Im Going To Have A Stroke

Sophie. ⭐️

. . . bsky / cara / instagram / threads / twitter

My heart aches a little every time I see someone grieving a person who's still alive. Someone’s staring too long at a contact they’ll never text again. Someone’s walking a familiar route slower than usual, as if the past might catch up and hold their hand. Someone’s deleting pictures, only to check the trash folder ten minutes later.

Healing is cruel, isn’t it? It asks you to carry silence like it’s a gift. It asks you to remember without falling apart. It asks you to be okay with never getting an apology.

But mourn. mourn fully, if that’s what you need. Cry on the bathroom floor. whisper their name in the dark if it helps. just promise me you’ll learn the shape of your own hands again.

And next time, hold your own heart a little gentler.

So in English class we had to draw a scene from The Great Gatsby. After the drawings were done the teacher was showing them to the class, and one drawing was a pic of Gatsby reaching towards at the green light, but in the drawing Gatsby didn’t have hands. So my teacher starts saying something like how this picture has hidden meaning and portrays the helplessness Gatsby feels, and the kid next to me just casually says “I can’t draw hands.”

Someday I will have my own place. My world won’t be confined to my room. I will stumble sleepily through the house in the morning, opening the blinds. I will sit out in the backyard and look at the stars. I will go out whenever I want to. I will survive long enough to have that.

shout out to all the people who identify with gifted kid burnout syndrome who are probably just neurodivergent but werent diagnosed as a child, who used to devour books like it was nothing and never really understood why the protagonist would leave their cool fantasy world behind to go back home at the end of the story, and who are now extremely disappointed in reality and use escapism as their primary coping mechanism. how’s that bisexuality and deep-rooted anger at the school system going for you?

i love it when characters are unfair, actually. i love it when they’re uncouth and cranky and hypocritical, i love it when they have cognitive dissonances, i love it when they make good and bad choices for the wrong reasons. i love when they’re short to anger and hard to understand. i love it when they’ve destroyed themselves for nothing but can’t even see either part of it yet. i love it when they’re messy and selfish and bad at communicating. i love it when they get convinced of their own ego and stuck in a feedback loop regarding their own warped paranoia. i love it when characters actively make their lives unknowingly harder for themselves. i love it when characters don’t know they’re in a story. i love it when characters are like real people

They always say, Memento mori , remember you will die (as if we ever forget)

Death is loud, death shows up uninvited, sits at the table and pours you your tea.

But no one taught us how to live, how to hold hands like lifelines, how to kiss like there’s a clock ticking, how to laugh without guilt when the world’s still burning so I write this for you

Memento vivere.

Remember to live.

Touch your friends' faces like art, cry in the supermarket if you need to, take pictures of the sky, text first, say “I miss you” even if your voice shakes. The end is coming, sure...but that’s not the point. The point is you’re here. You woke up again. Your lungs worked. Your heart didn’t forget how to sing.

Memento vivere.

Carve it somewhere soft, say it like a spell, say it until it sticks.

#good omens s2 spoilers in the tags

#i know crowley couldve gone back with aziraphale

#but he didnt

#and also would they really have accepted him back

#in all likelihood it was just a bribe to get aziraphale to go back

#this post is so them coded

hey uhhh but fr the concept of fallen angels existing but risen demons being an impossibility is kind of a great summary of sin in christianity

name 2 foods with the same ingredients that otherwise bear no similarities whatsoever?