System Ask Game

Dude I need claws SO bad. Except I need prosthetics to be really sturdy, so I can actually like. Use them for shit. Like I wanna be able to wear them to help me climb or claw at stuff or whatever I need them for. But people only make like plastic or foam or resin claws. It's not STRONG enough. I need like. IRON claws. STEEL claws. Claws I can climb trees and rock faces with. Claws that could kill a man if I wanted them to. It's a fucking TRAGEDY these aren't a thing, and I swear to God I'm about to learn metalworking just so I can make myself a suitable set.

We are the Dunedain, the rangers, the guardians

General about the system (though we use the term crew these days):

We’re queer. The most common pronoun set in our system is he/him. The only person I know who gets bothered by he/him pronouns is a little who isn’t allowed on this account without supervision. This is an endo safe account.

The earliest memory we have of a headmate was when the body was nine (the body is now in its early twenties). We have trauma but we’re not sure if we’re traumagetic or not. There’s like, fourteen of us with simply plural accounts? I know there Are more but I don’t know much about them.

Bodily we’re in our early twenties but there’s a big range between individual crew members.

Captain (alternate title for host) and Council Leader: Jay (he/him)

I was dragged kicking and screaming into being plural, but I’ve realized that every time I flip out and suppress it doing so harms me and everyone else, so I’m trying not to do that. It’s harder sometimes than others but my mental health is so much better when I’m calm about things. I tend to be front stuck and it’s hard to tell if I have amnesia or if the blanks in my day are just adhd.

I don’t like dealing with syscourse, I stay away from it and will block people who harass us because it’s really unhelpful to us.

First Mate and Other Council Leader: Shekel (he/him)

(Still Jay typing) I’ll have him fill out a bio at some point, but for now I’ll just say that he’s one of our most common fronters, identifies as alterhuman, is a protector, and is the most helpful and wonderful joint-council leader I could have asked for. <3

Ex-persecutor: Travis (he/him)

I wasn't going to mention him by name, but he wrote himself a bio, so I figured I'd link that here. In fact, he might be writing this right here. No one will ever know for certain >:)))

Others:

We have formally instated a Council of Nine (yes it started as a silly joke, but actually it’s gonna be helpful).

It includes:

Jay, Shekel, Travis, an age-slider, a caretaker, a little, our longest present headmate, our most extroverted member, and the closest thing we have to a gatekeeper (we think. Their role is still a bit uncertain).

Important decisions need to be made by at least a few council members, and communications on here are unlikely to involve headmates that aren’t on the council.

by odwyer_sio9

reclusive child with elaborate imagination and maladaptive daydreaming to plural teenager who doesn’t identify with thier own body anymore pipeline is unfortunatelg real

Our Splitting Experience

hi! i figured id write about my experience with splitting as someone who struggles with blurred dissociative barriers and difficulty with headspace connections

cw/tw for splitting talk and such below the break

so for me, when i split, it starts with extreme dissociation.. like really bad.. and when i dissociate my eyes essentially unfocus and its nearly impossible for me to refocus them.. then comes a nightmarish headache, and i just need to sit down and try to stay calm

now this might just sound like serious dissociation or like a panic attack or whatever else others may connect this to, but the difference for me is that i start to hear the new alter's name echoing through my head, in some weird way.. idk how to explain it other than by saying that.. it slowly gets more severe, and sometimes those echoes will have other information included, but the dissociation will reach a peak as well as the echoes before it all just fades away.. it leaves me exhausted and drained, and its very unpleasant.. from there, the alter will have some kind of rudimentary form, and over a short time theyll fully develop.

keep in mind this is just my experience but i wanted to share it in case anyone else feels that way.. :p

so thats all! - 🌹

In Sys Qoute #1

"I'm going to beat your fucking ass"

"I hope you yaba daba do motherfucker"

*turns on phone intending to update front in simply plural*

*opens tumblr*

5 minutes later...

*closes tumblr, puts away phone*

"Oh wait I was going to update front omg"

Trying to figure out if a couple guys I know of are headmates or if they’re just OCs. Like yeah, they come with their own Vibes, but is that really enough to go off of? I think one fronted earlier but only for like ten seconds so who knows really?? And the other is just a Feeling I’ve had off and on since I was a kid and I put the feeling into an OC and recently I found a journal entry where I(?) was calling myself by his name… but I don’t know… halp….

Shout out to headmates who are sourced but aren't introjects!

This could mean kin identities or even just deciding that you are/look like/are sourced from a thing you like now, just because you said so!

Maybe you are an introject and decided to have another source.★

I've been thinking about trauma and what may qualify, and I'm starting to realize that raising animals probably did contribute to the trauma we have.

(tw explicit animal death/killing, general gross/gore warning)

I remember watching a family friend crack open eggs that hadn't incubated fully to hatching when I was five or younger, and she explained that it's just the way things are on a farm sometimes as I watched those soggy underdeveloped chicks lay still on the straw.

When I was older one of my goats had a stillborn kid - but it had been dead long enough to rot in the womb, and its corpse was literally falling apart as we pulled it out.

I raised a couple batches of turkeys that I loved so, so much, even though I knew we'd butcher them. I named them and carried them around and spent so much time with them they were incredibly docile. One turkey from the second batch I raised got injured - I think he broke his wing or something? - and the bigger tom that was with him was doing what turkeys do and trying to bully him to death. He was in so much pain, and while I agreed to help my parents butcher him for meat, I asked that one of them kill him because I hate killing animals. Unfortunately, mom decided to wait until later in the day when it would be more convenient to butcher him. When I found him suffering in his pen hours after I thought my parents had put him down, I got my sharpest knife and sobbed as I pinned him down and slit his throat.

I have so, so many stories like those that I am starting to acknowledge qualify as traumatic for a tenderhearted kid, but I feel like I shouldn't be traumatized by them. It's the way things are on a farm, after all. It's what happens. It's how life goes. So many of my animals died because I owned a bunch of animals for a long time and it's the way things go. Was I really not strong enough to handle it? Surely I should have been able to. Surely it's just the way things are, am I really so weak as to let those facts of the circle of life hurt me?

This is what life is. Why did it break me?