Random Incorrect DEH Quotes I Found While Poking Around (Pt. One) :

While I'm on my uploading spree, consider: scruffy, sleepy, pre-shaven bedhead Marvin (and Whizzer absolutely simping over him)

IT'S FALSETTOS DAY IT'S MAY 27th IT'S MENDEL AND TRINA'S WEDDING IT'S THEIR 45th ANNIVERSARY I JUST DID THE MATH ON MY LEG IT'S OK THOUGH AHHHH I HATE MENDEL BUT ALSO I'VE BEEN EXCITED FOR HTIS FOR SO LONG IWUEHTKLSDBJGFG

I was looking for a picture of joe from slih for my discord pfp and holy shit 😰 who let the republicans into broadway. WHO

shit scared me oh my god

PART 11 BABY, BOOYAH!

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Evan: That's ridiculous! Jared doesn't have a crush on me!

Connor: Yes he does.

Alana: Yes he does.

Jared: Yes I do.

-

Jared: Where's Evan?

Zoe: Connor locked him in the bathroom...

Connor: Damnit, Zoe! You weren't supposed to tell him!

Jared: Nah, I'm cool with it.

-

Evan: I am darkness. I am power. I am your worst nightmare. I could kill a man in more ways than you can even imagine. I am the fury, I am the weapon, I am-

Zoe: A doll.

Alana: A cinnamon roll!

Jared: A sweetheart

Evan:

Evan: Stop it....

-

Connor: The hell is up with Kleinman? He's been laying there on the floor, for like, an hour?

Alana: He's just a little overwhelmed.

Connor: Oh really. From what?

Zoe: Evan smiled at him.

-

Jared: *Taps fingers on table*

Connor: *Taps back*

Alana: What are they... doing?

Evan: Morse code.

Jared: *Aggressively taps fingers on table*

Connor: biTCH YOU TAKE THAT FUCKING BACK-

-

Jared: Evan's gone! We can do anything. What does everyone want?

Miguel: I want Connor back.

Jared:

Jared: I've got, like, 12 dollars.

-

Alana: Jared isn't answering his phone.

Evan: I'll call.

Zoe: Me and Alana have both separately tried 6 times, what makes you think-

Jared: Hello?

-

Connor: The moon looks beautiful tonight.

Miguel: Mhmm.

Zoe: Should we tell them that it's just a tortilla we threw at the window earlier?

Evan: Ehh....

-

Connor: Your grounded.

Zoe: I'm... grounded?

Connor: Yes, your grounded.

Jared: We're gonna bury you until you learn your lesson.

Zoe: That's not how grounding works.

-

Jared: ARE YOU-

Zoe: Fucking.

Jared: KIDDING ME? THIS IS-

Zoe: Bullshit.

Alana: What are you doing?

Zoe: Evan took away Jared's swearing privileges, so I'm helping him out.

-

Alana: Why does Jared have a black eye?

Evan: He was saying 'Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me'.

Evan: So Connor threw a dictionary at him.

Connor: It was just to test a theory.

-

Looks like a cinnamon roll/Can actually kill you: Jared

Looks like they can kill you/ Is actually a cinnamon roll: Evan

Looks like a cinnamon roll/IS a cinnamon roll: Alana

Looks like they can kill you/CAN actually kill you: Connor

-

Zoe: Truth or dare.

Jared: Dare.

Zoe: Kiss the hottest person in the room.

Jared: Hey, Alana?

Alana: I-um-yeah?

Jared: Could you move, Evan's right behind you?

-

Jared: You have friends and I envy that.

Evan: You can share my friends???

Jared: *Looks at Alana and Connor*

Jared: Yeah, I don't want those.

-

Connor: Hey bitch, do you love Evan?

Jared: I guess, yeah.

Connor: HA! Take that, Zoe. You owe me one hundred bucks, I told you he was gay!

Jared: Dude, everyone loves Evan? You should have asked if I was in love with him.

Connor: I thought that was implied.

Jared: ...

Connor: ...

Zoe: Connor, I think you just earned yourself one hundred dollars.

-

Evan: *Sits down*

Alana: This bench is freshly painted :)

-

Evan: Oh my god, I think I like Jared.

Connor: Congratulations, you are officially the LAST one of us to figure that out.

Connor, turning his head: Hey, Miguel! I won the bet!

-

Miguel, looking at Evan and Zoe: They make a cute couple, don't they?

Jared, annoyed with Zoe and Evan at this point: They certainly are standing next to each other...

-

SPOOKY QUOTES!

Connor, high asf: Trick or YEET?

Child: Uh... yeet?

Connor: *Throws the child*

-

Jared, texting: So, what do you want to be for that halloween party?

Evan, texting: Yours :)

Jared:

Jared: Yeah, that would be pretty scary.

-

Alana: I thought you were setting up decorations for halloween?

Jared: I am.

Alana: Your just hanging up pictures of Connor.

Jared: You said you wanted scary decorations.

-

[In a horror movie... phone rings]

Evan: Yes?

Killer: I can see you.

Evan:

Killer:

Evan:

Killer:

Evan, panicking: Do I look good?

-

Evan: Guys, we're out of candy.

Jared: Wha... but there's only been, like, three kids so far?

Evan: Yeah, but this little girl told me she loved me and I panicked and just ended up giving her everything.

-

Evan: So.. what's your type?

Jared: Most likely someone who I'm not constantly on the same page with, who I can sort of argue with playfully and who likes talking about their interests. And like, their favourite season is spring, and their favourite holiday is Halloween, and their cute.

Evan: Oh, that sounds like me.

Evan: Too bad I'm not cute.

Jared:

Jared: Did I mention stupid?

Evan: Uh... no?

Jared: Well I meant to. Just making sure.

-

Jared: I'm not doing too well.

Jared: I have this headache that comes and goes.

Evan: *Walks in*

Jared: Oh, there it is again.

-

Jared: What are you, five?

Evan: Yeah,

Evan: Five heads taller than you.

Jared:

Evan:

Jared:

Evan: I am so sorry, please don't kill me.

-

Alana: Great work with the halloween decorations! Where did you get the fake skulls from?

Connor: F a k e ?

-

Miguel: It's totally fine you didn't dress up for halloween.

Connor: Oh no, I'm dressed up as a straight person.

Evan: *Walks in wearing the same thing as Connor*

Connor, looking at Jared: See?

-

Miguel: What should I be for halloween?

Connor: My boyfriend.

-

Alana: Jared! What is this?

Jared: My to-do list.

Alana: Oh, that's great! I'm so glad that your starting to-

Alana:

Alana: Jared, this just says 'Evan'.

!!!!!

the curves the lighting the face shapes the expressions the poses I LOVE YOU I LOVE THIS

from the requests, baseball game!! this was actually so fun i got to be all loose and sketchy about it good time must say

marvin with a boston accent, reblog if you agree

I pretend I do not hear

@weirdo-with-a-potato we've officially subjected ourselves to neverending catgirl hell

P.S.

christian borle I am so fucking sorry oh my god why did I spend so many hours on this PLEASE FORGIVE ME

It’s weird how everyone hating you when you’re nine years old still affects your self esteem when you’re 26 like yeah nobody came to my birthday party but that was like 17 years ago why is it stopping me from going to a gay bar

yes all my favorite characters are desperate to be loved. no i don’t think that says anything about me