a blur, like the specks that decorate his vision the more his mind throws stacks and stacks of memories. This is madness.
Complete and utter madness.
He rounds the corner to see the figure of his only sibling, her back turned to him—she cannot see him, but he can see the armed soldiers flanking around her.
His throat tightens and certainly, he wouldn’t have been able to utter a word due to how it feels like his throat has been crushed.
“[Name]!”
Yet, the furious scream that tears past his lips denies all kinds of ‘impossibility’ the instant he sees the female falling to the ground, the sight of red splatter making him draw his blade.
Whoosh!
The summoned wind is opposingly gentle to the brewing storm in someone’s beautiful carmine eyes.
“[Name]-.. !”
That voice.. Kazuha?
Sometimes, the depth of emotion in Kazuha’s eyes is too deep for you to understand. Despite being so silent, he’s so, so expressive with his stares.
That even when he isn’t trembling when he lifts your torso, you know how much he’s quaking from within.
“What are you.. doing here? You have to go,” you cough red when he adjusts you in his arms, the sight of the fallen soldiers reminding you of the situation at hand. “Quick—before they.. catch you.”
He shakes his head,
“I’m taking you with me, I have a boat prepared, come, let’s—”
“Don’t lie to me, Kazuha.”
He pauses, flitting his gaze down to meet yours. You hate how you can’t seem to focus on him, though. Your sight is blurring in and out, only providing small intervals of clarity where you can see the panic in his features.
A sight you didn’t think you’d see on him until now.
“I know you made it for yourself. You’ve been planning to leave home, weren’t you? I’m not..” you’re not oblivious to his wish, “I’m not mad. I was only holding you back, wasn’t I?”
He sucks in a breath.
“I-I-“
What was he supposed to say?
Weakly tapping his arm, you start taking quick breaths—just to take in all the air you can while tolerating the gaping wound from being impaled.
It hurts. You want to scream. It hurts.
But you don’t—because you do not want to appear weak to your brother.
You promised mother and father that you will not cry when faced with problems—he mustn’t see, Kazuha mustn’t see. But at this moment, you just want to break apart. Disbelief is kicking in, you can’t believe this is happening.
When—where did everything go wrong?
“Besides, I’m not of use to you anymore. As if I’ll last the journey to Liyue-“
“Don’t say that!”
You blink owlishly, gasping out in pain when his hand presses against your wound, futilely attempting to hold back the bleeding.
“K-Kazuha?”
Your own hand shakily plants itself atop his own, helping him press—as if his hand isn’t heavy enough to stop the flow—it down. It will hurt, but you can’t say for sure. You’ve already grown numb and your head is swimming.
Still, you focus on him.
Still, you help him apply pressure even if you know—even if he knows—that it’s too late.
“Don’t say that. You’ve..” his voice cracks, “You’ve done so much, [Name], you-“
You took over the clan household when our parents died. You struggled to make ends meet for both of us. And yet.. all I do.. all I do is… !
Kazuha angrily bites on his lip, his hold on his composure beginning to slip as his mind throws in a reel of olden days.
“I’m leaving, [Name]. Please don’t wait up, I may take longer.”
“I’m grateful, but I don’t need that anymore.”
“Stop that, already.”
He dips his head with a muffled cry. All I do is wander and desire for a future where I can roam freely. I haven’t even thought of you..!
“You’ve grown, Kazuha,” he snaps back into this harsh reality when he feels the hand atop his disappear, presently moving to brush his messy locks.
He doesn’t know why all of a sudden his sight is becoming misty, but perhaps—perhaps it is because he remembers when his sister used to brush his hair the same way with a loving smile.
It is the same touch he flees from nowadays.
The same touch now—the same loving smile.
“As much as I hate to admit it, you’re right—you’ve grown so much.. and I’m still clinging onto the past.”
So lively, so beautiful and yet—
“You’re strong now..”
Yet it’s dying.
He presses harder on his sibling’s wound, almost sadistically—as if he’s hoping that it’ll ignite a painful reaction. “[Name], please, let me-“
Because if it hurt—then it means she’s still okay. She’s still responding.
“So capable.. so independent, you are.”
So why—? He almost chokes out a sob. Why are you not reacting to it!?
“Mother and father would be so proud of you. I am sorry if I was lacking in any way.”
“Please, [Name], you can’t do this.” He trembles, the composure he created so, so close to breaking as he gives up on endeavors that are pointless, to begin with. Instead, he tilts his head up, wishing to curse the heavens above.
For everything.
“I’m happy to be your sister, and.. I’m proud of you… Kazu..”
“Wait-“ he stumbles over his words, catching the falling hand of his sibling and registering how deathly pale she has gotten in a matter of seconds. “Wait, please—I-“
As much as he wants to voice out he’s sorry. For many things; for turning his back on her, for being distant when all they have is each other, he’s unable to find his voice when he sees the tears dripping out of his sister’s [c] eyes.
His strong older sister—weeping. It’s the first time he has seen her cry.
Her smile trembles—
“I love you. My nice.. little.. brother.”
—And her [c]s are then hidden forever.
The way she endearingly called him in her dying breath has him freezing, his heart pausing as if he had died along with her. But then the spark of pain welcomes him back to reality—to life.
And then he is leaning over her.
“[Name]..” breathless whispers escalate into panicked murmurs. “[Name]?”
His heart is pounding in his chest as he tries to shake her awake, like when he’d do when he’s eight and awake from an awful dream.
“Nee-san.. can I sleep by your side tonight?”
And although her [c] eyes are tired, she will still smile. “Okay.”
And she’d keep watch over him the whole night.
He’s reminded of it when he hopelessly shakes her awake, to no obvious avail. But he keeps grasping her arms, anyway, like he used to many years ago.
But things are different now.
“[Name]—[N-Name]!?”
He said it himself—he’s no longer a child.
“Please, don’t leave me- I- you’re all I have left!” The ronin’s composure finally breaks loose and his tears begin landing like a profuse waterfall. His uncontained sobs remain unheard.
This time, there is no one to wake him up from his nightmares.
“No—no, no- no, please..!” Kazuha weeps as he holds his sister’s cold hand, shakily pressing it to his forehead, imitating the sweet action she has always given him. A hand on his head, on his shoulder—or on his cheek if he’s tearful. “You can’t!”
She’ll tell him not to be sad because it’ll make her sad, too.
And he’ll hurriedly wipe his tears because ‘no! big sister mustn’t feel sad because of me!’.
Then [Name] will muster a smile as bright as the sun and hold his face in her warm hands, and press a kiss on his forehead. He’ll get red and thrash around, whining, ‘onee-san!’. And about how embarrassing it is so she mustn’t do it anymore.
Now, he is holding her hand in his own, trying to remember the same warmth it emitted just a day ago. Just a few hours ago. How long has it been?
And when he doesn’t feel the warmth—when he doesn’t remember the warmth, when all he feels is the cold and the obvious lack of love, Kazuha breaks apart.
His heart squeezes and his tears spill more, his lips parting to release the honorific he has dropped a long, long time ago. “Nee-san!”
“You don’t call me ‘nee-san’ nowadays,”
“Onee-san!”
“My, you’ve grown so much, Kazu!”
“Onee-san!”
I’m calling you. He cries, like a picture of misery. So why aren’t you waking up? Sister! He cries, like a heartbroken child.
The winds around him pick up, warning him of incoming men sent to apprehend and penalize him the same way they did to his sibling. It’s suffocating—maddening, even, and he wants to tear them all down himself.
But [Name] wouldn’t like that.
So, with a muted cry and bolster of willpower, he tears himself from the body of his kin, trembling.
He can hear the thundering steps of the samurai as he hurries to untangle the same black and red scarf [Name] has once attempted to give him. The same fabric he has rejected.
“I’m sorry.. I’m so sorry.” he hugs her with all his might, with his soul, and with his heart before he’s back up on his feet and running. I love you, too, nee-san.
“Get him!” someone roars from behind.
And although he wishes to turn and slice them away, he couldn’t—because he’d be seeing the fallen figure of the same person he had neglected to cherish. So, instead, he nestles the scarf around his neck whilst clutching onto the Vision of his friend.
Down the path, he runs.
Years ago, he will be accompanied by the people he loves, chasing a faraway future.
Now he is running on the same path alone, running after a dream that can now be turned into reality.
Far from Inazuma.
Far from home.
≿————- ❈ ————-≾
a/n: did it hurt-
‧͙⁺˚*・༓☾ Return to the Scrying Glass ☽༓・*˚⁺‧͙
≿————- taglist ————-≾
@lehra @melkxsh
ganyu x hongjoong❄️
art trade with @/sprainedankel on twt
I'm surprised by how little love and affection pics there are for Genshin but I just wanted to send you an appreciation post! I hope you're doing well and that your day is going great. Be sure to hydrate and take care of yourself!
Who sent this I wanna say I love you