Warnings: Angst (as I always start off writing for a fandom with angst), MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, body is still treated like shit after death
Summary: You knew Vyn would never look twice in your way yet you had hoped that maybe... just maybe he would... once...
Notes in advance: That's right I'm writing for tears of Themis now bc I am addicted so send in those requests babe <33
Vyn Richter is a lot of things to you. He's your childhood friend, a psychiatrist, calculated, noble, and most importantly, logical.
That's what you told yourself when you found out you had feelings for him. Might as well break the fall before you die from it.
He didn't do love unless he was positive of it. He was never uncertain, each step of his was calculated, strong, with the very best outcome for himself and those around him.
You also learned more about him.
How he liked his tea, how he only drank one specific type of wine, how he liked his eggs in the morning.
Needless to say, you knew more about him than he did about you.
It wasn't that he wasn't able to read you, it had just been that he had never bothered reading you. Which you assumed was either because he trusted you since he grew up with you, or that he just didn't think of you as significant enough.
Vyn as a child had been cold, had been neglected. His father was a foreigner, his mother... he had no memory of, his cousins, always aloof and acting harshly because he was a mixed child.
It was no different from growing up in an exaggerated tv drama.
But you, the little child next door, had always thrown plushes over the fence to his backyard. You threw one over on accident while playing with it, but when Vyn picked one up, and you had watched him hug the toy for a second, before letting it drop. The slightest pain on his face before it had straightened up again. You had hardened your resolve to make that boy next door feel better.
When elementary school started, you befriended Vyn immediately. You started off by asking for help, before eventually sticking with him during recess. He had gotten laughed at and bullied quite a bit for having foreign features, and you were having none of that. You beat them up with your bare fists.
When middle school came, both of you dove into your studies. Stellis city was the top in education, and being a resident there of an upper class family, neither of you had the chance of ever slacking off. It would bring dishonour, and then both of you would get berated.
Then came high school. Vyn finding that he was invested in criminal psychology, and you still not knowing what you wanted to be. You were torn for days over this. Everyone else knew what they wanted to be, what they wanted to do, yet you were slowly being left behind. So you hardened your resolve and told yourself that until Vyn had someone who could take care of him, you would stay by his side.
You got into the same university as Vyn.
You cried, without telling him, about the news, and while he nagged at you for neglecting your health for your college exam, you knew he felt relieved when you made it in as well.
University was never any easier than it should've been. Both of you dove deeper into your studies with Vyn going into criminal psychology and you into behavioural psychology. You needed to learn to read people and protect yourself... and Vyn.
Then after both of you getting your doctorate, you became coworkers. You had thought you had a chance. But that was diminished very quickly. Vyn had started to grow distant after a phone call, and you pretended that it was alright.
You didn't let that stop the routine though. Breakfast at his place, lunch in his office, the other staff had joked that you two were pretty much a married couple. but you knew that he never thought of you that way.
Then he met someone new. A mysterious girl who was different to you in so many ways. She was confident, elegant, intelligent. Working at Themis law, became famous for winning a case for the Pax group's son.
Vyn was enamoured by her.
So were you.
She was everything you could've only hoped to be.
While Vyn spoke to you about how wonderful she was, you found yourself offering help in being around her. You befriended her, and you knew exactly why she was loved by all, she just had that personality and character.
When the PUA victim ran to Vyn for help, you told him that you'd be resting for a bit. You would've been a big help, but you felt as though you'd be third wheeling on them.
So while Vyn tracked down the PUA group with her, you found yourself slowly letting go. It began with the messages, then the meetings, eventually the meals together.
It was slow, and Vyn would have probably not realized it at all if one of the patients hadn't spoken up about it.
"Dr. Richter... where's your assistant Y/n?"
Then Vyn realized that he hadn't seen you in the last weeks. It was like you disappeared.
He didn't think much of it until he felt empty.
"Y/n can you-" You're not there anymore.
"I have these files Y/n can you-"
"Y/n did-"
Then he receives news that you had left the hospital. Rumors of you two getting into a fight circulated and Vyn found himself irked.
That was when he realized something.
He grows more irritated without you. There's no one to lighten up his day in the morning or remind him to stop scratching himself when he feels uneasy.
No one was there to tell him that he should really stop pulling on his hair, to stop downing 4 espressos a day.
Meanwhile you had met a woman named Jasmine. A woman who was investigating Opaline village, and needed the help of a psychiatrist. A woman who had a little child, whom received help from the girl that Vyn loved.
You two were driving back from gathering evidence when the car swerved.
The last thing you saw was a white light.
Vyn is baffled when your name appears in a NXX file.
What were you doing there?
You had gotten into a murder disguised as an accident.
You died.
You died and somehow it was related to the drug they were researching on.
Then for the first time, the organization watched him lose his composure and break down.
The only person who had stuck by his side his entire life had left forever.
He tried to find your grave, but your family never held a funeral for you. You had betrayed them by becoming a psychiatrist while all of them were deeply religious. They cursed you, saying that this was how the heavens were punishing you. Your body got donated to scientists for research. Vyn never got to send you off or give you a flower, all he had left of you was that faltering smile the last time you met up with him.
You had left him with nothing.
Nothing except those whispered words the last time you met up.
"I hope I'd be your favourite crime"
why did I accidentally reblogged my own post this is embarrassing
And the result for first semester in form 6 is coming out this Wednesday what a wonderful day
You what đ BTW I'M BACK HHHHHH
HELLO HELLO I'M JUST HERE TO THANK YOU FOR THE XIAO CONTENT--- Seriously tho I live for your writing like it's so kjskdbkn,, đđđđđđâ€ïžđâ„ïžđđđ
OH HEY! Itâs nice to see you and talk! Iâm so bad at starting conversation itâs kinda insane so thanks for reaching out haha. Also, thank you so much for your kind words on @xiaotopia fic^^ I totally donât stalk her shhh you didnât hear it from me.Â
BUT THANK YOU FOR LOVING THE XIAO CONTENT AND WATCHING ME FALL INTO A BLACKHOLE OF XIAO BRAINROT đđđ Weâre in this together. Holding hands as we sing kumbaya as the brainworms consume us. How lovely is that?Â
Haha, aww Iâm glad you like my writing^^ Iâm still trying to figure out a good writing style but I see you and I agree. We need more cat xiao content. Iâm so tempted to say screw everything, this is all Iâm going to post for the next week but I really canât do that haha. When I finish my inbox thatâs the first thing Iâm posting. No questions asked. In this house we only believe in Xiao. Always Xiao. You think youâre rolling for Ganyu or Hu Tao? I think the fuck not, itâs only Xiao.Â
xiaoven date but with zhongli as their chaperone
bonus
I want to live by myself when I move out of my parent's place but I'm really afraid of money problems? I'm afraid that the only place I can afford will be in the ghetto and it'll all be torn apart and I'll only be allowed to eat one granola bar a week. I'm really stressing out about this. I don't know anything about after school life. I don't know anything about paying bills or how to buy an apartment and it's really scaring me. is there anything you know that can help me?
HI darling,
Iâve actually got a super wonderful masterpost for you to check out:
Home
what the hell is a mortgage?
first apartment essentials checklist
how to care for cacti and succulents
the care and keeping of plants
Getting an apartment
Money
earn rewards by taking polls
how to coupon
what to do when you canât pay your bills
see if youâre paying too much for your cell phone bill
how to save money
How to Balance a Check Book
How to do Your Own Taxes
Health
how to take care of yourself when youâre sick
things to bring to a doctorâs appointment
how to get free therapy
what to expect from your first gynecologist appointment
how to make a doctorâs appointment
how to pick a health insurance plan
how to avoid a hangover
a list of stress relievers
how to remove a splinter
Emergency
what to do if you get pulled over by a cop
a list of hotlines in a crisis
things to keep in your car in case of an emergency
how to do the heimlich maneuver
Job
time management
create a resume
find the right career
how to pick a major
how to avoid a hangover
how to interview for a job
how to stop procrastinating
How to write cover letters
Travel
ULTIMATE PACKING LIST
Traveling for Cheap
Travel Accessories
The Best Way to Pack a Suitcase
How To Read A Map
How to Apply For A Passport
How to Make A Travel Budget
Better You
read the news
leave your childhood traumas behind
how to quit smoking
how to knit
how to stop biting your nails
how to stop procrastinating
how to stop skipping breakfast
how to stop micromanaging
how to stop avoiding asking for help
how to stop swearing constantly
how to stop being a pushover
learn another language
how to improve your self-esteem
how to sew
learn how to embroider
how to love yourself
100 tips for life
Apartments/Houses/Moving
Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 1: Are You Sure? (The Responsible One)
Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 2: Finding the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)
Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 3: Questions to Ask about the Damn Apartment (The Responsible One)
Moving Out and Getting an Apartment, Part 4: Packing and Moving All of Your Shit (The Responsible One)
How to Protect Your Home Against Break-Ins (The Responsible One)
Education
How to Find a Fucking College (The Sudden Adult)
How to Find Some Fucking Money for College (The Sudden Adult)
What to Do When You Canât Afford Your #1 Post-Secondary School (The Sudden Adult)
Stop Shitting on Community College Kids (Why Community College is Fucking Awesome) (The Responsible One)
How to Ask for a Recommendation Letter (The Responsible One)
How to Choose a College Major (The Sudden Adult)
Finances
How to Write a Goddamn Check (The Responsible One)
How to Convince Credit Companies Youâre Not a Worthless Bag of Shit (The Responsible One)
Debit vs Credit (The Responsible One)
What to Do if Your Wallet is Stolen/Lost (The Sudden Adult)
Budgeting 101 (The Responsible One)
Important Tax Links to Know (The Responsible One)
How to Choose a Bank Without Screwing Yourself (The Responsible One)
Job Hunting
How to Write a Resume Like a Boss (The Responsible One)
How to Write a Cover Letter Someone Will Actually Read (The Responsible One)
How to Handle a Phone Interview without Fucking Up (The Responsible One)
10 Sites to Start Your Job Search (The Responsible One)
Life Skills
Staying in Touch with Friends/Family (The Sudden Adult)
Bar Etiquette (The Sudden Adult)
What to Do After a Car Accident (The Sudden Adult)
Grow Up and Buy Your Own Groceries (The Responsible One)
How to Survive Plane Trips (The Sudden Adult)
How to Make a List of Goals (The Responsible One)
How to Stop Whining and Make a Damn Appointment (The Responsible One)
Miscellaneous
What to Expect from the Hell that is Jury Duty (The Responsible One)
Relationships
Marriage: What the Fuck Does It Mean and How the Hell Do I Know When Iâm Ready? (Guest post - The Northwest Adult)
How Fucked Are You for Moving In with Your Significant Other: An Interview with an Actual Real-Life Couple Living Together⹠(mintypineapple  and catastrofries)
Travel & Vehicles
How to Winterize Your Piece of Shit Vehicle (The Responsible One)
How to Make Public Transportation Your Bitch (The Responsible One)
Other Blog Features
Apps for Asshats
Harsh Truths & Bitter Reminders
Asks Iâll Probably Need to Refer People to Later
Apartments (or Life Skills) - How Not to Live in Filth (The Sudden Adult)
Finances - Tax Basics (The Responsible One)
Important Documents - How to Get a Copy of Your Birth Certificate (The Responsible One)
Important Documents - How to Get a Replacement ID (The Responsible One)
Health - How to Deal with a Chemical Burn (The Responsible One)
Job Hunting - List of Jobs Based on Social Interaction Levels (The Sudden Adult)
Job Hunting - How to Avoid Falling into a Pit of Despair While Job Hunting (The Responsible One)
Job Hunting - Questions to Ask in an Interview (The Responsible One)
Life Skills - First-Time Flying Tips (The Sudden Adult)
Life Skills - How to Ask a Good Question (The Responsible One)
Life Skills - Reasons to Take a Foreign Language (The Responsible One)
Life Skills - Opening a Bar Tab (The Sudden Adult)
Relationships - Long Distance Relationships: How to Stay in Contact (The Responsible One)
Adult Cheat Sheet:
what to do if your pet gets lost
removing stains from your carpet
how to know if youâre eligible for food stamps
throwing a dinner party
iâm pregnant, now what?
first aid tools to keep in your house
how to keep a clean kitchen
learning how to become independent from your parents
job interview tips
opening your first bank account
what to do if you lose your wallet
tips for cheap furniture
easy ways to cut your spending
selecting the right tires for your car
taking out your first loan
picking out the right credit card
how to get out of parking tickets
how to fix a leaky faucet
get all of your news in one place
getting rid of mice & rats in your house
when to go to the e.r.
buying your first home
how to buy your first stocks
guide to brewing coffee
first apartment essentials checklist
coping with a job you hate
30 books to read before youâre 30
whatâs the deal with retirement?
difference between insurances
Once youâve looked over all those cool links, I have some general advice for you on how you can have some sort of support system going for you:
You may decide to leave home for many different reasons, including:
wishing to live independently
location difficulties â for example, the need to move closer to university
conflict with your parents
being asked to leave by your parents.
Itâs common to be a little unsure when you make a decision like leaving home. You may choose to move, but find that you face problems you didnât anticipate, such as:
Unreadiness â you may find you are not quite ready to handle all the responsibilities.
Money worries â bills including rent, utilities like gas and electricity and the cost of groceries may catch you by surprise, especially if you are used to your parents providing for everything. Debt may become an issue.
Flatmate problems â issues such as paying bills on time, sharing housework equally, friends who never pay board, but stay anyway, and lifestyle incompatibilities (such as a non-drug-user flatting with a drug user) may result in hostilities and arguments.
Think about how your parents may be feeling and talk with them if they are worried about you. Most parents want their children to be happy and independent, but they might be concerned about a lot of different things. For example:
They may worry that you are not ready.
They may be sad because they will miss you.
They may think you shouldnât leave home until you are married or have bought a house.
They may be concerned about the people you have chosen to live with.
Reassure your parents that you will keep in touch and visit regularly. Try to leave on a positive note. Hopefully, they are happy about your plans and support your decision.
Tips include:
Donât make a rash decision â consider the situation carefully. Are you ready to live independently? Do you make enough money to support yourself? Are you moving out for the right reasons?
Draw up a realistic budget â donât forget to include âhiddenâ expenses such as the propertyâs security deposit or bond (usually four weeksâ rent), connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
Communicate â avoid misunderstandings, hostilities and arguments by talking openly and respectfully about your concerns with flatmates and parents. Make sure youâre open to their point of view too â getting along is a two-way street.
Keep in touch â talk to your parents about regular home visits: for example, having Sunday night dinner together every week.
Work out acceptable behaviour â if your parents donât like your flatmate(s), find out why. It is usually the behaviour rather than the person that causes offence (for example, swearing or smoking). Out of respect for your parents, ask your flatmate(s) to be on their best behaviour when your parents visit and do the same for them.
Ask for help â if things are becoming difficult, donât be too proud to ask your parents for help. They have a lot of life experience.
Not everyone who leaves home can return home or ask their parents for help in times of trouble. If you have been thrown out of home or left home to escape abuse or conflict, you may be too young or unprepared to cope.
If you are a fostered child, you will have to leave the state-care system when you turn 18, but you may not be ready to make the sudden transition to independence.
If you need support, help is available from a range of community and government organisations. Assistance includes emergency accommodation and food vouchers. If you canât call your parents or foster parents, call one of the associations below for information, advice and assistance.
Your doctor
Kids Helpline Tel. 1800 55 1800
Lifeline Tel. 13 11 44
Home Ground Services Tel. 1800 048 325
Relationships Australia Tel. 1300 364 277
Centrelink Crisis or Special Help Tel. 13 28 50
Tenants Union of Victoria Tel. (03) 9416 2577
Try to solve any problems before you leave home. Donât leave because of a fight or other family difficulty if you can possibly avoid it.
Draw up a realistic budget that includes âhiddenâ expenses, such as bond, connection fees for utilities, and home and contents insurance.
Remember that you can get help from a range of community and government organizations.Â
(source)
Keep me updated? xx
Random art
âł gojou satoru x f!reader
â series masterlist
summary. with an arranged marriage set in place, the sacred bond is doomed with a wife who wants to make the relationship work and a husband whoâs ready to ruin it all. unbeknown to him, a tragic fate already lies within the pages of his romance book.
genre. heavy angst, arranged marriage, ceo au, 18+
word count. 213k
fic warnings. mean!gojo, VERY OOC, adultery/infidelity, profanity, explicit smut, violence, emotional trauma/physical abuse from past experiences, neglect, heavy family drama, illnesses, classism, pregnancy, undertones of masochism, undertones of manipulation, abandonment issues, overall toxic relationships, graphic depictions of self-harm, suicide/murder (and attempts thereof), minor character death, plot loosely based on twotm & tre. please read with proper discretion. this is a work of fiction. all characters are written to portray roles that are necessary to the plot and are in no way a reflection of their canon counterparts.
fic art + playlist + gallery + faqs + ko-fi + misc + podcast feature
one + two + three + four + five + six + seven + eight + nine + ten + eleven + twelve + thirteen + fourteen + fifteen + sixteen + seventeen + eighteen + nineteen + twenty (final) + sequel
status: completed
all rights reserved © 2021 saintobio. please do not copy, repost, translate, or modify my works in any platform.
âż Remember to read part one first!Â
â Prologue/summary: Desperate to get away from your memory of Scaramouche, you left in search of a new beginning. Can you really escape your past with him as easily as it is ideal?
â Pairing(s): Harbinger! Scaramouche x gn! reader
â Themes/warnings: Spoilers for Scaramoucheâs backstory/main archon quest, mentions of violence, Angst.
â Dollâs note: Ahh hello! ( â)/ Sorry for the wait, but Iâm really excited to finally present what Iâve been working on! Some of your replies gave me a good chuckle, theyâre really motivating! But seriously, thank you<3
â word count: 2.2k
âż masterlist (not yet posted) âż requested by: N/A, original conceptÂ
Itâs been around a week since your last encounter with Scaramouche.Â
The plentiful amount of time to yourself has allowed you to reflect on all the poor decisions that led you to your current position. Love has truly made you lose sight of who you were and blinded you from your original motives. It was something that you, out of all people, could never have imagined falling victim to.
The passing fields youâre walking through were finally losing their familiarity, as the only thing pushing you to keep on moving is the wish to be somewhere far from a place that reminded you of your shared memories with him. Over time it has been cultivating many mixed emotions, which, although intense, you couldnât quite identify as good or bad ones. All of it together was becoming incredibly frustrating because feeling so much emotion has always been foreign to you.
Despite your pitiful situation, the archons seemed to do their damn best to send even more troubles your way. You were just oh-so-lucky enough to receive your very own version of typical winter Inazuma weather on your way out, which was somehow even more unforgiving than usual.Â
Perhaps as a means to cope with your pain, you were slowly starting to grow numb to hurting. You quickly went from mourning over your loss to seeing red all around you. Every misfortune you experienced throughout your travels was his fault to begin with, it only made sense that the grief gradually seeped in as anger. It was all too overbearing, your sanity was merely hanging on by a thread.
âMercy⊠please.. archons⊠save meâŠ.â
It only enraged you further to watch the treasure hoarder before you to plead for mercy after witnessing the brutal deaths of their comrades. He was just like you to Scaramouche, a pathetic resemblance of someone who thought they were special enough to be granted an exception.Â
When the glowing ashes of his corpse dissipated away, silence took over in your returning solitude. You thought your mind would finally be relieved of this frustration, for you to be finally feeling something else, anything else after murdering those pitiful people.Â
Why has it done absolutely nothing?Â
âI thought I heard people yelling here but I donât seem to see anyone else, are you alright miss?â A male voice spoke out from behind you.Â
The man introduced himself as Tighnari, an Avidya Forest Watcher who was in the middle of a research report on the nearby area. The sudden realization that youâve already made it to Sumeru makes you wonder how you even lasted so long without resting.
âItâs our responsibility to aid travelers in need.âÂ
He smiled gently as he offered you a hand. You eyed his tall animal ears with a momentâs curiosity before getting up yourself, dusting off your clothes from the debris of your short-lived battle.Â
It took quite a bit of unwanted conversation to cover up your deeds, you didnât want to stir up additional commotion to the situation at hand. Yes, treasure hoarders werenât the best kind of people but that alone was no justification for being the subject of your wrath.
âI was.. just looking for something to eat.â
It wasnât exactly a lie, itâs been about three days since the time you last ate. Even so, that instance could barely even be referred to as a proper meal because berries arenât considered the most satiating.Â
Tighnari took pity upon your weak appearance and offered to take you back to Gandharva Ville with him. Despite the fact that you didnât want to follow him at first, you can only ignore your looming exhaustion so many times until your body eventually gives out. You might be tough, but still human nonetheless. With the help of his assistant, he provided you with medical supplies and dinner, which you hesitantly accepted.Â
The next two months went by rather slowly. You have begun to live amongst the rest of the people in Gandharva Ville along with Tighnari and Collei, as a forest ranger yourself. It wasnât a job that made the most out of your vision potential, but you had nothing to use them for anyway. Your past with the Fatui and Scaramouche has been less insistent on plaguing your mind once you settled down in a new environment, it was a pleasant change of pace. Your heart was gathering up its pieces, yet the emptiness youâve felt before has made its way back into your daily routine. This peaceful way of living would always be infinitely better than the mental torment that he would have put you through.
Anything would be better than that, right?
It wasnât until you heard his name again, that you have managed to keep your emotions at bay.Â
The sages from the Akademiya have come to attempt to convince Tighnari to return to Sumeru city. The prestigious institution took notice of his exceptional intellect and thought of his current position as a waste of his talents as a scholar. It just seemed like a minor inconvenience at first, so you decided to tend to your assigned duties a little earlier.
Just as you were returning to deliver your updated report to Tighnari, the sages were on their way out. You were just about to dismiss their presence when you overheard a familiar name.
âDr. Dottore needs us to go later tonight, to help with their project with the Balladeer.â
âHis name was Scaramouche, right?â
Your report scattered all across the forest path, your trembling fingers unable to hold on to their delicate pages at what you just heard. You could feel your chest begin to heave rapidly as your mind became a jumbled mess. Everything to do with this man should have been behind you, never to reappear in your thoughts again, so why now?
Why?
Why, why, WHY?
You had to find out for what wretched reason the Akademiya was included in a scheme associating with such a painful part of your memory, so you abandoned your original plans to follow them back into the city.
It turns out that the sages have been working together with Dottore in the late stages of developing Scaramoucheâs artificial god form. You didnât know what your plan was before, but it was never your goal to come this close to actually encountering him.
âŠ
You stepped into the forest cavern, right before where he is held from the information you collected. Do you really want to see him again? Why are you even here?
In spite of the voices in your head, his face etched itself into your mind. You were brimming with emotions, your weakness for the man never left you after all.Â
There wasnât much logic left behind your thoughts, the only force driving your actions being an unreasonable craving. You revealed the hidden entrance by copying the procedure you witnessed Dotorre perform earlier, taking a final deep breath before crossing the threshold.Â
Your steps echoed throughout the large chambers of the Joururi Workshop, examining the large pieces of what you assumed were unfinished equipment in their creation of this âartificial godâ. The Fatui really does work quickly, youâd at least have to give them credit for their efficiency.
â(y/n)?â
Your heart stopped the moment you heard your name, but not because of how it belonged to you.
âWhat are you doing here?â
You turned to face the black-haired harbinger, the one that you only ever allowed yourself to remember in your dreams.Â
He looked just as gorgeous as before.Â
Your thoughts were interrupted by a loud crash, the sound of thunder hitting the spot where you once were before your reflexes barely preserved your life.
âWhat a coward you are, showing up before I can even finish my project.â
You hid behind a pile of various mechanical materials, trying to process the fact that Scaramouche was now trying to kill you. It shouldnât be the most surprising because of how you acted during your last meeting.Â
âI guess I should finally pay you back for being so disrespectful, hmm?â
Scaramoucheâs laugh was dripping with poison, making your reality now clear.
You were just so sick of it all, you were never going to find peace with the presence of this awful manâs existence in Teyvat. Your suppressed feelings after so long, resurfaced as the same bloodlust you felt the day you met those poor treasure hoarders.Â
âI have been dying to see you, Scara.â
You approached him with a smile, the rest of the confrontation was merely a blur.
âŠ
The sword that was given to you on the same day you joined the Fatui, was now pierced through your former superiorâs chest. His eyes widened, unsure of how he had ended up being on the losing end of this exchange. After all, he never paid any attention to your abilities, if only he was as observant of you as you were of him back then. You knew of his every blind spot, every little weakness that bought you just an adequate amount of time to pin him right where you wanted him.Â
It was an extensive fight where you applied all those years of experience by his side, performing the final accumulation of your feelings as a rendezvous of death.Â
I have always been watching you.
You dug your blade further in, causing his legs to give out and collapse to the ground. It was far from what would kill him instantaneously due to his lack of a real heart, but enough to sufficiently incapacitate him.
I have always longed for you.
You kneeled next to him, watching his surprise twisting into rage. Shadows from his hair cast over his face as he gritted his teeth.
But I canât have you.
âI was so closeâŠâ
So Iâll choose the next best thing.
His frame shook when his devastated eyes stared into yours.
âI WAS SO CLOSE DAMNIT, WHY THE FUCK DID YOU HAVE TO RUIN IT?â
He was lashing out at you now, upon the realization that his premature death would ultimately rip him away from what was about to be his godhood. He screamed hateful, terrible, words at you. Yet, you still pitied his helpless state.
He has never been kind to you, barely even grateful for anything youâve ever managed to accomplish for him.. Yet there were moments when he appeared so lonely. He was like a lost soul craving for something beyond what he felt was even possible, hence his want to reshape a new world.
Tears were streaming down his face, his crying voice now barely above a whisper due to the spreading fatigue. You could tell he no longer had the energy to be angry, and gently held his hand in yours. He wept quietly on the floor, relishing in your comfort within his vulnerable state.Â
You were aware of the three betrayals that shaped Scaramouche into the bitter person he was. He suffered being the abandoned subject of his creator, being viewed as if his existence as a monstrosity by the only friend heâs ever made, and the loss of a child heâs come to care for after making unkept promises to one another. You didnât want him to have nobody in his final moments, despite his flawed pessimism, and no matter how bad he used to treat you.
You both savored the stillness of the Joururi workshopâs solitude, that is until he was the one to break the silence, much to your surprise.
â..Why do you think my creator has yet to get rid of me, to allow me to wander as far out of her grasp as to even become a harbinger?âÂ
He was now reflecting in deep thought, the focus of his gaze on the intricate ceiling of the domain. Itâs like he read your mind.
ââŠMy former friend might have been right, for me to have soon become someone who hurt the lives of so many.â
You didnât expect him to ever find forgiveness, for him to finally realize that there is more to living creatures than just misery. The hopeful glint in his eyes vastly differed from the characteristics youâve come to know rather well.Â
ââŠI suppose the boyâs mortality wasnât necessarily his fault, it was cruel of me to shift the blame for my loss on him.â
He finished his declaration with a small sad chuckle, a genuine one.Â
ââŠhey.. (y/n).â
He called out to you, asking why you continue to remain by his side after his continuous exploitation of your feelings.Â
You explained to him that you cannot pick and choose what you feel. Why people care so much about seemingly unreasonable emotions was something you couldnât comprehend either.Â
This was something only he has been able to have taught you for the first time in your life, but you kept that last part to yourself. His cold fingers gave yours a light squeeze, and your chest tightened at his melancholic expression.
âFor my new understanding, Iâm eternally grateful to you.â
His chest rose and fell slowly, his trembling gradually coming to a halt.Turns out your efforts have brought him peace, one that he was unable to achieve on his own.
ââŠâŠMaybe things would be different for us if I was born human too.â
With those words, he used the last of his strength. You felt his hand loosen its grip on yours, as he succumbed to his rest. Youâve helped him move on from his past and achieve his true goal, to see a world that wasnât just filled with deceit and lies. What a truly bittersweet way for your first love to come to an end.
..But what was in it for me?
A sob escaped your throat as you cradled his unconscious form, hushed cries escalating into painful wails that resounded in the large room.Â
You refused to leave his side for hours after, you werenât ready to part with him just yet. Your reunion was so brief after all.
âŠ
Small taps of footsteps were heard behind you as you came face-to-face with a little, white-haired girl.
â(y/n), right?â
@ đ„đ°đđđ„đłđ°đ± đ°đŻ đ”đ¶đźđŁđđł | please credit if reposted! âĄ
âż Taglist: @smdroplvr @niasyndrome @shotgunsona @bananapowersrangers @kiâmiâ
welp I tried :/ I drew it with my fingers so it was hard <\3