Unpopular But True: A Large Reason Why Grocery Store Are Empty Now Isn’t Just Because There’s A Bunch

edward elric and the case of the many parental figures

Harpea’s Cave, Navarra, Spain

Truth, the smiling smug bastard who made everyone’s life hell in FMA:B. Or did he?

 Let’s start with our favourite kick-ass mother, Izumi.

Izumi opened the portal of truth in order to try and revive her child that she lost in childbirth, and because of her ignorance Truth took her ability to reproduce, unable to have children of her own anymore.

Except, because of what she went through, and her ability to perform highly complex alchemy, she gained two sons. Ed and Al

Moving on to the Flame Alchemist Himself.

Roy Mustang had his eyes always looking to the future. He kept his eyes forward, aiming to be the country’s leader. Truth took away his sight.

Except, with this he was able to remove his tunnel vision and expand his views to see the work that needed to be done in Ishval and devoted his life to it.

The Elric Brothers?

Ed and Al wanted to be a family again, and wanted to feel a mother’s love again, and so Al lost his ability to feel warmth, and Ed lost his leg to stand with his family. They were a broken, incomplete family.

Except, their quest to get their bodies back gave them a family greater than a mother and father. Their family grew to one of huge sizes, whom supported them the whole way.

Truth is one, Truth is all, Truth is God, Truth is the universe.

Truth took away 10, and gave back 11.

Inequivalent Exchange

tony has had an on and off crush on rhodney since they were really young. sometimes he thinks he's over it and then rhodney will do Something and tony's heart skips a beat and is just like "oh no." and gets real down on himself because obviously rhodney would never love him in the same way

this has been sitting in my asks for a while bc i love it but i always felt like i couldn’t do it justice but here i am willing to try let’s do this 

The first time Tony thinks about even liking Rhodey, it’s when he gets him cough medicine and water when he’s sick. 

“You dumbass, you’re sick,” Rhodey says. “You need to care of that.” 

“I am invincible,” Tony scoffs. He then sneezes so hard that he nearly falls off the couch. Rhodey rolls his eyes. 

“You giant dork, don’t get me sick. We’re gonna watch some crap television.” They end up getting around to watching Star Trek: Next Generation, which isn’t crap, and Tony looks at Rhodey. 

He’s really cute. 

Oh no. None of that. A.) Why the hell would Rhodey date him? B.) There are better options for Rhodey. C.) Mom and dad would kill him for even dating a man. 

Turns out he doesn’t have to worry about reason C after a while. But he has a lot more on his plate after the reason gets resolved. 

He hides in his lab for one week. He’s creating, definitely not crying, and drinking scotch that Howard said should only be allowed to come out when there was a major business deal. 

Rhodey finds him in the lab, working on another weapon. “Tones,” Rhodey says. He looks up. Rhodey looks nice. Tired. 

“You don’t have to be here,” Tony says. “I know I’m a mess, I don’t want you dealing with all…that.” 

“Want and need are two very different concepts,” Rhodey says, laughing as Tony rolls his eyes. There was this required literature class, Tony hated it, and Rhodey loved teasing him about it. He was funny like that. “Come on up, I made you the greasiest breakfast alive.” 

“With brown sugar bacon?” 

“Yes, as long as you help me wash everything because I don’t know how to work the dishwasher and you do. Come on.” 

So they eat breakfast together, and the sunlight hits, and Tony wishes that this could be life permanently. Him and Rhodey, eating breakfast and watching the news or reading it. 

But it can’t be. Because Rhodey is…he’s someone else. He’s the kind of guy who deserves to have a nice house, wonderful partner, kids if he wants them, and two dogs. He’s the kind of guy who doesn’t need such a fuck-up in his life, because honestly, Rhodey has higher standards. Thank god. 

So Tony turns to see the news, and they’re still talking about Howard and Maria Stark, and the tragedy, and how their son hasn’t come to the media. When will he come so that they can act like they care about his state of being, like they don’t want all the grisly details? Tony, Tony, can you tell us about the car? How did they look? Where were you? Why weren’t you with your family? And Tony will smile and charm them and hate everything about it. 

He does that. Puts on a suit, a deep red tie, and lets loose. He tells them that it’s not their business, and that they were going to take a romantic getaway together. “And of course, you can’t have romantic with a kid in the way,” Tony says, and the reporter laughs. 

Rhodey greets him at home with a hug, hot chocolate, and a promise that Tony’s gonna get the best fucking Christmas present ever. Oh! They also got a real Christmas tree! 

Tony’s never had a real Christmas tree. Well, they have. Maria liked to keep up appearances, pretend like they all cared about the holiday and what it meant. But this is…different. Rhodey did a haul at ornament stores and found the worst ones. The rejects, the funny ones, and the neon plastic. 

“This is going to look awful honey bear,” Tony remarks. “Let’s do it.” 

They put on the radio, dance to Christmas music, and Tony realizes that most people actually have fun on the holiday. Who knew? 

Tony’s flown to the Rhodes’ house for Christmas. “You’re not spending it alone,” Rhodey says. “You’d probably drink too much and pass out.” 

“Saying that’s a bad thing?” 

“Well, Mama makes the best Christmas dinner and you know it.” 

Mr. and Mrs. Rhodes greet Tony like he’s a son coming home, and Tony can’t help but think that maybe this is how parents were supposed to be. And then he feels guilty because his literally just died what the hell–and Mama just pulls him into a hug. 

“Come on, help me around the house, hmm?” 

Rhodey complains that Mama treats Tony more like a son than her actual son, the one she birthed, and Tony just laughs as they string dried oranges and cranberries onto a string for decoration. 

“Jimmy, have some heart. And go to the store and get me some more apples, wouldn’t you?” 

It’s Christmas Eve when Tony and Rhodey are playing chess together, and Rhodey says that he’s really glad that Tony came. He was worried. 

It is Christmas Eve when Tony realizes he’s in love with James Rupert Rhodes, but he’s never going to do anything about it. 

Women saving each other. 

The au you never knew you wanted:

Suburban Batfam

Batfam goes undercover to infiltrate the community of a suburban neighbourhood in hopes of discovering a secret society

Everyone (mainly Tim and Dami) argue over who gets the biggest room

Bruce gets it because it’s the master suite

When the fam moves in, their next-door neighbours give them cookies

The neighbours seem a little too nice, so nobody touches them at first

Except for Tim, who wasn’t there when it happened

He thought Damian was a little too eager when he offered some to him, but he ate them anyway

“Why are you eating the cookies? I thought you said they were too suspicious.”

“I offered them to Drake the other day and he hasn’t keeled over yet, so I deduced that they were safe for consumption.”

The neighbours across the street are very nosey and (in damian’s opinion) ask too many questions

He’s as suspicious of them as they are curious about the batfam

When asked about why their dad isn’t seen much, the boys shrug and say that he works the night shift and saves lives

Damian feeds all of the neighbourhood cats, strays or otherwise.

He slowly amasses an army of cats

Selina approves of it. Bruce? Not so much.

He still pays for the cat food though

Jason acquires a dog somehow

Dick feels like he takes better care of it and that it should be his

Tim disagrees

It’s still up for debate

Damian eventually convinces Bruce to let him bring Titus over as well

Duke and the girls come over every other weekend for family night

They receive noise complaints every time

Due to a fight between Dami and Tim, the tv is broken and mario kart is officially banned from the house

One of Damian’s cats has a litter of kittens and everyone secretly thinks they’re adorable (except Dick, who readily says it to anyone who will listen)

Jason sneaks off to play with them when nobody’s looking

Bruce is no better

Nobody really knows how to cook except for Dick

It’s more like he can boil things and use the oven without catching anything on fire, but still

Jay can too, but nobody needs to know that

And maybe Bruce, but he’s too busy to cook

Dami can only cook eggs

He tries

Alfred visits every now and then to make sure nobody’s burnt down the house and drops off various sweets

His consideration is greatly appreciated

Tim isn’t allowed anywhere near the oven since the 2nd time he caught it on fire

Tim befriends a group of moms and speed walks with them every morning to hear about the latest gossip

Sometimes it helps with the investigation

Sometimes there are rumours about Bruce

Sometimes they’re true

Tim laughs them off while internally freaking out

“Did you hear?” -Kelly

“Hear what?” -Janet

“There’s a rumour going around that *Bruce Wayne* is living in our neighbourhood.” -Kelly

“No way!” -Janet

“Yes way!“ -Kelly

"Heheheh, what a crazy rumour, right? There’s *no way* somebody like Bruce would move to our modest neighbourhood.” -Tim, sweating nervously

They were invited to a cook-out pool party once.

Somehow, Jason caught the pool on fire

Never again were they invited to such an occasion.

Everybody keeps forgetting that Alfred isn’t around and consequently, forget to do chores

One time the dishes piled up so high, they collapsed on poor Damian

Bruce had to devise a chore chart to make sure everybody did their part in keeping the house relatively nice looking

Dick dog sat for one of their neighbours once and their daughter watched him through their security cameras.

She has a crush on him now & is a little stalker-y.

:)

Could you draw someone being affectionate with Damian and him being grumpy about it (but secretly enjoying it)? Love your artwork! <3

Dick never got that scarf back

the saddest part of a small fandom is having to make the memes yourself :///

Jason: I like big butts and I cannot lie, no other brother can deny-

Tim: For a great low rate you can get online, go to The General and save some time!