Throwback To That One Time I Threw Twitter Into Chaos Over Whether Or Not Princess Peach Is The Artist

Can I be like you

you can be something better. you can be like you

I don't think we've really grappled with affini biorhythms, and their impact on society. We've all heard stories about them from overeager florets, or the urban legends about what happens if an affini decides to stay near you for too long. It's honestly kind of terrifying, knowing that our wills can be so easily subverted on the whim of our benevolent overlords.

But at the same time, I can't think of the last time I saw the parks on Tyriador-IV this crowded. Or the bars and restaurants, the bookstores and museums. Yes, some of that is undoubtedly that the old pollution has been scrubbed, transit has been made cheap and affordable, outdoor spaces have become vastly more pleasant, and we no longer need to work long hours just to survive. The affini claim that it is simply due to that, the fruits of their social reforms and alteration of our material circumstances. That is the easy narrative, one I haven't even heard the most rabid feralists question, though they see it as far more sinister than I believe it to be.

I think otherwise. If you're reading this post, I'd ask that you look, really look, at the spaces where people tend to congregate. The spaces and venues that fill up day after day. I'm willing to bet that, regardless of the planet or vessel you're on, you'll see the same thing I've noticed--people go where the affini are. Even with all the complaints I've seen independents make about their incessant flirting, or how unsettling it can be to be surrounded by florets, the majority of the humans here spend significant amounts of time hanging around areas also filled with affini. Even I've found myself doing it.

Nobody I've asked has even been conscious of this bias in their own behavior. Most seem to think I'm some feralist grasping at straws, or just plain crazy. But I'm not. I am as grateful as anybody that they got rid of the old fascist Accord and replaced it with this utopia. I just need people to take me seriously when I say that I think we're all unconsciously dosing ourselves on their biorhythm. Not to the point where we're getting tied to any one individual affini. But collectively? Our entire species is drifting towards subservience in ways we didn't even realize. I tried to avoid all affini this last week, staying in my hab to avoid any biorhythm exposure, and I almost had a panic attack. It was only after my Hab AI called for a crisis vet that I realized I used to have panic attacks all the time, and they'd stopped after the affini took over. Just being around them is subtly soothing, and we're slowly waltzing our collective way towards dependency.

I wonder how much easier to domesticate we've gotten after years of daily exposure. Not everyone is as on-the-brink as I am, and obviously there are still plenty of stubborn holdouts. But please, search your feelings. See if you enjoy being out and about, and then test whether you enjoy it as much if you're still outside but away from any affini. Everyone needs to be aware of this, even if I myself can't resist how much I enjoy their presence.

It's hard to even fall asleep without a biorhythm subtly pulsing through me these days. I'm very grateful that Phiola has been letting me sleep firmly nestled in her vines. But please, don't discount my words because I'm a ward, and will likely be a floret soon. This feels like important information to share, if just so all the rest of you wannabe independents can know just how deeply ensnared you already are.

-Eric Statler, he/they

I drew the art for @cadence-the-hypnotic-floret's latest HDG audio, Rescue! I highly recommend giving it a listen, it's incredibly warm and comforting and it was an absolute delight to be able to work on this with her. You can find the link below, as well as her Tumblr post about it if you'd like to learn more-

https://soundgasm.net/u/Cadence_The_Hypnotic_Floret/HDG-Rescue-HypnokinkStorytellingOral-Fixation-1

Tumblr

Post by @cadence-the-hypnotic-floret · 1 image

💬 0  🔁 6  ❤️ 13 · Rescue: a Hypnotic HDG Audio · The klaxons on your ship blare to life. The weeds. They're here. But when cornered by Diona

houseplant type friend

did not know there was such animosity towards london life. what did she ever do to you

baseball peach doodles

polaroid shirts are OUT official usps crop tops are IN

TODAY, IN RETAIL

next time you can just keep it at “no thanks”

IT'S DONE!!!

Let's just ignore that I stuck the front and back cover on upside down, because I don't feel like doing that all over again.

This tape includes all episodes of World Doctors/ Archeologists, every episode of World Doctors outreach, (excluding maybe one because I feel like there's one out there I vaguely remember but couldn't find) and some trailers/ an ad for tiny arm flavored chips in the beginning. I swiped the trailers for the spin off concepts from their FaceBook, and they're painfully low quality. I really like them as an addition though, especially with "coming to theaters near you" kinda shit before them.

This was a really fun project and even though the outcome is uh... a bit messy, I'm still happy with it!

Me wrapping up Christmas presents.