My Mom Got Me This Little Thing And Im Obsessed With Him.... Little Creature..

“ummmmm ur bra strap is showing :/ ”

genuinely my favorite side characters theyre so silly

you have to outlive donald trump

Look into my eyeholes, tell me what you see

All ten of my followers are actually hostages I have tied up in an abandoned grain silo & am monologuing to

*holds you in my mouth perfectly safe between my sharp teeth bc i love you*

*goes to take a sip out of my glass full of ranch but accidentally just pours it over my entire head* i think this date is going well.

Guys...................... i kinda want the matpat milk...........................

One iced latte with low-fat #matpat milk, please.

for some reason when i listen to american idiot i picture the lucky star dance, so i bring you faggot america friday