I Fear Nobody Will Ever Be Able To Match The Dead Stare Standard Criston Has Managed To Set This Season.

one must imagine tantalus hungry

man i love physics

DNI if you:

Got it from Agnes

Got it from Jim

Got it from Louise (we all agree)

Got it from Harry

Got it from Marie

Got it from me (everybody knows!)

Got it from Daphne

Got it from Joan (who picked it up in County Cork, a-kissing the Blarney Stone)

Gave it to Sheila

Got it from Francois and Jacques (a-ha! Lucky Pierre)

Got it from Edith (who gets it every spring)

Got it from your Daddy (who just gives you everything)

Gave it to Daniel (whose spaniel has it now)

Your dentist even got it (and we're still wondering how?)

Got it from Agnes

Or maybe it was sue?

Or Millie

Or Billie

Or Gillie

Or Willy (IT DOESN'T MATTER WHO!)

Got it at the club

Or at the pub

Or in the loo

And fair warning, before you follow, if you will be my friend, then I might (mind you, I said "might"!) give it to you!

whenever they put Spock in all black it’s like. slut.

will wood songs be like

*funky piano* what gender am i

morality is stupid and doesnt exist

im so fucking drunk holy shit

we're all gonna die one day (^-^)

I haven't eaten for three days.

acab

cowboy time !!! oh and drugs ig

i should be in a psych ward

yoo remember when we thought the world was gonna end? me neither

who am i

I'm so sorry for not showing you emotional vulnerability and I really love you, and trust me I'm trying to make those repairs to show you more love, and I'm trying to improve myself.

cum on me please

vampire prettyboy wants to suck your blood TODAY!!!!(with your consent ofc)

rats all the rats i want to be a rat let me be a rat

You will actually sob nonstop for ten minutes.

hey dawg you see that culture over there yeah fuck that

wow im so gosh darn normal (im lying please help me)

reasons to kill caesar (in order of importance):

he slept with my mother

hes a dictator

Cassius doesn't like him.

william the conqueror: i shall take england for normandy and become its king

william the concurrer: i agree

If Hitchhiker's Guide was WOKE!!!!!!!

The Hitchhiker's GAY to the GAYlaxy

Arthur DEInt

aFORDable Housing Prefect

THEYphod SHEblebrox

Trillian is exactly the same but she actually has a role in the story and keeps her book-accurate appearance

Marvin the Paranoid ANDROGYNE

If fish had legs they'd partake in the ides of march I think