Soil-just-needs-water-to-be - Dylan

Chapter 13

Word count : 2419

Mention of drugs , it’s cute and angsty still and supportive and just fluff

Matty's POV

Once I write the text I read it over to make sure I didn't miss anything out and then send it knowing an answer will never come is still upsetting but it's also grounding knowing I can say anything and not be corrected or told to think about things. I spend sometime reading over things I've sent since she passed it's bringing tears to my eyes again. I don't quite know how long I'd been lying there, but i here his little voice come from the screen

"That doesn't look like sleeping to me love", he's looking a little bleary eyed and confused "are you okay ?"

I look up at him and drop my phone down onto my pillow like a child who'd been caught up after bedtime chuckling a little bit at myself "I'm alright I was just reading some stuff", I smile at him to confirm I'm alright.

"What we're you reading, you looked a little upset", pulling the duvet around himself more he rubs his eyes and tries to get everything into focus again.

"Just old texts I sent to Janey , I sent her a text just telling her about you , I've been doing it a-lot since she passed it helps a lot", I pull my pillow under me better so I can lay right. I feel better than before It must be wearing off and I'm much more settled.

"About me , why ?", he looks so young right now, so gorgeous , I know I've said it before but I'll keep saying it's because it's true.

"I was telling her about this guy I met and how lovely he is and how much he helps me", fuck I'm blushing again, my face is warm from the blush, I can't deny it though he constantly makes me blush, the idea of being able to maybe love him one day keeps playing in my mind it's weird.

"I'm lovely? , I'm sorry Matty , are you good bruv ?" , man even his sarcasm is cute , but seriously I could talk about him all day , he then begins to laugh and sits up a little "it's funny though"

"What's funny?"

"I was just telling my friends about this guy I'd met , how interesting I find him , even though I don't know him all the well but he's really handsome" , he's blushing too now and seems a little nervous with this revelation, he doesn't need to be I do find him lovely and VERY attractive "I wasn't lying earlier when I said your fit"

"Neither was I" , letting out a sigh I'd been holding without realising, I switch on my bedside light now feeling alot better that before, I feel like a 14 year old teenager again just falling for someone without even knowing them it's stupid " I really like having you around"

"I like having you around too, I wish I could I’m hug you right now", he still seems shy I could easily change that one day

"That would be amazing if I'm honest just to hold someone for a minute", I want to I really do

We get talking for a while a lot into the night talking about the things we like and don't like , stories of friends and funny anecdotes, he tells me the story of when he broke his wrist.Where laughing at it , I'm laughing that hard my stomach hurts and my eyes are streaming. This guy is amazing. I swear I've never felt this close to someone before other than the boys and Janey . I tell him the story of Ross when we were 13 smoking for the first time how high he got and ate basically everything in my fridge and how mad my Mum got because he ate what she had bought for dinner. The story of when my brother was born and how scared I was because I thought I'd break him but now we're literally the most inseparable brothers could be.

"You really love everyone in your life dont you Matty?, you hold them so close", Since starting the conversation we'd both woken up a lot and started becoming more animated but I"ve learned how much this kid talks.

"I love em all there all amazing, you should meet them one day", I swear one day I'll make sure he meets them

"You mean you actually wanna meet me?", how is he still unsure of that I want him around.

"Your an actual twat G , yes I want to meet you", he's smiling like an actual numpty again as am I. I don't really know if I'd ever stop smiling while he's talking to me. He really does make me feel safe "Can I tell you something George , please don't go mad at me though."

"That's ominous , but yes go ahead you can tell me anything", I really hope this doesn't push him away but people are always telling me to be honest, so im going to be honest the most honest I've ever been. Not even my mother knows.

"Well ...I think I might have a drug problem". My face is red right now but not from blushing this time more so nerves and how scared I am of being sincere and honest.

"I have an inckling that you don't mean weed do you ?" , I can tell he's listening because he's looking at me so much worry in his eyes and he's paying attention but he doesn't seem cross or mad so I keep going.

"No I mean , cocaine , I used to only do it at parties or when I was out with my mates , not that they ever would there amazing , but lately it's more often and it makes me feel better about things and stops me thinking for a while" I stop to take a breath then continue "and I know I shouldn't rely on it , and it's probably the worst thing I could turn too but it helps it really does"

"Matty slow down, you don't have to explain to me okay,I'll help you stop if that's what you want , is that what was wrong earlier ?",Im so glad he's not mad , I would if it were the other way around and I was talking to me but that's why he's so different, and he's so understanding. I didn't think he'd be this calm but I'm glad he is. "Like I knew something was off about earlier but I didn't know want you to be upset with me"

"Yeh in all honesty,after singing that song , I knew it would take me hours to calm down". It's weird being honest and not being pushed away or getting in trouble. I don't know how easy it will be to stop but if he really means what he said I'll try for him.

"I'm sorry love, how does it make you feel", he's now sat fully up and trying to find something I don't know what but I'm sure I'll find out eventually. I don't know how it makes me feel really it just empties me out and calms me, settling me down per say

"It just for lack of better words makes me feel nothing, just clears my brain of everything that's making me feel out of place", The room is starting to get a little warm so I remove my jumper just sitting in a T-shirt and my boxers, I know being honest is good but it really doesn't feel that good sometimes

"Well , I'm going to help you feel that way when you need it but what I need from you is to tell me when you feel like you need it and please for the love of god don't disappear" . As I remove my jumper I can see him eyeing me up a little even though he's trying to be serious, but I can't help but blush at the little twinkle in his eye as my T-shirt rides up a little.

"I'll do my best, I won't go anywhere that I can promise but it might be a little harder to do the other thing , but I'll try", I wanna play with him a little I get up out of the bed and place my laptop on the desk at the other side and take off my T-shirt then come to the desk sitting down and getting my Xbox remote putting my headset around my neck looking like I'm about to put them on I can see him blush again and he's slightly fidgety. I don't want to take it to far it would just be a little weird this early on but I can guarantee he loved it , trust me I know how to flirt.

He coughs a little to get his voice back " That's , that's okay so long as you know I'm here" , he's still bright red and his pupils are still blown wide "I know where having a serious conversation right now but your really handsome"

"I am , am I?" , I smile at the screen and start playing with the headset wires rolling it through my hands , I can see myself in the corner of my screen my hairs a mess and my shoulders and top half of my torso is showing I look a mess , slightly skinny as my coller bones are protruding and my arms are like twigs. But I can't deny I'm still pretty

"Yeh", I know he's young but I don't know if he knows how to flirt but you know what he's cute so I'll deal with it.

"Wanna play something, we can play fifa if you want ?"

"Sure , that would be cool". I run over to get my remote and come back and he's already up getting everything prepared, I wait till he's ready before starting a game "what team you gunna be but you can't be no shit second league team"

"Ahh young warrior you know nothing , I'm playing as Newcastle United and if you say anything this game ain't gunna happen" , I pick my team and I see he picks Sunderland I swear it was just to annoy me , rival teams and all "I swear you did that on purpose"

"Maybe I did" he chuckles to himself and the game begins.

The first half is played really poorly by both of us, none of our teams are doing what we wish they'd do, My goalie is honestly the only player playing right. I know I'm controlling it but nope it's not my fault none of them are playing right. I've netted at least two goals to his one. We went silent as the second half approached. The second half was alot better everyone is cooperative and Ive managed to score another two goals, Im really doing George's head in, he's really trying but I've managed to accidentally injure two if his plays causing one of mine to get a red card so we are both down team players but by the time the end of the game comes he is really not winning. I cheer to myself when I do win trying not to wake everyone up in the house as it's a little late and I know my mum will tell me to go to sleep if she hears me up

"See I told you I'd beat your ass", he's sat on the other end of the screen looking like a petulant child because he didn't win , and if he didn't look so cute I'd be totally turned off right now so he's lucky

"Nah mate I swear you cheated, I demand a rematch" , he's also moved over to his desk for better setting and game play action.

"Sure but watch me just beat you again , one more game and then bed because it's late and we said we'd go to bed hours ago ?"

"Sounds good to me love"

We start up another game same teams as before just to keep it mutual, he manages to score within the first five minutes.he cheers to himself which makes me smile. I really have to show I mean business and I won't just let him win because he's cute, I tackle his defenders just before they get into my goal line and break way past his centre mid player passing it to my stricker and score and amazing goal. I swear if I could play this well in real life I could be a footballer. The second have breezes by 1 - 1 each not to bad but the second half we both up our anti he scored a few more times and i equalize there's two minutes of extra time which causes me to score my last one just before the game ends "fuck he's just in time"

"Fuck you man", he's smiling though and he looks like he had a good time, we're both calm and in a world of our own. Just at that my mum come into my room wearing her dressing gown and her glasses are at the end of her nose like she'd put them on hastily "Matty love it really is time you should be in bed , tell your friends your going offline now and try get some sleep okay you've got school" I turn in my chair and smile at her before she leaves "sorry mum"

George and I have a good little giggle about it but we know we do need to go to bed. So we turn the game off as we both get settle into bed. Placing my laptop onto my bed next to me and I watch him get back into his getting comfortable and trying to stay warm "I really do wish you were here Georgie". I smile then get comfortable myself

"Me too love , but let's try to sleep again yeh, time for shush now" he moves his hand up to the screen like he's trying to ruffle my hair "good night love"

I smile at his cheesy little action but feel those butterflies in my stomach that people say they get when they like someone "goodnight darlin" I turn off my bedside lamp and really fall asleep this time hoping I do have good dreams.

IM ACTUALLY IN LOVE GUYS

ARGHHHHH

🥰🥰🥰

Going to be posting the videos and pictures of what I got to far from transmt

My friend is sending them over so there all taking a while 😂

Might be getting the fic on archive sooon hopefully ❤️

ALTHOUGH DOES SOMEONE WANNA HELP ME WITT THE LATEST CHAPTER CUZ IM A MONTH BEHIND AND JUST CANT GET IT GOING ???

I think imma post a few fave pics of my Husband (George Daniel 😂)

❤️❤️❤️❤️ The Amount of Love I Have for This Man is Unreal

Part 15

Word count 3075

There’s a little bit of Ross in this one so if your a Ross girlie/guy your man’s in this has a slight POV and I think it’s quite sweet mention of anxiety and drugs again in this one

Matty's POV

The walk to school was pleasant to say the least, My headphones were in ,the sky was blue and there was nary a car in sight not much to complain about on this fine morning other than the pollution in the air affecting the Ozone layer. Green house gasses and Carbon emission affecting climate change but what can a 17 year old boy do about that really. I decide to wait at the park for Ross he'll most likely want to walk with me. I pull out a cigarette while I wait lighting it in-between my lips while I guard it from the wind, I let the nicotine run through my veins and relax right into it. Ross doesn't take to long to turn up, rucksack flung over his shoulder and one shoe still needing tied. "Bloody hell, what happened to you?", He looks down right dishevelled,

He leans over tying his shoes "Stayed up last night talking to John and I slept in, missed my alarm didn't I." mans stressing, he really thought hed be late. It's kinda funny seeing Ross in this state usually it's me. The more important thing here is that he's stayed up talking to someone. That's never a Ross thing to do

"What really !?" I pat him on the back and pull his bag strap onto his other shoulder for him. His bag weighs a fuckin ton what the hell. I look at him he looks more presentable and pat down his shirt a little bit though and straighten his tie "There you go lad, looking loads better", We sit down on the swings next to each other and I hand him a cigarette and a lighter he probably needs it right now. I take another drag out of mine "on a serious note though , I do need to tell you something". I can't look him in the eye , I'm nervous about telling him what happened last night because I know he'd be upset that I didn't tell him sooner, I contemplated telling him how I felt , I contemplated texting him but I just couldn't.

"What's up Lad ?", although I'm not looking at him, avoiding all eye contact with him , boaring into the ground with my eyes. I exhale the smoke that I didn't realise I was holding. I can still feel his eyes on me "Matty you can tell me anything you know ?."After inhaling the last of my cigarette I throw it on the ground and squish the reminisce with my foot now my hands are free and I don't know what to do with them. They immediately go to my hair curling the ringlets carefully.

"I did something last night" my hands are now between my knees I'm crushing them together , it's an anxious tick I suppose something I do when I'm scared "it was stupid", although I really want to tell him I can't bring myself to say the words. I'm stalling .

"Come on lad, what happened ?". I was hyper aware of everything going on around me and how anxious I was getting. I was sweating and it wasn't the least obvious thing.

"I used again" , my hands were clammy and I still couldn't look in his direction never-mind at him, I know it's just Ross and he'd never judge me but everything around me is spinning again and my vision is going blurry and I feel like I am about to throw up . It's just nerves.

"Shit man ,I'm so sorry , why?, what caused it ?, did something happen?, why didn't you call me ?" . That's so many questions in one go , how am I supposed to answer, shit everything is going crazy and my head, it hurts , I'm dizzy and I don't want to be here having this conversation right now.

"It's a long story....I had a meltdown really...George and I were talking about music ...he threw a track together in his class yesterday and really wanted me to hear it and uh I wanted to show him that I knew what I was talking about and he wanted to hear something I'd done so I made the error of singing 102 didn't I....and everything just spiralled" . It all came out all at once . I didn't plan on telling him the whole story but when I started I couldn't stop. Word vomit comes to mind. Still no chance of it stopping there though my mind is just raving " and and ...I had forgotten that Corey had given me gear from the party we went to the other week , I was trying to be good so I didn't take it ...but I found it when I was cleaning up ....and singing 102 again without Janey just hurt and ....".I felt Ross' hand on my bank and his arm snake around me in a tight hug trying to comfort me as the tears start rolling down my face

"Hey hey ...it's okay Matty, I understand, it's alright" , He held me close rubbing his hands down my back in a comforting kind of way , I'm now soaking his shirt with my tears there's no way that it's going to subside anytime soon "Can we just go back to yours for a bit" I mumble into his shirt. I don't quite know if he heard me because he makes no effort to move. He just held me. After a few minutes more he pulled away and guided my chin to look at him "we can go back to mine, my mum won't mind, I really don't think school is the right place for you right now, it'll be okay". I was upset , more so angry at myself . I had really been looking forward to school this morning somewhat excited to maybe have a full day in lessons but now my head was throbbing and everything was telling me there was no way that was gunna happen.

"I'm sorry" , Ross is still holding on to me while we walk back to his , the guilt I feel that he's missing school is bubbling in my stomach, " You don't have to miss school you know?, not for me" . The walk to his isn't to long, he lets go of me for a second to unlock his front door and he lets me go in first and follows close behind. Once I've dropped my rucksack into his room I slip into the bathroom because I'm feeling super nauseous. Ross tentatively follows behind me "please, don't come in".

"I'll just wait out here okay , and just call for me if you need me" . He lets me close the door and if I know Ross which I do he will literally just be sat at the other side of the door. With that knowledge I rest my back against the door and slide down, and try to avoid looking at the light so I can calm down. I slip my glasses off and place them on the floor beside me and force my knuckles into my temples to try and ease the throbbing in my head "Ross do ave any more painkillers by any chance?"

"Yeh there in the cupboard above the sink", His voice is soft and quiet from the otherside, I must have gotten up from my place on the floor to quickly because as I rise the nausea comes flowing through me tenfold causing me to rush over the the toilet and heave into it making a disgusting grumble echo through the room. "Matty are you okay ?". It comes in waves a few seconds apart three more times. The toast from breakfast swiftly making an appearance. My skin is sticky the room smells rancid and my eyes are feeling that familiar sting again. Here I go crying again for god sake. Once I'm sure I have finished I lean against the cool tile on the wall behind me , loling my head back.

"I know I asked you not to come in but I've changed my mind..." before I've even finished my sentance Ross is in the room and by my side, I curl up into a ball and fall against his shoulder

"I hate this Ross , I hate this sooo much , I was in such a good mood this morning and now here I am crying on your bathroom floor not even an hour later , I don't understand any of this" , my tears are flowing at a rapid pace now and I've lost all the ability to stop them, my bottom lip is trembling. "I can't keep doing this"

"What going on up ere ?", he tapped my head in between my eye brows indicating that he's asking what's going on my head.

"Everything , Everything is going on, I'm not okay , I'm just...so...emotional....I feel unstable in my own head" .I'm clinging onto Ross for dear life right now like he's going to disappear if I let go or I'm not careful "I....I feel lost"

"Can you tell me do you know when this all started Matty, like when exactly did the first meltdown happen ?, was anyone there to help?" . I can feel his arms wrapped around me , his warmth is trapping me in this feeling of closeness and understanding. It's safety isn't it.

I speak into his shoulder "I don't quite remember when it all started but I know I was at work when it first happened , I was at work and um it was a particular busy shift and everything was just getting to much, It started with just a headache but then like 20 minutes later just everything , everything hurt and I couldn't see and the room was spinning , my hands where shaking, they sent me home and mum looked after me?". I really did think talking about it would be a lot harder but something about being in Ross' arms make it a lot easier.

"How does it make you feel after", his hands are playing with my hair he knows it calms me down. Lightly tugging on the curls running them through his fingers

"I just feel tired and a bit twitchy", I still have a slight headache but talking about it is really starting to help a small bit. "Could you get those painkillers for me lad ?".

He does so, standing up and filing through the cupboard looking for the painkillers , filling a glass and picking up my glasses from the floor, handing me them. I thank him as he sits right back where he was pulling me into him "Do you want to go lie down then , Ill ring your mum and let her know where you are so she doesn't worry ?"

"That would be nice, thank you".After necking the the pills and water and putting my glasses back on , Ross pulls me up to my feet. Guiding me to his room, my legs are are still shaky but Ross is doing a great job right now. He lays me down on his bed and sits next to me. He's only got a single bed so there's not much room for us both but I pull him close to me while he's here so he doesn't leave.

"Try to get some sleep then lad", I close my eyes and concentrate on his breathing, I know he won't call my mum until I'm asleep since I don't like it when people talk about me. He turns the TV on and plays it on low friends is playing, I can feel him slightly shake every-time they tell a joke, he gets a good laugh. I fall sleep listening to the sound of his breathing against my ear.

~~~~~

Ross POV

Once I feel like Matty's asleep, I find my phone in my pocket and fire his mum a text.

"Good morning Denise, It's Ross , which you know I guess obviously but yeh , I don't know if your free to talk or anything but just so your aware Matty is here with me , you probably got a message from the school saying he's not there but I just thought I'd let you know he's here with me and not to worry"

"Good Morning sweetheart, I did see a message from the school but I have had a minute to check it over , what happened , he seemed happy this morning when he left?"

"I don't really think it's my place to say he should really tell you himself but I'd just recommend speaking to him or just keeping a closer eye on him for a little while , There's alot going in his head right now"

"I have realised that but you know how he is just avoiding us as much as he can , but thank you for letting me know sweetheart , I'll be round to pick him up after work, please just make sure he gets something to eat and keeps hydrated, I'll let his dad know"

"You don't need to thank me, I'm just looking out for him , he's asleep right now , I'll get him some lunch when he wakes up"

I put my phone back in my pocket because I'm not sure how to continue the conversation I've never been good at talking with peoples families without them around even though Denise is like another mother to me. I just stay in my room with Matty to keep a close eye on him. I've never seen this kid so quiet, it's miracle trying to keep this lad still for longer than five seconds. I smile to myself because finally seeing him look peaceful for the first time in so long really pulls at my heart strings. The TV in the background drowning as I just watch him sleep keeping an eye out for any signs that he's having a nightmare or something.

He's been asleep for nearly an hour now , he's laying next to me I can feel him start to get a little restless slightly thrashing about not much but it's still noticeable. "Hey , Matt , shhhh , it's alright I'm ere , Matty it's alright". His grip on me tightened and I don't know if I should wake him but I don't want him to be in distress so I shake him a little "Matty your alright, I don't know if you can hear but everything is okay" . At that his eyes open a little and he squints as his eyes get used to the room around him and he pulls himself into me guarding his face from the light seeping through the window. "Are you okay?"

"It's...it's to bright, the curtains can you close them" , I get up slowly to close the curtains and Matty sits up pulling his knees to his chest and the heels of his hands pressed into his eyes

"Matty , stop your going to hurt your eyes mate, you've got to be softer". I'm next to him again in an instant pulling his hands away and holding his face so he's looking at me "Is that better?"

He's looking at me with those eyes of his, so apologetic for no reason, he looks so young "I'm sorry , my eyes just always really hurt after a headache...like there just really sensitive"

I'm still holding his face, he's till looking right into my eyes "it's okay Matt , why you apologising, were you having a nightmare"

"I don't think so, I think I was just panicking in my sleep if that's even possible"

"I think that can happen you know", You know I don't actually know if it is possible but feels like it could be and it definitely seemed like that's what was happening. "Oh uh I haven't mentioned , your mums coming to pick you up after work"

"Okay , fuck she's probably gonna take me out for a drive somewhere so I'll talk to her , I don't wanna go out I just wanna be at home" , he lets his legs go straight again and rest his head against the headboard

"Why don't you want to go out ?". I'm sat next to him with my legs crossed playing with a singular thread coming off the pocket of his trousers, "doesn't it help to talk to your mum ?, she used to take you out on drives when you were younger didn't she to help you talk more ?"

"She did yeh , she used to take me out a lot when I had things going on , or when I was anxious as a kid like when I was anxious to tell her things, it did help, I think I'm just scared to tell her what I did, she'll be so upset"

"She'd be upset but she'd understand and she would never be mad at you , you know , I know your mum she loves you , just wants what's best for ya". I really hope he gets the help he needs seeing him so fragile and scared is weird he's always been so confident in himself , we'll not always he was always a little shy as a kid but since high school he really grew into himself and became such a light in everyone's world and watching that light dim has just been so upsetting lately. "Do you think they might be panic attacks or Anxiety attacks or something"

"Maybe , it's just everything sets it off that's what bothers me is that I don't know what's going to set me off everyday because there's always something"

"We'll we can work it on them, see what helps you calm down , and please talk to your mum , you never know how much it might help ya" . I pull a cigarette from my pocket and steal Matty's lighter from his blazer pocket "want one ?"

"Sure", I offer him one of mine as I light mine, we sit in silence for a bit as I ponder what to do next because I really just want to make sure he's settled before his Mum arrives which might make him open up more.

"What do you wanna do , watch tv , fifa or just sit for a bit", picking up my remote I look through what's on Netflix "if you want the TV you can pick"

"I don't mind , we can just watch whatever" , we finish our cigarettes and he immediately pulls out a joint "this might calm me down"

"Thats alright I'll just put some music on"

And that we do and we smoke until his mum turns up. Just around the back of 1

The 1975 Ask Game

Safe to say I got a little bored so I made this

🖊️ favourite lyric & why

🎵 favourite song & why

📽️ favourite interview

🎤 favourite live performance

💿 favourite album

🗣️ favourite matty quote

🎸 favourite guitar solo

🎼 favourite baseline

🥁 favourite drum solo / fill

🎷 favourite sax solo

❤️ favourite main member & why

💜 favourite wap (wife/partner)

🩷 favourite tour member

💫 favourite "the 1975" intro

💙 favourite photo of ross

🤍 favourite photo of hann

🖤 favourite photo of matty

💚 favourite photo of george

🤝🏼favourite song featuring another artist

📓 favourite fan fic

🛋️ favourite show you've attended

🌟 your personal favourite memory / moment during your time as a fan

blurb ideaa for george so gigi is out with a boy and she runs into george and he is in protective uncle mode hahah he’s like wait until i tell your dad

gigi is maybe fifteen when she starts showing a proper interest in dating. she's had little crushes and maybe a sweet little first kiss or two but honestly was too busy just doing her own thing to be that bothered. but she's been seeing this guy for a bit now and she thinks she really likes him. apart from all the questions swirling in her head, am i old enough, does he like me, what's it like being someone's girlfriend, the biggest one in her mind is, how is she going to tell her dad. she had a boy round when she was a bit younger, and he invited the whole band to dinner to stare the poor lad down. luckily he thought it was cool.

but now she is out with her crush, and her parents think she is with friends, but they're too busy with the little girls to really notice what she is doing today anyway which is fine by her. they've walked to get coffee, well frappucinos, and they are now wandering to the park. it's a warm day and gigi is on summer break and hasn't seen her crush since school broke up a week ago. she's giddy. she's even more giddy when he reaches out and takes her hand, swinging it as she walks. this is what her dad writes songs about. she's convinced!

then she sees him. he'd stand out anyway. bleached blond buzz cut. abnormally tall. dark sunglasses. it's george. he's walking towards them, still at a distance. charli isn't there, which gigi thinks with regret, would probably make the situation less bad.

"oh shit," gigi says. the boy looks at her.

"what? what is it?"

"that guy," she says, pointing to him. he's getting closer. she's panicking. "that's my uncle."

"aw nice!" the boy says, "shall we go say hi?"

"no!" gigi says, "of course not. you have to hide."

"i have to what."

"hide. now."

the boy looks around, grinning, amused at her, "where am i supposed to hide. it's a street."

"erm. er. fuck," gigi says, and george is already too close. he's spotted them. his face has lit up.

"hey gus gus," he says, he scoops her into a hug. "what you up to?"

"oh nothing, just hanging with a friend."

george's eyes land on the boy. he raises an eyebrow.

"friend?" he says.

"yep!" gigi says, brightly, "anyway, we've got to go." she all but shoves the boy on. he doesnt move.

"you alright mate," george is saying to him.

"yeah thanks, you gigi's uncle?"

"yep," george says. he straightens up, tall. he blocks out the sun with his head. he puts them both in shadow. gigi takes a deep breath.

"you taking care of this girl?" george says, his face a hard line now.

"yes sir," the boy says. he holds his own. looking at george in the eye.

"you don't do harm to this girl, correct?" george says.

"yes sir."

george snaps back into his happy self. his goofball self. he smiles.

"i gotta meet my missus. cant keep the ladies waiting," he says, "can we?"

"no sir."

"nice to meet you. bye gussy. come round soon okay?" he says. he hugs gigi goodbye.

"please dont tell my dad," she whispers to him. he doesnt respond until he starts to walk away. he winks at her.

"oh ho ho. i'm telling your dad," he says. and then he is gone.

gigi puts her head in her hands, "we're screwed."

"we'll be okay. you're dad doesnt sound like a hardass," the boy says, putting his arm around gigi.

"he is when it comes to me," she says, "he'll pretend to be all cool with it but he'll stare at you when i'm not looking. cry to my mum about me growing up. "

"nothing i cant handle," the boy says.

"then he'll write a song about you called, little shit get away from my daughter or something."

"that sounds pretty cool," the boy grins at her.

Here we go guys I know it’s taken me a while to get this up and running but my writers block really hit me hard , Sorry this isn’t the next chapter to “Heart out” but it’s the first blurb to “Menswear” , if people like this short snippet I will continue it

( just a little disclaimer about this fic , 1) I am a transgender male myself so alot of this fiction is based on how I feel about myself written from another perspective and might not be the way others feel and is no way a representation of how everything will be as an experience for everyone 2) I know Matty Healy isn’t a transgender male himself so please don’t be coming at me , I know this ain’t all true based on Matty himself this is why it is fully just a fanfiction , but I really hope you like it)

Menswear

“Georgie , I need to tell you something”

“What’s up?”, George’s bleach blonde mop of ringlets bounced as he turned to look at me , we’d been sat in my room playing Mortal Kombat for hours and I really had something to tell him. It’s been eating away at me for quite some time now, We rarely ever keep things from each other, I’ve know George a couple of years now. We met at the age of 11 and immediately clicked, have been inseparable since. So the fact that I’ve had this secret from him has been destroying me. Mum had been trying to get me to talk to him. Now was as good a time as anything.

“I don’t feel like myself , I feel so wrong in myself like my skin isn’t my own , my thoughts belong to someone else, my body doesn’t match my brain”, I can tell instantly that he has no idea what I’m trying to say, he’s just looking at me with that wide eyed vacant expression that he tends to have when we’re high or he’s confused as all hell.

“What are you talking about ey “, George strolled over to me and plonked himself at the edge of the bed. “ you know you can always tell me if something is wrong”

“I know I know , that’s what I’m trying to do, just let me think for a second okay ?”, I couldn’t look at him. My heart was racing and I could 100% feel a panic coming on. I don’t know why really because I know he’d never judge but telling George feels scarier than telling my Mum and Dad. I took a deep breath , tried to pull myself together and took George’s hand in mine. “I’m transgender George , I don’t feel like a women, I hate everything about it, I want to be a man , no uh …..no , want to be is the wrong phrasing,… I um … I am one” , I could feel tears running down my face alongside George’s other hand on my cheek stroking them away.

“Well then , what would you like me to call you, because I’d like to refer to correctly from now on lad”, The moment he called me lad I knew George would forever be the most amazing person in my life. It just confirmed to me all my thoughts , I knew he’d never judge but it was still scary to think about it. I immediately wrapped my arms around him and grappled him into a tight hug, crying tears of joy, partly because he understood how I felt and accepted me as myself and also because he called me “lad” , that’s what he calls all the boys that we know.

“Mum and I were talking about names , and we really liked the name Matthew, but but but I think I like Matty for short”, George giggled with me and wrestled me into a headlock.

“Matty it is then ey …. Well then Matty, let’s get back to this game so I can beat your ass”

That’s was when we were 14 years old but now here I am at 18 sitting in my bathroom with George about to take my first short of testosterone

Go for it I really wanna answer some questions when I’m on my break at work this will be soooo fun

The 1975 related questions (◡‿◡✿)