I Feel Personally Attacked/hj

i dont wanna come right out and say it but you definitely kiss boys in ur free time

Oh js wait till I tell u what happened on monday

Darry having autism is actually my biggest comfort headcanon

(Basing this off of MY autism with overlapping adhd and ocd)(I hc him with some of all three)(projection character !)

He yearns for familiarity and follows an empty pattern in his life. He took the roll as a parent over a brother because of this. He doesn’t want Pony and Soda to go without one and thinks that if he can’t act as them, it’ll be like things are the same. He needs a routine or he will break. He can’t handle change

He doesn’t know how to show affection and it often gets misunderstood. He wants to best for his brothers and wants Pony to have the life he never had the chance to have, so he pushes him for it. He thinks he’s giving Pony a chance in life, while Pony sees it as Darry telling him that he’ll never be enough.

His outlet is anger because he struggles to show emotion. He doesn’t know how to process or show emotion that he default to anger. When he gets worried, he gets mad. When he gets scared, he gets mad. He doesn’t show much emotion, either. He stays neutral and only ever shows it when it’s huge. He’s not the best at understanding it- at all. He doesn’t get why people are upset or mad.

He craves to love, but he just can’t show it. He knows something’s wrong with him- his parents never had that problem, Soda never had that problem, Pony never had that problem. So why does he?

He always does some repetitive motion, mainly with his hands, when he’s overwhelmed or nervous- which, for him, is more often than not at this point. He has a 100yard stare when processing anything sudden and overwhelming.

He takes things to literally. He struggles to relate to others. He’s not good at communicating. He can’t maintain good relationships. He’s often told to be emotionless because he just can’t fucking get it.

He hates the way cigarettes smell, but he can’t tell the others. He hates certain foods the gang loves because of texture, but he can’t tell them. He hates how washing dishes feel, but he can’t tell the gang. They’ll all think he’s being dramatic when he’s always just overstimulated/overwhelmed.

I have so much more for this, but currently I am overwhelmed!

Be aware for more

💔

“Pony was being dramatic!” “Darry only hit him once!” “You’re telling me Darry never hit him before?” “Johnny gets hit everyday at home and doesn’t complain!”

Shush. Just, stop for a minute. I personally think that Pony’s reaction to getting slapped was justified, and it angers me a little sometimes when people chalk it down to just him being a brat. Ponyboy already thinks Darry doesn’t want him around, Darry’s constantly on Pony for every little thing, being hard on him to keep him from getting taken away. Hitting him is one thing that would get Pony taken away faster than anything else, in doing this, Darry’s accidentally sending Ponyboy a message: He doesn’t just not want him around, he wants to get rid of him as quickly as possible. 

“Oh but Darry probably hit him a lot when they were kids!” EXACTLY. When. They. Were. KIDS. Darry 100% slugged Pony a couple times bc he was being a little shit, but Darry’s stuck halfway between being a father and a brother. He’s not just Pony’s brother anymore, he’s his guardian. Pony explicitly says that no one in his family hit each other, including their parents. Pony says Darry looks exactly like their dad, in that moment, Pony can’t imagine his father hitting him. If his parents had still been alive and his father had hit him instead of Darry, Pony would’ve had the same reaction. Pony’s in shock, when someone is hurt they go into fight or flight, Pony is a track star, and also kinda scrawny. (no offense Pony) He’s gonna choose to run instead of try to fight back. Because in his mind, if Darry hit him once, who’s to say he isn’t gonna do it again?

Now onto Johnny, yes Johnny has it way, way worse at home than Pony does. But he’s also used to it, it’s sad, but true. Johnny’s used to being hit by his parents, Pony isn’t. The first hits are always the worst. We see that in Tex and The Outsiders. There’s no doubt in my mind that Johnny acted like Pony did when he was younger, when he wasn’t so used to his parents hitting him. If Darry continued to hit Pony, Pony would eventually start to act like Johnny. Learn to take it. I also don’t think that Johnny was mad/annoyed with Pony for acting like he did. Maybe Johnny was a little jealous when Pony used to complain that Darry hated him. But that was before Darry hit him, Johnny’s probably a little mad at Darry too, being honest. Darry’s supposed to be the one holding them together. The one refuge most greasers on the East side have. Johnny probably knew deep down that Darry was scared and most likely felt bad and won’t do it again. But you still don’t hit people when you’re scared. Johnny has never been hit out of fear, every time his parents beat on him it’s out of anger. You hit out of anger, you fight back out of fear. 

So no, Pony didn’t deserve to be slapped. He wasn’t asking for it. They lost their parents less than a year ago. Darry is 20 years old for fuck’s sake! I bet some of you reading this right now are either older than that or only a year or two younger. 20 is arguably still a kid, and 20 should not be the age to take on two jobs, maintaining a house, and taking care of two teenagers, plus 4 other teens and oh, I don’t know, almost everyone in eastern Tulsa? That’s too much to ask of anyone. Even if Pony was being a little shit (which he usually is, but in the argument that night I would say Darry kind of instigated it more, at least in the book/movie) that still doesn’t mean he deserved the hit, or shove, in the movie’s case. 

Thank you for coming to my ted talk, I really needed to just put that out there. I’m seeing so many people ratting on Pony for the way he acted, especially comparing him to the way Johnny is treated at home. Which isn’t fair in my opinion. Thank u for listening! 💜

@natur3sf1rstgr33n @magefelixir @staygoldspiiderrah @marciavalance @sonnysimagination@polishravagingasexual @dairyfairyy @curtis-brothers-hug @penguinstuff @colequette@therealtwobit67 @far-away-from-tulsa @strxwberry-julius @fawning4leif @im14andivebeen14foramonth @chipperdipperr @stayruby @averagefandomist @johnnycademyschmookie @maxiebearz @totoroboiii

i goon to color crew

does anyone remember this

things that happened to me when i was a woman in STEM:

an advisor humiliated me in front of an entire lab group because of a call I made in his place when he wouldn't reply to my e-mails for months

he later delegated part of my master's thesis work to a 19-year old male undergrad without my approval

a male scientist at a NASA conference looked me up and down and asked when i was graduating and if i was open to a job at his company. right before inquiring what my ethnicity was because i "looked exotic"

a random male member of the public began talking over me and my female advisor, an oceanographer with a pHD and decades of experience, saying he knew more about oceanography than us

things that have happened to me since becoming a man in STEM:

being asked consistently for advice on projects despite being completely new to a position

male colleagues approaching me to drop candid information regarding our partners / higher ups that I was not privy to before

lenience toward my work in a way I haven't experienced before. incredible understanding when I need to take time off to care for my family.

conference rooms go silent when I start talking. no side chatter. I get a baseline level of attention and focus from people that's very unfamiliar and genuinely difficult for me to wrap my head around.

like. yes some PI's will still be assholes regardless of the gender of their subordinates but, I've lived this transition. misogyny in STEM is killing women's careers, and trans men can and do experience male privilege.

so real

learned how to use blenders film making tools

The Greaser’s Favorite & Least Favorite Things In The Modern World.

➼ Darry Curtis:

-Favorite Thing: Twitter (I can’t explain this) -Least Favorite Thing: Inflation💀💀

➼ Ponyboy Curtis:

-Favorite Thing: Broadway Musicals -Least Favorite Thing: Life 360 (Darry Uses It On Him)

➼ Sodapop Curtis:

-Favorite Thing: Taylor Swift -Least Favorite Thing: Search History

➼ Dallas Winston:

-Favorite Thing: Snapchat -Least Favorite Thing: Pepper Spray

➼ Steve Randle:

-Favorite Thing: Vapes -Least Favorite Thing: Dating Apps

➼ Two Bit Matthews:

-Favorite Thing: Disneyland -Least Favorite Thing: Drake (He follows the rap beef)

➼ Johnny Cade:

-Favorite Thing: Child Protection Services 😭😭😭😭 (I’m So Evil) -Least Favorite Thing: UBER Drives/Drivers

im sobbing

“Ponyboy, I asked the nurse to give you this book so you could finish it. The doctor came in a while ago but I knew anyway. I keep getting tireder and tireder. Listen, I don't mind dying now. It’s worth it. It’s worth saving those kids. Their lives are worth more then mine, they have more to live for. Some of their parents came by to thank me and I know it was worth it. Tell Dally it’s worth it. I'm just going to miss you guys. I've been thinking about it, and that poem, that guy that wrote it, he meant you’re gold when you’re a kid, like green. When you're a kid everything's new, dawn. It's just when you get used to everything that it's day. Like the way you dig sunsets, Pony. That's gold. Keep that way, it’s a good way to be. I want you to tell Dally to look at one. He’ll probably think you're crazy but ask for me. I don't think he's ever really seen a sunset. And don't be so bugged over being a greaser. You still have a lot of time to make yourself be what you want. There's still lots of good in the world. Tell Dally. I don't think he knows. Your buddy, Johnny”

― S.E. Hinton, The Outsiders