Jason: I Like Big Butts And I Cannot Lie, No Other Brother Can Deny-

“Safety first. What are you? FIVE?” Tony/rhodey

“Oh my god, seriously?” Rhodey groans. “Safety goggles?” 

“Yes,” Tony answers primly. “I wasn’t raised like an animal, Rhodey.” 

“Oh, rich boy?” Rhodey asks. “I saw you come home last night and attack that ramen as if you were eating your last meal as a wild dog. Shut up.” Tony rolls his eyes, still snapping his goggles on. 

“I’m sorry, I’d rather be blinded by something else rather than my lack of knowledge about basic safety procedures, darling dearest.” 

“Can you guys quit flirting and actually get started on your robot?!” Kendra calls from the other side of the room. “Some of us actually ate a good breakfast!” Rhodey flips her off, but takes a pair of goggles. 

“Only because you’re a nerd for safety,” he says. 

“Whatever you say honey,” Tony responds. “Besides, don’t listen to Kendra. We’re already about two weeks ahead of schedule, and I think this one is gonna be awesome.” 

“We already built Dum-E, who you said was going to be awesome, and then he planned a road trip to downtown Boston,” Rhodey snarks. “Real classy, by the way.” 

“You’re the one who gave him a rambunctious personality,” Tony says. “I’m not responsible for that one.” 

“And yet, everyone attributes it to you,” Rhodey says. “Almost like you’re the troublemaker.” 

“You love it,” Tony grins, going in for a quick peck. “I was thinking, they put in a new Indian restaurant, and I met the new owner, and he said we should stop by for date night. They promise the best ever.” 

“You just want an opportunity to tip over a hundred percent.” 

“…correct.” Rhodey rolls his eyes. 

“Sure, babe. Six work okay for you?” 

“Yes!” 

i deal in #facts only

im still waitin for the day where, for whatever convoluted and/or convenient reason, mustang Has to put ed in charge of the office for the day because ed is the highest ranked officer there

oh man can you imagine?

honestly the fact that Ed is officially ranked as a major never reached its full potential for humor (or angst, honestly, depending on how you use it)

Mustang HAS to put Ed in charge and Team Mustang just kind of….goes with it. They all KNOW they’re mostly just humoring the kid, but ED doesn’t know that, and he is so damn smug about it the whole time. He sits in Roy’s chair and does about 10 different impressions of him until he gets bored. He tries to prop his feet up on the desk but the chair isn’t quite tall enough for him to do it comfortably, so he ends up sitting in a ridiculously uncomfortable position just for spite.

Of course he doesn’t REALLY have full jurisdiction over Mustang’s office, but no one really told ED that, and for the most part Team Mustang just carries all his orders out while trying not to laugh. 

Alphonse is so appalled the whole time, though. “Brother, I don’t think you should tell them to do that! Brother, that’s rude. Brother, please transmute the colonel’s desk back to normal, the gargoyles and spikes are kind of tacky.”

I would die for romantic iron husbands, but platonic rhodeytony?? Fuck. They literally destroy toxic masculinity.

Snuggling? They do that. Hugging? They invented that. Kissing each other’s cheeks? They made that. Being close and comfortable with one another without the cursed “no homo” exchange? They own that!!!

modern au mei isnt actually a princess her dad (scar) just calls her that cause she’s one of those little girls who wants nothing more than to be ariel from the little mermaid. you know those little girls who wear full on costume disney princess dresses with jeans underneath to the grocery store and its fine

💖🧡💙

Art by Liberal Jane

this fandom still out here falling over all these military mcu heroes but still acting like Rhodey don’t outrank most if not all of them outside of Nick Fury. 

boogie woogie woogie

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