Blake: *Looks Glynda In The Eye, Flashing A Positive Pregnancy Test Where Both Women Can See But Where

I’d like to imagine this being the first time most of them have heard Neo speak.

Jaune asks Neo to marry him in front of everyone Neo says yes while crying tears of joy and hugging him what does everyone do

ruby: uuuh

weiss: awww

blake: cute

yang: *crying*

nora: also cryinh

ren: *stoic

Why did My first thought frame this as advice Summer gave (or left for) Ruby?

Either she’s still alive or she wrote up some psuedo-diary for Ruby and Yang full of all the advice she could think of in case [REDACTED] happened.

File one more under ‘Fanfic ideas I’ll probably never write.’

10 Easy Steps To An Oblivious Knight

Step 1: Make Yourself Known

Ruby: Hi. I'm Ruby Rose. What's your name?

Jaune: Ruby. We already know each other.

Step 2: Make Sure He Always Around You.

Nora: Jaune-Jaune. How come Ruby sleeping in the same bed as you?

Jaune: She said she wanted to sleep over.

Ruby:*stick her tongue out and snuggled next to Jaune*

Step 3: Fend Off Unwanted Foes

Cinder: Hai Jaune. I was wandering that if we could...never mind, I just remembered I got plans with Emerald. Bye! *Ran off*

Jaune: I wonder what's that all about.

Ruby:*holding her sycthe and glare at her foes* Stay away you husssiess...

Step 4: Always make sure he and everyone know how cool he is.

Ruby:*On top of table in cafeteria and using a speaker* JAUNE ARC HAS A HUGE DI...HMPHH!

Jaune clamped Ruby's mouth and dragged her out of the cafeteria

Step 5: Make sure he know that you needed him

Ruby: Jaune! Please open this jar pickle for me! It is so tight!

Jaune:*simply opened it with a small pop* Here you go Rubes.

Ruby: Thank you my strong knight.

Jaune: What?

Ruby: Nothing! *Dashed away*

Step 6: If he still oblivious, use a bit force

Jaune:*Only wearing a towel* Ruby! Return my clothes!

Ruby:*sniff his clothes while running* Jaune~I love your scent. *Drool*

Step 7: Insert Your Dominance

Jaune: What are you doing standing on my bed? Get down from there.

Ruby: Feel my dominance! *Proceed to T Pose*

Step 8: Always have small and constant physical contacts.

Jaune:*managed to beat Cardin*

Ruby: Nice work Jaune! *Slap his ass with a nice and firm squeeze*

Jaune: Eeeep!

Step 9: To enforce your desire for him, always remember to imagine a life with him

Ruby:*panting and moaning in bed and under the covers* Jaune! Ahh! Harder! Deeper!

Weiss, Blake and Yang covered their ears as they curse, secretly listening and cried themselves to sleep.

Step 10: If all hope is lost, Just confess

Ruby: Jaune. I like you. Would you be my boyfriend?

Jaune: Sure Ruby. I like you too. Want to see a movie tonight?

Ruby: Sure. I would love too.

Jaune: It's a date. *Kiss her lightly on the lips*

Ruby:*blushed hard*

There you have it. Follow these simple steps and the oblivious charming knight will be yours.

P/s: This steps will also works on an oblivious male ninja, oblivious female ninja, oblivious female brawler, oblivious female heiress, oblivious female babrbarian and other individual that start with an oblivious adjective.

Jaune: *read the steps written on the paper* I wonder if this will work on a certain oblivious female reaper.

Was Winter gonna ask Jaune if he was ‘suicidal’ or ‘single’?

Three live for One

Elm: Trading three lives for one is stupid.

Jaune: But why do you care?

Harriet: Because its stupid.

Jaune: We’re criminals Harriet and we’re basically risking our live to save one of our own. So again, why should you care for what happens to us?

Elm: You’re still young.

Jaune: Yet James, your general, hired us as hunters.

Harriet: But-

Jaune: Plus, if we go in and get Oscar, we might have plenty out time to get the relic we lost. Which has one last question remaining. Do you really want Salem or any her members to use it?

Vine: Hm, I see where he’s going.

Harriet: Vine, don’t be stupid. 

Vine: Harriet, our job was to find Penny.

Harriet: Again, they’re want fugitives. Traitors!

Ren: So why are you bringing us in alive?

Harriet: James order us to.

Ren: Harriet. You know, James will shoot us? Like five of us, he’ll keep Ruby, Yang and Weiss  alive but the rest of us… yeah, not a chance.

Elm: He’s not wrong.

Harriet: ELM?!

Elm: Harriet, Qrow killed Clover yet James, didn’t bother to end his life when he heard what happened.  

Harriet: Well, shit. They win.

Winter: Good. You’re not entirely an idiot. Drop us down Marrow.

Marrow: Yes ma'am.

Winter: And Mr. Arc?

Jaune: Ma'am?

Winter: Are you-?

Jaune: No, trust me, not happening.

Winter: Understood.

Squeeze a warm coffee mug?

Constant hand cramps... how do I make them stopppp????

Ruby masters the ‘molecular level’ of her semblance but mostly uses it so she doesn’t have to redo her corset laces and buckles every day.

Jaune: fuck.

Ruby: JAUNE!

Jaune: oh im sorry let me say it louder. FUCK!

Dumb of them to assume they just used one.

The gang’s playing a drinking game where they ask questions and they all rate their answers by how crazy are. One of the questions were “the weirdest place I had sex before” and Yang thought her and Blake had that in the bag. They once did it in a changing booth at a mall.

.....keyword, she thought, because Pyrrha told them that she and Jaune once had sex in RWBY’s dorm when the team were in JNPR’s dorm for a sleepover. They snuck away during it and quickly did it before coming back.

What made this worse was that they refused to tell them which bed they used.

Definitely Cinder ‘Scared of Vulnerability’ Fall.

Which jaune ship is this?

Have you ever done Winter Knight headcanons? SFW and/or NSFW?

Send me a character/ship and I’ll tell you some headcanons

(please let me know if you want nsfw in is)

SFW

Ok, but like Jaune doing something clumsy, like accidentally tripping, or he gets lowkey humiliated in some way

And Winter chuckles at him

It’s more of a snort but Jaune still catches it

And he can’t help but go wide eye at how cute it was 

And Winter is embarrassed as hell

But Jaune loves it so much and desperately tries to get her to do it again

Winter does fencing practice with Jaune

And she manages to pin him down 

And Jaune’s heart is beating out of his chest

So he leans up to kiss her

And she is so flustered that she blasts him through a wall

NSFW

Winter wears heels and steps on Jaune

Jaune tied up and kneeling before her as she smirks down at him

Winter blushes at pda, but the moment they are behind closed doors, she is all about it

Mostly, because she’s in control of what goes on there and so can mentally prepare herself for it

Jaune doesn’t mind, he likes her being in control

They sometimes try to switch it up

Sometimes it works out well

Other times, she has to safeword out

It’s ok, they’ll just try again

She’s fine with blindfolds but cuffs can be too much

They use soft fabric, something she can tear out of

Team RASN: I know you said Jaune was likely to carry-bang whichever teammate(s) he ends up with, but at this point it seems more likely he's gonna sisterzone them and end up with Yang or something. It seems like the smol girls will have to make the first move.

Indeed it seems so, but Yang and Jaune are friends.

So far.

Yang would lie if she said she wasn’t interested in Jaune.

(I have no clue as to who would be making the first move.)

Councilman Arc AU: Juniper Arc had dealt with plenty of trouble caused by her eight children, but honestly, how is she meant to handle the first lady of Menagerie calling her up hoping to sneak a marriage arrangement over their children's heads?

Mama Arc had to deal with a lot of things over her life, particularly ever since she became a mother. The shenanigans of her children, worrying about her only son, especially once he all but fell into his role as councilman of Vale.

She could take solace that Salem promised her she would take care of him, that he would not be harmed.

Though she was not quite prepared for a call from Menagerie, from Kali Belladonna, no less!

“Ah, Mrs Arc, I presume,” the cat lady greeted her jovially, a twinkle in her amber eyes.

“Hello, Mrs Belladonna,” the mother of eight barely got out, blindsided and barely prepared for this. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Just call me Kali! And...well, I wanted to know if your son is single right now.”

Now the woman was alarmed. What did she want with her son?? “Yes, he is, but why do you ask?”

“I have a daughter. Single as well.”

Ah, that was a relie- wait.

“Are you suggesting what I think you are suggesting?”

“Maybe?” the First Lady of Menagerie replied playfully. “I do want to set the two up for a date.”

Mrs Arc was still suspicious. “For what reason?”

“Can you imagine the grandkitties?”

Oh.

Oh!

“You and I will get along ju~st fine,” the matriArc laughed.