I Love Pinterest 😭

You getting a job as a personal assistant for Ateez, but all your Job includes is them fucking you before and after performances because they can’t perform with a hard on and also like to be drained after because it builds back up again.

Ok but picture this, Agatha goes on a life death?changing field trip with Billy. Probably they find Tommy and Wanda, and Wanda restores Agatha’s body since she kind of saved both her kids.

Rio expects Agatha to run as soon as her feet physically hit solid ground again, but she just…doesn’t. Like Rio shows up and is all, “what’s it going to be? Where are you going to run this time coward???”

And Agatha just looks at her, looks around, looks at her and is like, “did I not tell you to fix my damn yard?”

Rio is stunned. Like of all the responses. And Agatha is being (mostly) serious. She clearly expects Death (capital D) to do her damn landscaping. And before Rio can figure out how to react, Agatha is like, “that includes my door and sink. Who tf throws the actual kitchen sink at someone. It’s supposed to be a figure of speech, you overgrown hipster!” And just throws her hands in the air and starts towards the house. Rio is so flabbergasted that she just leaves for a bit. But not before fixing the door. Every time she comes back she expects Agatha to be gone, but nope, there she is, inexplicably hanging out in New Jersey. Sometimes she’s teaching the boys. Sometimes she and Wanda are having philosophical arguments (aka she’s also teaching Wanda but neither is willing to admit it. Rio refuses to leave until Wanda does on those occasions.)

Occasionally she takes trips to other places for various reasons. She nails a note to the door specifically for Rio with detailed instructions for Señor Scratchy and a plea to leave her damn azaleas alone. (Rio does not, and Agatha often comes home to a well fed bunny and man-eating flowers. How one makes azaleas man-eating is anyone’s guess, but Agatha’s money is on semi-divine spite.) Every time she returns to find Rio sulking on the porch. Which is odd because sometimes she has to rush out of the house to get in position. Like Agatha has started to walk up her driveway and seen Rio fling herself out the door and onto the front steps to glare at her. (Señor is a very relaxing bunny and sometimes Rio loses track of time ok.) Neither of them discuss this beyond Agatha rolling her eyes and inviting her back in for a drink or dinner or what have you.

This continues for a truly obnoxious amount of time until Rio finally decides that Agatha is done hiding from her and decides to become the biggest nuisance in existence. Agatha is always annoyed but she never sends Rio away. The worst she does is bitch and moan, and occasionally throw something at her ex-maybe current-wife. If she’s doing something truly important, or, more often, if it looks like Rio is thinking a little too hard about murdering the twins, she’ll tell her to go play somewhere else for a bit. Rio always snarls and growls but she usually heads off for a couple of days. The problem is almost always that she’s either bored or stressed. She always finds herself back in Westview to annoy Agatha eventually. (Sometimes if she’s in a very good mood, Rio will help with the twins’ lessons. But don’t tell anyone.)

Eventually they settle into what everyone else can tell is a relationship, but which they both firmly deny is anything more than a convent arrangement. They make this everyone’s problem, in true agathario fashion, but no one seems to really mind.

Idk, just something I have rattling around in my head.

She is so stinking cute. It's not even funny.

a better look into agatha’s house in AAA (provided by twitter, if i remember the link i’ll add it here!):

dinner table room

another shot of the dinner table room

the living room ( the image of agnes sprawled in that couch is engrained in my mind)

i think living room again? maybe a study next to the living room

agnes’ room

nicky’s room ( i want his wallpaper)

lastly but not least the basement (+ a sneak peek into the road)

my endermen headcanons (don't like if you're not going to reblog)

"B★BY YOU'RE THE B★DDEST GIRL" ⸝⸝ ...Beauty things to script

full credit & inspiration goes to @saisiprincessa <3

BITCH, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?! Who gave me the right to be this damn pussy-clenching, soul-snatching, mind-warping gorgeous?! Like, be so for real right now. Every single inch of me? Immaculate. It’s almost unfair how I walk into a room and immediately become the center of the universe. Like, sorry babe, I can’t help that I’m the main event.

You don’t look at me, you worship me. I AM THE DREAM. I am beauty, brains, body, power, seduction, and mystery all packed into one flawless package. If they dared to make a mold of me, they’d have to destroy it on the spot—it would be a pitiful insult to my unparalleled PERFECTION, which simply cannot be replicated.

And don’t get me started on the way people fold for me. I say jump, they ask how high. I smile, and they lose all common sense. One look? They’re hooked. One touch? It’s over. I could ruin lives if I wanted to—and let’s be real, I probably have. Not my fault they can’t handle all this.

I move like royalty ‘cause I am royalty. My presence alone is a gift. I don’t lift a finger—things just happen for me. VIP treatment? Automatic. First-class everything? Of course. Doors open, drinks appear, bills get paid. Just for existing. Just for being me.

I step outside, and men fumble their words. Women try not to stare too hard. People make workouts to look like me. Doctors get requests for my features. My name is whispered in rooms I haven’t even stepped foot in. People see me and IMMEDIATELY feel insecure—it’s not my fault, babe, blame genetics.

I am THE blueprint. THE standard. You can't strive to be exactly like me. My body is what Instagram models are trying (and failing) to achieve. My face is what FaceTune was created for. My energy? Unmatched. My aura? Untouchable. My confidence? So loud it makes people shake.

As soon as I grace a room with my presence, eyes lock, mouths drop, and suddenly everybody forgets what they were doing. I make people nervous without even trying. Just a glance, a smirk, the flick of my wrist, and boom—somebody’s in love.

I wake up flawless, go to sleep iconic. I don’t need filters, angles, or good lighting—baby, I am the moment. Every photo? A masterpiece. Every mirror? A love letter to myself. I could roll out of bed and still look better than half these girls on their best day.

And these other girls? They stay pressed. They act like they don’t see me, but I know they do. They talk, they stalk, they try—but let’s be clear, there’s only one me. I’m the blueprint, the one they measure themselves against.

Don't think I don't notice the girls who study me like I’m a whole syllabus, trying to decode the formula. But there isn't a blueprint for this—either you got it, or you don’t. And I got it.

And these men? These women? Losing their minds tryna be in my presence. I could sneeze, and somebody would cash app me just for existing. From bags to jewelry to whole-ass cars, they offer before I even ask. Billionaire sons? CEOs? Athletes? Begging. They know a once-in-a-lifetime when they see one.

Jealousy? Oh, it’s there. But I don’t compete, I dominate. The envy, the whispers, the imitation—it doesn't faze me. They can watch, they can study, but they can’t be me. I’m the prototype, the standard, the one they all wanna be but can’t touch.

This ain’t regular pretty. This is war-starting, history-making, legend-building beauty. The kinda face that gets songs written, statues built, kingdoms lost. Pretty privilege? Nah. Pretty power.

Other girls break their necks trying to figure out how it’s even possible for one woman to serve this much face, body, and energy. But let me tell you something, sweetie, when you’re me, you move differently. People might lose their minds over me, but my security is tighter than a vault—mentally, physically, spiritually, all that. You can’t touch me, even if you wanted to. The jealousy? Cute. The obsession? Predictable. But it never phases me. "The universe knows better than to let anyone try me, because when you’re this blessed, nothing bad can even get close. Call it divine protection or just the power of being that girl, but either way? I’m untouchable.

"Everybody wanna know me. Wanna be me. Wanna please me. They hold doors, pull out chairs, throw money just to get a second of my time. Even the haters can’t help but admire. They talk & they watch but they still losing. ‘Cause you can copy the outfit, the pose, the walk—but you can’t copy me.

I leave ‘em speechless, stuck, obsessed, weak-in-knees. "I got exes still crying, still checking my page, still hoping I look their way again. Love, I don’t double back, I level up. And these new ones? Willing to risk it all—careers, relationships, sanity—just for the chance to say my name.

You think I’m exaggerating? Ask your man why he’s been quiet. Ask your girl why she suddenly wanna switch teams. It’s me, bitch. IT’S ALWAYS ME. And if that’s annoying?? GOOD. BECAUSE A BITCH THIS PERFECT DESERVES TO BE LOUD ABOUT IT.

A list of some names for 13,022 Palestinian children who were killed by Israel in #Gaza in just 111 days.

If this is not genocide then what!!

random melissa schemmenti headcanons!

a/n: if you disagree pls be respectful i just wanna ramble about my gf

warnings: none

~~

she has little firetruck toys at her desk

i can't decide whether her coffee is 1 cream, 1 sugar or just black

ADHD

she loves disney movies but will never admit it

Rainbow Kitten Surprise, Chappell Roan, David Bowie, System Of A Down, Queen, and Kate Bush enthusiast!

she hums to herself while doing her silly little tasks

organizes her clothes by occasion, then colour

sticky notes so she doesn't forget stuff

knows how to do black hairstyles (you can fight me on this)

she blasts music in the car

calls > texts

baths > showers

she snores and is a really deep sleeper

wakes up early but she's still grumpy in the mornings

she loves online shopping

bisexual

she knits while she watches tv to keep her focused

she can play the guitar

i started doing yoga with her during the weekends to help with her joint pain

doesn't go to church every week but she does go with barbara sometimes

she can and will make you a playlist

highlights and annotates her books to make it easier for herself

has a tendency to overspend

she loves drive in movies

"nobody's got time for that???"

fav colours are pink, black, and green

christmas enthusiast

jacob accidentally called her "mom" once and she was chill with it

speaking of jacob, she's healing his mommy issues

her stims include; shaking fists, hand flapping, foot tapping, rocking, and humming specific melodies

when she gets in a silly mood she doesn't stop yapping. she will infodump for 3 hours about firetrucks or a reality show or legos or really any of her interests

she loves her wooden spoons and her special bowls

Luke 2 - retold version

The Birth of Jesus

At that time, the Roman Emperor Caesar Augustus issued a decree that everyone in the empire must be registered in a census. This meant that each person had to travel to their ancestral hometown.

Joseph, a descendant of King David, lived in Nazareth in Galilee. He went to Bethlehem, David’s hometown, with Mary, who was engaged to him and expecting a child.

While they were there, the time came for Mary to give birth. She gave birth to her firstborn son, wrapped him in strips of cloth, and laid him in a manger because there was no room for them in the inn.

The Shepherds and the Angels

That night, some shepherds were staying out in the fields nearby, watching over their flocks. Suddenly, an angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone all around them. The shepherds were terrified, but the angel said, “Don’t be afraid! I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people. Today, in Bethlehem, a Savior has been born. He is the Messiah, the Lord. You will find him wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”

Then, a vast host of angels appeared, praising God and saying, “Glory to God in the highest, and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased.”

When the angels returned to heaven, the shepherds said, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened!” They hurried to the village and found Mary and Joseph, with the baby lying in the manger.

After seeing him, the shepherds told everyone what the angel had said about this child. All who heard their story were amazed. Mary treasured these things in her heart and thought about them often. The shepherds went back to their fields, praising God for everything they had seen and heard.

Jesus Presented at the Temple

Eight days later, the baby was circumcised and officially named Jesus, the name the angel had given him before he was conceived.

When the time came for Mary and Joseph to follow the purification laws, they brought Jesus to the temple in Jerusalem to dedicate him to the Lord, as the Law of Moses required. They offered a sacrifice of two doves or pigeons, which was the customary offering for those who couldn’t afford a lamb.

At the temple, there was a man named Simeon. He was righteous and devout, eagerly waiting for the Messiah to come and rescue Israel. The Holy Spirit had revealed to him that he wouldn’t die before seeing the Lord’s Messiah.

Moved by the Spirit, Simeon went to the temple. When Mary and Joseph brought Jesus to be dedicated, Simeon took the baby in his arms and praised God:

“Lord, now I can die in peace,

as You have promised.

I have seen Your salvation,

prepared for all people—

a light to reveal You to the nations,

and the glory of Your people Israel.”

Mary and Joseph were amazed at what Simeon said. Then Simeon blessed them and told Mary, “This child is destined to cause many in Israel to rise and fall. He will be a sign from God, but many will oppose him. And a sword will pierce your own soul, too.”

There was also a prophetess named Anna, an elderly widow who lived in the temple and worshiped God with fasting and prayer day and night. When she saw Jesus, she gave thanks to God and spoke about him to everyone waiting for the redemption of Jerusalem.

Jesus Returns to Nazareth

When Mary and Joseph had done everything required by God’s law, they returned to Nazareth in Galilee. Jesus grew up healthy and strong, filled with wisdom, and God’s favor was upon him.

The Boy Jesus in the Temple

Every year, Jesus’ parents traveled to Jerusalem for the Passover Festival. When Jesus was twelve years old, they went as usual. After the festival ended, they started their journey home, but Jesus stayed behind in Jerusalem without them realizing it.

Assuming he was with the group, they traveled for a day before they began looking for him among their relatives and friends. When they couldn’t find him, they returned to Jerusalem to search for him.

After three days, they found him in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them, and asking questions. Everyone who heard him was amazed at his understanding and answers.

When Mary and Joseph saw him, they were astonished. Mary said, “Son, why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been frantic, searching for you everywhere!”

Jesus replied, “Why were you searching for me? Didn’t you know I must be in my Father’s house?” But they didn’t fully understand what he meant.

Jesus returned to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them. Mary treasured all these things in her heart.

Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and people.

I just had a revelation thinking about endermen speculative biology. What if enderpearls are crystallized chorus fruit? Similar to oyster pearls.

Think about it, the only native food in the end are chorus fruit and they’re everywhere and endermen need energy so they probably eat it. But, speculating that endermen do not have typical digestive tracts and do not expel waste, then what happens after the chorus fruit is eaten? Instead of expelling waste, everything is retained to make use of every piece of energy in such a low nutrient environment. In the digestive tract the chorus fruit is drained of its teleportation properties and the fruit itself becomes basically, a raisin. After a period of time, enough secretions coat the raisin to become a pearl, much like an oyster. To which to pearl is coughed up or remains until it is shattered, and then coughed up.

The nature of the raisin pearl retains some teleportation properties and can be used by endermen as a source of teleportation when their source of energy has run out. A majority of endermen have multiple pearls at once but most shatter at death. Looting enchantments lower the risk of shattering multiple pearls.

Then to mites. Mite can be parasites or even enderman larvae (if given a lot of liberties) but in this situation mite eggs live in a dormant state as a grub within the chorus fruit and then pupates in the pearl, forcing discomfort so the pearl is expelled and hatched. So the mite is the pupating grub that is hatched too early for the full bug body (which I definitely want to draw and make a design for).

I do not know how eye’s of ender play in all this, and I’m too sleppy to figure it out. Uhhhh basically, nether and end do not mix, and when they do, bad/weird things happen.

It’s 4 am and I have two finals due within the next 24-48 hours.