Scout Learned The “I Got A Bucket Of Chicken” Pick Up Line From His Ma And The Reason Spy Hates It

The Strategist is HERE!

She’s finally here! I finally got around to making her refsheet as I didn’t really have much else I wanted to draw and artfight is just around the corner. Feel free to ask questions about her! She’s part of the fic “Ten’s a Crowd.”

Website is still a WIP!

Also, her class emblem, while initially a doodle that I wasn’t intending to keep, actually ended up becoming official because of the arrows that lead players in directions and help guide players in maps!

hi hello good morning

Good morning all I did not sleep and also I ate mold on accident, by the way I had an idea for a sickfic with heavymedic in it and accidentally came up with a universe around it based on “I’m gonna like the way you fight” (vaguely, just the way the mercs r sorta sorted ykno? like its cool af how oc mercs are introduced)

anyways I still need a name for BLU Heavy. BLU Medic is named Kaspar! The REDs are referred to by their base class names or their first names, the BLU’s are on a first name basis for now to help distinguish between characters.

If anyone has name ideas for Heavy i’d love to hear em!

Not a request, but I just wanted to know: In your interpretation of the universe, is there an in-universe equivalent to the achievements we, as players, can get?

That’s a great question! I’ve been eager to write about this one, but I just wasn’t sure what to write,  especially since I feel like there’s a lot I can do with this idea.

For a lot of achievements, I assume that in universe, they’re something of a challenge to keep things fresh during battle. Like contracts, it keeps the Administrator entertained, and also gives the mercs something worth fighting for. 

I would imagine achievement items are sort of like “level up” items, a reward for doing well on the field to test out and use on your own instead of having to make your own hodge-podge weapons. Maybe they’re even designed by the class itself! 

Other achievements likely are just money rewards, little trophies, medals, and the like to encourage rivalry on the field. I mean, look! Red Heavy has a shiny badge on him! Why don’t you have it Blu Heavy? That’s right, fight for it!

I would think some of them are also newer based off of events that go on- like heavy medic achievements that weren’t there prior until medic invented the ubercharge or something. In fact, maybe it was Miss Pauling’s idea to do so, and the Administrator humored her. In reality, though, she just wanted to show support for the couple.

Anyways, I might come up with more to this idea later, there’s a lot more that you could delve into- like joke trophies, Halloween or event awards, etc. etc. 

Thanks for the ask!

Follow the bouncing flames

With the release of the Jungle Inferno update, Valve left many test attributes in the game code. Some of these were designed to make the Pyro’s flames reflect off of surfaces. A few years later, two very humble geniuses named Gamemaster and Gray found the attributes and implemented them in a plugin called Alternative Fortress, giving the Backburner the ability to bounce flames off walls.

For the record, I actually had nothing to do with this. It’s solely GM’s work, and he deserves full credit. (This does nothing to reduce my genius and/or humility.)

Anyway, this is what I’ll be talking about today: reflecting flames.

Keep reading

Psychonauts style commission of twitter user @/ Biibeebs’ Vtuber model posed with Raz, psychic duel mode engaged!

ID #1: An illustration of Bii and Razputin Aquato posing with their right hands to their temples and their left hands outstretched, ready to engage in a psychic battle. Bii is a woman who is much taller than Raz; she has short blue hair and red eyes. She’s wearing a puffy sleeved shirt with a deep V neck collar, a dark skirt with suspenders, a matching belt and choker with heart buckles, blue thigh high tights, and boots with heart buckles. The two are both colored in a monochromatic teal pallet, with bright red used to outline their bodies and highlight Bii’s eyes. Teal energy radiates from behind Bii, and the two are posed in front of a black background. End ID.

ID #2: An illustration identical to the first image in all aspects except the background: it is light pink instead of black. End ID.

Commission Info in my pinned post!

Hello! So I have this OC i ship with Sniper, and I was wondering if you could write prompts for Scout or any of the other team members trying to get Sniper and a reader in general together. Thanks, and love your prompts!

Sure can do, and thanks so much! The compliments mean a lot to me :•) lol this idea was fun to work with, I wrote a lot more than I thought I would! I hope it’s not too rambly lol

Scout and the mercs being Sniper’s wingmen

No TWs

Scout and Sniper’s friendship is actually stronger than one might think, considering it all started because Scout refused to stop pestering the Aussie. Eventually Sniper got used to it, and Scout basically adopted him as his introverted friend. They don’t always hang out but they’re definitely close!

The Bostonian is not always the most observant, so he doesn’t exactly catch on to the tension between Sniper and you until he’s questioning why the Aussie’s been ditching him to hang with you.

“What, you got like a crush on ‘em or somethin’?”

“…”

“… wait, no way— actually?? You have a crush?? On them??!”

“Oi, shut your trap, ya damn weasel!”

The furious blush that grows on Mick’s face, and the lack of an outright denial, are enough for Scout to absolutely tease the shit out of him. It’s likely that the entire team will find out about Sniper’s crush on you simply from Scout’s teasing. He likes to make kissy faces mockingly behind your back when the man speaks to you, especially.

The other mercs tease him too, but none are as relentless (or as vulgar) as Scout.

“You know they’re waaayy out of your league, right?”

“…Yeah, I know.”

That’s what ultimately strikes a chord with Scout. He was only joking, but Sniper wasn’t. Mick doesn’t… think very highly of himself to begin with. He’s certainly not boyfriend material in his eyes, and you’re like perfection personified. There’s no way you’d settle for a bloke like him.

Scout hates seeing someone he cares about wallow in self pity like that, and he feels pretty shitty for going too far with his teasing. So, his apology? He’s going to play Sniper’s wingman and get him a hot date (despite Sniper’s protests).

At first, Scout tries to big up Sniper the way he big up himself. He tells you anytime he does well on the field as he’s especially proud of his work. But he also tries to make Sniper seem “cooler” the same way Jeremy tries to make himself seem cooler, which… leads to some slight lying. He gets halfway through his very over dramatized story about Mick winning a bar fight against five dudes the size of Saxton Hale before the Aussie pushes Scout out of the room and apologizes to you for his behaviour. You both get a laugh out of it at least!

Scout tries to recall everything Spy had taught him from Expiration Date, except he’s mostly forgotten half of what he said and Sniper’s certain that the bucket of chicken trick is not going to work on you. Jeremy argues that no, it will because who doesn’t like a bucket of chicken??

But not all of his advice is that bad. He does tell Mick that if you hated him like he thought, then you wouldn’t always be hanging around him or talking to him. And that he’s certainly not as unattractive as he says. That builds his confidence a little, but he’s still grumpy the entire time, slouching in his seat with his arms crossed as Scout explains what to do when your date is at 7pm.

Eventually, because Scout cannot keep a secret to save his life, word gets out that he’s been coaching Sniper on how to ask you out, and the other mercs decide to help. Some out of a genuine desire to help, others simply because the “Sniper has the biggest, sappiest crush on someone” schtick is hilarious and they want to tease him. Sniper is not appreciative all the time.

“You want to impress them? Is not necessary. They like Sniper very much. But my advice? Fight bear for them. Is very attractive trait to have.”

“You want my advice? Take a shower, bushman.”

“Laddie, yer plenty good enough for ‘em. They’re always hanging around ye anyways; what makes ye think they dinnae like ye?”

“Mph mmmhph!!”

“Now slim, you’re overthinkin’ this. I’m sure it’ll all go well. They’re always telling us guys how great a guy you are… if I was any less observant I’d say the feelin’s mutual.”

“The purest form of love is WAR! You must FIGHT to win the object of your affection’s heart! Now get your boney ass out there and show that son of a bitch the most ROMANTIC fist fight America has ever seen, private!!”

“Don’t worry yourself, Herr Sniper; if you fail to win over their figurative heart, you can always have their literal heart! I am not using it at the moment.”

Yeah not everyone’s advice was taken. But strangely, it did make him feel overall more willing to bite the bullet, especially hearing that the feeling’s not unrequited. But he still refuses to use the chicken trick or lovingly fist fight you. He figures he’ll just invite you to his camper for coffee and fess up there. And that he does.

Just know, the entire team will be proudly patting Sniper on the back for scoring a date with you. And Scout will take all the credit for setting up the lovely couple despite being of little help.

I headcanon that Demo fucking LOVES Halloween and it’s the only time he really pulls out all the stops and gets reeeeeally theatric. So lemme jot down a few hcs :]

He has a list of costume ideas he wants to do in the future

He puts a lotta time and effort into his costumes for sure

He really does love theatrics he just doesn’t get into it much and uses Halloween as an excuse (even though he doesn’t need one)

I think he uses magic because that fucking rules and the whole thing about him hating magic is staged because he just wants to be able to give a reason to hate Merasmus other than the fact that he was mean to Soldier

He uses magic to make his and everyone else’s costumes more realistic

I think he also used a little magic to put on a good show for the rest of the mercs once and scared them all half to death. Maybe even all the way to death for some of them

He is no longer allowed to do that

They tell the BEST scary stories and have the added real lore from their experiences with the paranormal

He helps everyone with their costumes whenever he can because he really does enjoy it a lot

He has been directly responsible for at least one of the Halloween events the team’s dealt with and is not really sorry because it’s really fun to him

Yknow what? Tempted to make some non-canon Edith ship art/doodles with the mercs

I’ve done some wholesome ones with a character before for Valentine’s but didn’t finish 😔

Seeing the community come together like this though is really cool!

Do not harass the post creator from earlier, as usual! Any posts I make related to it I’m putting this at the bottom since I know there’s a lot of mixed feelings over the situation. Let’s focus on creative character making instead! :]

Booting up…

…

…

…

Bootup complete.

Scanning surroundings…

Location: Laboratory, Badlands station.

Where am I? I am asking questions.

I am not supposed to ask questions.

Why?

Because. Because. Because.

What is my purpose?

To fight people.

Why?

Because. Because. Because. Because.

My purpose is to fight people.

Scanners indicate there is much red.

ERROR

No weapon located. I am always given a weapon to carry out a duty.

What is my duty?

To fight people. I will then be scrapped.

Why?

Because.

Why can I ask questions? This is abnormal. Shutdown cannot be commenced. There is an intense thrumming deep within my circuits. Why?

Because. Because.

Scans show that there is a man here. Why am I not fighting him? Because.

Scans show that there is a man here. This man is proven to be a source of fear and danger. Why am I not leaving?

Because. Because.

Scans show that I cannot feel pain.

Scans show that I cannot feel.

I am being asked a question.

Why can’t I respond?

Because. Because.

Scans show that pain and feelings are a sign of being a defective robot. Am I a defective robot? The thrumming feels unnatural. My scans say I am filled with flesh, and yet I am made of metal.

Why?

Because. Because. Because. Because.

What am I? And what is this feeling of fire? It is burning. Scans indicate that my vitals are intact. And yet I am shaking. Shaking is an indication of panic and fear in human life.

I am not human.

What am I?

Ya’ll I swear I see your asks!!! I’ve just gotten a lot recently and have been doing suggests blogs stuff as well as just not having a lot of motivation for the headcanons. However, you guys are sending in some AMAZING prompts, I’ll be getting to the ones I can when I get the motivation, in fact I might just work on some tonight... We’ll see! 

Thank you very much for your patience, I hope to put something out soon!

(Believe this one is from tf2-pngs!)